Category: Thoughts & Musings

In Support Of KLIA East @ Labu Airport

I wanna take a break from writing about silly things on the net to focus on something slightly more serious.


Over the past few weeks, there have been some intense debate online and offline over AirAsia’s intention to build their own airport.

The gist of the story so far is, due to AirAsia’s rapid expansion, it is fast outgrowing the current LCCT airport it is operating out of. So AirAsia approached Sime Darby and a proposal was put forth to the government to build a new budget airport called KLIA East.


The new airport will be completely funded by private funds, and it will be located 20km to the east of the present KLIA in the Negri Sembilan town of Labu. Not only will this new airport be able to accommodate AirAsia’s growing size, it will also be better connected by road and rail to both KL city and main airport.

The government had a look at the proposal and subsequently approved it, but almost immediately a huge uproar from the public resulted.

Some were saying that the proposed Labu Airport will be located too close to KLIA to be safe. Others were saying that it is located too far from KLIA for transferring of passengers to be convenient. Most people were saying that it is a waste of money for a fourth airport in KL to be built after Subang, KLIA and LCCT – never mind the fact that AirAsia assured that not a single sen of tax payer’s money will be used.

Then there are those who resort to insults and personal attacks, slandering both AirAsia boss Tony Fernandes and the government, accusing them for being corrupted and uncaring towards the ordinary Malaysian.

Among the fiercest critics of AirAsia’s plans were several prominent social-political bloggers including Jeff Ooi, Rocky and PKR MP Wee Choo Keong. Even our former Prime Minister Tun Dr Mahathir got nasty with his words, eventhough he is that very same man who sold AirAsia to Tony Fernandes for RM1 eight years ago when the airline was making huge losses under DRB-HiCom.


The outcry from the online community was so loud that someone even set up an online campaign to boycott AirAsia.

Faced with such intense and public online controversy, AirAsia did something remarkably unprecedented in Malaysia.

While most corporations would’ve kept quiet and carried on with their business (after all they have already got the proposal approved), AirAsia decided to respond to their critics, sceptics and haters by launching a micro-site on KLIA East. Providing facts and figures, AirAsia tactfully explained the need to build a new airport and showed how such a project would bring more benefits than harm to the rakyat.

To anyone reading through the FAQs, it is clear that AirAsia is pointing a large Airbus-sized finger squarely towards Malaysia Airports Berhad, the sole operator of the three airports in Kuala Lumpur.


AirAsia said that all three airports are not suitable because Subang is too small, KLIA is too expensive and LCCT is not expanding fast enough to cater towards their rapid growth. AirAsia is pretty much forced out due to the incompetence of Malaysia Airports.

To much surprise from everybody, Malaysia Airports did not sit still when faced with criticism either. Instead, they launched a series of announcements on their own website to rebuff AirAsia’s claims. Normally, people can’t be care less to log on to Malaysia Airports website. But because of this fiasco, web traffic at suddenly shot through the roof!

Google Maps 22012009 101636 AM

According to Malaysia Airports, there are indeed plans to develop KLIA North, a dedicated budget terminal located just next to the existing KLIA main terminal.

The only problem it’ll take longer to build and estimated to cost twice as much compared to KLIA East. Therefore it is AirAsia’s fault that they are impatient and instead run off to build their own airport.


So to summarised what has happened, Dr Mahathir points his finger to AirAsia on his website, AirAsia points its finger to Malaysia Airports on their website, Malaysia Airports claimed innocence and pointed its finger back to AirAsia.

And I thought “blog wars” are the domain of bored teenagers who got nothing better to do with their lives. Who would’ve thought a “blog war” would occur between AirAsia, Malaysia Airports and the former Prime Minister of Malaysia?


Reading through some of the harsh comments online, I honestly cannot help but to feel terribly sorry for Tony Fernandes.

I can see that AirAsia’s intentions are noble.

Tony Fernandes wants to build a cost-efficient airport, so that savings can be passed onto the consumers. He wants a large airport so that AirAsia can connect Malaysia to the rest of the world, so that Kuala Lumpur can usurp Bangkok and Singapore as South East Asia’s aviation hub. Tony Fernandes truly believes that this project is good for everybody, and he has even worked out a way to do these without spending much of tax-payer’s money. KLIA East seems like such a great win-win solution for everybody.


But instead of being lauded and praised for taking the initiative to bring about positive change to KL, Tony Fernandes was attacked, insulted and ridiculed by the online community. Instead of getting even a
little bit of appreciation and thank you’s from the community, he was accused of undermining national interest, of robbing people’s money to achieve his own selfish aims.

For a businessman as far-sighted as he is, the ugly fallout from this incident is perhaps something he had least expected.


And that is why I felt compelled to write something here to show my support for Tony Fernandes.

Then again, who am I?

I am not a politician. I am not a businessman. I am just a 26-year-old guy with a naive understanding of the world. No where am I ANYWHERE near the calibre of Jeff Ooi and Rocky, let alone that of Tun Dr Mahathir.


If there is one credential I have over them, it is the fact that I have used the LCCT airport more frequently than all three of them combined. That’s a fact, because I have been travelling in and out of LCCT so frequently, I see the immigration officers there more often than I see my mom’s face.

I am a consumer. And the only thing I can say about the LCCT is that it sucks. The airport sucks so bad, we could’ve make more money if we market it as a porn star.


Make no mistake about it. I hated it when AirAsia moved out of KLIA four years ago, and I am still hating it every single day until today. The LCCT is such an overcrowded slum that if the fare difference isn’t much, I’d rather pay extra to fly MAS.

Gimme the frills of checking in at KL Sentral and riding KLIA Express anytime.

Clearly AirAsia cannot stay in the current LCCT. So that leaves us with two options: (1) move to Malaysia Airports’ KLIA North, or (2) let AirAsia build their own airport at KLIA East.


On the surface, KLIA North sounds like an ideal option. I too, would’ve supported AirAsia moving back into KLIA or at least somewhere close to it. But due to problems with the soil and the train tracks, it will take twice as long to build and cost twice as much. As consumers, are you prepared to pay extra for that? Do you all want to pay more for your air tickets?

If they wanna develop KLIA North, they could’ve done so four years ago before the current LCCT is constructed.

Building KLIA North apparently will involve a significant portion of taxpayer’s money. OUR money. Money that could be better spent on things like education, healthcare and luxury mansions of corrupt politicians.

Now, compare that with KLIA East, which can be constructed ready in two year’s time and won’t even cost the government a single sen. While other cities in Malaysia on their knees are begging for an airport, AirAsia is willing to give one to KL free of charge!

Please remind me why are we having this debate again?


True, people do not like redundancy – having two set of control towers, immigration and customs instead of one is wasteful. But come on, if you wanna talk about redundancy, why don’t you talk about how many redundant shopping malls we have in KL first? Why not shut down Subang and move Firefly and Berjaya to KLIA?

People are scared AirAsia may compromise safety to save costs. For example, instead of building airport runways, AirAsia might land on Amber Chia’s chest.


But are these rational fears? Why would AirAsia wanna compromise on their unblemished safety record? To put it simply, it is bad business for any airline to crash their planes.

Of course, as private entities, profit-making is their primary aim. But the intense competition between the two airlines has virtually left them no room for errors and plenty for improvement. These airlines know that if they screw up, we the consumers will switch to their competitor just like that.

Letting AirAsia build their own airport is sure to bring the already fiery and intense competition between the two to yet another level. Don’t forget that at the end of the day, the one benefiting the most out of these competition is us. Don’t we all want cheaper fares?


The next question people would wanna ask is: why is Kenny Sia writing all these? How much did AirAsia pay

The answer is zero.

AirAsia has not paid me a single cent to write anything for them. In fact, AirAsia has never even advertised on

On the contrary, their direct competitor Malaysia Airlines is among my biggest advertisers. For me to write this entry, I am risking not just having AirAsia critics attack me, I am also risking my website’s revenue stream.


But I am saying what needs to be said.

And the reason I am writing this is because I feel that maybe Malaysians can get a bit too negative sometimes. There are FAR wasteful and controversial government projects in Malaysia that warrant our attention, like the CIQ Complex in Johor and the Bakun Dam in Sarawak. Yet I cannot help but feel that in this particular instance we are beating up the good guys.

Something is very wrong here.

Airlines like MAS and AirAsia, in my mind, are doing a great service for this country. For that, they deserve our commendation. But what I am seeing here is that instead of supporting them, we are beating them up with a stick.

It’s like helping a fallen girl off the floor, then getting wrongfully accused for molesting.


That is why as a frequent flier, I am throwing my support behind AirAsia to construct KLIA East @ Labu.

Because I believe Malaysians should not be so pessimistic and negative about everything. Because competition is good for the consumers. Because if AirAsia can do what Malaysia Airports do, but in a way that’s faster, cheaper and more efficient, then for us consumers the choice is clear.

Don’t say no to KLIA East.

Supporting this project is the way to go.

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Barack Hussein Obama

Tomorrow, the world will witness ‘change’ as Barack Obama starts his first day of work as the President of the United States.


And I just found out today also that the Defence Minister of Israel, aka the man responsible for the war in Gaza and the most hated man in the Arab realm right now, is a guy named Ehud Barak.

As if having “Hussein” and something that sounds like “Osama” in the name wasn’t bad enough for his image, somebody had to ruin “Barack” for him as well. Suddenly, the President of the United States share similar names with the evil Ehud Barak, Saddam Hussein and Osama bin Laden.

With a name like Barack Hussein Obama, everyone would’ve expected him to look like this.



But the future President of the USA was recently photographed looking more like this.


Holy cow! A world leader with a six-pack abs!

Can we have that too, Mr Najib?

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Things I Learnt In Zouk Singapore

So I was in Singapore two weekends ago for a business trip.

I must apologise to friends in Singapore for not meeting up when I was in town. I was holed up in my hotel room rushing for a deadline. By the time I finished it was already 1am.
My hotel was pretty close to Zouk, so when I was done staring at the computer screen for 6 hours straight, I thought it’s only deserving that I walk over to the club and reward myself with a glass of ice cold beer.

It’s been ages since I been to Zouk in Singapore, and I gotta say a lot has changed. Not necessarily in a good way, but definitely in an amusing way.
As soon as I stepped into Phuture, immediately I noticed something unusual – there were more batangs than lubangs.
The boys in the club heavily outnumbered the girls by some 4 to 1, so much so that I almost made a U-turn towards the exit thinking I’ve accidentally entered a gay club. I’m not homophobic, but let’s face it, watching pairs of guys dancing with each other on the floor ain’t a pretty sight.

The second thing I noticed is the dressing sense of the people in there. For better or worse, the Singaporeans are always ahead of us Malaysians when it comes to fashion.
Whatever’s popular in Singapore becomes always popular in Kuching 5 years later. And there are some good ones we picked up. Case in point, short skirts and spaghetti straps from MNG.
There are some bad ones too. Like those Chao Ah Beng hairstyles back in the 90s.

When I was in Zouk that Saturday night, I was surprised to see a lot of guys there wearing hats.
No, not baseball caps. Those are still cool.
HATS. Like the ones your grandpa wore back in the 60s.

Not only that, a lot were also wearing thick black-rimmed glasses. Again, just like the ones your grandpa wore back in the 60s.
What’s up with that?
I’m surprised they didn’t bring along a walking stick to the club. It seems as if the new fashion is old-fashion. In fact, there were so many guys in the club going for “The Vintage Look”, Phuture should be renamed Phistory.
I dunno man. I reckon in this day and age, the only time people should be allowed to wear hats and black-rimmed glasses to a club is if you have a cool name.

If not, then maybe john.a.than or lim.ah.seng will do too.
The girls in the club , for the record, are HOT.

Not the best example, but… you get the idea

These girls they dress up hot, they make up hot, they breathe hot. And when they go to the club together, they dress up in their tiniest sluttiest clothing knowing that it’ll get attention of all the guys in the clubs.

But these girls are in for a girls night out. They’re not interested in meeting any guys whatsoever. When they go out clubbing, they just wanna dance among their own girly circles while the guys, wearing their Ah Gong vintage hat and black-rimmed glasses, can only salivate.

More often than not, this creates an interesting situation where two hot girls get on the dance floor doing their sexy dance moves with each other, while some EIGHT other guys surround them in a circle watching.

The guys are thinking that those girls wanna get picked up, so they moved in for the kill.
Problem is, these guys have NO CREATIVITY whatsoever when it comes to approaching girls. A lot of the times, they just sneakily dance up from behind the girl and, without even a hello or an eye-contact, somehow just put their hands on her waist.

Then as soon as the DJ plays one of those slut songs (eg. “Buttons”, “Culo”, “Low”, anything by Britney Spears or Fergie), they HUMP AND GRIND from behind as hard as they can.

Bear in mind, these guys don’t know the girls at all. Because as soon as they finished grinding them, I saw them turn around, shake the girl’s hands and introduce themselves.
Hello?! A minute ago you were just dry-humping her ass! How can you immediately go from that to shaking hands!

It wasn’t just a particular incidence because I saw it happening multiple times throughout the night. The girls must be used to it because a lot of them don’t seem to mind, or care. Some of them did try to move away to another part of the dance floor, but all they’ll encounter is another bunch of guys doing the same thing.

As for the guys, well, they were hi-fiving to their other guy friends afterwards, so I guess there must be some kinda contest going on. The more asses you dry-humped, the more of a man you are. Or something like that.
No wonder all the Singaporean bloggers I read are not going to clubs anymore.

All of them now prefers to stay at home and play mahjong instead!

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Advertorial: 5% Tax, 10% Service Charge, 100% Stupidity

You know what I find annoying?

You know how when you walk into your favourite cafe like say, Starbucks, and you see them advertising on their blackboard – Grande Green Tea Frappucinno RM 14.50.

Fine. So you diligently pull out the exact change for RM 14.50 from your wallet – one RM 10 note, four RM 1 notes and 50 sen in coins.

The Starbucks cashier keys in your order and the bill came up to… RM 15.25.

Hang on, wait a minute. How did RM 15.25 came about? I thought the menu said RM 14.50. What’s up with the extra 75 sen, man?
You take a look at the bill, and there it is.

What the hell? Why do I have to pay an extra 5% on top of the RM 14.50 that you advertised on your menu?
Did you give me 5% more milk?
Did you sprinkle 5% more green tea on my frappucinno?
Did the lady on the Starbucks logo show 5% more cleavage?
Then tell me Starbucks, why the buck do I have to pay an extra 5% on my RM 14.50?

If it’s an option I that I ask to add on to my drink, like a syrup maybe, then fine I understand.
But if the 5% is something fixed that I cannot escape from, why don’t you just bucking include that into your menu prices then!? It makes it virtually impossible to prepare for an exact change when you pay for your drink. You ALWAYS have to wait for the cashier to ring up your order on the till before you can find out exactly how much you need to pay.

The worst is when you visit a restaurant like Pizza Hut, where on top of the 5% government tax that you must pay, you also have to pay the 10% service charge.
So a simple meal that’s advertised as RM 12.80 on the menu, after 10% service charge, 5% government tax and minus 2 sen rounding, ended up costing RM 14.70.
HELLO? Like, how the Hut am I supposed to know that?

If you want me to pay RM 14.70 for your pasta meal, then freaking put RM 14.70 on your freaking menu! Don’t put RM 12.80, then say “subject to 10% service charge and 5% tax”!
What do you think we are? Calculus graduates from Harvard? We just wanna eat at Pizza Hut man, we don’t wanna calculate how much each meal is gonna cost before we enter your restaurant.
If I have exactly RM12.80 in my pocket, I wanna freaking go to Pizza Hut and buy that freaking meal for RM12.80. I don’t wanna go to your restaurant with RM12.80, order a meal that says RM12.80 on your menu, then have to bloody fork out RM14.70 for it!
Dammit, why do you have to make it so difficult for us to give you money?!
The worst is when you go out in a group of say 10 friends.

Anybody wanna split this bill?

Some people order a RM40 steak, others just want a RM5 drink and everyone else orders different things. At the end of the night when you try to split the bill, you’re never gonna know who should be paying how much!
WHY? Because the guy ordering the RM40 steak should be paying RM46 and the girl ordering the RM5 drink should be paying RM5.75!
Seriously, this habit of advertising half-arsed prices has gotta stop. Cafes, restaurants and hotels are the most frequent offenders in this category.
But do you know who are the worst offenders?
Airline companies.

We’ve heard all the catchphrases they used in marketing.
RM9 One Way!
And my personal favourite:

How lah like that?
Anybody who’s travelled on our airlines before would know that unless you’re sleeping with the top management, it’s impossible to be paying nothing and still get on those airplanes. Those airport taxes, fuel surcharges, etc all add up to a lot. These are compulsary fixed charges that every passenger MUST pay. There’s no escape of it. But unlike Starbucks, it’s no longer just an additional 5% on top of the actual cost of the ticket.
For a Kuching – KL flight, the advertised airfares could be RM 0, but all the other compulsary airport taxes and fuel surcharges could easily add up to over RM 170. But of course, they never advertise it as RM 170. They would advertise it as ZERO FARE!
Only when you log onto their website, waste your time clicking through all the menus, THEN you’ll find out you have to fork out RM 170 in bloody surcharges.
So essentially, you’re paying RM 170 for a free ticket!
Imagine if you enter a restaurant, and the menu reads this.

It makes no sense right? Imagine if every restaurant does that, how would you feel?
Obviously if one restaurant is advertising FREE FOOD and attracting all the customers, his competitors aren’t gonna just sit around and do nothing. They’re gonna advertise ZERO COST MEALS as well to try to compete. Next thing you know, everyone is offering free food (excluding surchages) and no one would tell you their nett all-in prices.
The stupidity has gotta stop.

Thankfully, somebody is doing something about it.
Malaysia Airlines has taken the first step launching their “All Inclusive Low Fares” campaign. They now advertised their prices as all-in. None of those zero fares marketing gimmicks anymore
I say it’s about time.

A lot of people assumed Malaysia Airlines is more expensive, but that’s not always the case!
MAS flights from Kuching to KL now costs RM103, including meals and check-in luggages. It’s good value for money and the cheapest in town. Besides, flying MAS is more comfortable since the seats are wider and more spacious. And it’s a lot easier going through KLIA instead of LCCT.
But you know what’s the best thing about flying with MAS?

When you book your flights, you can call yourself a “Datuk”

Even when you’re not really a Datuk!

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Datukship For Jessica Alba

Every year on their birthdays, the State Governors in Malaysia give out presents on their own birthdays.

The birthday presents come in the form of state titles, or “Datuks”. It is a major honour to be named “Datuk” by the State Governors. “Datuk” in Malaysia is the equivalent of “Sir” in the UK.
“Datuk” is also Malay for “Grandpa”. Actually, no one knows for sure why they wanna reward people by calling them “Grandpa”, but I think it’s because the State Governor doesn’t wanna feel too old on his birthday.

Recently in Malacca, their State Governor took the unusual step to award Datukship to famous Indian actor Shahrukh Khan.
The reason they gave was that a few years ago, Shahrukh Khan (of Kuch Kuch Hotha Hai fame) filmed a movie in Malacca and many tourists visited the place as a result. A lot of people wasn’t happy because they thought that it doesn’t make sense to give such an important state title to a foreigner who hadn’t really done that much for us anyway.
However, I for one would like to state that 100% supports giving Datukship to Shahrukh Khan!

Meanwhile in Sarawak, our State Governor’s birthday is coming in a few days time.
I thought, while we were on a roll giving out state titles to foreign actors, perhaps I could add one more suggestion on who else to award the “Datuk” title to.
Well, there could only be one person.


Now I know what you’re thinking. What exactly has Jessica Alba done for Sarawak anyway?
Well, to that I say, PLENTY!
A lot of people do not know this. But many, many years ago before Jessica Alba became famous starring in big movies like Sin City and Fantastic Four, this sweet-looking Hollywood actress was actually in Sarawak filming a very low budget unknown movie called The Sleeping Dictionary.

Yes, Jessica Alba, one of the sexiest women in the world, was in my home state of Sarawak, perhaps even in my own back yard filming a movie. And I didn’t even get to meet her! *#&^$@!

You see, The Sleeping Dictionary wasn’t exactly a well-known movie even in the US.
It didn’t even get released in the cinemas, going straight to DVDs instead. For that reason, a lot of Sarawakians never knew about the movie. It is a real pity, because it is not everyday that one of the biggest names from Hollywood come here to do a movie.
But make no mistake about it, this is indeed a very “special” movie. It’s way better than whatever that One Two Ka Four movie that Shahrukh Khan did. So if his stupid movie can earn him a Datuk title, then I say The Sleeping Dictionary should at least earn Jessica Alba AT LEAST a Datuk, a Datuk Seri, a Tan Sri, a Tun and an Oscar all at one night.
And I’ll tell you why she deserves it.

For those who haven’t watched the movie, The Sleeping Dictionary has pretty much copy-and-pasted the script from the Disney movie Pocahontas.
In short, British white boy with a stiff upper lip goes deep inside the jungles of mystical Asian country, falls in love with a local native girl, then defies all customs and conventions to be with her.
But that’s where the similarities end.

First of all, the native Iban girl is played by none other than Jessica Alba.
Nevermind the fact that Jessica Alba is the most angmoh-looking Iban girl in the whole Sarawak. Just accept that JESSICA ALBA = IBAN ok?

Secondly, while every other Iban girl in the movie wears a traditional one-piece sarong, Jessica Alba’s outfit is a sexy modern two-piece sarong designed to show off her bodacious bod!

As if those two reasons are not good enough to call immediately her “Datuk Jessica Alba”, check out the kickass story line.
In the movie, the white boy’s mission to educate the uncivilised Iban villagers. At the same time, white boy is introduced to Jessica Alba, who happens to be his designated “Sleeping Dictionary”.
What exactly is a “Sleeping Dictionary”?

This is where it gets interesting.
A “Sleeping Dictionary” is a local girl whose job it is to teach white boy everything he needs to know about the Iban culture and language… BY HAVING SEX WITH HIM!

Now isn’t that awesome?! A missionary from London went to Sarawak, but ended up in a missionary position instead?
Of course, how exactly she plans on teaching him the Iban culture and language by sleeping with him is the biggest mystery of all time.

Maybe Jessica Alba’s pussy is a USB port and white boy’s dick is a USB cable, then when he’s plugged into her he can download all the information onto his “external hard drive”.
So anyway, after white boy pumped his “Sleeping Dictionary” long and hard, suddenly he found out that he had learnt a new language through Jessica Alba’s vagina. Behold the mighty power of the pussy!

Kinda reminded of this Aussie guy I once knew who dated a Japanese girl. Before this, he was just like any other Aussie guy I knew.
After just two months of dating this Japanese girl, suddenly he was spurting out crap like “kimochi” and “bukkake”. So I guess it really worked.

There were plenty of sex scenes in this movie which is extremely rare for a movie set in Malaysia.
Of course as far as the storyline goes, eventually white boy fell in love with the girl, adopt the local customs and gradually let go his British stiff upper-lip demeanour.
Apparently all the stiffness went down to his other body part.

So with a story line THIS good, how can you NOT give Datukship to the sexy sultry Jessica Alba?

If we promoted The Sleeping Dictionary right enough, I bet ya tons of tourists will be flocking into Sarawak wanting to learn a new language!
And when that happens, we’ll all be asking, “Datuk Shahrukh WHO?”
Enough bullshit.


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Ah Mad Strikes Back

The saga continues. This time, it involves tearing up a picture of his state leader.

Defiant Ahmad demands apology

“I urge the Chinese not to become like American Jews!”

“Consider this a warning! Do not push us, or we will be forced to push the Chinese for our own survival!”

After the press conference, several supporters brought down from the wall a picture of Dr Koh.

And proceeded to smash it to pieces.

For his theatrics, Ah Mad Is Mail was suspended for three years. Amazing.
That must be the Prime Minister’s first good decision in like his 5 years in power.

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Chinese Squatter

Recently, an Umno leader called Malaysian Chinese “squatters” who do not deserve equal rights in this country.
Based on news reports, this is what I think of his actions afterwards. No words are necessary.

“MCA Youth want apology from Umno chief for racist statement”

“Ahmad elusive after racist talk”

“Even PM couldn’t reach Ahmad”

“Ahmad didn’t mean it, says Abdullah”

“Najib: Umno apologises”

“Chinese leaders: It’s Ahmad who must say sorry”

“Ahmad refuses to apologise”

There is no hope for this country.

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What Makes A Malaysian A Malaysian

1. You can name all the players from the the English Premier League, but ask you to name one football player from Malaysia, one name also cannot come out.

2. When StreamyX come, you complain StreamyX too slow. When Maxis Broadband come, you complain Maxis Broadband always disconnects. When WiMax come, you complain Wimax too expensive. In the end, you say StreamyX still the best lah.
3. When toll price increase, you complain. When petrol price increase, you complain. When you go Starbucks buy RM10 coffee, NO COMPLAINTS.
4. When you cannot find parking in a shopping mall and have to walk very far, you complain. When you go inside the shopping mall and there’s SALE, run from one end of 1Utama to the other also NO COMPLAINTS.
5. This.

6. You are always late. And the excuse you give when you’re late is always either: (a) traffic jam (b) no transport or (c) cannot find parking.
7. You have a parent who force you to take science stream in high school, study engineering in Uni, then when you graduate, they ask you to forget everything you learnt in Uni and do commerce.
8. You know someone who can specially develop an angmoh accent when speaking to a American / British / Australian.
9. You complain against the government in kopitiam, you talk loud loud. Leave anonymous comments on blogs, you also talk loud loud. Attend ceremah by DAP, you shout loud loud. Then when Opposition organise a protest and ask you to go, you dun wan. Scared later kena tangkap by ISA.
10. Every year on the 30th April, you are one of the people below queueing up last minute to submit your tax return at the IRB.

11. When you pay RM10 for something that costs RM1, you blame the Chinese.
12. When a government service is too slow, you blame the Malays.
13. When a building is not good and collapsed, you blame the Indians.
14. When a Chinese student won a scholarship, you say “Wah! Very clever hor?” When a Malay student won a scholarship, you say “Aiya! Of course lah! He Malay mah!”
15. When an angmoh stranger kiss you on the cheek to say hello, you very happy. When a Malaysian guy kiss you on the cheek to say hello, you slap him.

Happy 51th Merdeka, Malaysia.


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Battle Of The Chief Ministers

The only thing missing in the lead up to the live debate between the current and the former Penang Chief Ministers next week, is this.

The Official Guan Eng vs Tsu Koon Betting Sheet

Lim Guan Eng

Koh Tsu Koon
Odds Bet Amount Odds Bet Amount
First To Speak 1.9 RM 1.9 RM
First To Stutter And Stammer 4.6 RM 1.7 RM
First To Shout At Opponent And Lose His Cool 5.2 RM 1.3 RM
First To Make Personal Attack Against Opponent 1.8 RM 2.5 RM
Loudest Applause From Audience 1.8 RM 2.5 RM
Stutters The Most 4.6 RM 1.7 RM
Speaks Beyond Allocated Time Limit 1.01 RM 1.0001 RM
Purposely Avoid Answering Difficult Questions 2.5 RM 1.8 RM
Wears A Suit Three Sizes Too Big 1.02 RM 54.6 RM
Secretly Looks At Written Notes The Most 1.51 RM 4.2 RM
Most Attempts At Lame Jokes 4.6 RM 1.7 RM
Most Insincere Smile 3.2 RM 1.5 RM
Sweats The Most 1.4 RM 4.3 RM
Most Animated Hand Gestures During Speech 6.4 RM 1.2 RM
Overall Debate Winner
(No Handicap)
1.01 RM 258 RM
Overall Debate Winner
(Guan Eng Give Half Ball, Tsu Koon Eat)
1.3 RM 2.4 RM

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