Wedding Weekend In Melaka

Busy working on a secret project = little time to blog = random photo diarrhoea.

I flew into Melaka last weekend to attend the wedding of a friend of mine.

Pierre is the brand manager at Mamee Double-Decker Group and he’s responsible for a lot of campaigns I did for his company over the past couple of years.

I am always gonna be thankful towards him because this guy gave me so many once-in-a-lifetime opportunities that I would never have imagined otherwise. Among some of the most memorable collaborations we did was my acting in a TV Commercial for Mister Potato, my meeting with Jay Chou and most recently our M.P.F.C. trip to Old Trafford Stadium to watch the historic match between Manchester United and Liverpool.

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Which is why when he asked me to be one of his “brothers” for his big day, I felt so privileged that I agreed without thinking twice.

Little did I expect the horror that was awaiting us in the form of… BRIDESMAIDS FROM HELL.

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In Chinese wedding tradition, it is common for the bridesmaids act as guards for the bride. In order for the groom to prove that his love for the bride is real, these girls, in the name of sick sadistic fun, are tasked with torturing the groom and his “brothers” before they would allow him to see his bride.

As loyal “brothers” for Pierre, of course we are happy to take the bullet for him lah.

Until this happened.

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No, this is not what you think it is.

This is the most painful torture ever created since the Qin Dynasty.

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See our legs? See their hands on our legs?

That, my friend, is a WAX STRIP.

And this is my leg after the wax strip treatment.

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FREAKING PAIN OK.

Somebody call the World Wildlife Fund. There’s a massive deforestation on my leg!

I was so emotionally traumatised that I chickened out of the next torture. LUCKY I DID!

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I ask you hor. Where got bridesmaid so creative until they can come up the evil idea of tying a balloon right behind our ass, then asking the brother at the back to pop the balloon of the brother in the front…

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… using their crotch!

Look at how much that chick on the left was enjoying herself with all the entertainment that we provide! What the hell! VERY FUNNY MEH!?

Ok lah, actually quite funny. Especially when you are not the one being tortured.

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This is Timothy Tiah, my blog advertising agent and one of Malaysia’s leading young entrepreneur.

This is Timothy Tiah, sharing a “Brokeback Mountain” moment with another one of Pierre’s “brothers”.

Damn.

I can never have a brotherly relationship with any one of the guys if I had to go through with the balloon-humping or paper-kissing torture.

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So I had a piece of WASABI SANDWICH that literally made my throat go through a nuclear meltdown!

But nevermind. It’s okay! In the name of brotherhood, we, the “brothers” of Pierre Pang shall gladly stand up for our groom!

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It is, after all, his big day. And we saw how happy he was to see his bride, suddenly we felt what we went through was all worth it.

After all, he’s the one giving up his bachelor life forever. Heh heh heh.

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We have some free time after the morning session, so Timothy, Audrey and I treated ourselves to some Mille Crepe Cake at Nadeje in Melaka Raya.

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Mesmerized couple is mesmerized by the 100 Plus.

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Pierre and Lay See’s Parisian-themed wedding was very lavish and well-appointed. No expense was spared and nothing but the absolute best food was served.

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It’s the Brand Manager’s wedding, so naturally lots of Mister Potato was served during the cocktail reception.

It’s all about branding!

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The groom is also a proud Hainanese, so during the wedding dinner, we were served Hainanese chicken rice as part of the menu.

I thought it was a real nice touch, and a good deviation from the usual food they serve during a typical wedding banquet.

Next time I marry, I’m gonna serve Kuching kolo mee, Sarawak laksa and 3-layer Teh-C-special.

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Mesmerized couple is mesmerized by Eiffel Tower wedding cake.

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The loving couple, the newly weds.

My hormones kicked in again urging me to start dating. Shut up hormones! No time lah, how to date?

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The bride and her loving bunch of friends.

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The groom and HIS loving bunch of friends.

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Doing the classic Chinese wedding tradition, singing “Ai Pia Jia Eh Yia” (Literally, “Be determined and you shall win”) on karaoke.

CHECK OUT THAT OLD MAN IN STRIPED SHIRT!

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Sa hun ti chu tia! Chit hun ko pa pia!

AI PIA JIA EH YIAAAA!

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Next morning, with residual alcohol from the previous night running through my veins, I decided to have a morning jog around Melaka.

It was such an enjoyable run! The course I took was mostly flat and there were many cool paths along the rivers and waterways that made Melaka such a pleasant place to run in. If somebody can just organize a marathon in Melaka, I’d be the first person to sign up.

Spotted the Tenaga Nasional shop in Melaka. Don’t you find their slogan a bit arrogant?

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Suddenly I have this mental image of TNB workers coming in the morning and dancing to “I’ve Got The Power!” *cues electronic music”

Anyway, after my morning exercise, Tim, Audrey and I negated my efforts running 14km earlier by having chicken rice balls for lunch.

Nobody ever instructed me the proper way of eating chicken rice balls, so this is what I did.

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I shall call this, Melaka Sushi!

79 Replies to “Wedding Weekend In Melaka”

  1. I’m so glad you enjoyed Melaka, it is the best place on earth! And yes, Melakans have a great sense of humor and creativity, that’s why the enjoyable Chip San Leong ceremony and the TNB shop sign.
    *sigh* I was supposed to attend the wedding too, with my Mum, but had to be in Singapore that weekend. Still kicking myself for missing Melaka’s grandest wedding of the year.
    Never mind, I hear that a video of it is coming out soon.

  2. Eh Glad u enjoyed Malacca!
    And Did you notice that Tim and Ming’s blog post about the wedding doesn’t tally?
    So was it 11 or 14 years old?

  3. greetings frm thailand~!! glad 2 hear that u had a wonderful wkend.. i long time never go 2 melaka liao lo.. gotta visit there some times..

  4. Authentic chicken rice balls are from Muar. The balls are bigger there, just like yours. =)
    You should take a visit to that town. They serve the best food ever. Just click my URL to ‘Czech’ it out.

  5. btw.. the bridesmaids are kinda hot too~~ bet u’v got some of their contacts, huh?? u notti notti KS~~

  6. congrats pierre and laysee for their wedding. the couple was together since high school. 🙂
    and glad that u enjoyed your trip in melaka! 🙂

  7. the Brand Manager is also the Mamee’s big boss’s son. I heard of this wedding some time ago, never knew u actually were there.
    I saw the word Mamee and Melaka, i definitely knew about this wedding as one of the wedding planner is my friend.

  8. it’s quite depressing when you’re in your late 20’s and your friend starts to get married while you’re single. Hahaha. Good thing I am only 22 now. Still got a few years before I start having invitations for wedding. Hahaha. Hopefully by then i wont be single or smtg. LOL. =D

  9. I’m sure that hurt like hell. I can imagine your hundreds of leg hair being pulled at a time. Ouch.
    Can I be invited for your wedding? I’d love to have kolo mee! haha =p

  10. Gosh, what a small world. .. Melvin here, I was emcee-ing Kim Ong’s wedding.
    Pierre’s family are actually my family friends. The last time I saw Pierre, he was in primary school, and him and his siblings would be in my house for private tuition with me dad.
    The next time you see Pierre, do tell him I said hello ..

  11. saw u at chicken rice ball shop! then i thought melaka is so small tat i can actually bumped into a kuching-ian! anyways, nice blog! romantic wedding!

  12. I know them! The girl is my senior in school! Very happy to see them tying the knot! They’ve been dating like forever! Congrats to Pierre and Lay See! 😀

  13. “Next time I marry, I’m gonna serve Kuching kolo mee, Sarawak laksa and 3-layer Teh-C-special.” — haha!! good idea!!

  14. aiya! at least they didnt wax your chest ma! melaka sushi.. wth -__- but the old man was damn funny weh! laugh 2 mintues non-stop wtf

  15. by looking at some of the clues, the plates, table and chicken..i know u went to the best chicken rice ball in town. 🙂

  16. Ngaiti…all went so horrible…
    Leg-waxing…sayangla..those bulu legss..
    Wasabi gardenia…’Sensual’ Moments..
    ONe pile of Rib crushin’ scene..:O
    Apek singing hokkien gua wif ‘ump!’ at wedding reception to pia jia eh yia sejajar wif the TNB motto…@o@!!!

  17. damnit Kenny, i’m a Melakan away from home and missing chicken rice ball so much D:
    you gotta hand it to the bridesmaids for being so creative though… 🙂

  18. The “kissing” bewteen guys as if so used to be happenned nowadays among my friends too.. asp truth or dare game.. the bursting balloon with the crotch made me lmao!!!! I am so going to remebr this game… to be used in future 🙂
    *wax stripping…felt so awful for some “forest” woots. LOL

  19. being a brother/heng dai/xiong di in a wedding really so big sacrifice!!
    i asked a few guys do they willing to wax the leg hair off for their brother during wedding or not? their answer are NO! =_________=”

  20. Hey Kenny, Sheba here. We met during the wedding.
    I think you forgot to mention the Mamee Monster Bride and Groom. They stole the limelight away from Pierre and Lay See!

  21. being brothers have to take the torture!.
    we have to eat grapes hung infront of the grooms crotch.
    brokeback mountain too..

  22. hi kenny,
    you really cheer up my monday blue.
    know what, in any chinese wedding ceremony, the most exciting and anticipated part is when brothers being tortured by sisters.

  23. OHHH!!! U went for Piere & Poh Lay See’s wedding??!!! Anyway, they are one long and loyal couple…CONGRATS to BOTH of YOU~

  24. Hi Kenny,
    This entry is really funny and enjoyable. What a waste if you don’t settle down yourself. Seriously, you are smart with an enormous sense of humour. I wish my hubby has got your kind of humor!
    Keep it up Kenny!

  25. Looking at the view of Bunga Raya… you stayed at Rennaissance (not sure if it’s the right spelling)?
    Now you’re making me hungry for my hometown food =(

  26. The bridesmaids were indeed ‘creative’. This will never happen in my wedding & if it ever did happen ….
    Anyway, i’m very sure if the bros would to hold their stand, the bridesmaids will definitely relent ‘cos the bride still needs to get married right?
    Then again, it’s love that makes men do ‘silly’ things at will. 🙂

  27. Glad you had fun during the wedding.
    I am just a random reader 🙂
    Anyways, just a thought. It’s fine when he (big shot, rich guy) serves Hainanese chicken rice during a wedding dinner. But what if a poor, but also proud Hainanese wants to serve chicken rice? Isn’t it a different situation then. It’s not because he’s proud then. What crosses people’s mind will be poor guy being frugal using Hainanese descent as a cover.

  28. i tot malaysian chinese similar to indonesian chinese…just found recently, its really different.
    sadly we don’t have ‘brothers being tortured by sisters’ wedding tradition… it’s gonna be fun! haha

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