There are generally two types of restaurants and food courts here in Kuching.
The first type are the ones that play safe go along with conventional names. These are places like Siang Siang Food Court or Rock Road Restaurant, where there’s nothing exceptionally fancy nor memorable about their names.
And then there are ones that have gone the extra mile when it comes to naming themselves. In fact, they’ve gone so much past the extra mile that we have to scratch our heads and wonder, “How the heck do they come up with a name like THAT?”
Today, kennysia.com pays tribute to these restaurant and food court names, the ones that do not stick to the convention and the ones that simply does not make any sense. Presenting, the Top 5 Weirdest Restaurant and Food Court Names In Kuching.
1. Thank Food Restaurant
The Chinese name of this restaurant is pronounced “Thian Fook”. But for some weird reason, it’s English name is translated into “Thank Food”.
Some people, when they feel a sense of relief, they say “Thank God!” or “Thank Goodness!”
This restaurant says “Thank Food!”
2. Da Light Food Court
The Chinese pronounciation of the name of this food court is Da Lai. Like the previous one, the English name is nothing like its Chinese pronounciation.
Maybe they have their own reasons why they don’t have a matching English name.
Da means “Big”. Lai means “Come”. So the name Da Lai can be literally translated into English as “Big Come”.
That is really unfortunate, because the term “Big Come” is equivalent in meaning to “Heavy Orgasm”.
For example, “Julie slept with a 9 inch Russian. She had so much fun, she had a Big Come.”
Maybe that’s why the owners of this food court decided to call it Da Light. Maybe what they really meant was, “Hey, other food courts suck. Come eat here and eat, and you will see DA LIGHT!”
3. Handsome Court
I know when you wanna give a name to your business, you’d normally want to name it something good. That’s alright. Nothing wrong with calling your business some praise-worthy names like “Siang Siang” or “Expert” food courts.
But to call yourself a handsome food court just smacks full of arrogance.
What next? “Leng Chai” laksa and “Chio Bu” curry? Please, if you were that handsome, you wouldn’t be opening a food court.
Sounds like what Steven Lim would call it if he opens a food court.
4. Food Some Place Restaurant
On the opposite end of Handsome Food Court, is a restaurant that suffers from major memory issues.
I can imagine myself walking into this restaurant and having this conversation with the waitress.
Kenny: I’d like to order some food.
*Ten minutes later*
Kenny: Where’s the food?
Waitress: Food some place.
Waitress: … Food some place lah!
Kenny: Where is my food?!
Waitress: Don’t know! Your food some place!
5. Ho Say Liao Food Court
Here is one food court that is proud of its Hokkien.
We don’t get a lot of food courts here named in Hokkien, which is sad because most Kuching folks speak the dialect.
I guess part of the problem is that there aren’t a lot of nice words in Hokkien that you could name your business after. I mean, a place called Lim Peh Food Court or Tu Lan Restaurant probably isn’t gonna attract much business.
Wait, I spoke too soon.
Believe it or not, THERE IS actually a place called TU LAN RESTAURANT!
I swear this is not photoshopped. It is a 100% real restaurant in San Francisco and they serve Vietnamese food.
What an unfortunate name.
This is funny. Our politicians can not only rap, they can put up a good fight too.
As in, real physical fights with punches and kicks involved. That sure is something to look up to.
i’ll eat at tu lan..
oh wow… first time i read our blog when there are not yet any comments.. haha…
miss kuching food courts.. ahaha
HAHA tulan! the waitresses there must be pissed all the time!
made me lol all the way esp. the last part… good read.
Maybe another restaurant call tua lan opposite tu lan
wonder what would be the expression of the owner of the Vietnamese restaurant after knowing what it means in Hokkien..haha
Eating at Tu Lan restaurant must make you very tulan. Hence the name. XD
LOL at the last food shop!:p
Of course, another reason why “Da Light” restaurant did not translate directly from its Chinese maybe it does not want to be associated with the venerable head of Tibetan monks, especially when sinful gobs of meat and booze are involved!
Well, instead of “tua lan” maybe got lan pa…
Waaah, Ill so eat at Tu Lan.
I go there right now *rushes to San Francisco*
Wah. All the ppl there damn tulan haa? lol
sorry.. typo for my first comment… *your.. hahaha..
HAHAS! There’s SOOOO funny! (:
Hahaha,yes you’re absolutely right abt how Steven Lim’s foodcourt wood look like 😛
FYI.. Tu Lan in San Francisco does not look like much, but is probably the most famous and best Vietnamese restaurant in San Francisco. And people here know good food (-:
Even Emeril Lagasse (popular cook in US) eats at Tu Lan when he visits and had the owner on his TV show in the past.
Hey Kenny check out this freight company with a cool name from Singapore:
Cool name huh!
What unique food courts!
Can someone tell me what ‘Ho say liao’ means?
Because I can’t understand hokkien.
I seen and been to almost all those weird name restaurants in Kuching. Haha! but didn’t realise they are funny until u mentioned it. LOL … hehe!! 😀
heheh.. for the first 2 names, I think they came out with the name cuz:-
1. Thank Food – cuz’ Chinese pronounce Thank You as Thien Kiu. So hence.. Thien is spelt as Thank and Thank is pronounce as Thien :p
2. Da-Light – also cuz’ Chinese pronounce Light as Lai. eg. off the ‘lai’ please. So.. same thing.. Light is pronounce as Lai and Lai is spelt as Light.
make sense? :p
If I were to open a restaurant named with the Hokkien dialect, I would call it ‘Cin Chai’. My business would be damn good as 9 out of 10 times you ask your lunch partners where to eat, their answer is ‘Cin Chai’. 😀
I LOL’d very hard at the Steven Lim food court… What if it really does happen? argh!! kenot eat my food in peace edi… XD
I like this blog set. Made me hunger for good ol’ Kuching food. Fish…..
Need my coke and kolo mee plus…..laksa, can’t wait to go home and eat all them goodies…
This is bloody depressing, Kenny, gonna find you and stuff you full of Sprite…
I wonder the food ordered at the restaurants, have wonderful names or not…Sure will attract alot of customers with abit of creativity…8D~
Hmm, “Mount Everest Snowey Mountain Ice Kacang”, “Pacific Ocean Lobster Giant Tuna King Crab Seafood Char Kuey Teow” and an “Ancient Cavemen Dinosaur Meat Chicken Chop” will do me fine~ hehe~
Hey dude, Cool, you got the picture….my lazy ass sis.
I saw some of those shops in kuching but what does Tu Lan means in Vietnamese????? Anyone knows??
This is soooooo weird..
Hey, who says weird name cant attract much business?? I think that’s their business strategies la! Haha..so that’s why, you remember them so well, see!!
jiak bah bah will be a nice name too.. :p
i think really kuching onli got this canggih names wor..havent seen any funny 1s yet in KL though..
i have always wanted to visit the kittyland myself after reading your blog for the past few months. but now…another good reason to go soon. name spotting!
ooo…imagine a spa call matispa! no kidding…saw it in tokyo. would you? link
If I were to open a kopitiam english name is BLUEBIRD, I want to use hokkien name or mandarin name better?
damn lame entry
Some of you said the boss and waiters in the restaurant must be very tu lan. I think it is true because if you see the picture again, there’s a white sign under the green awning saying ‘Tu Lan Vietnamese.’ Warning the customer before entering the their place, I guess.
hahahha…chio bu curry..wtf ^^
Haha good one. XD
Much better than the previous post. McHostage, Kenny? *raised eyebrows*
holy sh… pls find if theres any chee-bee restaurant?
I think the ‘Shop Samll Two’ Restaurant at 4 1/2 miles is a funny name too.
Sorry I mean Shop Small Two
Hahaha.well all the more reason for me to visit kuching. =)
‘GU LAN’ nice name.lol
hahaha.. the make-believe some food place convo had me laughing out loud..
lol…i’ve came across a restaurant called restoran jangan ketawa” in KL!!!check it out…
Lol..if s’pore slogan called them ‘UNIQUELY SINGAPORE’,India-‘INCREDIBLE INDIA’,thai-‘AMAZING THAILAND’.so,due to sarawak have had specials and creatives food outlet names we call it ‘FANTASTIC SARAWAK’ ha..ha..
dont go to TA LAI the floor and table so dirty.
maybe there is another meaning for tulan in vietnamese…who knows
HAHAHAHAHAHHAHA “Sounds like what Steven Lim would call it if he opens a food court.”
you know there is also a place called ‘verinice restaurant’ (or sumthin of that nature) in kuching.
theres weird names like Big Mouth, Big Thumb, Day Dream too..
nice post. =)
ROFL! TULAN XP
not bad at all kenny you walk all over kuching i see hehe any where have a nice day at sg
see ya jeremiah here
Talking about names, how weird is Love Child Care Center?
Love Child Care Center is weird? What’s so weird about that?
I think Thank Food Vegetarian should have been Thank Vegetarian Food, if Thank was a name that is. As for Food Some Place, it beats me completely
hahaha kenny u r funny…. love ur posts man
I WANDER HOW THE FOOD IS LIKE IN TU LAN RESTAURANT!!!HAVE A NICE DAY!
oh my god i dont even want to know what they serve in Tu Lan Restaurant!
“Julie slept with a 9 inch Russian.”
Happy Belated Birthday buddy. Loved the 24 List. I always live vicariously through you anyways 😉
tulan… i open a competing store next to it “TU GAO LAN”
quite amazed by how they crack their heads to think of an english name that’s not too bad and rhyms with the chinese name….hahaa…
‘Ho say liao’..sounds like ‘can die already’to me XD
LMAO the picture with steven lim puhahahaha!you made my day kenny
Nice to see you! you wan the pic that i taken with u? mail me or tag me! =D
have a nice day!
I miss kch stalls.
I think the restaurant owners and bloggers have something in common. Or may be they are the same person…. There are bloggers who name their blogs as such too.
The initial name of the Thank Food Restaurant was actually Thian Food but apparently that particularly name (Thian Food) had been registered under a different business.
But hey, without food ppl starve. So why don’t we “Thank” Food!!
omg…. steven lim is gross… i never hate anyone online before… but steven lim~~
that tu lan restaurant really funny…Any CB restaurant??all i know is got CB biscuit…
Kenny you missed out “uncle restaurant”, “aunty restaurant” and “brother restaurant” in kuching. I forgot the exact locations since its been years I went there. If my memories serves me right, there is also a “grandma/grandpa restaurant” and “sister restaurant”, LOL. One of these is located in the saberkas area, the other is located at an old street near the place where they have kuching fest yearly. Didnt manage to see any papa or mama restaurant though. Was hoping I could come across the entire family restaurants during my stay in kuching =P
bn sucks…policticians in bn are farking retarded and is dead brain bollocks.vote for opposition!dap,pkr,pas…hindraf?!?!
kennysial, wonder why u alwes criticise eh? those people slap n beat u b4 eh?
haha … what a post … school is so stressful that i think i don’t mind paying a visit to tu lan restaurant … how about a menu there!
There are some spelling mistake, “pronounciation”, it should be “pronunciation”
haha. interesting and farnie!! in singapore, we have a coffee shop named “Broadway” in Potong Pasir. it’s a direct translation from the chinese name, Da Lu. haha!
just..when i need a good laugh..Bhwaahaha
I came across this website which allows blogger-readers / reader-reader to chat (voice conference).. http://mashable.com/2007/03/28/talkr/
The Chinese-English translation of UT-Ways is damn funny 😛
I found one! It’s called the Gaucho GrilL! xD I’ve got a picture even.
I can verify that that ‘Tu Lan’ restaurant is real cos I was just in San Fran and I saw it! Ha ha ha
very wierd but funny at the same time!
Well…S’pore has a Jap restaurant called TAMADE. I think it’s a close fight with the TuLan rest..heh heh
you should also uincludes restaurant like nyonya bites, curry leaf, lemon grass, fat cat, big eat, opium den, penrissen point
u guyz forgot GAMELAN. Haha the indonesian restaurant behind RHB simpang tiga. Tho the food is good.
A:today eat wat?
B:let’s go Tu Lan~
this post kept me laughing ,myself silly!
Da Lai? Big Come? You mean ‘Big Cum’?
When I went to San Francisco, I pass by TU LAN viet resto and I took the same photo. I was thinking W T F? hahahhaha
1. Lunch Yao Restaurant
2. Cheap Buy Restaurant
3. Lamp Park Restaurant
Wow… I live near SF bay area but never visit Tu Lan restaurant before, maybe I’ll reserved this for some rainy day…
I like reading all the comments. Making me laugh and making my day!!!
Oh yea kenny… Keep up all the good info updates. I guess it’s one of the best ways to get to know Kuching a little better and to promote visit kuching year 2008. HaHaHa…
PS: Your articles and pictures cheer my day…
Have you heard of a restaurant situated at BDC called ‘kedai mana lagi’. I know it sounds lame but their foods are nice though.
If it is nice then people probably would like to try it. Good way of promoting and advertising.
miss the kuching LAKSA!
u kuching-ians are the best lah. all the cool retarded names/
eh wait. im kuching-ian too >_>
Lan Jiao restaurant
kolo mee is the best
I have a friend named Kum Lan when I was in Primary 3. No kidding.
I saw Ho say liao when i was in kch! i instantly tot of you!
U guys know there`s another shop jz on the other side of bdc shophouse phase2? If u know the “half” church, then u know the place.. Right in front of the “half” church, there`s 1 restaurant. Its call “bai jia le”(hundred house happy) but the english name for it is “pai jia le”(very the pai jia).. Check it out~
u knw what, Im Vietnamese. In my language, Tú Lan is a personal name and its has meanings in Vietnamese.
1st time I read it, I already guessed it is a Vietnamese restaurant 🙂
Thanks For Sharing.