Fortune Telling Can Sound Quite Wrong Too

Spotted at the Amarin Heavenly Thai restaurant at Midvalley Megamall, KL.

The nice restaurant has kindly provided astrological readings of one of the 12 Chinese zodiac signs, printed on their paper mats on table. This month’s sign is… The Cock.
And somehow, everything just sounded so wrong.
Possible scenario.
Girl 1: “So why did you break up with your boyfriend?”
Girl 2: “Oh. I consulted a Chinese fortune teller and he told me that we’re not really that compatible.”
Girl 1: “How come?”
Girl 2: “See, I told him my boyfriend is born in 1981. Immediately, the fortune teller said he’s a cock.”
Girl 1: “That’s not good.”
Girl 2: “Then I told him my boyfriend is born on a Tuesday. So he said he’s a fighting cock.”
Girl 1: “No wonder you two always argue.”
Girl 2: “Yalah. Finally I told him my boyfriend is born in September. And he said…”
Girl 1: “Said what?”
Girl 2: “He said my boyfriend’s a soft iron cock!” 🙁
Girl 1: !!!

There’s this new chill out joint in Mont Kiara that’s looking for some fun-loving waitstaff and bartenders to join their team. Interested? Call Agnes at 0126865030.

48 Replies to “Fortune Telling Can Sound Quite Wrong Too”

  1. “A Cock Picking Food Underneath People’s Home” is “High-Quality Iron”?
    How the heck do Feng Shui masters make up stuff like these?

  2. kenny…I think u got addicted with fortune teller kinda of stuff…btw, are u in kl now? dun forget take some hot chick’s pic and show us…

  3. Greetings from the United States. The strength of my curiosity got the hold on me.
    Kenny, as impolite as it is, I have to ask, how much does your blog earn ? It’s quite rare for a malaysian blog to have so much traffic.
    I’m earning about USD 5000 per month at the moment with my new blog. But there is room for improvement. I see a hidden potential for malaysia. Unusually high blog readers.
    It’s a honest question. Feel free not to answer if you don’t want to.
    But if you fear readers will leave and think you’re somehow robbing their moneh*, you’re dead wrong.
    You’re just writing what you like and you’re being rewarded because people like the things you write.
    People don’t need to come and read your blog if they don’t want to. But they do. So it’s okay to tell me how much your blog earns if you don’t mind. Unless.. you truly fear that your readers will leave your blog ?
    No more girls to cry for you ?
    Come on……. it’s an honest question.
    Damn, I’m such a curious asshole……..!!! >:D

  4. wei kenny! im an iron cock too! LOL. Why cant they just use the word “rooster” instead of “cock”???
    Anyway, this cock not stupid. RESPECT THIS COCK! LOL
    P.S. Happy Deepavali to everyone.

  5. I’m born in 1983. Thus making me a “Pig” not a “Boar”.
    I bet in the menu, they refer “Rat” as “Mouse”, “Ox” as “Cow” lor.

  6. Kenny, a number of your readers are really stupid and never learn to appreciate Chinese Feng Shui. Ironically, most of them are Chinese. They though they are clever enuf by saying “Feng Shui limit us psychologically” etc etc. I knew many people of this kind. None of them can be considered successful coz they always have out standing bills in their credit cards (they always work their shit out for the banks).
    I take feng Shui as a guide and it will never limit my creativity. Feng Shui really works for me. Atleast I never face financial problem like them.
    Again, soft iron, cast iron, high-quality iron are refered to type of iron that suit the ROOSTER person (To all the idiots out there, what I mean here ‘Rooster Astrology Sign’ and not mean that person is a rooster OK?!)
    For those who believe,
    Cast iron = alloy type metal.
    High-quality iron = expensive iron like gold and platinum.
    Soft iron = non magnetic metals.

  7. Greetings from Singapore,
    kenny, thanks to your links, i’ve gotten so much blog traffic i clinched a deal with a company and another advertising contract with an online clothing company who wants me to model their catalouge as well.
    It works out to be a mere USD10K/yr at the moment with my new blog. But there is room for lots of improvement.
    But if you fear readers will leave your blog for mine, you’re right!
    People don’t need to come and read your blog if they don’t want to.
    I’m just writing what i like and i’m being rewarded because people like the things i write.
    So it’s okay to tell you how much my blog earns if you don’t mind.
    Unless.. you truly fear that your readers will leave your blog ?
    I hope, as a girl, i didnt make you cry?
    Come on……. i’m just being honest.
    Damn, I’m such a bitch……..!!!
    U know i love u lots kenny! i still havent licked your teeth!

  8. y are there weird ppl leaving comments saying bout earning money etc.. -.- copy and pasted summore.. to that particular person who imitate mia (or maybe it IS her.. lolxxx) if u reli wanna sabotage readers, sigh, at least put some effort into it.. damn pathetic..

  9. cuckoooo….
    cock is a nice animal…
    but i still like rabbits more…
    there’s 2 cocks in my family and 1 of them is soft cock like what u said…haha…SOFT…
    *evil laugh*

  10. Why the hell is Mia copying Roy’s comments ? I thought she was original……
    I’m also a reader who’s wondering how much kenny earns from this blog.
    Like Roy… I’m also a curious asshole kenny !!

  11. wtf man…
    mia is copying roy’s comment as sarcasm la, isn’t it obvious???
    and wat’s wif this roy guy? if u wanna noe abt kenny’s income, u shd ask by IM or sth… purposely ask in the comment box, wanna make a scene? or want everybody to know how much u earn?
    i dun think you r a curious asshole,roy…
    i think ur juz an asshole… no offense… =p

  12. Read your ‘Perth’ post, and I know how you feel.
    I face a lot of conflict everyday just trying to decide to stay here or go back.
    So many pros and cons, and I figured if I did go back I’d probabaly be able to make something more of myself.
    Oh and the eating healthier thing? Yep, agree heaps!! It’s deffo true, & I keep going on abt it I think my mum is getting sick hearing it. hehe.
    And I miss Perth heaps.
    But… I hate winter, I hate the rain, and I’ll miss KL like mad when I’m there, as I’ve done before.
    I’ll miss my family, my friends…
    Decision Dilemma.
    It’s a win-win & lose-lose situation all at the same time.

  13. Feng Shui Believer,
    If Feng Shui works for you, fine. If it’s your personal belief in Feng Shui that makes you as what you are today, good for you. If some people who are skeptical, let them be. Does that mean that they will always be less succussful? Does that makes them poor and always in financial difficulty? What facts and figures can you prove to me? Try proving your facts and figures to me, and I will be prove mine.
    Failure to do so only goes to prove your stupidity of your sweeping statements of your belief.

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