Prepaid Wars Episode II: Attack Of The Handphones

Previously, I wrote about the outrageous battles of publicity between our three telco operators.

It is a never-ending war that has conquered almost every single aspect of our lives. From newspapers, to TV, to the Internet, to cinemas, to billboards, to even the lamp posts on our streets, it is becoming almost impossible to get through a single day without encountering an ad for either one of Maxis, Digi or Celcom.
In a war where everyone is claiming they are the best, who exactly is the best?

No one seems to have a definite answer.
Which is why I decided that is gonna do something good for the people, and put an end to this bitter rivalry, once and for all.

I am a Celcom Postpaid user, which makes me somewhat of a neutral observer in this war between Prepaids. I am not endorsing anyone. In fact I have little to gain even if Xpax decided to grace me with sponsorship, simply because I have a phone allowance and my bills are already taken care of by my employer. Besides, it’s just too much of a hassle for me to switch numbers.
In the interest of finding out which telco has the better prepaid plan, I purchased four different SIM packs over the Christmas break. After extensive research, sleepless nights and countless cups of caffeine, I am putting Maxis Hotlink, Digi Prepaid and Celcom Xpax in the ring for a head-to-head triple threat, round-of-six prizefight.

And here are the results.
Round 1: The Cheapskate User
You are a cheapskate user if you own a phone mainly to let people call you.

You’re not the kind who make a lot of phone calls yourself. When you do, it’s just to say “Ma, I finish school already. Come pick me up liaw.” or “Ah boy ah, are you coming home to eat tonight?” If you wanna talk for longer, you’ll probably do that bloody annoying thing of making a miss call, then expect the person to call you back.
Sounds familiar? Then cheapskates like you should be looking at the low usage plans by the three operators on offer.

Call rates between the three are very similar. But the difference-maker here is that Hotlink’s credits last longer and expire later.
Say you spend RM15 a month, a RM30 reload would last you 2 whole months on Hotlink, compared to just 1 month on either Celcom or Digi. That makes Hotlink’s Easy Plan the clear winner this round.

Round 2: The Interstate Lover
You are an Interstate Lover if you often call to numbers all throughout Malaysia.

You don’t have a lot of friends locally, which is why you have to always call outstation to harrass people from another state. Most people would find you a freaking weirdo, because unless you’re a businessman how often do you make phone calls to people from another state?

Digi’s one flat rate nationwide comes in handy here. The only time Digi is more expensive is if you call outstation Celcom numbers extensively. Xpax would turn out cheaper in that case since you don’t have to wait till you hit RM30 a month to get 38c/min.

Round 3: The Clique Member
You are a Clique Member if you and your friends are like The Stellars. Or EPL football players.

Everything you do, die die must do together.
You go out for lunch together, you pose for the cameras together, you wear the same clothes together. Heck, you probably even share the same boyfriends together. (Ewww…)
In which case, I’m sure you have no problems sharing the same telco together.

If you and your bunch of friends are shopping for new prepaid lines together, Xpax is best.
All three telcos offer special low rates for your list of special numbers. But Hotlink Total’s Activ5 and Digi’s F&F only allow numbers belonging to their own network to be on the list.
With Xpax’s 8pax, you can add not just Celcom numbers but also TM fixed lines to the list and enjoy the low rates for up to eight assigned numbers. It’s a cool deal that even Hotlink’s super cheap 10c/min off-peak dwarfs in comparison.

With each of our big three neck-and-neck with three points each under their belt, just who will emerge victorious as the winner in the battle of prepaids?

Create polls and vote for free.
Stay tuned for the conclusion, in the next episode of… Prepaid Wars!

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It’s hard to believe, but exactly two years ago I started without much of an expectation that it would turn into a monster that it is today.

A lot of things has happened since I wrote my first entry.
For one, my site’s traffic has skyrocketed from to 16,000 a day. As of posting, is still the number 1 Malaysian blog on Technorati.
The best thing about that is the fame and recognition that comes with it. Whether in Kuching or KL, going out and being recognised by strangers is becoming pretty common.

Top 4 Most Commented Entries On
13 October – Kuching Vs Perth Dilemma – 539 Comments
27 August – Crocs Beach Review And Giveaway – 396 Comments
8 March 2006 – Kuala Lumpur International Marathon– 394 Comments
17 October – LG White Chocolate Fashion Phone Giveaway – 383 Comments

What I appreciate most about writing here is when my readers see good stuff on my site, they spread the word around telling other people to read Some of my entries this past year was elevated to legendary status because of that.
Top 4 Most Memorable Entries On
14 January – Weight Loss Ads Are Ridiculous

I sent a letter to Osim demanding explanation why their ads for their weight loss products always feature skinny models who don’t need to lose weight. Hilarity ensued.
Despite efforts from my readers bombarding Osim headquarters with forwarded copies of this entry, Osim’s PR department launched into full defence mode and ignored all those forwarded emails. Word finally got around to Channel [V] studios and in support of my cause, I was even featured in their first episode of Poparazzi. The channel called up Osim to seek for a reply. As expected, Osim said “No comment.”

1 April – Kenny Sia Attempts To Write A Bimbo Blog

It’s becoming an April Fool’s tradition for to poke fun at Xiaxue, and last year it’s no different.
If there’s one thing I know about how to easily increase blog traffic, it’s to talk about Wendy Cheng – the funny, controversial, bimbotic, bitchy internet celebrity from Singapore. Love her or hate her, people are just dying for a chance to talk about her.
It’s simple, Xiaxue = Traffic.

14 June – How To Make Your Own Official World Cup Ball

This is another one of those entries that made people keep forwarding it until it made the trip around the world in people’s email inboxes. Like what happened when I poked fun at Osim, the entry reached the office of adidas Malaysia. Unlike Osim, adidas had a bit more sense of humour and sent me a pack of gifts as appreciation. Thanks!
However, things unexpectedly turned sour when the president of the Bespectacled Losers Association of Bloggers ‘Blogging Responsibly’ (BLABBR) for no reason at all accused me of plagiarising this entry. I was bemused because I didn’t plagiarise and I know it. Surprisingly, when I put out all the glaring facts in front of him and pointed out the differences between “plagiarism” and “coincidence”, he got nothing to say.
Hypocrites can go suck on it baby.

4 July – Another Fight Video Discovered On The Internet>
My parody of the
Miri Schoolgirl Fight video that was widely circulated around the internet. This is definitely my favourite self-made video clip ever.
As of writing, the video was viewed 103,800 times around the world and even made it to Youtube’s Top #11 Most Viewed Video Clip during the week that it was published. Not bad for a Kuching-made content. It could’ve been more if that week wasn’t overshadowed by Zidane’s headbutt on Youtube.

As the popularity of my site climbs, I am also beginning to receive more and more offers from commercial entities to advertise their products on my blog. The most obvious examples of which are Pixart, LG Chocolate and Crocs Shoes.
I apologise if my readers felt annoyed that their regular blog reading is invaded by adverts, but running a high traffic website isn’t exactly cheap. On average, I am spending at least RM300 a month and 2 hours a day on It is unfair if I have to spend time and money out of my own pocket to run a website for people to read, and yet not get anything in return to cover my expenses.

Adverts on blogs are fine as long as they’re done in moderation. 1 ad out of 10 entries isn’t exactly that bad. Besides, TV shows like Idol have a lot more ads than, and it’s not like people are switching their TV sets off in protest.
I welcome adverts on blogs, and I think it is a good thing that Malaysian companies are turning towards bloggers to spread the word about their products. The fact that companies are now willing to invest in online media is a sign that our locally-produced Internet content is getting better. That being said, my promise to you is that I will never sacrifice the user-friendliness for cash and I will never tell blatant lies for money.

The second year of my blogging journey saw some changes in my writing. I think that as I grow up, it is inevitable that my writing matures along with it. Blog readers who have been around for a while would notice that I have toned down my brash style considerably. I’m also staying away from large blog communities, becoming less controversial and updating less often compared to before.

There’s a few reasons for that.
The first and foremost of which is that I think internet wars are extremely stupid. Even worse if it is initiated by people who don’t even know you and yet want to control what you write. Trolls are most annoying when they repeat themselves like a broken record, acting like the High Priest of the Church of Morality telling me “With Great Power Comes Great Responsibility!™” and “Think Before You Click That Publish Button!™”
Fine then. That’s why I’m updating less because I think too much before clicking that Publish button. Happy now?

Despite toning down so much, I STILL get idiots going after my ass because they think some of my entries are too ‘controversial’. Some even had the rudeness and audacity to tell me “better delete this entry otherwise ISA go after you”.
When I get comments like that, I just delete them immediately. I don’t care. I couldn’t care less about the Internal Security Act. People who wanna control how I blog should worry less about the ISA and worry more about getting their comments deleted by SIA.
SIA, as in… Kenny
SIA, y’know?

Judge for yourself and tell me if you think these entries are offensive and shouldn’t be put up at all.
Top 5 Most ‘Controversial’ Entries On
13 March – Datuk Application Form
It’s an open secret that many Datuks are not worthy of their titles. I poked fun at that. People said I’m controversial and wanted me to remove this entry.

8 May – Kuching Traffic Police Is My Best Friend

Bribing the traffic police in Malaysia is like buying pirated DVDs – everyone knows that it’s not legal but everyone does it anyway, simply because the authorities are giving you all the avenues to. Try doing the same in Singapore, Australia or New Zealand and you wouldn’t go far.
The purpose of this entry is to demonstrate how freaking easy it is for the average Malaysian to get out of a traffic offence with some spare change. I was trying to insult police corruption in my own sarcastic way, but people got angry because they think I am advocating bribery. I am not.

10 May – Sarawak Erections Update

I poked fun at the pre-election situation in Sarawak without siding any political parties. People said I’m controversial and wanted me to remove this entry.

25 May – Zhng My Penis

I posted an entry about circumcision. My mom wanted me to remove it (the entry, not the foreskin).
She thinks that anything to do with the human penis should not be talked about at all. I’m not even talking about the penis in a rude sense, so why is it perfectly acceptable to talk about circumcision during biology classes in high school and not on my blog?
Like they care. I was still dragged into the room and disciplined at length because of this entry.

15 September – A Vote Of No Confidence

Look guys, it’s just a badly photoshopped animation of the Tun clicking a mouse. That’s all. Like that also cannot put up? Must remove ah?

One thing I am beginning to become mindful of is the amount of influence I have on kids.
When I started, most of my readers are people 20 years and above, so I exaggerate myself and blog without any form of self-restriction. Of late, I noticed an increasing number high school teenagers reading Some even found out about my site after their teachers told them about it. When and Mix FM plugged my site over the air, they described it as “appropriate for kids”. Then there are parents who sent me messages telling me how much their 15-year-olds enjoy reading

Seriously, I didn’t use to think kids should read my site because I never intended to become anyone’s role model. In fact, I hated the thought of becoming a goody-2-shoe moral crusader.
Yet at the same time, it is flattering to know that teachers and parents are putting their faith in me. With that in mind, I reluctantly scaled back on inappropriate language and R-rated content on my site. Sure, it meant me losing a bit of my edge. But I guess it’s better lose that than to have the next 15-year-old say ‘KNNCCB’ to their parents after picking up a new vocabulary reading

Top 4 Personal Favourites On
20 January – Best of Kuching Series
4 May – It’s Been A Year Since You’re Gone
8 September – Close One Eye
6 February – Because Good Girls Like Bad Boys

So this is it.
For me, running is a fine balancing act between staying true to myself, providing entertaining content, documenting my own life, keeping it financially viable, being socially responsible and having a laugh while at it.
It is not easy to satisfy 16,000 readers everyday, but thank you for sticking with me through the thicks and thins for the past 2 years.
Any comments? Suggestions? Favourite entries? Worst entries? I welcome all kinds of opinion, so let me know. 🙂

Just don’t tell me to remove this entry because of ISA.

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2007 New Years Resolution

This time last year, I made myself a list of resolutions I hoped to achieve by the end of 2006.
Now that the year is over and a new one has arrived, it’s time to reflect on those resolutions I made. Let’s look at how well I did.

Resolution #1: Drink less alcohol.
A friend of mine once claimed he only drinks on three days. Those three days are yesterday, today and tomorrow.
There’s only two times last year when I managed to get myself so drunk to the point of needing people to send me home. But now, I limit my drinking days to just Saturdays so I’m pretty far from my friend’s philosophy. Overall, I’m drinking a lot less alcohol and keeping things in moderation.
Verdict: PASS

Resolution #2: Cuss less and avoid commenting on religion in
There’s a reason why you don’t see a lot of of f-words and stuff that would make people burn down buildings on this blog anymore.
Verdict: PASS

Resolution #3: Visit Singapore more often.
Ended up visiting Singapore only twice in the entire year. Not sure what happened there, but I think I’m more wanted in KL as compared to Singapore.
Verdict: FAIL

Resolution #4: Put 50% of my monthly income into savings, unless I’m travelling.
Failed. Failed big time. As it turns out, I travelled out of Kuching almost every month. Sometimes I did it even twice a month.
The whole 2006 I ended putting only 10% of my monthly income into savings – hardly enough to make a difference.
Verdict: FAIL

Resolution #5: Lose 10kg.
I wanted to lose 10. I lost 8. Short by 2.
Verdict: FAIL

Ah well. All in all, I kinda sucked when it comes to my 2006 resolutions. Maybe I’ll have better results this year.
So, let it be known that before the end of 2007, I want to:

Resolution #1: Achieve a savings equivalent to 5 months worth of my salary
This one is to replace my doomed resolution of putting half my monthly salary into savings. I still think saving money is a virtue I should pick up while I’m still young.

Resolution #2: Gamble less
Gambling is fine if played in moderation, but I always get carried away. Sometimes I play harder and harder trying to “win back” money that I’ve lost. That’s not a good thing.
I’m no compulsive gambler but I stupidly lost about RM600 last year gambling on the stupid World Cup thanks to that stupid France and that stupid Zidane headbutt. Altogether I lost a stupid RM2,000 placing stupid bets on stupid games.
I’m still gonna gamble lah but from now onwards, I’m gonna stop playing when I hit my limit of RM100 a game.

Resolution #3: Raise funds for charity
Shhh… don’t tell this to anyone.
Actually, last year I was thinking of staging a major publicity stunt by circumcising and auctioning off my dick’s foreskin to raise funds for charity. But my family kicked up a big fuss when I wrote about circumcision on my blog, so obviously I had to abandon that idea. Besides, who’s gonna buy my foreskin?
Still, cancer prevention and care is something very close to my heart. I need time to plan, but I hope to initiate some sort of a campaign and do something positive to benefit the cancer societies.

Resolution #4: Get out of bed by 7:30am every weekday
When you mix around with nocturnals, you turn into a nocturnal yourself. Most of my close friends don’t have day jobs so they can afford to go to bed at 3am every night.
I blindly follow their sleeping patterns so when morning comes I become dead like zombie. Gotta wake up early.

Resolution #5: Learn a new sport
A friend gave me a complete set of golf clubs last March, but nine months later I still swing like an monkey trying to scratch its butt. He must be so disappointed.
I’m gonna dust off my set golf club and by the end of 2007 I guarantee you I’m gonna go from noob to pro. Watch out, Tiger Woods.

Resolution #6: Finish a 42km marathon in 5 hours time
Now that I have 8kg less “excess baggage” and a better knowledge about what to expect, 5 hours to complete 42km should be quite realistic.

Resolution #7: Climb a mountain
Never climbed a single mountain before in my entire life. Not even our pissy little Mountain Santubong in Kuching.
I know a few people who have scaled Mount Kinabalu in Sabah and came back telling me what a worthwhile experience it was. I’m tentatively planning a trip to KK on the 20th January and if anyone reading this is up for the challenge, maybe we should attempt to conquer Southeast Asia’s tallest mountain together.

Resolution #8: Appear on reality TV
Hey, it’s possible. With so many homegrown reality shows popping up, I thought it might be fun to appear on just one of them. Living so far away from KL might be a problem though.

Resolution #9: Turn into Daniel Craig
Damn tulan. Why every girl I know keeps saying Daniel Craig is hot?

Ok, maybe it’s logically impossible to transform intoDaniel Craig, but I wanna at least lose another 8kg and get a physique like him.
I wanna be hot too.

Happy New Year, everybody. Whatever your resolutions are, may we at least put some effort into achieving it lah.
As an Ah Lian would say, “Everyone jia you! Together we shall gambatte!”.

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