Men Need Help Downstairs Too

Spotted this at New Urban Male in Singapore.

I can understand why girls wanna wear push-up bras. All men look at women’s breasts.
Push-up bras is a scam to trick innocent men into believing that airport runways are actually a set of twin peaks. That is understandable, because a lot of girls feel insecure about their bodies and still wanna look attractive.
But this is just ridiculous.

If I’m so desperate to make myself look artificially bigger in the downstairs department, I don’t have to resort to buying some overpriced underwear imported from the US.
I’ll just tape a freaking banana down my pants.
Besides, it’s cheaper and better that way.

At least I ever get hungry during the day, food is immediately available.

I’ve been travelling so much lately, I just turned down a free all-expense paid trip to Thailand.
Tell me I’m not crazy.

139 Replies to “Men Need Help Downstairs Too”

  1. Push up what?! I thought it was a push up for the ass. Guess I was wrong. But this is so so wrong. Guys don’t flaunt the crotch even if he has a big ding dong.
    Ishkkk… I wonder who’s the inventor? Must have really small birdie lah kot. Hahahahahahahahahah!!!

  2. i bet you bought at least 10 pairs for yourself. hahahahaha. u’re such a poser la kenny. get real. embrace yourself. although i must admit that what you’re doing the true revenge of the nerd. coming back to show your ex classmates what the shy fat boy that nobody liked/knew can do eh?

  3. Hmm… maybe it:
    1. Keeps your testicles from touching your thighs and therefore decreases the heat (…and low sperm production)
    2. Was designed for aerodynamics

  4. Kenny, nope! You’re not crazy. Not at all. All you’re missing out is just some free accomodation, free air tickets, a chance to explore thailand and eat all the fantastic delicacies there, on-the-house accomodation (which might just be 3 star and above), more food, more experiences, more fun, another well deserved break, a cultural journey. Nothing much.
    Well, kenny, you’re not crazy.
    🙂 haha.. 😛

  5. shit, so ridiculous, who will buy it in public? by telling others that one has a small dick huh? wahahaha

  6. i thought ladies tend to check out the ass of the opposite sex rather than the crotch area… looks like i have to push my backside in and stick my crotch out when i walk next time.

  7. YEs, ladies do check out guys crotch like a man do to woman… expecially if a guy were to wear a tight pants or a pyjamas pants, i’ll so stare at it cause i just cant help it… muahhaha…. or if u sit with ur leg super kang kang… u know some guys tends to open their legs really wide when they sit, muahahha, i’ll tend to look at that way by accident n unintentionally… its normal for girls nowadays to look at guys ass or crotch… and i think guys with nice perky ass are sexy!! 😛

  8. wat can i say? woot…EQUALITY!=)
    male and female condoms
    and NOW male and female push ups
    since women can be proud of their pushed lumps,technology should also be inclusive of men being able to push sumwhere to attract gals…and here u go! have fun time men, im sure guys will do much better +D
    P.S. the banana idea is wrong coz it’s like putting two oranges into bras…u get it? wrong texture and feel when u touch it and destroys the illusion and fantasyy…awww

  9. Ahaha…before i forget
    since it’s launched in singapore,it makes perfect sense. Great weapon to attract foreign talents xD.

  10. well.. i’m a girl.. and i do tend to look at guys’ down there especially when they wear thight pants! LOL..!! you guys should get those thgs so you’ll be more ‘marketable’…!

  11. Geeee… dear, hmmmm ….. all trips to Thailand, I’d say, yeah you are perfectly sane. Don’t go… Hmmm push up underwear, wakaka!! make us/women laugh out loud only.

  12. Why need those equipment to make your ‘thing’ looks big? it is sooooo disgusting when men’s ‘banana’ looks that big.
    Anyway, this stuff looks new for me.

  13. lol crap! you found out my secret!! omg!!! thanks kenny…now i got to think of a new one…
    p.s you got a spelling mistake 😉 so you are just human just like us! haha

  14. ewwww…. i dont think its cool when ur dick is 24hrs up…. its so disgusting, some girls might think ur chicky or something…. @_@

  15. yeah, like u gonna have hardon all day. Still u don’t have to torture that thing, more like bondage to me/

  16. if we male are to fake it, lets do it rite. the female mammoth desire stated front and rear. we got the front solved, lets conduct R&D for the rear. and seizhin’s rite!!!..cucumber’s a lot cooler, better texture, reasonably sized ( no no..not the japanese cucumber ).

  17. Am I the only one who thinks your so called “blogging” is one hell of a lame excuse to be funny? It only takes an ounce of grey matter to realise this post ( and a lot more of your other posts ) is nothing more than a pathetic attempt to be funny. Come on! A banana in your pants and not going hungry? How primary school is that? Kenny, if you do not have any quality material to blog about, you can always just not post anything. Seriously. How embarrassing to know that people in Malaysia actually enjoy this sort of shallow humour. Well, you’re definitely doing a good job in that aspect. To sum things up, you’re just not as good as you think you are.

  18. Would have been better if the underwear gives butt support… 😛
    I was under the impression that women look at the butt more… saggy bottoms are so no-no…
    At least I am of that opinion.

  19. Imagine that someone does wear that.. then some girl actually check out his crotch and attracted by it… they talked.. and talked.. all the way to his apartment.. have some drink.. the tension is no more bearable.. they tear each other’s clothes… and.. kissing.. and hugging.. and rubbing… she unzip her skirt, he unzip his pants, the girl throw his thong.. hmm.. the guy take out the underwear.. and… jeng.. jeng..jeng… a belt attached to it!! oh! would the girl continue and thought that just another thing to unbelt? or would the girl run and imagine how could that be possible? what now?

  20. Hi Kenny,
    Rmbr the LG shine contest you featured few weeks ago? Well I joined the contest using the link you provided in the blog and guess what.. I am the GRAND PRIZE WINNER of LG shining moment contest!!!! Thank you U for featuring the contest in your blog.
    Claudia Peter

  21. That “THING” looks most uncomfortable,I squirm just looking at it. Even for those so insecure as to actually pay money for that sling,they would need tight pants to “Highlight their enhanced Profile” WHAA! Looks as if you could actually shoot yourself in the foot by accident.
    Obvious next Question: Some prime examples for variation between Sight & Touch. “SURPRISE”!
    Reminds me of a line in an old movie: “Is that a pistol in your pocket or do you really like me”.
    Trust an old war horse guys: Size might matter for a few,but how you use what you’ve got is most important. Wanna really know,ask a “WOMAN”,not a girl.
    Thanks for the laugh. Since seeing that contraption I’ve been telling mine “How lucky he is”.

  22. Omg, did they really sell that in Singapore?
    Maybe they are trying to hint something about men there…no offense to those from Singapore though!
    Wow, crazy.

  23. big balls so what?
    Its the banana that counts.
    Looks big so what?
    its the behind walls performance that counts. RIGHT?
    Dun bother la.

  24. To Eric,
    Although personally i dont really know mr kenny,he is definitely much much more than what you think he is. I’m not from Malaysia but i absolutely enjoy and lurve his style of writing. It’s witty,entertaining and i look forward to his blog entries even the not-so-funny ones. My friend gave me kennysia’s link one day and i’m happy to say,from the moment i clicked? i’ve been a happy fan ever since. Reading kennysia never fail to add an extra bounce in my steps.
    keep it up kenny..

  25. I just read the short talk. you’re crazy, dude. anyone who turns down that kind of free trip is crazy.
    And the underwear.. geeze..

  26. kenny,
    juz imaagine, during hot day…very hot weather n u go out with ‘ banana taped under ur….’…

  27. Eric has a point, you don’t have to be uptight or a hater to see that this post fails terribly at being humorous and would only be appreciated by a more…simple-minded demographic.
    It’s funny how some people take Kenny worshipping a bit too far. Props to him for having a successful blog, but come on man, remarks like “ohh Kenny you’re so cool” don’t do much for his fanboys’ dignity!

  28. I’ve been travelling so much lately, I just turned down a free all-expense paid trip to Thailand.
    Tell me I’m not crazy.
    I say: You are not crazy. There you have it.

  29. And if you get hungry on a HOT day, you can always use a cucumber as an alternative! Heh, can’t believe I just said that..

  30. LoL XD Is there nothing else to be invented instead of the push-up underwear for men?? Anyway, that’s a gd try! Who knows there might be “push up bras” for gay in future as well hurh?! Haa…

  31. This so reminds me of that movie, European Gigolo..I think. Hahaha..
    Yes. You’re crazy. You know, at least give the trip to someone else…

  32. does that weird underwear makes the P***S look erected the whole day??? Omg… that really suit gays… does any women likes 2 c a guy that erect the whole day??? @_@.. Weird…

  33. Well, i personally dun have dis kinda prob, I dun see any of dose kinda underwears in sale in malaysia, perhaps Sg males need it more than we do. hahaha…. just jk.

  34. Dear Kenny,
    Why is ur life is so colorful and interestin?
    u can work and travel always.. i feel so sian about my job.. kena backstab.. kena fuck upside down.. sipeh sian..

  35. wtf…everyone’s banana is in normal size when “cooldown” when they start the engine, it can grow to a few times bigger. so u dont have to hang der everytime, maybe when u start the engine later , it will go sengek

  36. To my students, No, dont u ever try that! The bananas I give out every Monday is for u to eat, its for your brain,to make u more alert in the class!

  37. hahahaa! now its even. we have push-up bras, you have push-up underwear.
    and yeas we look. i tend to look more at the butt tho, gives you an idea of how athletic a guy is..hawt. =P

  38. No, kenny.. u’re not crazy for turning down an all-expense trip to Thai. U’re stupid instead. 😀 does that make u feel any better?

  39. i think those underwear are meant to be for post-hernia patients..:)..they have a purpose to support the testicles..if i’m not a mistaken

  40. kenny you should offer your rotten banana to nicolekiss to play with…see if she chops it off with a chopper or not…

  41. hey hey.
    haha. It’s just funny how humans are constantly and periodically insecure about themselves, despite the fact that they are already beautiful or handsome in their own way or another.
    I mean, come on man. Regardless of push-up bras or push-up underwear for men, you flaunt it, then a guy/girl sees you and fall in love with you because of it (SHALLOW!!!) then when it’s time to reveal your oh-so-big (insert name of private parts) to your partner…
    then how?

    Ah! I want all expense to Thailand.
    Guess you need all the rest you need now Kenny.
    Anyways, how do you even cope with the transition from teenager-> young adult -> adulthood.
    You seemed pretty…steady in this.

  42. innovative idea, but somehow don’t you feel weird if yours is so pushed up till the extent u will feel so embarassed and kept hiding it??

  43. omg~! I gasp looking at the pic featuring the male part being strangled by the strap in the underwear~!
    A little advice to guys out there: Unless you wish to wear that piece of sh*t all your life to feel “big” otherwise just foget about it. Slip in a banana like Kenny said or just live & be happy with the S.I.Z.E.

  44. Lol. Guys relax, it’s a just a push up.
    Creativity comes in all forms, sizes, etc. That includes your weanies too.

  45. You’re not really going to eat that banana, are you? Unless you like traces of piss and cum in your food.

  46. i’m considered flat but i don’t buy/wear push-ups. flat, flat lah. why do u have to bluff ppl’s eyes? if the bra comes wif removale pads, i always remove them 1st. for clothings, comfort is priority to me.
    it’s so obscene to see a guy’s bulge there. sometimes in a train, where space is limited. i just don’t know where to look at, so no choice had to close my eyes. there are also some middle-age guys who wear trousers which are ill-fitting.
    it’s worse when they sit right opposite of u.
    so embarrassing.. #$%&*

  47. Just my 2 cents.
    Are the ones troubled by the “humor” of this entry,those with flat hineys? Because if they are, then i can totally understand why they find it soooooo offensive?
    I’m a girl and if someone blog about boobless girls and poke fun at their wonder products i would definitely feel offended IF i have no boobs.
    Sensitive giler beb.
    But thank my lucky stars that’s not the case. But it just made me wonder..hmmmmmm..

  48. You re rely “NOT” crazy for not going to free-all expenses paid trip to thailand. It’s FREE, Kenny!

  49. Erm……..
    Very sorry to break in on.
    I want to ask about….
    How could I do a blog myself?
    Now I am just a middle school student.
    I try to learn more about it.
    Cause I want to study Computer Practical.
    So I need to learn it for my future.

  50. Wat if he rips her panties off, and she rips his undies off.. with that strapped on, i wonder if more than just his undies will come off… lol..
    cut him some slack la… u think u can blog better then go blog yourself… i personally enjoy reading his articles cos some are interesting…

  51. i’m a girl, and sometimes i do check out guys down there and their ass! We’re human too! although brains do matter la… 😛

  52. hahahahahaha.
    Kenny, I think you’ve got some latent homosexuality la. Come on, NEW URBAN MALE is for gay men.
    Go inside and look at the sales promoters if you don’t believe me.
    but it’s cool. you’ve got your GAYDAR profile, anyway.

  53. hahhaha..Just imagine everytime you got to toilet, you have to take out the fruit first and put it back nicely!Is quite troublesome la:D

Leave a Reply

Your email address will not be published. Required fields are marked *