Malaysia Airlines Unveils New Uniforms

Everybody knows how much I “love” my local newspapers. Well, one thing I “love” more than the newspapers here are the MPs who feed on our tax ringgits. Take for example the news article below.

(Excerpt from The Borneo Post, 18th April 2005)

Before you continue reading, I advise you to drink a glass of cold water and make sure that the fire blowing out from your nose is not burning your keyboard into flames.
Well I don’t think I need to say anything more on this “sexy dressing is inviting people to rape you” issue. To say its the woman’s fault she gets raped because she wore a low cut blouse, is like saying its YOUR FAULT you get sodomised because you have an asshole.

The MP talked so much bullshit she had to put on her oxygen mask.

Yes, next time I’m just gonna press the “Call Attendant” button and when the air stewardess comes around I’m just gonna rip her clothes off and fondle her breasts, then scold her for making me so horny.
Now if you think about it, the Baju Kebaya isn’t really that low-cut anyway. At least the collar is still quite tight, so when the stewardess bend over no “juicy details” is revealed.
I mean, lets compare our air stewardesses that to Singapore. Once I was onboard an SQ flight when the air stewardess bent over to serve me my dinner-on-tray.
Guess what? I thought she was serving me an extra two buns!

Ladies and gentlemen. Study the subject carefully. THIS is the reason behind our rising sex crimes.

I always like the cabin crew of Malaysia Airlines. I know many people who complained how some of their flight attendants mistreated some poor passenger, but the fact is that these are just a few bad apples among a basket full of good ones. Personally I’ve met some bitchy ones but most of them are really nice, accommodating and professional so I think they’re actually doing a great job.
However I’m just not a big fan of their management team. See, its especially difficult to like them after they fired one of their leading air stewardess just because she’s pregnant. And I wonder why they fired a pregnant lady because CLEARLY she won’t be contributing towards any rape case.

Whoops! There it goes. Some just got raped because this stewardess swung her hair in a sexy manner.

But anyway, a little bird told me that due to that Barisan Nasional MP’s comments, Malaysia Airlines is working through day and night madly trying to create their new uniforms. Rumors has it that these uniforms will ‘gerengtee’ to solve all the issues associated with that evil rape-inducing figure-hugging low-cut Baju Kebaya. I was told, thanks to these new uniforms, that rape claims will drop, male passengers will be more comfortable and everybody can live happily ever after.
What’s more? They could be ready next time you choose to fly with Malaysia Airlines!
As usual brings you the first sneak peek at the NEW Malaysia Airlines uniform. ๐Ÿ˜‰



Yep, I bet our skies will be a much safer place then. Amen.

70 Replies to “Malaysia Airlines Unveils New Uniforms”

  1. HAHAHA ROTFLMAO!!! i thot they were iraqis airline or Afghan Airline !!!! dem i bet you all those qweilos will lari lintang pukang if they sees this!

  2. OMG OMG OMG…I see Hands…
    *Que Hommer Simpson Drooling image*…
    Sexxaaaaay Haaandsss….

  3. Omg! It’s nearly three a.m in the morning and my inactivity has accumulated a mouthfull of saliva in my mouth. Really, that was a good laugh. Now I have to clean my keyboard.

  4. bwahaHAHahahahahahahahahahhahahahahahaaa…
    i shall GERENGTEE that i’ll never EVER fly with MAS if they ever do their uniforms anything close to that!!

  5. well, I’m sure we all have a good laught from this entry. But besides the laught, let’s get the point and challenge the MPs who wasted tax payers money on blaming women sexiness for their horniness in Parliement. Fuckers.

  6. I’ve always thought that men who insist most on women covering up are the most perverse – they blame their desires on women, as if it is really our conscious will to turn these horny, sexually-repressed fundamentalists on. More often than not it is their (again, perverse) desire to repress womankind; the fact is that they cannot seem to accept that they themselves (men) have the capacity to be animals – it must be EVIL women who are tempting them. Kudos for bringing this to light, Kenny ๐Ÿ™‚

  7. Malaysian MP’s, something to laugh at and something to cry about

    Representing your constituency in the highest legislative body in the country is serious business. Yet, of late, there are a few that insists on mocking…

  8. I started off really annoyed because this is not the first time brainless PAS MPs have opened their big mouths and have let out nothing but hot air. I ended up laughing so hard I’ve got tears running down my face. ๐Ÿ™‚ Boss thinks I’m nuts too ๐Ÿ™‚
    “I always like the cabin crew of Malaysia Airlines. I know many people who complained how some of their flight attendants mistreated some poor passenger, but the fact is that these are just a few bad apples among a basket full of good ones. Personally I’ve met some bitchy ones but most of them are really nice, accommodating and professional so I think they’re actually doing a great job.”
    Agreed! Not to mention MAS food is better than SIA’s ๐Ÿ™‚

  9. I thought the baju kebaya worn by the cabin crew is pretty conservative(don’t reveal much of the melons)I don’t understand the MP point maybe they should blind their eyes if they cannot stand the nice and pretty kebaya.

  10. Firstly, these bunch of MPs are denying their own culture and heritage.
    Secondly, they implicitly admit to the fact that they are the by-products of rape from the previous generation where the women wear baju kebayas and the men wear sarongs. (I am glad that my ancestors wear cheongsam and samfu. ๐Ÿ˜‰
    Lastly, these bunch of horny MPs should be fired!!!

  11. i always against the theory that woman exposed their body will lead man to rape…
    that’s totally shit..
    we may stand up when we see parts…but not rape them!

  12. those who say that it is the victim’s fault for being rape because how she wear or her voice being too sexy is those who need to be raped by me…now i understand why we still stuck in zaman jahilliah…come my site and read stuff under “junks” category then you will know what i mean

  13. It doesn’t matter if it is a white pussy cat or black pussy cat, so long as it does what a pussy cat suppose to do. hmm… *deep thought*

  14. -_-” These MPs are actually the real maggots that get the arousal by the kebaya. They wanna do this so that they won’t kena cubit telinga by their singa wives when they couldn’t control their eyes or their fugly hands on the aircrews. Stoooopid!!

  15. I could see clearly on your joke up until the last image. Seriously, I was laughing till the image of the muslimin women are used.
    Seriously, the use of Islamic gear is of bad taste. Why not use catholic nun’s dress, female swami attire, female buddha nun, female sikh guru (if there’s any?), iban female withdoctor, female tibetian lama, etc….
    Think about it?

  16. One more thing.
    The MP are hilarious, yes, and you are talented photographer & photoshopper!
    All the best and keep on noting other people sensitivity. Tolerence is a good keyword.

  17. This is interesting and provocative topic. SIA advertisements in magazines/newspaper typically feature a beautiful Asian woman in figure-hugging blouse, seems very sweet, submissive and ever-ready to serve. American airlines on the other hand, tend to show the schedule and the number of routes they cover. Sex sure sales but ever thought about the subtle implication of the image and stereotyping of Asian women. After all it is a transport industry, it is about routes.
    But I still think the guy is gay, whose ass as tight as San Francisco (SF is a gay city).

  18. mamatd, I think you may have mistaken. ๐Ÿ™‚
    HERE is the stock photo that I’ve used. Note that I’ve photoshopped the cross off due to religious neutrality. After looking at the original photo, do you still think I’m using ‘Muslim women’ in my photoshopped picture? ๐Ÿ™‚
    I was looking for something along the line of “extremely conservative attire” and that picture had what I wanted. Yes I know my jokes may be in bad taste sometimes …. but not THAT bad!
    Lets hope we don’t suffer from that “Racist LRT Advertisement” syndrome here.
    But its interesting though. Catholic Nuns – Cross = Muslim Women lookalikes. Its good and its bad. Bad ‘cos people might think I’m making fun of people’s religion. Good ‘cos it shows I’m not targetting any specific religion . Hmm…
    Like I said, I chose that stock photo because it shows a group of women in extremely conservative attire and that’s exactly what I wanted. The religion thing didn’t even cross my mind.

  19. Hi, don’t go verboard with such captions to BPost pix — mGf there might just be Upset with the Plicence taken. I know writers are given some leeway, just pls don’t use a rope. OKorKnot?
    As for uniform, pls turn to page 6, theSUN today header: Uniformed Islamic law by year-end;
    I posted this am: Dressed in Black, White or B&W?
    Kenny, behave thyself when flying SIA, canORcan’t?

  20. mamatd if u want 2 know wads going overboard with a sensitive religion issue and abusing blogpost power..u can surf arnd some other blogpage..i know thrs 1 tat went way overboard asia blog award winner 2004 summore..wad an insult..

  21. there is some serious probs with those MPs head!! siao ar them! i mean, Mas airstewardess are sooooooooo convervative liao lo. wearing those long sleves and long skirt till their toes clothes. have they tried to board on Airasia’s plane? man, those girls are awesome! short minis and tight and low cut tops. plus, their uni are red in color! so waht are they? stripper?
    how bout innocent college/ uni female students who have both brains and body and wear LEGALLY acceptable clothing (eg. baby T and jeans)? are we sluts? and are we alluring those guys who can’t keep their ‘stuff’ to themselves?
    sioa ppl! one day i hope i can kick those assholes butts! (online kicking kicking kicking!!!!) hell to them!

  22. oh ya, one more thing. (this is really getting up to my nerves!!) for those MPs or guys who love to find LAME excuses saying how women dress arouse them, i strongly recommend u to chop off your balls and burnt it. happy? no more rape case!

  23. Kenny.
    Please do accept my apologisies, abundant of them.
    My bad for assuming the worts, yeah, prejudice!
    Seeing the original picture shows the true story. Anyways, the missing-cross on the nuns have indeed given a different image of the ‘new stewardess’. ๐Ÿ™‚
    Take good care of yourself and carry on blogging.
    Thousands, no, zillions apologies, again,

  24. Daily linkets 21st April

    Beijing: not quite the world’s style capital. Pamela Anderson blogs! (via Danwei). Does she recited the Blogger’s Prayer daily?, a Singaporean-related blog aggregator. Mr Brown explains it is a Boing Boing for Singapore. Off the beaten tra…

  25. Actually, it was the newspapers that made it sound like the MPs made such a big deal out of it. In actual fact, the more serious MPs couldn’t be bothered with the whole issue since most of them agree that AirAsia stewardesses dress less appropriately. Most of the MPs thought the whole debate was a waste of time anyway.

  26. Holy shit, this was funny, especially that last pic! I am so staying with AirAsia after this, ๐Ÿ˜›
    Why do the PAS MPs always have to ruin everything? If they can’t stand the MAS stewardesses, travel by train or car or something to wherever they want to go-lah. Are they just representing what they want, or what the people want? It’s funny, sometimes. I hate these stupid horny zealots.
    So what? If they “low-cut” their kebayas any more, I can “gerengtee” you that those PAS guys are going to explode.

  27. someone should rape a handful of them for being so stuck up.. u an air stewardess, not a fashion model!! haha..

  28. Wan Zafran,
    If you read again the Borneo Post article as posted by bro Kenny up there, it is not just the PAS MP who commented on this issue.
    You have such a lovely nickname.
    It would be nicer if you don’t make fool of yourself by such premature and “prejudice” comment. ( and you too, SY ! )
    Can’t you read ” BN – Tangga Batu ” on it too ?
    Especially, when he is the one who actually first came up with “..the uniforms would arouse sexual desires..” thingy ?
    Btw bro Kenny,
    I dont think this is a “religious issue” but this is more on our moral values as Orang Timur instead.
    Tak faham ?
    Try Japan Airlines or Lufthansa and do comment on their on board uniforms. Maybe the MPs are actually referring to such way of clothing when they decided to talk about this.
    Think about it.
    Thank you.

  29. Hi Kenny,
    I came across your site and wanted to know if you have the instruction for folding incense money for Ching Ming. My grandma died in Sibu last week at the age of 97. Since I am unable to make a trip back, I’d like to burn some for her here in the U.S.
    Thank you!

  30. hai,act b a stewardess is my dream.i juz hope i can get it,so no matter wat had hapen i oso ll try my best to make my dream cm true!!!ganbateh

  31. you forgot the kurbah !
    they should look more like ninja !
    Teenage mutant ninja turtles ! ! !
    Master Splinter !

  32. excuses. the leaders who suggested this were actually rehearsing the rape routine in their dirty little minds as they were interviewed. we all know one or two of these ppl who are heavily suppressed under their religious laws. the more they are suppressed, the more out of control they become. if there are no laws in this world, they’ll gladly rape all women in the world. and i aint kidding! we are most vulnerable to the ones we trust dun we?

  33. totally agree with you!!
    besides, i think that the more the government tries to makes things go taboo, the more the males in the country go crazy!!! ie. the reason why male passengers get turned on by “low-cut” (or i dont even know how is that baju kebaya low-cut), is because they have never seen anything low-cut like that before, so the moment the are exposed to something like that, they get aroused…
    that’s when exotic turns erotic… but great entry!!

  34. much as i like your blog posts and the way you adress issues and turn them into humourous articles and taking the piss out of them,im from singapore and i realize you seem to critisize our services,people and basically stuff you like,have something against us?just asking.

  35. hi kenny. very curious. could you do a stand-up comedy say like at Bangsar Acting Studio in near future?
    you good at blog what about impromtu stand-up comedian?
    just a thought…

  36. firstly, as a stewardess, your entries r great cures for homesickness and sleepless nights.
    secondly, if malaysian MPs thought of revamping MAS uniform.. why not consider the ultra-unflattering Japan Airlines uniforms? looks like some relict from the retro era!!!
    Malaysia boleh!

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