My Doctor Thinks I’m In Primary School

Some time ago, my hairstylist told me I was going through the early stages of male pattern baldness. 🙁

The discovery left me quite distraught. I’m only 24 dammit. I don’t wanna go bald! At least not during the peak of my youth.
After some consideration, yesterday I decided to do something right away instead of waiting till my hair all drop off and turn into Stone Cold Steve Austin. For the first time, I went to seek a doctor for help to give my hair some much-needed renovation.

I’ve done my research so I know exactly what I wanted – a prescription drug called Propecia. Currently, it’s one of the few clinically-proven treatment methods to solve my problem. That’s what I requested from the doc.
So there I was sitting in the consultation room. The doctor checked my pulse, checked my blood pressure, making sure I have no foreseeable allergies to the drug. Then he sat down, looked at me dead in the eyes as he went through the list of potential side effects.

Doctor: “Mr Sia, do you understand the side effects for taking Propecia?”
Kenny: “Yes…”
Doctor: “Do you understand that about 3% of all men taking Propecia will experience this?”
Kenny: “Experience what?”
Doctor: “This.”
Kenny: “Huh?”
Doctor:THIS!”
It was then that I realised the doctor was actually trying to show me something. The doctor was discreetly covering his hand with a piece of paper, while flexing his index finger like this.

I stared at his finger blankly for a good 30 seconds, wondering what the hell this crazy doctor was trying to do.
Then it clicked. Of course! What my doctor meant to tell me (but too shy to say it out loud), was that 3% of men who take Propecia will experience erectile dysfunction!
Doctor: “It won’t be permanent if that’s what you’re worried about. Once you stop taking the pills, it’ll be ok again.”
Kenny: “Yes doctor, I understand that. It’s only 3% lah, so I’ll take the risk.”
Inside my heart, I’m hoping that it’ll remain this.

Don’t worry ladies, I should be in the other 97%… I think.

Then as I was sitting there, I thought, “this is awkward!”
Look, the doctor and I are both grown-ups, and here we are talking about erectile dysfunction using FINGERS?! Say the words “erectile dysfunction” lah, doctor!
I would have thought that’s the first thing doctors learnt in medical school. Their lecturer should be projecting this HUGE-ASS photo of a big throbbing penis on Powerpoint, so everyone could have a look at it, had a laugh, got ALLLLL the giggling out of their system until it actually becomes very normal for them to say “penis”.

Imagine how professional is it for a doctor to go “hmm… your little birdie might not become big bird anymore. :(”
Anyway, I think this doctor of mine must have skipped that introductory class in medical school. That’s why he ended up the rest of his medical career calling “breasts” as “boobies” or “faeces” as “poo poo”. Oi, I look like 6 years old to you is it?

On my way out of the clinic, nature called and I felt the urge to take a piss. But the toilet door was locked, so I approached the clinic receptionist and went, “excuse me miss, can I have the key to the toilet please?”
“I really need to go wee wee.”


Quote of the Day: “Yeah, I’m a thrill seeker, but crikey, education’s the most important thing.” – Steve Irwin
Wah! So many tortoises on MSN.

114 Replies to “My Doctor Thinks I’m In Primary School”

  1. Any ideas why they are using tortoises to symbolise the “Crocodile Hunter”? I thought they ought to use crocs instead 😛 Good entry, btw.

  2. better to say this very sensitive issue indirectly, your doctor is sensitive and nice enough to used his clever finger to tell u this. if my doct used those words ‘e d’ , i will feel like my banana getting a sept 11 attacked!

  3. If you lost your body hair, I can help by suggesting you MICROGEN PASTAE (search google for details). For hair… can’t help, you got to take the 3% risk…

  4. ROFL! The doctor’s funny…
    Oh, and they use tortoise because that’s the closest to crocodiles… no crocodiles smiley in msn msger 🙂

  5. (tu) that thing is a turtle meh?
    if u look closely it resembles a crocodile facing front lei…..
    my hair also not much but i dont want get ed…susah o…just 18

  6. So I’ve got two different versions – one, it’s because MSN doesn’t have a croc emoticon. Another, because Irwin likes/ed tortoise/turtle. I wonder which is the real one? Hmm..

  7. Erm Mr. Kenny, Dont mind me sharing what i know, hair loss medication is a higher percent chance of erectile disfunction than 3%. Many actually still can get it up, but blank shots. So no point right? But on the other hand MSD has always come out with good drugs so i guess it should be all good.
    Bald is not THAT bad.. Once you get used to it, you might just love it. There is always another option of ermm… Wigs? or Implants.
    just joking… i still wish you all the best 🙂 Don’t be pissed 😛

  8. OMG !!! The doctor probably is a gay and wants to check your wee wee if it is still erecting or not. Who knows kenny. He is giving you a hint so that you will get erected and he will grab it…MUAHAHAHAHA !!!

  9. heya kenny~^_^ i should be posting on the post before but i hope posting on an earlier entry would probably get your attention~
    i’ve posted your superman picture up on my blog~
    hope thats ok
    feel free to disapprove and i’ll take it down immediately!!

  10. in medical school, anything of that nature is discussed openly and has never raised any brows.
    things like who’s using what methods contraception, who’s having ED, etc. = normal
    i think doctor is just afraid u shy. 🙂 good luck with the med.

  11. my grandma said u can use “coffee powder(kopi hun)”…nescafe i think this is what she meant…and use that like shampoo…work de oh..probably..coz my dad age 53 still not bald..summoe natural black

  12. Kenny… good to know you’re on Propecia. I was on the same drug and used to pay thru my arse – RM160/pack. Until I discovered generic Propecia. Dubbed Finpecia (produced in India), it contains the same 1mg Finasteride drug. And guess what… 1 year’s supply (12packs) = RM120.00! Well, I got it from India but apparently u can buy online. Go check it out! Why pay more for the same shyte?

  13. Hi Kenny,
    In conjunction with Propecia, you may also want to use the shampoo called Nizoral. Hope this works for you.

  14. propecia works better when it’s truly male pattern baldness. from your blog it doesn’t look like that for you. but i guess it’s worth a shot.
    ED is rare. other side effects include growth of breast tissue in men. that may not be reversible.
    if you’re sure you wanna give it a shot, might be cheaper to have your doctors prescribe Proscar, which contains finasteride 5mg/tablet, and you cut that into little pieces yourself. Prpecia has 1mg of finasteride per pill.
    but you didn’t just hear me say that. 🙂

  15. Well, in Melbourne, as medical students/doctors we certainly don’t use euphemisms nor fingers. We just say it as it is. I’m aware that such topics are quite sensitive in Malaysia, but is it really THAT sensitive that doctors aren’t even allowed to say it? I mean, it is used in a scientific context afterall… Please enlighten me.

  16. Doctors these days! Brought my nearly-90 year-old aunt to hospital and the doc on duty askd if she had her period regularly! BTW, they say massaging ur scalp with brandy will ease hair loss problem. Just don’t go driving after that or the police will arrest u for drunk driving!

  17. want to tell you that it’s ok since you dun really use the ‘finger’ at the moment, right?
    but think of it this way…
    u want more hair or u want a useable ‘finger’?
    dun forget, hair is something you try to get rid off every month or so by cutting it. and hair causes friction when u go for marathon.
    the finger…? dat one leave it to u to decide how useful it is… hahaha…

  18. SO HOW IS THE DRUG? I AM ALSO GOING A LETTER BALD LIKE YOU BUT COULDN’T AFFORD 2 BUY THE DRUG, SO I USE NATURAL ONE EG. FRESH FISH & HALF RAW EGG. GIVE IT A TRY IT WORK 4 ME & IT ALSO BOOST MINE ‘PERFORMANCE’ IF U KNOW WHAT I MEAN. HAVE A NICE DAY.

  19. kenny! fyi, i read somewhere tat baldness is due to very high testosterone level… i’ll jus leave it at tat, i’m sure u’re imaginative enuf to figure the rest =P
    Cheers!

  20. Hi Kenny, I’ve known someone who is in his late 40’s taking the medication. His hair has certainly looked much better. He’s got thicker hair now.

  21. I have a quite proven shampoo to introduce to you… It’s call the Professor brand, Robbi shamppo. It’s available in Spore and Malaysia but through agents only. All my relatives and frens find it extremely effective… Probably you can try it out… And most importantly , no side effects…

  22. hope it help ur hair growth, i’m also suffering this.
    my hair is getting thinner day by day, shake hair when see the hair on my hand during shampoo.
    sigh, keep me inform if it helps!

  23. Dear Kenny,
    Being a user of Propecia myself, let me share some insights about the drug.
    Firstly, for the effect to really kick, you have to use it minimum of 3 months, after that, you will notice that your hair gradually drops less and eventually stops. However, it is again depending on individuals. I also use it with special shampoo which cost RM198 per bottle (750ML)
    Cost per 28 tables = RM190
    3 months x RM190 = RM570
    3 months shampoo = RM198
    Total cost = RM768 !!
    Personally i quit taking it after 4 months as the effects are minimal. Like what my father always say, the only thing that can stop the hair from falling is the “Floor”.

  24. Haha…
    doubt u will ve tat side effects lah…
    but even if u ve juz stop taking lor…
    wont die…
    at most go bald
    so if it’s either bald or erectily dysfunction…
    which one would u choose?

  25. hey man, use it, it works fine with me.. my hair gets thicker and it has not given any problem to my little brother.. everything works fine and I’ve been enjoying sex like never before!
    Trust me, use it for healthier looking hair, inside out!! 😛

  26. sure, 3% is little….i mean, people don’t get pregnant if they use condom while having sex..it is 97% effective…it’s SAFE….u don’t see girls getting knocked up everywhere…oh wait,i was wrong!
    good luck dude

  27. chinese saying”nine out of ten baldheaded man are rich men”so by the time you get older you must be damn rich liao!hehe!

  28. Don they have other kinds of prescription? My bf is also going bald but from the front rather than from the middle…He is using hair regrow lotion, not so sure if it does helps a lot? but have you tried chinese herbalist? That’s what his planning to take next….

  29. dun weri….baldy are sexy…..it reminds us woman of someother head located somewhere within down there…hehehehehe

  30. heyeeeeee…..i know who that’s doc is..
    someway next for westwood restaurant rite?
    not to worry can speak foochow to him too.. we call it “apijiao!!!!” (little birdy…)

  31. lol if I happen to have a hint of male pattern baldness i would just go bald.. save all the money and trouble
    and hey, maybe I look good with bald

  32. I forgot to add, use Kerastase Bain Prevention shampoo, it’s for hair loss, also good, on a daily usage one bottle can last up to 4 months!
    Check it out dude! Good Luck! 🙂

  33. My hair is thinning as well… at first I’m thinking of taking medication like Kenny does but… the cost is too high for me. Well… I think there are girls like sexy bald men.. hehehe, at least my girlfriend doesn’t mind.

  34. Haha! ED is the best form of contraception! No stiffy = no sex = no baby! Ta Daah! Safe!
    I think i saw in CSI or something a guy using Propecia (criminal) was discovered/identified cos his hair glow in certain UV light or IR light or somehting like that. Don’t go committing crimes now, or you’ll be found out cos your hair glow! hahaha!!

  35. I’m your typical ang moh bold guy, I kind of miss my hair but I never really had a problem with losing it. It’s very common for caucasians to get bold so I’m not alone. My question is, how long are you going to take this medicine, the rest of your life?

  36. doctor produce by the education system of malaysia … asian people was not so open as white “aug mon” anyway is funny ..you Rock kenny

  37. hey kenny… propecia really got dis kinda side effect o.. but really will help ur rambut grow…. hhmm… cost u a lot oh!! or u can try on de shampoo call pregain or regain 2% / 5% … at least i nv heard of any side effect. anyway, all de best…

  38. Hahaha lol. I’m sure you won’t be so unlucky as to fall into the 3% “bent-pinky-finger” group. Otherwise it would defeat the purpose of the treatment in the first place won’t it? 😛
    Gosh, imagine being told you have “boobie” cancer or something… >_

  39. haha it’s turtle not tortoise, i didn’t conform to the message asking people to put a turtle in the nick, instead i posted a huge turtle in my blog to pay my homage, trying to imitate your sense of humor hehe, oh well, rest in peace steve irwin..
    and that moving picture of your finger is kinda gross…..lol

  40. Funny you should mention about hair loss in your bloggie cause I am going to go for an interview tomorrow to see Mr. Shebby for some hair loss miracle. So, that’s what they all say…

  41. hey my dad takes propecia too.funny my mum never mentioned bout e erictile dysfunction part 🙂
    neways it really works, my dad’s e living proof.
    speaking of e male genitalia, my bio lecturer is one sick guy. during our bio lecture, he mentioned that there was nothing to be shy about saying the word penis. and he said we unintentionally mention e word in our everyday lives.for eg,”my PEN IS in my pocket”, i stay in tamPINES(pronounced as tam-penis)” . i mean who would even think of such things?! pervert!! it never occurred to me that we say “penis” so many times a day until he said so.

  42. Kenny, hair loss can be due to genetic (if one of your parent get bald in early life) and can be also due to stress in life or may be chemical product e.g. shampoo which dont suit your scalp or causing allergy. if your condition is due to genetic, sorry lah, wat you can do is to pray to God! but if it is due to stress, you have chance to solve it (may be making more love LOL 😉 and use natural product for your hair. if i were you, i wont take that man-made thing, always has side effect, tell u! i wont want to risk my ku ku jiao this way even thou 3% i dont trust western medicine. i hate the side effect. i personally never try this product for hair because i dont need, so i cant tell u more about this, go and check out with ppl who take it b4 you put that in your mouth. Bless you!

  43. I had this problem and was advised to take drugs too. I consulted another doctor. After going through some test, I was told I had oily scalp. I was given a special shampoo and hair tonic to use. After 3 months, my hair grew back.

  44. well kenny, if there’s so much worries about ED as a side effect on you, why don’t you try traditional methods instead? My somebody somebody (i forgot who -.-“) used the traditional method and in 3 months,his hair grown.
    so yyeah.that’s just a suggestion though =)

  45. wee wee? I say “shi shi” when i wanna go pee and “nge nge” for crapping.
    well it’s better than one of my buddies who sticks out his middle finger upside down and rubs it indicating that he’s going for a number 1. i’m just glad he never has to go for a number 2 when i’m around.

  46. Hi Kenny,
    I am in a job that requires me to see Dr doing aesthetic medicine every day. If you are losing hair then propecia can help but you will need to take it for life. if your hair does grows back after taking it then if you stop taking the medicine , your hair will still fall off. Also try to compliment it with minoxidyl 5% solution. It will also help reduce hair loss but again you have to take it for life. Blame it on you DHT hormone man. Those are the culprits that causes male pattern baldness.

  47. I honestly think I, myself, would start losing hair at quite a young age due to the fact I dye my hair sooooooo much ….. =_=
    I feel your pain..
    I think if you really really really do start balding.. you should just shave it all off ! ..

  48. On very rare cases which i find not amusing at all, you’ll get testicular pain by taking propecia.
    Also the morning erection would not be as “strong”.
    Goodluck man.
    I stopped taking it and it’ll all fine now 🙂

  49. Hi Kenny
    Not to worry. I’m 20 and apparently, according to my barber my hair is starting to thin as well. Referring to your hairy post some time back, it’s caused by an excess of testosterone in your system. And if you watched a CSI episode once, Propecia causes violent behaviour in some men…so be careful with it!

  50. Just a comment from a doc still slaving in the government.
    As mentioned by one of the readers, the main reason your doc described the side effects to u that way was perhaps he thought u were shy about that topic.
    We in malaysia have such a variety in social/educational background that a doc who works here needs to adjust our conversation accordingly. U would be suprised to hear the words we use to describe certain issues (a whole new dictionary/pictionary could have been written in multiple languages). Even now when i speak to my fellow friends (non-medical based), i actually can’t remember which words i use are/aren’t jargons. However, it is also a doc’s responsibility to have analysed u as someone who would have understood and accepted the word E.D.
    On your hair loss, cant really help u there, not experienced in the hair area as yet. But in drastic cases, i’ve heard that hair transplant has the highest success rate =)

  51. The 3-5% incidence is actually more of a loss of libido rather than one of erectile dysfunction. A loss of libido is, simply put, a decrease in the sex-drive. A hair tonic containing minoxidil might be a better first-line treatment. But a simple advice: see a dermatologist; he’s the best person to help you.

  52. Kenny, u can try “PA WANG” chinese sampoo promoted my me. u gonna can get from the chinese peddler @RM80 per set, effective why not try it! no joke , i’m serious

  53. Kenny, u can try “PA WANG” chinese sampoo promoted my me. u gonna can get from the chinese peddler @RM80 per set, effective why not try it! no joke , i’m serious

  54. i having hair loss problem since 5 years.
    i already try hun nam hair care treatment. no efect. then i buy hair pro product also no effect. finally i go and see doctor.
    doctor ask me to take propecia medicine.
    so i also taking the medicine. i don’t know how long to take this medicine. i just 1 month started to take this medicine. is it life long medicine. it’s very expensive. i can’t take continuesly. have any other way to solve my hair loss problem. please help me

  55. hello
    i having hair loss problem since 5 years
    i already try hun nam hair care treatment for 2 years but no effect. then i buy hair pro product for 1 years, also no effect finally i see doctor.
    doctor advice me to take propecia. i don’t know how long to take this medicine. and also don’t know it’s 100% work or not. also don’t know got any side effect. somemore the medicine very expensive. is it life long to take this medicine. got any other way to solve my hair loss problem. please help me

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