LG White Chocolate Fashion Phone Giveaway

Remember that delicious LG Chocolate I reviewed a while back?
Hot off the success of the original Black Temptation series slider phone, LG has added two new flavours to their highly popular Chocolate line-up. If black is not your poison, you now have the option of showing off your LG Chocolate in a stunning iPod-esque white or the girly baby pink.

The new White and Pink Chocolate phones retain the same design and functionality as their predecessor, including its minimalistic ultra-slim design, glossy smooth finish and that signature smouldering red navigation touch pad which made the LG Chocolate so popular in the first place. Imagine how many heads you’re gonna turn with this phone in your hot little hand.
Do you want it?
Because I have one LG White Chocolate to give away.

It’s an LG Chocolate. It is white. White represents virginity.

Yes, after photobooks, concert tickets and Croc shoes, kennysia.com is giving away one brand new LG White Chocolate fashion phone, especially for you.
It doesn’t get any better than this.
Question is, how much do you want it? How far would you go to have this sleek little gadget couriered to your door steps? How desperate are you to win this prize?

The naughty side of me was thinking of making people do outrageous stunts to win this prize, like writing “I LOVE KENNYSIA.COM” with a red marker on their forehead and then storm through shopping malls naked. But let’s make it easier and less traumatic lah. To be in the running, all you need to do is post a comment below answering this question.
“Is there a desperate addict in your life?”
What I am looking for are real life stories of crazy things desperate people do to win a boy or a girl’s heart.

This contest idea is inspired by Cheesie’s marriage proposal from that weirdo John, who was so desperate for her he printed Cheesie’s photos off her blog and place it next to the Bible.
Do you know someone who did something outrageous, bizarre, stalkish or even “borderline criminal” to try to impress you? Who knows, maybe you are a desperate addict yourself? Tell us all!
Most hilarious story wins the prize.

Contest closes 11:59pm Friday 17th November and you must include your valid email address when posting your comment. Note that prizes will be mailed out to Malaysian addresses ONLY.
Careful, if you win this LG White Chocolate, everyone is gonna envy you and you’re gonna end up with MORE desperate addicts around you.


Just received in my mailbox, the Islander and yet-to-be-released Offroad compliments of Crocs. Sweet!

392 Replies to “LG White Chocolate Fashion Phone Giveaway”

  1. Funny you should ask that question, cause I remember having a friend who was like that.
    During my primary school years there was this girl, the girl that everyone wants, her name was Afiqah and now everyone was trying to win her heart over, but my best friend Amien seemed to want her the most and her birthday was coming up and everyone was thinking of a present to win her heart over, Amien was constantly bugging me for advice on what to buy her when I finally couldn’t take it anymore I said ‘You go kiss her lah!’ Little did I know he actually ran up to her on her birthday and kissed her on the lips (mind you we were in standard 3 at the time) and she slapped him across the face!, may seem really mean, but it was extremely funny to be there and see him kiss her and get slapped!
    He’s still my friend up until now and we go to school together. Afiqah is gone from our lives though.

  2. oh my god.i remember one now.we were in primary 3.i have this good friend named D(we shall just call him D).D is a naturally hairy person.he had pubes since 7 and chest hair since he was 9.so yess,he keeps himself warm in winter ((:
    and how do i know that?coz he showed us boys.
    anyways,he liked this girl called M.like madly in love.so much so that,on one occasion,after P.E. classes which were held in the school hall that day due to bad weather,he ran up on stage,in front of the WHOLE class and teacher,and belted out the worst rendition of “Right Here Waiting For You” and not just that!he actually took of his shirt after singing the song and shouted “i love you M!!”,all the while baring his hairy chest for a very disgusted class to see.naturally all the boys burst out in laughter.M ran out of the hall,and we later found out she was in the girl’s toilet crying.
    crazy huh?but after that,we all turned out to be good friends all the way till high school.and we still keep in touch from time to time.
    hope that was outrageous enough to steal the amazing WHITE chocolate phone from the other readers. ((:

  3. LOL. I’m going to make sure I keep coming back to read all the comments. I reckon this will be the highest commented post ever. Probably.. 700+?
    Anyways, I noticed you have a new header! Nice, but somehow I still think that it (the candle thingy) isn’t really apt for your page.
    Have fun, people!

  4. Talking about eccentric marriage proposals.
    I’m only 17 and I received uncountable marriages from this guy whom I don’t even know other than that we walk the same way to school.
    Since form 1, we’d happen to walk on the same path to school everyday. Coz our houses’ are really near our school. It was only Form 2 when we started knowing each other as friends and studying together, exchanging notes. However, things took a downturn when during Form 3, he started using plastic straws to twist it into a ring everyday, without fail, asking for my hand in marriage.
    To the extent that one day, he decorated his dad’s car in the most scary misuse of flowers ever. He drove it up to my gate (underage driving!) and used the loud speaker and asked for my hand in marriage! I was so stunned, I just ran up to my room and hid under my blanket!
    Till this date, the neighbours of the lorong still laugh at the absurdity of it. Gosh! It really did scare the wits out of me!

  5. We’ll this story isn’t about my friend or anyone else. This story is about me, a fat Chinese dude who is crazy over a girl, a white beautiful virgin girl.
    When I first laid my eyes on her, I was wondering to my self, what a beauty. I’ve never seen some one as beautiful, as perfect, and as fair as her. I know they’re many desperate people out there who are willing to tell all sorts of love stories in odder to win her heart. Some might be true; some might entirely be bull shit. But mine is true, and I’ll keep to my word.
    So as I was laying my eye and admiring her beauty, I was wondering, how desperate and how far would I go in odder to win her heart?
    So I finally figure out, what to do which would make her heart melt and which would also allow her father to let me keep her.
    So this is how desperate I am, I’m willing to strip naked, but with my boxers on, walk around Bukit Bintang, with the words I love you LG White Chocolate and also Mr Kenny, please let me take her home. I would even shout out those words.
    This is how desperate I am.

  6. i rather write “I LOVE KENNYSIA.COM” with a red marker on ma forehead and then storm through orchard road to win.
    too bad, its not valid for s’pore fans.
    BOO kenny!

  7. I had a serious crush in this man who’s 16 years older than me. He’s married and had a daughter. I want him so much even if i knew it was impossible. I’d wait in front of the computer until late night even if there’s school the next day just to talk to him. I’d spend all my handphone credit to SMS him or call him. I scribbled all my papers with his names and kept imagining that he belongs to me. I was desperate that I made sure none of the ppl around me has his MSN nor handphone number. I also tried to stop him from spending his time with his family even if it didnt succeed. I think I was desperate. =\

  8. I went up to the girl and pointed 3 fingers. RM300 can or not? She pointed back at me with one finger up only…. 🙁

  9. WHOOPS, forgotten to put my name..so this is a repost.Lets see, this happen to me during when I was in form 1. There was this girl in my school who was…u can say ‘interested’ with me. Ill just call her X since I dun want to hurt her feelings in case she sees this,lol. The scary thing is that she live like 3 houses away from me. She one day got my house number and called me. It was cool in the beginning cause she said she wanted to be just friends with me. Then i found out from one of her friends that she uses a binoculars to ‘check’ me out while i was playing basketball outside my house. I was a lil freak out cuz to begin with the girl wasn’t ‘all that’ what i want in a girl. Her crush on me was also noticed by my parents cause she would walk her dog in front of my house, smile and wave to my parents. One day, all of the sudden called me and said she really love me! I was mean and rude at that time and i said fk….. and hang up. One of her friend also told me that she was obsessed with me that time. She still live 3 houses away from me but thank God shes over me 🙂

  10. well, it started when i was form3 and this girl struck my head with her beautiful smile and ugly me was immediately going crazy over her. I buy her sandwiches and a bottle of softdrink everyday during recess with the hope of getting her fat then no guys would wan her anymore. =P after a while, this tricks does not work anymore so i wrote her poems everyday and send it to her on a stalk of rose for a month.
    she realise how desperate i was and she was touched indeed but she said we were too young to be together but those poems is still wit her as she claimed la..
    eventhought we did not end up together but the memories are still in my heart..somewhere..

  11. This is my story…
    This was way back in 1998….
    When i was in form 1, i started going to BM tuition and there, there was this guy named Calvin. We talked and all like normal friends would until he started trying to impress me.
    The first thing that he did was send me flowers, while i was in class…I was shocked…cuz i didn’t expect anything of that kind…. then he started giving me chocolates.. as a nice person would do..i just thank him for it and kinda ignore him….
    Then in tuition, he tried to impress me by waiting for my car to come pick me up before he went home (he walks). while i’m inside the house, he would come and tell me that my dad is here to come pick me up..etc…
    The creepiest thing was that on his handphone, he would put my number under names like “my darling”, “honey”….Freaked me out lar…he would also act all cool and stuff like that just to impress me….while me and my friends would just laugh our heads off( i know i’m mean).
    He would ask me, would i be his girlfriend many times, over the phone and over the internet….so…being young and naive and also trying to get him off my back…i told him that i wasn’t ready for a relationship (which was true cuz i was only in form 1 that time). telling him that maybe when i finish form 5 then i’ll be ready for any relationship….
    He even sent me a letter, with broken english(he didn’t speak much english). it was hilarious when i read it…my mom found the letter and told me ” if that guy is trying to tackle you…tell him to go improve his english first!” hahahahaha (until this day, i still have that letter kept in a box)
    *fast forward*
    In form 5…
    after not talking to him for awhile..He called my house….saying that we are now in form 5….would i give him a chance….I WAS SHOCKED OUT OF MY BRAINS THAT HE CALLED!!! and he remembered what i said when i was in form 1!!!i was freaked out and didn’t know how to react…so i told him that i was still not ready(hahahaha) and just told him i didn’t like him…nothing happened after that…
    Since then,I’ve lost contact with him….and sometimes wonder where he is now… and until now…my ex-tuition mates still tease me about he tried so badly to impress me!!!!
    PICK ME, KENNY……i’ll then try my best to impress you!!!! HUGS AND KISSES

  12. Hai Kenny, I am a desperate addict of my little cute and adorable turtle teddie. It have been with me since I was born. Although it is torn here and there and smells a little [hey, it been more than 20 years] but I still love my little Poochie[that’s her name] the most. I need Poochie to sleep everynight and I will talk to her most of the time before I sleep. Now that I am married, I even brought it to my new house to sleep together with my husband and I. So now my little Poochie have a mama and papa to talk too. Some ppl may think that this is unappropriate but I love Poochie very much.
    Poochie : Hello uncle Kenny. Pls let my mama win the LG phone. I love my mama a lot. Thanks

  13. Hai Kenny, I am a desperate addict of my little cute and adorable turtle teddie. It have been with me since I was born. Although it is torn here and there and smells a little [hey, it been more than 20 years] but I still love my little Poochie[that’s her name] the most. I need Poochie to sleep everynight and I will talk to her most of the time before I sleep. Now that I am married, I even brought it to my new house to sleep together with my husband and I. So now my little Poochie have a mama and papa to talk too. Some ppl may think that this is unappropriate but I love Poochie very much.
    Poochie : Hello uncle Kenny. Pls let my mama win the LG phone. I love my mama a lot. Thanks

  14. 2 stories.
    One is about this group of friends that I had. We were boyband chasers. Seriously, you can stop laughing now. Anyway, one day we followed the group Damage to their hotels and kinda hanged around there until we pretty much got bored. After a few hours or so, we went back home. Unknown to me, one of my friends actually went back to the hotel later that night and found out that there was a girl (a pros.) in one of the band members room. She called me up to cry to me and sounded pretty devastated. So there I was at my phone, groggy from being woken up, trying to console my friend that the guy she was “in love with” is not really tat nice. Hah !
    Another is about this guy who wrote some cryptic poem/message thingy on my “autograph book”. In it, he did write his home number but asked me to guess the last digit. So I actually tried out starting from 0 and called every single one. When I finally got to number 8 (I remembered cos this was my fav. number), he sounded like he had just woken up from sleep. There I was a nerdy girl and told him I had a hard time getting his number. And in a deadpan voice, he told me that he did write the last digit down on the corner of the page and folded it up. =P

  15. haha.. thsi topic remind me when i was in form 2, theres a guy in our class ,MKW. he is a very very cool boy, he dun smile and alwiz act cool, teh worst is me and him are liek water and fire, he is the monitor ofr the class, the 1st word we talk to each oterh is related the name list, coz the name list not prepared yet, me as a treasurer need the name list to “kutip hutang”, haha, ten cent per person~! and i’m the one who prepared the list, and he ask me for the list in a very very rude way, jus liek i shoudl giv him teh list that i make. = = .. that day onward we r totally liek enemy we wont talk or even greet to each other… so funny that time.. and becoz of this, make me more focus on him.. and slowly have some special feeling tru him.. ngek ngek ngek… i like him …but jus becoz of face i dun dare to let him noe… until the end of the year .. the whole class know i like that him… oni himself.. duno that i like him.. haha…but i jus biarpi aja..oh ya.. coz i arrange everythign so i found out his birthday.. so i make a card plan to giv him … but jus duno how to giv it to him… so i didnt giv out… lolz.. the card is still now inside my cupboard… form 3.. we separate.. coz of teh stupid sains we need to study separately boyz and galz… but i still haven giv up like him.. and is obvious until the whole grade student know i like him.. lolz.. but that dumb guy still duno… and one day i very brave and ask him go out dating in klcc… he say ok… u noe ..when we go out rite liek to be a bunch of frem rite.. so we jus go out in one bunch… becoz got meeting so he came late.. me and my fren wen to the movie 1st.. until the half of the movie he call me.. say that he arrive = = shit.. i need ot get out and be wif him.. so i sacrified my “mo mo cha ” go to him… (see how much i like him).. after we met.. we walk around coz my fren haven finish teh movie… and all da way he jus ask me ” u cold onot? ” coz he wante dot giv me his acket he purposely bring for me.. wuahahha.. that time i noe he also liek me.. ngek ngek ngek… so song u noe…^^V after 2 hours liek that he say he need togo home… coz his parent dun let him go home late.. and oni i noe he come out secretly without his parent knowing … JUST FOR ME~! wah~ so happy ne~ … but finally we also dun have any happy ending…we nvr get together… coz theotehr day we went to school… i get up to the stage .. coz i argue wif a prefect.. about wut? about my name tag… my name tag is “Lina” its my surname.. wut wrong if i put lina?? and the stupid prefect jus dun believe that is my surname.. lol.. bodoh .. and coz of this .. he act duno me.. haiz~~~ wut i do is jus wasted.. THANK YOU for the stupid prefect.. wheres MKW now? he now is my best fren’s bf .. both of them now in sarawak studying^^

  16. 🙂
    The only desperate addict I have in my life is kinda obvious – my boyfriend.
    About a month ago, I gave him this pebble. He brings it around in his pocket wherever he goes.
    So one day when we were in school for lunch, he told me his stomach hurt and ran off to the toilet. After the bell rang, he was still not back.
    Apparently, the pebble had dropped into the toilet bowl while he was having diarrhoea.
    My heroic boyfriend knew the importance of the pebble as our symbol of love. He stuck his hand into the mess – the very smelly mess – and tried to find the pebble. Of course, he couldn’t see where the pebble was since everything was…murky. He could only feel around before finally fishing it out, together with his very own shit particles.
    Although it’s disgusting, I’m glad he got the pebble back lah.

  17. It was during primary 5, there were no Playstations. Brickgame was the coolest invention, comparable to today’s PSP, and MicroGenius TV Game was the dream of every little kid. Households with MicroGenius would be packed with children of the entire neighbourhood.
    Naturally, I was desperate to have my own TV Game. I begged, nagged and cried just to persuade my mum to get me one. I even got the first in my class for the final exam, hoping that my mum would reward me. But I still got nothing…
    And there came the last resort… ACT PITY!!! Armed with two Kellogg’s Cornflakes Box (Small packs), some rafia strings, a ballpen, cello tapes and a pair of scissors, I “built” my own TV set and also a MicroGenius. I cut, reshaped and drew the TV Screen, gamepads and even a Street Fighter Cartrigde. After few nights of hardwork, I finally completed my masterpiece. My mum didn’t know that I “built” those stuffs, not until she saw me “playing” with it. Her eyes were filled with tears, so did mine. The very next day, we went to the department store and my dream had finally come true. I had got myself a TV Game. How cool!
    Now Kenny, do you want me to build myself a LG Chocolate out of a cornflakes box?

  18. This story is about my fren, KS. He’s in love with this girl, FC for almost a year. You all may think that this is just a normal one sided love but NO. He’s crazy I tell ya. =X
    KS and I weren’t close friends at first. He’s a happy-go-lucky, funny and hyperactive person who talks crap alot. Everyone knows that he has this great crush on FC. One day I saw him online and his MSN’s personal msg saying “I won’t give up loving you and that is my promise”. I was like, “whoa!” and messaged him.
    Later that night, he called me. He said he has nothing to do. BUT ALL HE SAYS IS FC this, FC that. Whenever he calls me, I can hear him sobbing, weeping, and mumbling. I remember there’s one day, it was the world cup season and I wanna watch Germany vs. Argentina. SUDDENLY HE CALLED. T_T We chatted until the penalty a.k.a. end of the game. You know what we chatted?
    *mumbles*
    “FC… FC…”
    “Her fav color is white… pink… baby blue…”
    “She loves to eat vegetables and fruits…”
    “I want to eat vegetable…”
    “I wanna eat fruit…”
    “I wanna take knife cut fruit…”(This freaked me out. DEPRESSION and KNIFE cannot mix together >__> He even tell me he wanna give his salary to her coz she told him she wanna pay for her own studies. ALL HIS SALARY.
    Just yesterday he smsed me and say those sad things again. He told me to take good care of FC for him and don’t let anyone hurt her. >_> Then he said “I’m tired, it’s time to go.” Today, I still see him sitting behind her. =_=
    There’s no medicine to cure him. That’s how desperate he is.
    MAYBE you guys had seen weirder “desperators” than him, but for me who lived for 19 years until now, I never seen anyone as crazy as him. Everyone of his friends(except me) had already given up hope in him. Haihz. Hope he wakes up soon coz he’s my friend and the only thing I can do is keep him company.
    May he wake up soon. =_=

  19. My 10 year old sister is a desperate addict.
    No, not porn. Not makeup. Not even barbie dolls!
    Damn ANIME! Waste her life only, drooling over lifeless animated “cute” jap characters on the computer and TV screen. I swear anime is some government tool to suck the life of human beings.
    So anyway, she was in the bathroom the other day taking bath when she suddenly SCREAMED “I LOVE SASUKE!!”. She then RAN out of the bathroom DRIPPING wet, swam through the living room to the COMPUTER, and started watching ANIME.
    WET!!! Damn wet brain only!

  20. Oh well, I might as well try for the LG Chocolate with my chocolate…
    I used to like this ger very very much… So much that I was like a puppy during that time.. Every single sight of her made my knees go weak (not cos i had weak knees then) and my heart beat faster! (no heart problems either) I know this sounds ridiculous but ask any guy in his teens, n he’ll most probably have had a similar experience before.
    I used to call her every single nite and talked to her for like 4-5 hrs EVERY SINGLE NITE!!!!!!!!! Dun think we talked much after like the first week but just held on to the phone n either just kept quiet (quite bo liao, i know, but I WAS IN LURVVEEE, or so i thought) or if there was a song on the radio i liked, i’d SING to her.. This went on for like 3 to 4 months or so and i finally popped the question, but she left me hanging n nv gave me an answer… Can u imagine the cost of it(actually not very much) and the number of hrs of my life (this one is quite a bit) just wasted like that?!!?!!
    Moral of the story: Nv sing to win a ger’s heart if u’re not good…
    I guess outrageousness is relative, so if one really thinks about the time spent, it is insanely outrageous… For me, at least…

  21. It all happened way back when i was in standard 5, my teacher taught the class a phrase: “you are the apple of my eye”. I felt touched by the meaning of this phrase.
    The next day, i freaking brought an APPLE to school and gave it to the girl that i was having a crush on while saying: “you are the apple of my eye”.
    She genuinely replied: “apple grow on tree one la… where got in your eyes… u dun bluff me la… u think i small kid mer…?”
    I striaght away “boh lat”(no energy)… Looks like someone really does not pay attention in class!!!!

  22. Oh.. me! me! me!
    I was in Primary 5 when I had a classmate who is also my Nursery classmate. I liked him a lot, so much that I went to join table tennis because he’s in the school team. One day after school I “followed” him home and found out that he stays just opposite the road from me. I sent a love card cum letter “expressing my love” to the address which I thought he stayed at. 2 days later, he was shouting at me in the canteen when I was buying noddle that he doesn’t like me a tiny bit at all, and that I’ve send the thing to his uncle house which caused him to get scoldings. -.-‘ I’ve since then moved house, then realised that he actually stays in the opposite block from my current house. lols. so much “fate”.
    In my secondary school, I had a crush on this very quiet girl. I got her chocolates on Valentines day the first year and blue rose on the second year. Even went to chop off all my hair so that she’ll notice me. Once I secretly requested to my form teacher that I wanna sit beside her in class when I knew teacher was going to change our sitting arrangement. When she mention that she liked this guy she knew for a long time, I was crushed and didn’t talk to her for a long while.. I don’t know if she knows that I liked her. *sigh*
    Then around 3 years back, I was so crazy about my then bf. After breaking up, I went into depressed mode. I was desperate for his attention that I made many many prank calls to his house, (kept quiet when anyone picks up), even in the middle of the night. I cut my wist, took (15times) extra dosage of medication, sat at the window wanting to just “fall off”, even took 5 sleeping pills once cause I wanna sleep and not wake up. I was in “zombie” stage. One day, I “woke up” in hospital and thought to myself, he’s just a ugly fat guy with bad breath and doesn’t know how to please me leh. Laugh at myself and move on with life. I think I’ve scarred his life so badly, he probably doesn’t dares to get another girlfriend anymore. :pPp
    Hey, I have 3 stories lols. Maybe I’m born desperate…
    P.S.: Kenny, I do have a Malaysian Address! =)

  23. He was not the type I could ever, ever fall for. And I think he realised that, so I suppose that was another strong factor which had intrigue him to pursue his ‘love quest’towards me. Seems that all guys find it challeging to try to get something hard to get.
    Of course, the usual cheesy sms-es and gifts are part of the whole ‘courting’ process. I reckon the guy could take a hint after so many a rejection. Guess he’s just one of those stubborn guys who couldn’t take “No” for an answer. Or he may be just plain desparate.
    And here comes the extreme part.
    He offered to send me home after a party, and having no transport on that day I accepted as a last resort. (I later found out that he had arranged earlier for all my other friends to tell me they were too busy). Then he drove way out to this weird road, and I was telling him he got the wrong way and we should turn back. He insisted he knew where he was going and I was at the verge of screaming when we arrived at this weird and dark and muddy river side place.
    And then he produced a bouquet of white roses from the back seat of his car and recite this lame love poem with this slang which I cannot even understand (apparently he took a speaking course to perfect his pronounciation).
    And then, the most cliche thing ever.
    He got out of the car and said through the open door,”If you don’t be mine tonight, I will jump into this river”
    Before I can say anything, he slipped and fell accidentally into the muddy river. *Yuck*
    Till today he still insisted he jumped on purpose. He claimed he could read t\rejection from my eyes.

  24. Oh! I remember one desperate addict story now!
    I have a friend who was so desperate to be ‘cool’ (and to get f*cked, I guess) that she fabricated a story. Get this:
    There was this mechanic. He gave me some pills. I ate them. I fell asleep. When I woke up, I found grease all over my body. He raped me. He took me to the clinic and I found out I was pregnant. I aborted my baby.
    That story somehow spread to a teacher and got everyone into trouble. -_-

  25. hmm…this happened last yr when i was in form 4..i’m in kch but there’s this gal(J) in kl(a kch gal who moved to kl) who emailed me one day askin to be frens..being a guy..got gal wanna be frens of cos can la..afta weeks…she asked for my hp no. which i gave to her…J smsed me practically everyday..den one day..she told me tht she liked me..for two yrs already..she said she had seen me b4 when she came bk to kch..she wanted to be my gf but i reject la..cos i neva seen her b4..i tot tht was the end but then she continued smsing me..keep saying she likes me and stuff..da freaky thing is dat even though she’s in kl..she noes where i am and wad i do..cb man..like afta i played ball at swak club.. she smsed me and said “hey..finish playing ball oledi?”..damn scary man..i tried to ignore her..but she found out my hse no. and keep calling both hp and hse no..she also claimed to have printed my frenster photos which she kept in her room..so one day i kenot tahan nymore..i asked my fren to pretend to be my gf and ask J to stop contacting me nymore..after tht everything stopped..but then beginning of this yr..i received an sms from her again..saying she can’t forget me and she still have feelings for me..mcb..when will it end… mind u..this is true

  26. Hhmmmm…. i hope this is worth it… I feel like im selling my soul here.
    Ok. So it was going to be valentines day (year 2005). I wanted to impress my gf by buying her lingerie (ok, it might not have been a good idea in the 1st place). But i was SURE back then that THAT was what i wanted to get her. It was my 1st time buying lingerie for a girl.
    So i went over to a lingerie shop with a friend who was hoping to get something for valentines day for HIS partner. The problem is, HE’s a dude and it didnt get into our head that there was something wrong with 2 guys goin in to buy lingerie together.
    It didnt help the fact that he was a very buffed up guy in singlet and i had a pony tail then and was very thin…
    We went into the shop and i picked this very short-pink and transparent lingerie. I was giggling to myself lustfully imagining what she would look like in it… I think some of the staff saw what we were doing. I asked my friend if he think it was sexy and he nodded. The staff in the shop were staring at us then.
    I still didnt think anything was wrong with the situation. I was holding the lingerie in 1 hand and it happended that there was this indian kid with his older sister. I was by the counter and this kid came over to stare at what i was holding. ONLY THEN DID I REALISE THE STUPID SITUATION I WAS IN!!!
    The staff by the counter punched the figure i had to pay… but the experience? PRICELESS….

  27. HI!!!!!!!U POST IS UP AT 4.58 & I THOUGHT I AM THE FIRST. BUT THEN GOT ERROR 435. WHAT THE HACK. DESPERATE OR CRAZY THING I DID? HE! HE! HOW ABOUT THIS? I ONCE DATE A LADY & REACH STAGE III ALREADY…WHEN WE ARE ABOUT TO DO U KNOW ‘WHAT’, SHE TOOK ONE LOOK AT ME, AHEM THAT AREA SAY “WHAT A DENCE JUNGLE U HAVE THERE LUCKLY STILL GOT ONE BIG TREE” GOSH!!!!!!!!THAT IS A REAL
    EMBERRASSMENT 4 ME.ANYWAY WE DID WHAT WE DID. BUT I CAN SORT OF FEEL THAT SHE IS NOT SO IMPRESSIVE OR A BIT TURN OFF. SO I HAVE TO DO SOMETHING. WELL U HAVE HEAR OF BIKINI WAX BUT ONLY 4 LADIES.ANYWAY I ASK AROUND (INNOCENTLY OF COURSE) NO SUCH LUCK 4 GUY, NO SUCH SERVICE! DAM THEN I HAVE 2 DIY. I SHAVE ALL THE ‘DENCE JUNGLE’ MYSELF TO IMPRESS THE LADY. IN THE PROCESS I CUT MYSELF A NUMBER OF SMALL CUT. U KNOW GUY WHEN OUR BALL R HARD IT IS VERY WINKLES & DAM HARD 2 SHAVE. THE BIG ‘ROD’ & SUROUNDING IS EASY. WHOAL!! LOOK NICE & VERY CLEAN & ‘NEW’ AFTER THAT. SO THE VERY NEXT DAY WE HAVE ANOTHER SESSION OF U KNOW ‘WHAT’. I SAY 2 HER “I HAVE A BIG SURPRICE 4 U,LAST NIGHT U DON’T LIKE MINE JUNGLE WITH ONE SINGLE GAINT TREE, SO DARLING TONIGHT I PRESENT 2 U A BIG SAHARA DESERT WITH ONE BIG GAINT CARTUS, TARA!!!”.THE LOOK ON HER FACE IS PRICELESS!!!!!!!!HE! HE! THE EXPERANCE IS MUCH ENJOYABLE. AH!!!THE STORY DON’T END HERE. TWO DAY LATER MINE LIFE IS A LIVING HELL.THE ‘SAHARA’ IS STARTING 2 TURN BACK 2 ‘BUSH LAND’.OMG THE FEELING IS TERRIBLE, MINE FAMILY JEWEL IS BEING TORTURE LEFT,RIGHT & CENTRE & I DON’T FANCY ‘CLEARING THE BUSH LAND’ AS THE LADY WENT OVERSEA (SHIP! IF I HAVE KNOW EARLIER I WOULN’T 2 SURPRISE HER).SO THE NEXT BEST THING I DO IS 2 APPLY A LOT PERFUME POWDER BETWEEN MINE LEG A FEW TIMES PER DAY.PEOPLE PUT PERFUME POWDER ON THEIR ARMPIT I JUST GOT ONE EXTRA PLACE TO PUT.NEEDLESS 2 SAY 4 THE NEXT FEW WEEK I SMELL DAM NICE.(LUCKLY NOBODY SAY I SMELL LIKE AH KUA). I ACTUALLY USE UP 2 BOTTLE OF PERFUME POWDER. SO WHAT SAY U. IS THAT DESPERATE/CRAZY TO WIN A GIRLS HEART? BTW IF I SHOULD WIN THE PHONE CAN U KEEP MINE ID SECRET? I DON’T FANCY PEOPLE 2 KNOWN ME. “HORNY ANG MOH” IS JUST U NEXT DOOR NEIGHBOUR.

  28. argghh. I need a new phone that is white..with red navigation touch pad..and I mean the white chocolate! I’m contemplating on stalking you. Okay no, I’m not thinking straight.

  29. I don’t think that mine would be anything hilarious, but when you need someone desperately because you love that special someone so much, you’d be there for that special person anytime he or she needs you. You’d let people know that they’re yours, mind you.. only yours.. and you’d walk to every corner of the world for them 🙂
    that’s what you would do if you’re desperate to be with that person.

  30. oh my gosh! i want the white chocolate! i’ll even pay for shipping to singapore. 😛
    yes. there is a desperate addict in my life. some of the other bloggers know about this tale.
    a year ago, someone emailed me. apparently he was someone i knew in primary school, someone i knew briefly for less than a year. he emailed me claiming that he has been searching for me non-stop for 10 years now.
    he kept sending me weird emails, sounding very desperate to meet up and ‘talk’. apparently, he could only think of me day and night and he couldnt get me out of his mind for all these years and kept asking if i ever miss him or think about him.
    he emailed saying he has a girlfriend, for about 3 – 4 years now but all he could think about was me.
    and he sends me many many many emails. i replied his emails with one sentence kind of replies and yet he doesnt get it. one day, i stopped replying and he replied to me sounding very ‘mental’ asking me if i would rather:
    1) die for him or
    2) he dies for me
    and that he thinks im avoiding him and he thought he saw me on the train and kept asking me if i still stay where i used to then.
    from his friendster pictures, he seems really happy with his girlfriend and i dont get it why he is so ‘crazy’ over me for all these years and if he had wanted to find me, he could have via friendster a long time ago.
    having a desperate addict that you do not know, aint that bad. but having a desperate addict that you know is even worse.
    i sent him an email telling him that its unhealthy to obsess about me when he has a girlfriend and he was only an acquintance to me and to be honest, i have never thought of him.
    the thing is..
    till now he still sends me emails. i just delete them.
    and i hope to god, i will never bump into him. especially since..
    he stays near me.

  31. abit of the topic
    but kuching’s famos kolo mee
    has come to Spore at an outlet
    jia xiang kuching kolo mee pte ltd opens
    in november at vivocity basement2
    next to kopitiam food court
    after reading so much abt it
    damm it, it better taste good
    or is it acquired taste?
    any way does not make diff in spore
    we eat it with lots of chilli paste
    mix it until red red, any taste left
    over the numbing tongue is extra

  32. I love Japan and their cultural alot… and I started to learn Japanese in SXX HXX company last year Julai which this company provides Japanese language course… And this is the place I meet him – My Japanese Teacher a.k.a Yap. He’s so funny and humourous since me and my friends attend the first class of his. Me which love life is ZERO that time, addicted to him and fall for him seriously after a few months of knowing him. Then every week the day I couldn’t waits for it’s arrival is WEDNESDAY(because this is the day we learn Japanese) and I would make-up and dress nicely just to impress him! My 2 friends know about this and we often talk alot about him in schools XD (for our own entertainment). Yap is 31 years old this year and he lives at KLANG!!! OMG!!! SO FAR FROM WHERE I LIVE!!! And our teacher-students relatinship started to become closer when we all hang out after class to have a cup of tea every week. Eventually I get to know he still have his girlfriend’s photo in his NEW PHONE, and he still have his heart to her. Everything I did (dress nicely bla bla bla…) was wasted… Then I started sms with him, trying to know him more through sms… and some personality test of course. I could sms him 7 different personality test questions just to know him more! Aiks… Silly me…Teacher wouldn’t tell anything private to students right? including what he do, where he go, what he lkes… I would go to Bangsar MidValley shopping Mall and sit at the McDonald near the cinema there just to wait see miracle happens or not to let me see him(because he likes to watch movie with his friends and he just love to go MidValley Megamall)! Just a glance is enough for me! And you know what? March 13th, I really saw him with his friends! walking to the car park! I quickly called him up and say I saw him at Midvalley, but that time he already started his car engine… aiks, no dinner together (T_T)…and there was another one… Guessing that he uses his own name to register for telephone and internet service, I search in the YELLOW PAGES CUSTOMER LIST just wanted to know his ADDRESS!!! AND GUESS WHAT!? I FOUND IT! WHOLE ADDRESS written down inside! I was so happy that time!!! And the next day was weekend, after tuition, I went to Klang ALONE BY MYSELF! Purchasing ticket was the most desperate time to make decision… Then take the KTM, station by station pass by… I arrive Klang at 5pm… After I depart… I was totally blank in my mind… Not daring to ask anyone, I walk to the city according to the road sign. I cross the Klang River and hope that one of his car can pass by that busy road. I stand beside the road for 1 hours, searching for his car… I couldn’t see any sign of him… That time I was so lost and so don’t know what to do…I went to Klang Parade… Went to the Klang bus Station… Went to any place that could gather people… trying to search for him… But Miracle won’t happen twice isn’t? I use my memory to remember the road back to KTM station, I was so sad… After that incident, my friends all know about this secret trip, they call me a SUPERWOMAN! (LOL) hahahaha… I won’t give up on something which have on answer, then I decided to let this Japanese teacher know that I Love Him at his birthday. I called him up right after 12am to wish him happy birthday, I was so nervous that time and we only talk crap, talk about movies… then this first phone calls ended. I couldn’t sleep at all! I wanted to tell him! Tell him I Like Him!!! Then, i give courage to myself, and I press the recall button, and gave him another call… He pick up the phone, I told him I have something I haven’t tell him yet… which is… I Like You!!! OMG! AWKWARD SILENCE! He keeps on err… and err… and err… Without knowing what to do or say, I just laugh and say aiya! Don’t be so cold to me ma!!!! After a few hahahaha, I wish him good night and then we hang up. Aiks, that was the most terrible and mizerable time! After a few mins, I receive his sms, he say it’s good to have courage to make confession to someone you like, but really sorry I’m not the one for you. Hope you can be brave like this next time you meet someone you like! Awww~ Isn’t this the nature of teacher? Hahahaha… Still have to tell me some lessons before relly ends this relationship. Luckily that time we ended our Japanese lessons, so since May 2006, we haven’t contact each other until now…

  33. if one steals your uncle’s prized carnation to give to a girl on valentine’s day, would that qualify as interest, or lack of it?
    or maybe i just look like his mom. hmms.

  34. Long story~
    There was this guy I knew back then when I was 17 and I knew him thru tuition classes and he’s just pure weird which makes me hate him.
    And to sum it all up, below is what KT had done…
    1. Called me 2 days before SPM and asked if I have the SPM questions. this is when I was still 17.
    2. Called me and tell me that he liked me even though he knows that he shouldn’t even like me… and when I told him I liked someone else he hung up my call and call back the very next day and told me not to tell him such things.
    3. Shouted my full name infront of my house gate. Coz I was having my shower then I didn’t hear him and he called to verify that I’m at home and question me why didn’t I answer him when he shouted for me. Thank god parents wasnt home
    4. When I left for college, KT came over to my house looking for me! dad was at home and he actually dared to ask for me… and my dad told him that I’ve already left for college over in other state…by then I was already 19…
    5. KT When to the college next to mine and enrol to study there and enter my college every now and then and start asking around if anyone knows me…
    6. When he manage to find me, we agree to just maintain as friend, so we talked again until one day i had to tell him off “KT, forget me, you and me impossible coz I’ll be leaving to NZ for my study soon” and weird KT replied “I’ll go over to your house now and tell your mom not to let you go NZ and then I’ll give her dowry to marry you” that’s when I hang up the phone!!
    7. Last and final contact with KT was when I was talking KT about assignment and to enter his college to borrow books from library and KT started shouting on the phone “I LOVE YOU! I LOVE YOU! I LOVE YOU!” that totally scares me and decided that no way I wanna continue being friends with such weirdo

  35. Im your typical pathetic loser.
    It happened when i was in form 2. There was this girl that i really liked P. At that point, being young and naive, i thought that love was easy.
    I guess she was toying with the fact that i liked her, her friends as well as mine knew about this one way relationship.
    why?
    coz i was sort of like her boyfriend. Thats it. She wasnt my girlfriend.
    well, being young and naive, i thought that i had her in the bag. Thoughts or marriage and nonsense.
    Anyway, she forced me to do things for her. Now thinking back, i was pretty dumb to oblige to everything.
    She wanted to eat ipoh hor fun during reccess one day. When i say ipoh, i mean ipoh. I sneaked out of school, took a taxi to pudu raya, got a bus, went to ipoh, bought the hor fun, came back to kl. By then, it was night already. Called her, she said she didnt want it anymore.
    It was a saturday night, she called me. Said she wants me to go to her house to make a cup of milo for her. So i walked to her house (her house was in the other neighbourhood), ringed the doorbell, guess what? Her dad came out holding a police like baton threatening to kill me. He didnt believe me when i told him her daughter asked me to come over. He said his daughter would never befriend a guy like me and she was already asleep. Got into alot of trouble with my parents when i got home.
    On monday, i enquired her about it. She slapped me across the face. During assembly, i was left hurt and ashamed.
    From that day ’till today, we have not spoken. I thought obliging to her wishes would make her accept me. Guess not.
    So, do you agree that im a pathetic loser?
    Im sure you are nodding frantically now.

  36. In order to visit my boyfriend in Europe while i was studying in Melbourne, i had to save up significantly.
    I worked part-time for a year in a Fish and Chips shop at minimum wage; lived on minimal spending (and i mean minimal); didn’t shop for clothes/shoes/bags/accesories for a year; let my hair grow out for 6 months straight; hardly ever a cup of coffee (AUD 3 was a LUXURY to spend); even restricted on outings with friends.
    I was a lost cause.

  37. Hmm..A LG phone for my personal story.Quite a good deal. Ok..lets start. During my Form 3, there was this girl juz came to my school in my class. At 1st, i never pay much attention to her until after PMR, where we have nothing to do, she stick to with the guys gang which is my gang.We waste our time by playing cards n board games. Then all of suddent, doesnt knowing where the urge camed from, I suddently told her i like her. Then she din say anything. Btw, she was one of my class prettiest gal and i’m not that good looking+fat. So, with her saying nothing, i stupidly thought she said yes. So, i stick to her everyday.I even call her during the nite n chat with her.
    Then, until Form 4, where we enter the same class coincidently, then she sat with the guy eveeryday. Of coz la i unhappy but never said anything becoz i’m the type without self confident. what to say when i not even good looking n fat. Then during her birthday,i spend 3weeks folding paper stars for her.Wat to do?trying to impress her mah.. Times flew n Its end of FOrm 4. We barely talk thru out the yr. THen one day, she told me she’s going to change school. She brought some home made cookies for the class but i wasn’t around at that moment so i dint have the chance to enjoy it. She told me that i’m unlucky bcoz cant taste her cookies. So i stupidly went home n ask my bro’s GF who study bakery to teach me how to bake some cookies. I made it and gave it to her next day. I wrapped it tightly n ask her to open it when she reach home. She did what i said n at nite, she gave me a call and said Thank You. Now when i think of it, i felt stupid. So, i continue my Form 5 life without her…
    Until End of SPM, where we were busy chosing our college to enroll in, i met her and ask her where is she planning to study. She told me Lim Kok Wing institute. I was like..shit..i wanted to go there but i dowan to meet her as i want to forget her. So, instead of LKW, i went to Taylors..thinking i will be able to forget her. Then on the orientation day, God must be playful at that moment. I saw her there once more. SO, i asked her why is she there n she said she just enrolled into taylors. I dunno i shud be happy or sad tat time. After the ice breaking session, our class will be announce soon. GUess wat..among the 8 class of few hundred students, she is in my class. So, i accepted the facts that God is naughty. 1 semester of 3months, i barely talk n sit near her until the end of semester 1, she told me she’s changing course. Once again in my life, she’s leaving me again. She didnt left too far..shes’ still in the same college but different course. Until now which my Semester 3 going to end, I still meet her once a while bumping into her during lunch.I treated her like strangers bcoz everytime i met her, i just cant speak..It never happen to other girls..Only her. Thts all..I swear everything is true here. 😛

  38. Im not good in writting english,but I already try my best!
    I was born in a quite poor family.We are not rich so my father have to work so hard and to save money.Although we had financial problem,but i never complain.
    I remember once,my mother need a big sum of money for a personal things.But my father cant afford it.
    So, thay have a big quarrel.I was very sad because i cant do anything to help my mother.
    So, i decided to find a part time job and hope can solve my parents problem.
    I found it at a restaurant near my house.It is called WEST WINGS but i think it close down already.
    I have to walk to work everyday from 10am to 11pm.I even fall sick for several times.I was so desperate but what can i do?
    Im just want to help my mother.
    Luckily,that time was my school holiday.
    When i received my salary,i hand it to my mother.
    I was so happy although my salary not much.
    I hope my story can tell you how desperate I am to own a brand new handphone.Im already 17 years old but still using the old 8250nokia until today.So,hope i can win it by this lousy written story.

  39. I was desperate all right. Ummmm so was he!
    It was my first time ever going to a dance party. I really wanted to impress this guy. Had a crush on him for what seemed like ages! So when he finally recipocrated and invited me to this dance party, I jumped at it, begging my parents to let me go.
    With giddy anticipation, I practised my moves in front of the mirror. I had to endure the chuckles and giggles of my younger sisters and even the household help!
    Finally THE evening came. He was “chauffer driven” by his older brother – he couldnt drive yet. In seventh heaven, we went to this party. His friends were milling around, looking at me through the corner of their eyes…. I really had to make a good impression!!!
    The lights dimmed and a slow number started. That was ok. Just hang on to him (hmmmm nice!) and let the bodies sway.
    Then the music switched to something faster. This was where all my practising would pay off!
    As the song went on, I watched my beau. He was wriggling in a most awkward way.
    My face went red, and it wasnt from the effort of dancing! It was downright embarassing!
    Finally I burst out “WHAT are you doing?!”
    His answer?
    “Following you”!!!!!!!
    – – – – – – – – – – – –
    Pity you having to read thru all this stuff.

  40. The seller told me that the touch screen keypad on the front of this phone is so sensitive and a lot of time, will lost its function and highly not recommended. The review said that the Samsung ones is better! Almost the same as this model anyway…

  41. OMIGOSH! MY REAL NAME SHOWS!
    This is how desperate I am! I have never posted on this blog before and now that I have, I have put my real name into the space….. *blush*

  42. i’d linger around the school just to meet him by ‘coincidence’. i typed his name in google, in yahoo search, in msn search just to find whether he has a blog or not. in the end of search mostly i’d find his names from MY blog. His pictures online were all downloaded to my floppy disk, last time. now i have a stack of albums in my CDR. i liked him for 6 years since primary. that time i printed the icq chat history and i’m still keeping it now. I added all his school friends in my MSN list, try to tackle or just do anything to feel that i’m related to him. I’d wait for him to message me in ICQ, a message was like 30 minutes per hour, because he was playing some online games. till he left, it was like 3 a.m.. I walked to his house to send him his birthday present, i got barked by his huge black dog, it still frightens me now and then, i wish it’ll die fast, urgh. when i was 13 i would just pull my cousin together with me and linger around in front of his house. pity my cousin. in the end of this very freaky story, i’ve made alot of friends from his school, got famous because of that and got myself a boyfriend from that school, but the boyfriend isn’t him.

  43. My boyfriend set off the alarm in my school so that everyone will be running for their life.He just want some time with me on my birthday.He brought me a cake,however he threw it at the teacher who caught him with me and ran away.I was in deep trouble for being alone with him.

  44. 2 friends of mine, A and B, fell for the same guy, C. They did all kinda stuff to get his attention, from valentine gifts, a handphone for a birthday present and even supporting him during his occasional performances. I was unlucky to be caught in the middle as C was also my best friend. I had to pass the messages and presents to him and boy was I annoyed.
    A was so obsessed, she had saved all of C‘s friendster pictures into her computer, made them into a wallpaper just to see him everyday. B printed out a picture of C and kept it in her purse as a good luck charm.
    As time passed, things got more drastic as A started passing out rumours about B that were just too hard to bare. B got so upset and depressed, she passed another rumour on A. That time, it was the ultimate b*tchfight I had ever seen.
    I couldn’t take it anymore and confronted C to just tell them what he felt and just end the whole massacre. He agreed.
    He got both of them together and what do you know? He confessed as being gay and already has a boyfriend.
    Both girls were so embarrased and angry they started scolding C and left after that. Few days later, everything cooled down and A and B were friends again.
    Sometimes, I just don’t understand girls.

  45. *cough*
    I like free stuff.
    Getting free stuff gives me an erection.
    mmm..
    Yes , where was I ? Right , erection.
    No wait wrong , free gift .
    Not to digress further I shall continue with my story . This happened to me back when I was in Form 2 or 3 .. I think.
    So anyways , it was after school and I was walking to Amcorp Mall from my school . So as I walked up the escalator , I saw this huge chick behind me and she was my ex girlfriend’s close friend . I wanted to greet her but I was in too much of a rush
    So anyways , I realized she was sort of tailing me. When I turned around she hid behind the pillar.

    Wait , sorry.
    Let me rephrase that , the pillar hid infront of her . Because technically , she’s bigger than the pillar . Imagine the pillar as a straw and her as a cup.
    I chuckled , and continued because I was rushing . 5 minutes later , she messaged me and said
    “Vince , I saw you in amcorp . What a coincidence”
    ..Oh wow.
    3 weeks later , my friend called me and told me that the prefects of a school found a stack of my photos in her desk.
    No not those camwhored ones. But pictures of my basically walking , scratching my ass
    ..
    Man.

  46. There was once i was joking aorund with my friend that i like her.Then i end up falling in love with ehr after some time.I remembered that during one of her birthday,i planned out the whole thing and wait in mid valley at 8am just to make sure i will get the movie tickets and go to every single shopping malls to look for one thing she like. I went to times square,sungai wang and the area there,one utama,klcc and mid valley to look for that thing.Spend the whole day walking form floor to floor and shop to shop coz it’s so hard to find.Finally i found it in 1u but it was closed that day because i asked the shop next to it and they said they closed every friday.Darn it!Anyway,the thing i was looking for was ‘boo’ from monster inc.

  47. How does a guy get an attention of a girl?..Flowers?..Chocolates?..Dinner?..Movie?…
    Well, mine took a less conventional method of catching my attention.
    It was during a cross fire, we were on the opposite team. I was running forward to attack the enemy…Then *phow*…
    “Dang!..I’m shot!I’m shot!”…I had to retire from my battlefield.
    He shot me at paintball which left me with a huge bruise on my leg for weeks!..No skirts and shorts for weeks!..
    Several months after that, “Cupid’s arrow..erm pallet” worked it charms…;)

  48. I walked in a weird style for more than a year cos i desperatley liked a guy that i followed/copied/practiced his weird walking style (dragging feet when walking and dragging finger on closest wall he was walking to) just to have the feeling that we were the same “type”.
    i succeeded in copying him but failed to attract him.

  49. I grew up in high school with this girl.
    She was cute and kind hearted.
    Being the idiotic teen male I was, I would bully her and make fun of her at every single given oppurtunity.
    It was one of the only ways to interact with her I thought of at that time.
    I remember using the chalk duster to dirty her chair and when she sat and stood her Butt Would Be All White ! Then as she dusts the white chalk off her skirt I would yell “HEY STOP TOUCHING YOUR BUTT !”
    Then the whole class would laugh and she would beat me and chase me around. 🙂
    I would scare her with cockroaches.. rats..not to torture her, but her yelling and running away was too cute to watch.
    Stupid, but that was the only way I could get her attention.
    Then at one point I realized my foolishness and tried to confess my feelings.
    I decided to do it in a form of a puzzle.
    I would leave a letter in her desk every single morning, (before anyone came to class), and the whole letter would spell out “Will you be my girlfriend? (my name)”
    I did it for a month. She was very suprised about this mysterious person. And I talked to her about probable ways to solve the puzzle as a third person.
    In the end she ended up with some trashy sentences that meant nothing and I felt so stupid for my wasted effort. I admitted my feelings then, and was suprised that she had a crush on me as well. (I had no idea how and why)
    I arranged the letters for her, and she gave me the cutest smile I have ever seen in my life. It was worth it, cutting letters from newspapers and secretly handing it to her every morning for a month.
    Hell, if I knew it was that easy I would’ve went ahead and confessed in the first place ! I learned that you shouldn’t hold back in Love, just go for it before it’s too late or your balls will start to shrink.
    I’m a desperate addict for love. 🙂
    Regards from Roy.

  50. from the age of 12-18 i had a super duper major crush on this girl.
    every year, i would go through this routine of courting her.
    i would send an anonymous letter, and a beautiful gift to her.
    i’d send at least 3-4 of these ‘packages’ and would finally reveal my ‘true identity’ to express my love to her.
    sometimes i did it more than once in a year.
    i was always so romantic. so perfect. and my gifts were so amazing.
    but unfortunately, i wasn’t her type, and she never excepted me.
    i was frustrated with myself for a while, but couldn’t get over the fact that i could never ever be with her.
    so one night, before she left for overseas, i decided to be an ass..
    so i flamed her on my blog.
    her auntie got mad at me, and left hate messages on my blog.
    uptill now, i haven’t spoken to her. me and her will never be a couple. confirm ..

  51. I used to have this massive crush on this guy back in secondary school (I was 14). How did I turn into a desperate addict? I was going to school and found this little kitten in the school compound.
    Don’t ask me what it was doing there! FATE! So, me being sorry for the poor frail kitty, decided to take the kitten to me to class to see if anybody would like to adopt it. Mind you! animals were strictly not allowed in a Malaysian Secondary school ok?
    So he came over and asked me if I found the cat. And I said yea. And THAT was it! So psychotic right? He had me at “U found..” (the kitten?).
    Going on to the Jerry Mcguire vibe, he ‘completed’ me for what seems like ETERNITY after that. I spied, I stalked, I talked to myself about him. Because I was so obsessed and couldn’t let everyone know what a desperate addict I was, I, at one point, was having conversations with myself about him! Like two girls gossiping, except that it was just me talking. -.-
    Something like this:
    “Wa..he’s very cute la *sigh*”
    “Where got? Alot of people think he doesn’t look that great what..”
    “WHAT DO YOU MEAN?! *getting pissed, at myself*
    “okla okla, he is QUITE cute I can’t deny that..”
    “QUITE?! QUITE?! CAn yOu PLeASE rePHRASe THAT?!”
    “OK OK! HE’s CUTE!”
    Teenage hormones can do alot of stupid things to u.
    I thought of him constantly and everytime I saw him, my heart would skip a beat. I put our names or birthdays in the Love Calculator thingy and if the results were not 95% or above, I’d tweak the name or the date abit till I got the answer I wanted. I kept all photos of him that I could get my hands on and would stare at them for the longest time just dreaming that he knew I existed.
    I memorised his car plate number, his address (drove past his house a few times just for kicks), his family members, his parent’s age and occupation, his telephone number, his birthday, and even his sibling’s birthdays. I may be able to give it all to you now off the back of my head if you ask nicely =P When I bump into his family members, I’d look down and avoid eye contact, as if they knew who I was.. *cringe*
    I kept a diary where I wrote all my sightings of him for the day. What he was wearing, what he was doing (even when he combed his hair back with his hand), who he was with, what did I manage to eavesdrop from his conversations. When permitting, I would even put how far he was from me (closer than 1 m would be damn exciting stuff!) I think I still have the diary sitting somewhere..LOL
    I even wrote a letter that I imagined I would send to him and signed it off with my own blood. Well, I didnt make myself bleed on purpose for the letter, I accidentally cut myself and thought why waste the blood.
    I called him up in the middle of the day when I knew he was home and let him pick up the phone, where I’d just keep quiet just to hear him say hello again, aggitated. Then I’d hang up.
    Fortunately, I didn’t turn out as bad as all of you might assume. I do not have a psychiatric record nor a criminal record, as of yet. But the last time I heard bout him, he’s not exactly the picture of mental health either. I heard he’s a freak, albeit still a cute one.
    I cringe when I look back..I’m actually cringing now typing all this down. This is a 100% true story!I promise kennY!
    Now can I pretty-pretty please get the pretty phone? =) email: oink.oink84@gmail.com

  52. There’s this guy, named CWK, who was after me. Here are some of his desperate attempts:
    (1) During one of the pasar malam nite at my taman, he bought all the petai from one of the pasar malam stalls. Then he ate all the hardcore raw petai right in front of my eyes. Took him almost 2 hours to finish all. Why petai?? Well, he asked one of my friends, what do I like to eat?? My genius friend just blurted out PETAI. He was just lucky that my friend didn’t say shit. And I hate petai the most.
    (2) There’s this one day that he kept coming to my house with the excuse of borrowing toilet because he claimed that the toilet at his house rosak already. He came every freaking 30mins or so to my house just to borrow toilet. And he used it less than a second. His house is in the other taman, which is quite far from my house.
    (3) He invited himself to dinner at my house one nite. So, me and my housemates had no choice but to eat with him since he had bought all the fooods for us. Out of sudden, he just pretended that he was choking on his food. Expecting me to go to his rescue. Too bad, my other hsemate rescued him. How I knew that he was pretending?? Because when my other hsemate rescued him, he straight said that he’s ok, and continue eating like a pig.
    (4) There’s this one time, he came over to me and told me something like this: I’m actually from China. I came here illegally…..(lots of boring explanation here that I’ve forgotten). This is the funniest part: Would you marry me?? Because if you don’t marry me, I will be forced back to China where I will be seriously abused by my aunt. Please marry me!! I answered him NO, and walked off.
    (5) This is the most extreme attempt by him: He camped right outside of my house for 4 days and 4 nights. Neighbors looked at all of us one kind already. I have to call police to halau him away, after all the reasoning and soft-talking failed.
    So, that’s it. Until today I still wonder where on earth he got all his ideas from. I don’t know where is he now, for after the camping incident, police had warned him not to come near me anymore. I was given a letter from the police/court regarding this. Later, all of us moved from there because we just couldn’t stand that kind-of-stare that our neighbors were giving us.
    God bless whoever-his-future-gf is. Sicko!!

  53. Hi :{
    I’m in this weird mood today, but I think your topic fits purrr-fectly into the feelings that I have now.
    4 years ago, after a “heavy heart break” with another guy that I’ve met online, I got to know my current boyfriend on mIrc. We immediately got together within a week, but I wasn’t serious at that point. He “attacked” me at my weakest point. So, tell me, which girl wouldn’t take up the offer (furthermore I’m not really pretty nor am I a hot babe)?
    2 months past. Shit. I’m now slowly falling for this guy. Whom I did not know who he was, whom I had clueless idea of friends that he have and who were his family members.
    Then, one fine day, he had high fever and I got so worried. Bear in mind that we were in a long distance relationship at that time. The only thing that I could do as a gf was to call and check on him once every half hour. Results? He was better after a day or two, but he said things like “I’m not sure if I’m able to accept you as ‘who’ you are” which really did hurt me then 🙁 So size does matters sometimes.
    Then, a month later, he was asked to be the bestman for a good friend. He also asked me if I could come to find him. It would be the first time that I’m meeting this guy whom I considered my bf although I’ve never met him before (yes..for the past 4 months!) It took me alot of courage and effort to finally make my way from Malacca to Taiping. Friends were worried that I could be kidnapped or others, so one of my friend and her bf decided to drive me there personally.
    I feel in love with him immediately when I saw him. He accepted me as well. Those were sweet memories.
    Now, at this very minute, I wondered if being desperate at that point of time was the corrent thing to do.
    Dear – YES I was desperate for love then. And, I still do now. I wished you made more effort for me all these while. I wished I did not have to wait downstairs at your apartment, trying to wake you up on your mobile by leaving 40+ miss calls and waited about 2 hours in the car. I wished all the small little things that I’ve done for you was worth every little bit of it.I love you very much, but it hurts. What should I do?
    I’m desperate for love, so therefore I’ll probably hang on. Just like the song StickWitU by Pussycat Dolls:
    I don’t wanna go another day
    So I’m telling you, exactly what is on my mind
    Seems like everybody is breaking up
    And throwing their love away
    But I know I got a good thing right here
    That’s why I say (Hey)
    Nobody gonna love me better, I must stick wit u forever
    Nobody gonna take me higher, I must stick wit u
    You know how to appreciate me, I must stick wit u, my baby
    Nobody ever made me feel this way, I must stick wit u

  54. Dear MeiMei,
    Exciting stuffs you got there. But with the pleading of phone should be handed to you makes you story “unreal” and “created”.
    Dear teamix,
    Nice desperate story. 🙂

  55. This guy who was after me drove me up the wall with his incessant text messages. He’s send me text asking, “Had you dinner? What did you eat?” At first, I replied his text out of politeness. After a week, I ignored them.
    He did not give up. Then came my birthday. He gave me a branded pen. I was kind of surprised and questioned that gift. “Give you means it’s yours lah,” was his answer. Again, as friends, I accepted it.
    Later on, he gave me creepy looks. Looked that made me feel as if he was able to invade my privacy. I tried to ignore him but it got worse. I did not feel comfortable when he is present. The last straw came when he secretly took a photo of me with his mobile phone when I wasn’t paying attention. When I confronted him, he threatened to forward it to every guy he knows.
    I told him off there and then. I wonder if he has absorbed my words.

  56. Wait KENNY SIA! My ‘desperate addict’story is coming up real soon..This is my very first time joining a competition through your blog..
    P/S : I somehow got hooked on with reading your blog eversince my sis (Flo who won the Crocs) gave me ur url..Damn, now im a desperate addict for blogs, esp your’s! *smack on the head* heh..

  57. I read your blog religiously. Unfortunately, I don’t live in malaysia so I can’t win the phone, funny story or not. In anycase, if you wanna see “desperate addicts”, try poking your head into a singaporean secondary school. Boys show their desperation by, uh, doing nothing OR writing grammatically flawed love notes to girls they have a crush on, who happen to be, yes, gramma nazi’s.
    Uhm dude, when you say desperate addicts, do you mean they enjoy being desperate since they’re addicted to it? Or they develop a terminal annoyance as a result of being desperate…
    LG PHONE…………!!!! I swear, the Koreans make better and better phones everyday.

  58. kenny,i really need it,my phone just spoilt yesterday,then lucky i visit your post just now.i want it like my breath,i cant live without phone.
    I now studying in UTAR.I don’t get ptptn(gov loan),need to work.I really need this phone because my home at kedah.I study in kl,pj.My grand mum alone at kampung there.I wish to call her every night,since yesterday,i cant call her.I believe she is now really worry about me.
    I can go as far then sg. wang(beause there have a lot ‘wang’).I really despriate of it,to show you my honours,i write a poem for you.
    My lovely fatty kenny,
    god will always bless you,
    now i don’t have any penny,
    wish you show to my grand mum the good of you.

    good nite!
    (sorry to my poor english).

  59. OKAY. YOURE GONNA THINK IM FREAKING WEIRD AFTER THIS. BUT JUST HEAR ME OUT, AND DONT DO IT YOURSELF, COS IT DOSENT WORK.
    okay, so im totally in love with this guy right. no wait, hes a GOD. he is a fucking GOD.
    first day i meet him, he looks like a GOD. he even has rings of purple around his head, just like buddha does, but even brighter. he was working at this restaurant. and i didnt know what to do when i saw him. he was just the greatest thing i had ever seen. like, his hotness was insane crazy insane that i felt scared to even touch him in case i got burnt with his hotness. TSS. so, the next day i go back and i ask for a job. they werent giving one away, so i told them that i am actually from THE STAR newspaper doing a cover on “minimum wage in malaysia and it’s effects on modern globalization” i had no fucking idea what it blinking meant, but to the owner, it sounded impressive so he signed me up for a week. AHHHHAHAHH! i was estatic. so, i managed to talk to the guy. his voice was like.. ok, his voice sounded like BUDDHA+JESUS+BRAD+OPRAH all mixed into one. his words were like.. seriously i dont even remeber what he said to me, but he definately wasnt interested in me. as muched as i want to hope and pray he definately wasnt. i worked as a waiter, and he was behind the bar. i found out a few things about him, his email, phone number and ADDRESS. hoho. i am a professional lover/stalker now. i hardly ever spoke to him, i just searched the restaurant’s computer for his details. sometimes, im even scared of breathing near him. i dont wanna take up his sacred oxygen. that will cause a serious unbalance to the world’s extinct population of hottness. so after a week, i had to leave. but, i had his address!!!! and his number.. =O the same night i left my ‘cover job’ i went to mph and bought this book about witchcraft. i then made a spell for love. the ingredients and actions were stupid as hell, but what the heck. i had to go out at 2. am to seven 11 and buy two packets of condoms. the book said that it was so that it will bless my future mind blowing sex with the guy. if that was the case, ill gladly buy every condom in malaysia. so, i got the ingredients and burnt them, and then went to his house and spread the ashes on his front porch. his cat was sleeping on the top of his car, so i chucked some ash on it’s fur as well. the next thing i did was call him. i dont know why i called him, i didnt dare ask him out or anything, but i just wanted him so bad.
    so basically, this was our conversation.
    me: HEY!!
    guy: hello.
    me: hi hi!
    silence..
    guy; err.. who;s dis?
    me: oh! sorry! i am from the ministry of the city council. (wth does that mean???)
    guy: oh.. ok. what can i do for you?
    me: we are running a project that needs curent and accurate statistics from our community. i would like to ask you about your local.. local.. indian temple.
    guy: what?
    me; err. local indian temple.
    guy: err. ok.
    me: so, does the burning and smoke from the temple distrub you at all?
    guy: no.
    me: does the smell from the coconut milk irritate you?
    guy: err. no.
    me: how do you feel about free food that is given to the poor at the temple?
    guy: i think it is good.
    me: so, how do you feel about sex before marrige?
    guy: what??
    me: thank you. goodbye.
    and ill put down the phone.
    i did that only once. i didnt dare call back in case he recognised my voice.
    i also took photos of him working in the restaurant, and i printed it out on stickers, and every night, before i sleep, i stick a sticker on my lucky birth mark that is on my right buttock.
    i have no idea what sort of music he likes, so i send him different cd’s every two weeks. i write a note on it saying it is from hit’s f.m. or just crap something.
    you know how u see in the movies, when your boyfriend’girlfriend wants to surpirse you at night when you are sleeping. so, i wanted to do that for him. he didnt know we at all, and it might be a lil creepy for him seeing a person he does not know at all below his window. but i dont care. i just had to do it. ive seen it so many times in the movies, i just had to try it! so, i bought a bunch of red roses and candles and a fat big red ribbon. and i waited until it was 3.00 a.m. and then went to his house. and i tied the ribbon wround my waist. (I AM THE PRESENT. hoho.) and lit the candles and held the bunch of roses. then i took the pebbles from the road and threw it at the first window i saw, which was right of the house door. (I HAD NO IDEA WHICH ONE WAS HIS WINDOW) i threw a small one first, but the window was too far and too high. so i figured if i threw a heavier one, by some bloody physics miracle+ calculation, the energy would add up and cause the pebble to travel further. i threw a couple of times but missed. i kept on hitting the grail. so, i threw the last time and the bloody pebble hit his window and blinking made a hole through it. it didnt crack and break the whole window. it just made a hole in it. the lights went on, and i started freaking out. i ran, leaving the roses and the candles behind, with the stupid ribbon on my waist i ran.
    i tihnk that pretty much sums up how much of an idiot i am. but i am so in love with him. maybe it is just lust. but i want him so bad! after a couple of weeks, i walked by the restaurant and saw him with his hands over a girl, laughing like she had just made the world’s most fantastic joke. -.- there isnt much space left to type, but i sorta found out where she lived. she had a tank of fish and a cute shih-tzu on her porch. i climbed over the gate in the middle of the night. (THANK BLOODY GOD THERE IS NO SENSOR ALARM. I TESTED FIRST BY THROWING TOILET ROLLS OVER THE GATE) i gave the dog a hair cut.. hahha. like a ridiculous haircut. and then i pulled two of her fishes out of the tank and brought it home with me. it case they ever do get married, i will cook the fish and eat it to their celebration.

  60. I came across with “kennysia” last year when my friend told me about the existing of this so call Kuching’s blogger who wrote so well. I paid no attention (coz I think: it’s nothing wad, just a blogger, I don’t have so much time to pay visit either) to this name until lately. Two months ago I came across with this name again and I started to visit kennysia.com. And u know wad? The first day, I read one post, the second day, I still read one post, the 3rd day, I read 2 post, 4th day-3 post…. And it continues until I spent whole day reading kennysia’s history. And finally I managed to finish it all within a week, but too bad, I can’t access those protected post… I asked for the password but I think my mail was dropped into the deep blue sea when he went to New Zealand. Anyway, u think it’s easy to do so oh,…. I’m still a uni student who’s busy with final year project, mountains of assignments/books to finish…. But wad to do…. There’s just a desperate addict…

  61. When I was still in F.3. I was classmates with this boy N. Now N was obsessed with my friend S. He would stalk her even to her part time job! He even bought her hp number off a guy for RM5 a digit. When her birthday approached he did the unthinkable. He went up to her on his knee’s and sang “eye’s on me” (final fantasy’s theme) and presented her a teddy bear, some mechaical pencils and a pair of earrings like he was proposing to her. Luckily only a few ppl were present and S walked off cooly leaving a shocked N behind…. But did N give up? NOOOOOO he continued his stalking until S’s “brother’s” knocked some sense into him.
    Currently N is obessing over Anime Girl’s.

  62. I was an addict to depression. How? U see, love songs were a hit during high school period and they have otten all over me during that time. So, in order to really enjoy and “feel” the emotion, I get myself into relationships and made sure that I was really in love with that guy.. until when it reaches climax, i’ll make the guy break up with me and i’ll start crying… that’s why I felt that love songs were my companions and not friends. After I got over with the guy, I’ll start the cycle all over again. I thought love songs were everything in my life.
    In order to win a guy’s heart, I was willing to do anything. In my opinion, guys cannot resist temptation. And so, I started to seduce to whoever I think that I wanted to own.
    I remembered writing a love letter to this guy whom I thought that I love so much. I wrote him a few pages of love letter and post it to him. I remembered I told him that I will only let him go if he found someone better than me. In the end, 4 yrs later, he wanted to come back to me and I regretted what I wrote. Damn damn regret.
    Thinking back on the past, I was silly.

  63. I don’t think my story is half as interesting as any of the above but.. its worth a shot.
    Mr Kenny Sia.. The only thing i’m addicted to other than shopping and eating is reading your blog. Ever since the first time i read your blog.. I thought that you were a super super funny person. After that i went to read most of your entries in your archives and slowly i became addicted to your blog.Your sense of humour..your style of writing..your wisdom(relative to your age)..your success.. all of those have made me become addicted to kennysia.com.. I would check your blog everyday even though I had a lot to do… because your blog lights up my day(when its a funny post.. if its a sad post i’ll be sad too..) I am a shy and quiet person and i never would have entered such competitions.. your blog (and the beauty of the phone..) have inspired me to write in when its way past my bedtime.. so.. i really really hope i can get the phone….

  64. I was so into my lecturer but i didnt know how to tell him during that time. He’s 4 years older than me.
    I was so lazy back then. I seldom do my work and all. However, da previous semester he was my lecturer, and i swear that was the most tutorial record i had in my 4 years uni life.
    XD
    I look for him for tutorial every single chance i had with him. And we got so close that my classmates even said that we were flirting. (that i’m not sure, perhaps it’s just me ;p)
    Now, we’re as close as friends. He’s not my lecturer anymore however we still hang out.
    yay.

  65. when i started dating my bf, i find that he still keeps in contact with his ex or to say his ex LOVES to contact him. i didn’t mind at first but after a few times i realise the ex seems to enjoy talking about their past. being paranoid like always, i started to check on her.
    i would stalk her friendster profile every single day. scrutinise every picture she has. analyse every single blog entry she posted. comparing myself to her. man.. i would spend hours everyday just doing that!
    things got worse when somehow i got hold of her passwords (*coughs* dont ask me how i did but i did). i would spend hours reading through her emails, checking through her phone bill statements, looking at the photos in her inbox. hell, i would even go through her pictures in her multiply site. i am practically a cyber stalker who is obsessed with her life!
    anyway, after talking through with my bf, i think it was silly of me to get so upset and psycho over this ex. and sad to say, it took me a year to get over it. such a waste of my precious time and the person who got hurt the most was me (reading through all those crappy emails of her was a pain – esp when it was the “unintentional” email of “hi, im jealous cos u have a new gf”). sigh. how stupid was i. well, just a story of my desperate addiction towards a bf’s ex. zzz.

  66. The desperate Egyptian man.
    Well first of all, this story is about my friend.
    She was on a holiday trip with her family to Egypt. So being us Malaysian, we wear what we like, nothing too revealing and nothing too closed up. Furthermore knowning that Egypt is a hot area, we tend to wear less cloth for our own comfort. So okay lah, she and her family was visiting the Pyramid’s of Giza when a huge flock of man came flooding towards her. They were crazy over her, some even proposed to her saying that they will give her camels, other try to out do another by giving a slightly better proposal.
    Really desperate lor. See asian girl with so much cloth on her already goo goo gah gah all over her. Seriously desperate lor. Imagine if it was an ang moh, with big neh neh and wearing more revealing cloths. I think they fight until someone die also they don’t mind man.
    Seeing a lady dress in so little cloth on the streets of Egypt is like seeing rain in a dessert. Because it’s so rare. They normally wear those ninja turtle costume.
    Actually, coming to think of it, i wonder how they know if a girl is chun or not. haha..imagine judging a girls beauty through her eyes. crazy.
    Which explains how desperate people would all out just to marry

  67. NOTE: HAPPENED LAST YEAR.
    My boyfriend spent his 3months rent(apt) money to get me back and I didn’t even know about it only until we got together, but luck was on his side and we moved into a new apt(he got kicked out and we hunted for a new place to stay).
    We both paid for the rent then and things are looking good between us up until now, I have never been more in love with this desperate-addict :).

  68. Ahh.. my own experience happened three years ago when I fell for this girl I meet thru a friend… hmm..she’s hot..pretty..and everything… arghz..back to the true story.. I wanted her so much to notice me so I decided to give her flowers like anyone would and give her a big warm hug to melt her heart. I waited outside her house one really dark night and got one of her friend to ask her out, when I saw someone coming out of house and I ran up and gave her a big hug whispering I love you. But something felt wrong, whatever she was wearing that night, was sure hairy. Then I heard someone coughed and I let got of ‘her’ and realize it was her shirtless father I hugged. I end up standing there for more than an hour getting lectured by his hairy chest-ed father.

  69. lets see….i liked a guy in college and it was his birthday so i gave him a birthday card with RM50 inside for a birthday present…
    he told me he loves me but we stayed friends then suddenly…he started avoiding me online…so i started “stalking” him in college…i was desperate to clear things up if there is any misunderstanding that i tried talking to the sister…but she branded me a stalker instead…uhuh…right..
    anyway it gradually it died down then 2 years later i read a blog entry of his fren which says that this guy told him that that i gave this guy an “angpow” of RM50…as well as i was “delusional” bcoz i thought he likes me when he does not…
    he contacted me again to apologized i forgot momentarily that someone who does the disappearing act can be such as asshole…so i forgave him…then i read the entry abt a month later n i got furious!
    so i took my revenge by juz posting a comment n in it is just a short diary entry of what he wrote/sent to me…
    so now he “dissappeared” again from MSN…hahah p/s this guy is some “furious boobs” brother… =P till now he still thinks he is right… =S
    anyway his actions and story has “inspired” me to write a story (link posted in the URL column) for my writing classes n i actually got a HD for it..
    this whole incident is not hilarious actually…but amusing if u were to read the excerpt of how i imagine my punishment which i will inflict on him if i had it my way..some ppl’s behaviour r juz so ridiculous…
    now dat i sort of settled the score even…i dun give a shit anything concerning him anymore… 😉

  70. Well this is a personal experience, its pretty sad/desperate… at least i think so
    Anyway it was back in form 2 , there was this girl i really liked, liked as in ever since primary 3. So imagine i had liked her for 5 years. After mustering up all the 5 years long frustration, i finally had enough couraged to ask her out. I had it all planned out to ask her as soon as class started in the morning. So on that particular day i came early, got everything set up, made sure i had my balls with me and stuff. And then just so on that day the morning started out with a test, before i could even say anything we were already seperated to do a test.
    I’m sure many of you would know how it feels like when you are so hyped up and prepared for it, only for it to be denied or ruined. So obviously my mind was way too distracted to even care about the test i was doing. And through some sudden impulse or stupidity as some of my friends today might still say. I got out of my chair, walked up to the front of the classroom, the teacher looked at me and i turned around and started talking to the whole class.
    From the point on it was probably the most embaressing moment ever in my life. I went on to declare my affection for this particular girl while everyone was still doing their test. Everyone just paused and looked as me as though i was crazy. Of course there was a lot of laughter and when i was done i just stood there dumbstruck and telling myself “what are you doing you idiot?!”. As a result i got detention and was taken into the principal’s office for a lecture on “why i shouldn’t declare my love for someone during a test”.
    So well that’s my most desperate moment ever in my life 😛

  71. Yops.
    I’ve had a few of these kinda people. Especially in secondary school. I was a school prefect and I always had strange girls in the class I was in charge of. Once, there was this girl that I always thought was in my class. Every morning, she’d be there, waiting in queue with the rest of the girls and no one said a thing! I assumed that that was her class and I allowed it, even chidding her once or twice for talking. Only when I was posted to another class that I realised that she wasn’t in the initial class I thought she was. I was mortified. She moved to the new class I was looking after claiming that this was her real class. *smacks forehead* Time passed and she moved to another school.
    One day, she came back to visit some old mates and spotted me. I tried my level best to avoid her but she came a-knocking on my class door whilst a teacher was inside! The shock and horror. She promptly asked to talk to me and the teacher (bless her!) denied her request saying that it was in the middle of lessons and that it would be inappropriate to simply let me out to chit chat.
    From this one girl, I got my supply of greeting cards. She gave me a greeting card for CNY, Hari Raya, Deepavali and Christmas.
    Oh, btw, 17th of November is my birthday. Wouldja mind just giving the LG phone to me for my birthday? Thanks very much, Kenny. I’m the girl who contacted you about that “small talk” you posted. Haha.

  72. LG WHITE CHOCOLATE FASHION PHONE GIVEAWAY CONTEST(HOW DESPERATE ARE YOU?)
    ——————————————–
    I remember when i was young, i saw a new girl who just arrived at my school. She was so pretty that almost 90% of the boys are secretly in love with her. To tell you the truth i wasn’t really very much interested with her because i wasn’t really into short hair girls. If you know Ryoko Hirosue then you can imagine that her face is somewhere like that. 🙂
    I am not sure if it’s fate or not but coincidently she was assigned to my class. All the boys in my class was so happy and i can even notice some of them floating in the air surrounded by happiness. Well going on, she was then introduced by our class teacher and her name was Athena. Spotting the seat beside me which is empty, it was almost certain she will be sitting beside me and she did!
    Then days passed by and we were good friends in school and after school, we went out together to have fun. After a long period with her, i realised that i had fallen in love with her. Seeing her makes my heart melt every now and then. I was scared of losing a friend if i really told her my feelings. So i continued to keep it to myself and we hang out as usual. Then one day, she suddenly tell me that her father will be bringing her whole family to migrate to England on Friday which was in 4 days time. I was so shocked and being so much in love with her, i was desperately wanting her to stay and tell her i love her but i didn’t have the courage to do so. But time is running out for me, i desperately want to do something to show her my feelings for her before she left. This is how i used the last few days before her departure.
    Day 1:
    After a sleepless night, I called her out and we had a long talk. I told her that i will give her the most memorable rememberance of this place so that she will never forget me and this place. She smiled and nodded happily. 🙂
    Day 2:
    It was already night, and i brought her out to the garden, she was blindfolded beforehand and i escorted her to the garden. As we reached, i took off her blindfold and she was speechless. Shocked in amazement, she stared at all the trees one by one that i decorated with party lights in the afternoon. The lights was lightened so beautifully that she was jumping around in happiness and thanked me for that. We had picnic in the garden and talk through the night.
    Day 3:
    Today was the second last day and the last night that i will see her. I prepared something very meaningful for her and which i think will win her heart and i hoped to tell her that i loved her at the end of the day. As usual i called her house phone but she wasn’t at home. To my amazement, i heard the doorbell and as i opened the door, she is standing there in a pretty dress. She looked so pretty and my jaw almost dropped. I told her to stay outside because i was not ready yet. After a few minutes, i told her to come in(my parents were out). The hosue was dark as i closed all the lights and i took her to the living room. Leaving her there, i went to open the lights. The lights shone through the room and the Christmas trees can be seen clearly at every corner of the house. Again she was surprised and was so happy. I was also delighted to see her warm smile which melted my heart. 🙂 Then i told her that “I know today is not Christmas but you are going away so soon and we never could celebrate Christmas together in time so i made this room to look like Christmass Day so you can have the most memorable Christmas Day.” She looked at me and gave me her warm smile. As i couldn’t resist anymore, i held her tightly and kissed her in the lips. I hope the time would just froze there and our lips would not seperate. I told her that i loved her and would never forget her even if she was going away and maybe would never come back here. She looked at me and said “I would never forget what you have done for me and i would never forget you for the rest of my lives. But i have to leave tomorrow and if fate is with us, i hope we will be together in the future and forever and i love you too.” She left home after that and never came back.
    Day 4: I stayed at home and watched the sky in hope of spotting her plane and hope that she sees me from above and wave one last time to me. I stared for one whole day and i knew it was the end.
    I would like to go on but i think i will stop here.
    Well i hope Mr. Kenny will make me the winner. That’s all. Thanks. 🙂
    I hope you can see my email, well i will just write it again here, [villiankknd@hotmail.com] 🙂

  73. a group of us had this huge crush on this relief teacher back in our jc days. not sure how it all started but the 3 of us kept find chances to visit him at his office that we even got to know his other 2 colleagues from the same batch. remembered once, we even invited him out after school to some karaoke and on another occassion, to the beach.
    when we heard he was leaving for a perm position in another school, instead of giving him a farewell card, we complied all out letters to him into a booklet!
    years later, one of us still kept in contact with him n we even visited his home n wife and kid one day!
    come to think of it, cant believe we did such stupid things during our youth 😛

  74. Dear Keith,
    your story is touching and i believe that in a million person, 1 person would do such a thing to a girl….good luck!
    Dear iwilleatyourpetfrogalive,
    your story is so funny, haha i love how you will celebrate his marriage by cooking her fish…=D

  75. I thought I had used this very ingenious idea to make him fall heads over me but it turned out to be disasterous. I had munched around a dozen of bubblegums and put them on the chair in a love shape.
    I got my girlfriends to make him sit on that particular chair. When he got up, he had a love shape on his buttocks. Needless to say, he knew who did it and poof! There goes my crush.

  76. I stalked my neighbour because I fancied him.
    ——
    Few years back, there was a lad who stayed in the condo below mine. I somehow developed some kind of attraction that causes butterflies in my tummy, loss of mental stability and at risk of doing something stupid, which is precisely what happened.
    I would go down and rollerblade until he came home and I would rush to go up the lift with him, in hopes of finding out a little bit more everyday. One day I’ll find out where he studies, the next his name and so on.
    This went on everyday.
    Sometimes I would even look out the window and whenever I saw his car, I get that “feeling” of excitement. I would time log his daily routine so that I know when he comes back, when he leaves, where he goes on certain days. His activities were all recorded down.
    I would go to his school chatrooms to find people who knew him.
    My friends would call me if they see him to let me know where he was, who he was with.
    I would talk to his parents just to find out more about him (he was a quiet guy).
    On my birthday, I planned a ‘stalkcapade’ just so my friends could see him.
    We planned a whole act out, from dialog, to location, to synchronizing our watches, just to make sure none of us missed the opportunity to see him. When the time came for us to ‘get in position’ that’s when our not-so-convinving-acting came into play.
    I was trying to get him to come to my birthday party, and he didn’t seem to know what to say. Even more, I had the whole scene tape recorded.
    My friends and I would ‘so happen’ to go up the lift together with him and I was a bit awkward that the lift was filled to the extent that there was no more space.
    He even said to his mother in Cantonese, “how come there’s so many people in lift?”
    Once he left and the doors closed, my friends howled in laughter and I felt so embarassed but excited at the same time.
    We went back to my place and kept playing the recorded tape over and over again.
    Without my knowledge, two of my friends went down to his apartment to try and get him to come up! I was so freaked out!!
    Ever since that event, I think the guy got really weirded out. He sort of ignored me, but I still kinda stalked him.
    This went on for almost two years until he left the country. How depressing. I never got to tell him what I really felt but I guess he got the not-so-subtle hint.
    And that’s how the story ends 🙁

  77. Desperation is in the eyes of the beholder.
    *names have been changed to protect what’s left of the dignity of the parties involved*
    ——-
    I think my cousin’s boyfriend Bernard deserves a place in this competition. He was crazy about my cousin Cindy. They had been dating a while and wanted to ask her to go steady. So he packed a picnic & asked her to go to the KL Lake Gardens late one afternoon.
    This was before the haze ah. So the weather was ok. The picnic went fine – nice food, not too many ants, and the place wasn’t too crowded.
    When they had nearly finished the food, he rose up to one knee on the blanket, surrounded by all the paper plates & food. He took her hand and said something like “Cindy, we’ve been going out a while now, and I really care for you. Will you be my steady?”
    Then he ripped open his shirt – wah liau, like Superman man. Cindy nearly died laughing! He had shaved his chest hair to form “I *heart* U”. I don’t know if he actually shaved or used the hair removal cream – to this day, he won’t tell me.
    Cindy told me about this siau stunt Bearnard pulled, but he refused to let me photograph it for evidence. But Cindy said that luckily, he had a nice bushy lot of chest hair, or else it could have been uglier than it already was.

  78. Took me several hours reading all the stories. Fantastic stuff. At least I feel less pathetic knowing that you guys are a lot worst than me. Haha. Thanks Kenny for such brilliant idea. And thanks to iwilleatyourpetfrogalive for being so weird cos you made me roll on the floor laughing like mad.

  79. There was this guy who went after my best friend. On her birthday, he waited under the hot sun outside her office with a bouquet of roses. When she came back from overseas, he was there at the air port smiling ear to ear with a HUGE teddy bear waiting for her. He even drove all the way from KL to her hometown in Penang and left her a little gift at her door step during CNY and left. After several harsh rejections from my friend, he did the scariest thing! He switched target to ME! I was like WHAT????
    There were several times when I drove home alone after a gathering with friends, I noticed a car tailing me for a few nights. It seriously freaked me out, so one day I decided to check the number plate. It was his car!! I nearly flipped! I confronted him and he explained proudly that he was worried about my safety and wanted to escort me home. Was I touched? NO! I was FREAKING out! On my birthday, he again waited at my office lobby with a bouquet of roses. When I came down to see him, he was hiding behind a pillar, smiling shyly and said “Nah, bring this upstairs so you can show off to all your colleagues!” Guess what I did? I donated the flowers to the florist downstairs. Recycling is always better than trashing it. On Christmas, he climbed up 5 flight of stairs (there’s no lift in my 5-floor apartment) and left a 5 feet fiber optic Christmas tree at my door step with a self-made card. He got my picture from the internet and printed on it. I remember walking through a shopping complex with a group of friends (including him…yea, we have mutual friends.) This was a year ago and it was during the Christmas season. I simply commented how beautiful the fiber optic Christmas tree looked. And there it was, a year later, at my door step. Aww..he remembered! (In a sarcastic tone) Was I touched? NOOOOO!!
    There was another incident, after the night church service, he waited for me at the entrance with the intention of walking me to my car. When I saw him there, I got really uneasy and waited for my other friends to come downstairs to avoid being alone with him. Even as I write about it now, it still gives me the creeps.
    I can’t remember how many times I had to reject him. I admit that the last few times, I was really rude because he didn’t seem to get the message. It was when I finally threatened to end our friendship that he stopped.
    To all the guys out there who are madly in love with your dream girls.. Here are some tips.
    1) Don’t show as if you’re overly desperate
    2) Don’t go after her best friend once you get rejected by her.
    3) Don’t use the same tactic with every girl especially if they know each other.
    4) When a girl finds you loathsome, leave her alone and move on with life! It’s not the end of the world.
    It only cheapens you.

  80. Desperate Addict! I AM ONE! I am so proud to proclaim that I am one simply because I AM ONE. Why? Hmm, well there are many many instances in my entire life that would make me seem like the winner of all Desperate Addicts, in fact I even thought of having my own show, The Desperate Addict! But of course, financial constraints (which is why I’m doing this because im in real need of a new phone and the LG white chocolate is well..free?)
    ANYWAY..
    Why im a desperate addict.
    You see, I was once very very in love with this one girl. Her name was Sandy, and even though she was not very pretty, she had very oriental features but I still liked her anyway. She was pretty, very pretty, in my own eyes of course. HOWEVER, in hers, she looked like a complete fool. She had small eyes, was on the heavy side and well yeah but of course love is blind! I saw perfection in her, the instant I saw her in class I fell head over heels for her and I loved her very very much, I started doing everything to attract her attention. Of course she noticed me, like how you’re noticing me now, and one day I just blurted out the words “I Like you!” and I swear her mouth gapped open like as though some invincible force had just stuffed three fists into her mouth. Ever since then, she stopped talking to me. Why? She thought I was playing a joke on her, BECAUSE unfortunately on the day I said that, it was April’s Fools Day and yeah, she thought I was playing a fool with her.
    But no, I really loved her you see. So I did everything I could. I bought her strawberries, I bought her flowers, I bought her EVERYTHING I swear everything and now im so broke I have to write this in to win a competition for an LG white chocolate phone because I simply don’t have enough money after spending it all on her and I can only smile while I look at my Nokia 3210. Nevermind that. Anyway I got her everything, every imaginable thing, every teddy bear, every flower in this world, every romantic inclined thing in this world to win her heart EVERYTHING EVERTYHING even after she had gone to cash converters to sell them off and I know because I was stalking her, my heart broke but I pieced it back and continued buying her things.
    One day, I had enough. I had enough of her ungratefulness, I was doing everything to win the heart of this girl and all she could do was keep mum and sell everything I gave her to cash converters, of course the flowers she donated to the Alam Flora man. I was so heartbroken, so sore, so angry so everything that I gave up and as a final present, probably an insult, I got her a box of weight loss pills because although she sold everything and gave flowers to the alarm flora man, She still ate the cookies and all I bought for her, so she grew fat fat. I gave her a box of NH DEtoxlim Plus pills, something to lose your spare tyres and she smiled when she received it. I was shocked, but took not much notice of it.
    A few months later, INSPIRED by this gift I gave her, sandy came back to me, now a thinner girl she was. It seems that, everything was a joke to her, until I gave her the slimming pills thing, only then did it cross her mind that I was genuine, when in fact I was trying to insult her, but nevermind I kept quiet about that and just accepted her with open arms. She jus wanted me to see hwo beautiful she was, even as a fat girl with small eyes. And when I gave her the pills, she knew that I saw just that. The fat girl with small eyes. And she was happy! Very happy. And now she is mine. I love you sandy.
    And the LG white chocolate is for her. Can give it to me please? 😡

  81. Is there a desperate addict in my life? hmm…yeah, plenty. I am one too. Well, like I said, I am a desperate addict, and I am desperate for that virgin, white LG chocolate.
    This happen during my diploma days. I was known back then at my Uni as “belangkas” cos i’m always with my then bf. And then we broke up ‘cos he just couldn’t resist pretty girls. And all of a sudden, I became a hot item, like there’s a big sign saying “I’m single and looking” on my head. I received many calls, from guys i knew to guys i don’t even a have a clue about.
    But i did had a crush on this one guy, H. My classmate, S is after this guy too and whaddaya know, she just broke up with her bf as well. I sensed competition. I ignored those guys who called me (some of them are hot) but i really didn’t give ’em a chance ‘cos i’m more into this guy.
    Lucky me, this H are buddies with my classmate and we always hang out after class and I can see that S is always trying to overtake me. She would ask my classmate to send her regards lah, say hi to him lah. And i did nothing, cos i never had the chance. I tried to talk to him but he would always shy away from me. I told myself that i’ve got a tough guy to deal here so i better put in extra effort.
    It so happen this one fateful day, my classmate and I and H hang out together at the canteen after class. I was planning on making my move that day. So, i waited for the right time until this ex-bf of mine came to me with a bouquet of rose and a chocolate cake asking me to accept him again, right in front of my friends, H, and other ppl around at the canteen. I can hear ppl clapping for me, i dunno WTF for, but i was really really embarassed.
    Then, suddenly i had an idea. Hehehe…guess this is the right time to strike. S was just at the next table looking over at H with admiration. I gave the flowers to H and the cake too. He was shocked and of course malu ‘cos it all happened so fast. S was shocked too. I told him, please, please take this. I like u. Then he said, what r u doing? Please don’t do this…Aiyo please lah. I suddenly felt like Bree from Desperate housewives, and said to him, almost screaming “Just take it H!!! Ur worth it!” Everyone was surprised.
    Now this thing doesn’t happen often, cos as far as i knew H, he has never smiled to me before. He forcefully let out a big smile, and to my disgust, he has rotten teeth. EEYYYUCCKKK!!! I grabbed the flowers and the cake from his hands, and i said, “it’s okay lah. Sorry ya H. I didn’t mean what i said just now. I was confused. sorry ya, sorry ya!” I said almost laughing. I got up, took the flowers and threw it in a nearby bin and went back home with 2 of my classmates, laughing away.
    The next week, after the incident, S tried to make a move on him, giving him X’mas card and he rejected it. However, H seem to be very interested to contact me after what i did. But now, he is the desperate addict.

  82. Once I had a crush with this girl, and let’s call her M. She rejects my first proposal, but still befriends me. The thing is, I don’t give up easily, and she does the rope-a-dope with me.
    So one day, she confessed of having a boyfriend in her U in Johor. I was devastated, but merely a week later, she cried on my shoulder when she clashed.
    When she returned to her U, I got a letter from her, saying that she’s in pain and all that. So I packed up, bought a bus ticket in Puduraya and go all the way to Johor. It was in a fasting month some more.
    The thing is, she don’t have a handphone at that time, and I just relied on her postal address. So I just braved myself going there, in hopes of seeing her somehow.
    I reached her college, but was unable to contact her. And to make things worse, it started to rain cats and dogs and their owners, and I’m stuck sitting on a bench, looking at students walking to their room, hoping that she would walk by.
    She didn’t.
    So I went back to the bus stand, bought a ticket back to KL. I was living in a college hostel that time, so since I reached KL at about midnight, going back to college was not an option. Even the Komuter had closed operation.
    So I called up my former computer tutor in my hostel, and he let me stay with him for a night.
    The next day, I returned to my college, only to be scolded by my lecturer for missing her class.
    We (maybe) have moved on since, but still keep in touch, and still try to woo each other like before.
    eh, Kenny, you want funny story or what ah?I forgot…but this one can la…

  83. yes, got desperate addict in my life! not just desperate, abit not right also =P
    there is a stalker in our school! ): her name is S. she likes so many guys, chinese malay indian angmoh whatever! you name it, she likes it! she goes around following them and stuff. STALKER!!!
    tak malu some more! she follow them everywhere! supposedly she even wait outside the toilet so she can see them and kacau. when i heard i was like OMG!!
    but the person i kesian most is one of my friends, A. she seems to really really really really (yeah you get it) like him. but she also likes the others a LOT also, so i am not sure who she likes the most. anyway!
    a while ago in school, she wrote a letter to A. i was reading a book when i saw A practically freaking out and holding a paper in his hands. so i of course asked him, hey what’s that?
    “IT’S A LETTER FROM HER!! THE STALKER!!! AAAAAHHHH”
    “serious? lemme see lemme see”
    so i took it and read it. ewwww weih!!! can feel your hair standing up when you read.
    “A, bila besar nanti kita kahwin boleh tak?”
    “awak boleh beli baju saya lepas tu saya boleh beli baju awak”
    “saya nak tinggal di rumah yang macam dalam Sembilu tu”
    “saya nak 3 orang anak lelaki”
    “kalau A nak anak perempuan boleh. kita ada 3 juga”
    those are just the tip of the iceberg. by the time i read even halfway through the letter i was literally cringing.
    we were making so much noise by then that there was a crowd of students around us. so then, there was a big hoo-ha coz of the stalker, and it seems that all the while she was hiding somewhere watching it happen. watching adam freaking out and all of us laughing like mad.
    the other day two of our teachers scolded her. cos they were informed that she was stalking people. but she LAUGHED all the while that she was being scolded. OMG! then one teacher did the ‘crazy’ sign, like the one where you circle your finger at the area of your temple. and the girl was still laughing her head off.
    she’s already been sent to another school. lucky!!

  84. “Is there a desperate addict in your life?”…i’ve not seen one but i know they will do anything for u…including this (just to impress u)
    – bake u bout 100 cakes, if u r a cake lover
    – decorate the whole room with balloons, if u are a balloon lover
    – buy u 999,999,999 flowers, if u r a flower lover
    and last but not least
    – buy you all sorts of chocolates, if u are a chocolate lover and that includes the LG chocolate phone but if u cant afford the phone….
    win u a chocolate LG phone for the one u love (which is wat i’m doing now)in kenny sia’s website…!!!…muahahahah

  85. Funny Kenny.
    I have no funny story to share but this really happen to me.
    I happened to be with this girl for 2 whole years but my heart was broken when she left for Melbourne and met someone new there. We were very much in love in the past when we were still in Malaysia and it was shocking even to my family whom was being very encouraging about our relationship. One thing Kenny, I am a girl too. It was a surprise that my family accepted us as we come from a typical chinese family. Many of our friends were happy for us but there were obstacles to face too from many sides.
    However, she got lonely when she was in Melbourne and I couldn’t be there for her as I had my studies to tend to in Malaysia. So, she called it quits and moved on with another person.
    However, it was hard for me to accept the cruel fact. Throughout the post breakup, I got myself addicted to alcohol and kept thinking of ways to hurt myself. I cut myself on the wrists at times without realising as I was too numb to feel anything. I got myself admitted in the hospital one time due to excessive alcohol in my bloodstreams. So many times I walked out in the streets, only to be honked by cars because I didn’t know I was walking out from the pathway.
    It has been a year since she last broke up with me. But every second, my heart is still pining for her. I know I am still silly to hold on the past yet I think I am addicted to her.
    I kept sending emails, kept sending smses from this country, asking my friends to check on her in Melbourne..Asked about her condition and the current boyfriend.. I love her very much and because of that, I couldn’t move on.
    I happened to be someone who loves gadgets, and when I saw this entry of yours, my heart melted a little. It has been a long time since I last pamper myself. Friends have told me to let go and treat myself better but then again,I couldn’t..till I saw the LG white phone.
    I know the hilarious entry happens to win the contest, but kenny, I hope you would able to consider this story of mine.
    I know it’s nothing great, maybe many of you has encountered this before..but I really do still love you, Evelyn.
    Thanks kenny..

  86. It was during lunch break back in form 3 when my friend and I were chattin happily with the juiciest gossips we could think of.
    However, our conversation were halted by a guy from another class holding a note on his hand.. saying he had something to pass to my friend beside me.
    I curiously looked into what’s the note letter about when i saw my friend’s face blushed red.
    It stated,
    Dearest
    SEXY (friend’s name)..
    It all started when i first saw you at the bus stop..You were caught in the rain, looking lost but incredibly sexy…I could not help but fall deeply for you.
    I know, it’s Love at First sight…n bla bla bla ( it was in chinese therfore, making it more hilarious with the idioms and phrases he was using) bla bla bla..
    and on the last few lines in the final paragraph..
    he wrote
    P.s Look outside, I plead for your love
    LOVES,
    XXXXX
    Then,
    I looked out and could not help laughing my head off at the scene.
    (It was raining at the time, heavy downpour)
    There’s this guy drenched from head to toe..
    Singing ‘meteor garden’ theme song.
    Openly proclaiming his “LOVE” to my friend
    That instance, i wondered.. is he impersonating Jerry Yan from meteor Garden? What a unique way to declare his affection to my friend.
    Anyway, that incident sure made my friend the most popular girl in our level.
    However, that did not help the guy to win my friend’s heart.
    She prefer other guys than ‘jerry yan’ hehe
    O yea, i find the starting of the letter hilarious as well.
    SEXY XXXX
    imagine..
    Dear SEXY KENNY (or) SEXY Tze F00 =)
    Bla bla bla…

  87. hahaha,this one use sympathy tactics one, who believes in you, hahahahx, lidat can, then i oso wanna try, i m boy, like a boy, boy left for Mars and found another boy, then i very sad, i go jump river, siao arrr, oh, n oso, i love u…….ah kau

  88. I had this guy friend in college, calls him K. Heard from a common friend of his from sec school, that he used to be so in love with this gal, which doesn’t give any attention to him. As the girl is VERY fair and has always flaunted about her fairness, K shaved his hairy legs, wore a shorts fo PE, and loudly declared to the girl “see, I am very fair also”, just to get her attention.
    Of course, needless to say, the girl thinks there’s something wrong with K, and stayed even further away from him…. hahaha…. 😀

  89. Everyone seem to have sweet and funny love stories to tell. Why am I so unconventional?
    Perhaps I’m the more kiasu type, who would not go all out of my way to show that I love him. I will only stand by closely, lending him a crying shoulder, listening ears, and many petitions to God for his health, career, and happiness.
    I dare not impose or demand for anything much, for fear that he might push me away. But whenever he does, and when things seem to be at breaking point, I would wake up in the middle of the night, bathing in cold sweat and fervent prayer. I have even vomitted because of him and wish surgeries would end all the pain. Worse than losing my life, because I have placed him above myself.
    Love is different to everyone, but when I love a person, I place him above all else. Above my life, my health, my happiness, my writings…
    Feminist movements say we should not lose identity to a man. But that is a personal choice, really. How much do we love a person, and how much are we willing to give?

  90. My story started in form 3. I was a prefect, in charge of a form 1 class. I had the absolute hots for this guy K in that form 1 class. When my friends found out they kept calling me a ‘paedophile’ in a joking sort of way. I liked him so much that I used to sneak into the ‘Handphone Collection Room’ to caress his little light blue Sagem mobile while my prefect friends who were in charge of the handphones looked out for teachers just in case!
    Then one day one of my friends got his email for me. I blissfully happy that day, and added him on msn right away when I got home. It didnt’t occur to me that it was incredibly sad for me to chase after a FORM 1 BOY while i’m in FORM 3 and a PREFECT. (now i look back and think “how mortifying”)
    So we were talking on msn and he was really sweet to me and stuff, so I told my friend about it and she was like “Gimme his email! I’ll help you get him!” Without giving a second thought, I offered it to her, crossing my fingers.
    Before she went offline, she sent me the chatlog between her and K. (her nickname at that time was “BubBleBatH…”)
    After reading it I almost died. She pretended to be a really hot Form 5 guy who had fallen madly in love with me and found out I liked K. So she said stuff like “You better take care of her, or I’ll beat you up” and other pretentiously macho stuff. So K obviously found out I liked him, and he also realised that “BubBleBatH…” was my friend because the nickname was OBVIOUSLY a girly one!!
    I was so mortified I never looked him in the eye ever again after that!

  91. This is a true story.
    A friend of mine coupled with this guy who is a major desperate addict.
    They used to be inseparable at school back when we were form 5 and would argue over the silliest matter even if it’s just my friend talking to another guy.
    Now that they’re in college, they’re separated by time and distance. And the guy, actually sent spies to “watch over” my friend. So she’ll have like cars following her around wherever she went.
    They argued a lot to a point where they broke up… and when they tried to make up again he came up with the silliest most stupidest thing i’ve ever heard. He made a “SURAT PERJANJIAN” on which he states rules on which she can or can’t do if she were to be with him again.
    There were things like she can’t stay in the college unless she has classes, she can’t go out with boys, she can’t go out without his permission and bla bla. She can’t even go out with us girls without his permission!!
    And the icing on the cake,…
    he even had a section at the end where my friend was supposed to sign if she agreed.
    Thank god she didn’t.

  92. Well, it just happened to me last month.
    There is a guy named A whom I’m very close with and had become my bf before. Our relationship was on & off meaning; dated for few months and breakoff for few months later and so on. We had unsteady relationship for 2 years. Being with him was so sweet and comfortable. However, I was in a difficult situation whether should I date or go out with other guys when we were not a couple.
    We broke off early this year, and we went separate ways. We still keep in contact each other through phone calls and meet each other like close friends. He dated with another girl and I was fine with it. Just last month, somehow A got to know that I’m going out with another guy, B. A got so jealous and called me many times when I was watching movie with B at night. I was so embarrassed with B when my conversation with B had to be interupted many times whenever I had to answered A calls.
    After movie with B, B sent me home. A still called me at midnight and he said “I can’t live without you. I realised that I really love you alot. Please come back to me.” I was so touched and I just asked him that why are our relationship was unsteady for 2 years? The next morning, he came to my house with a bouquet of roses and kneel in front of me “Will you marry me?” He apologised for being a jerk for letting me away because he wasn’t confident with our relationship and he was afraid that my family will not accept him for being poor guy. In fact, I still love him and I accepted his proposal. I just explained to him not to worry too much because my heart is still with him. I guess both of us are fated to be together even though our initial relationship was unsteady.

  93. “Do you know someone who did something outrageous, bizarre, stalkish or even “borderline criminal” to try to impress you? Who knows, maybe you are a desperate addict yourself? Tell us all!”
    Oh boy. I hope you will all be entertained.
    Setting the scene:
    When: One night, sometime in 2004
    Where: An apartment somewhere, Gold Coast, Australia
    The people: 2 friends (They shall be referred to as A and B respectively), one girl with plenty of issues (I will name her ‘X’) and myself (unfortunately)
    Introduction:
    A, B and myself are friends.
    B, is a friend of X
    X was recently dumped and was very depressed.
    B decides to have a small get-together to get X out of the house.
    And the story goes:
    It’s about 8pm. A and me bring out some chips and drinks.
    For some reason, A decides to also bring out her unfinished bottle of JD.
    “Why you bring that out?” I queried.
    “Just drink coke enough la.” I added.
    “Nevermind, X is depressed right? I much rather she get drunk and puke, then see her cry and sob all night about her ex la.”
    Point taken.
    B arrives with X and we are all seated in the living room and it’s nice. It’s all good. Everyone is talking and no one is crying. Yet.
    We are talking about the upcoming “University Ball” and suddenly X goes quiet. You know, that kind of quiet.
    Slowly she curls up on the sofa and has her face in her hands. Uh-oh.
    A, B and me are looking at each other.
    X starts to sniff and then finally it hits. She’s crying.
    Being her friend, B starts to comfort her with the works.
    “What’s wrong?” “Why are you crying?” “Don’t cry” etc etc.
    And suddenly in the midst of her crying she says.
    “We were suppose to go to the ball together.” More crying ensues.
    “I want to call him!!!” Sob sob sob
    “B Help me call him! Tell him I want to see him.” Sob sob sob
    This goes on for about another half an hour so I will skip on.
    Eventually, X cried herself to sleep much to our relief. But we continued to talk and stuff.
    A, decides she needs a drink and so she does. I didn’t have any cause I had to drive 😛
    So A and B are having JD and coke and we are talking somemore when suddenly, X wakes up and sits up. She doesn’t say anything.
    Her eye catches the bottle of JD and she reaches for it. In a matter of seconds, she downs what must have been at least 5 – 6 shots. Mumbles some gibberish and sorta passes out.
    Ah. Good. That oughta knock her out for a while.
    “Eh! What are you doing???” B suddenly screams.
    A and me look at B.
    “She can’t drink!” she clarifies.
    “She can’t take alcohol one!”
    Are you shitting me?? We scramble to the floor.
    So we are all around her trying to get her up and find out if she’s okay. It’s panic mode now. A and B are high from the drinks and I am left to figure out what on earth to do. I am no paramedic dammit.
    In a drunken daze and after plenty of “Wake up!” “Are you okay?” X finally comes to and she starts to cry again. But this time she’s choking and gasping for air.
    Her sobs interrupted by what can only be described as “asthma like breathing”.
    WTF? I think to myself. Why so crazy one!!
    We figured that it was the crying that was making her choke so we again try to calm her down. But it only got worse!
    Here she is sprawled out on the floor crying with one hand on her throat and the other on her chest.
    “I..can’t…breathe..” she mumbles.
    KNN. The thoughts of the Police storming the apartment and arresting all of us run through my head.
    “What are we going to do??” A asks. I had no answer. Things weren’t looking good.
    B then informed me that X had a history of asthma and panic attacks (whatever the hell that means) and was admitted to hospital on a number of occasions. And apparently she can’t drink cause she gets breathing difficulties. WTF right? Anyhoos.
    To that I said.
    “And you choose now to tell me that??”
    “Why didn’t you tell us earlier?? A brought out the JD cause we thought better let her get drunk then she won’t get depressed!”
    I would actually like to say that I was very in control of the situation but I wasn’t, really. The last thing I expected that night was a trip in an ambulance.
    B rummaged through X’s bag and finds nothing. No medication no inhaler. Great.
    I take out my handphone and I am flipping it open and shut.
    “I am calling for help.” I say.
    A and B nod in unison. And just as I am keying in the number, X grabs my wrist.
    “Don’t…don’t..call.. them.” She says.
    “It’s going to be okay. They are going to come and help.” I answer.
    “No….need…don’t call.” And then she starts to pound her chest with both hands.
    And I am talking about serious pounding y’all. Like “Thud! Thud!”
    We were stunned.
    “This…*Thud* helps *Thud* me *Thud*.”
    “This..is..*Thud* the hospital *thud* taught …me”
    So she’s doing it for a bit, and we figured, at least she can breathe right? What ever works. Does it end there? No….
    She’s still crying and choking. But I am beginning to think that she’s faking it but in a situation like that who’s to say.
    She grabs my wrist again and points to the mid-section of her ribs.
    “Help me….hit…here…PLEASE!.”
    Are you kidding me? Here I am worried if she’s going to die and now she wants me to hit her?
    I look at A and B and the urge me to do it. Easy for them to say.
    “Please just do it, please I don’t want anything to happen.” A is panicky now and she starts to well up.
    *Sigh.*
    Soon I find myself on my knees next to X. I had my left hand on the point she indicated to cushion the thump I was going to deliver with my right. And so I did. But after a few thumps, X mumbles;
    “Harder..hit harder..”
    This girl is whacked.
    I don’t even bother to ask A and B. And you know, I don’t think I have ever hit a girl or a guy for that matter, that hard, repeatedly in my life.
    And guess what? It worked. She stopped crying and she was breathing. First time I heard beatings were so beneficial.
    But now there was another problem. We had to get her back on the sofa so that she could sleep. Being the guy, A and B suggested that I lift her up. My manhood was now at stake.
    Problem is, X is about 5’1 but in kinder words, she wasn’t slim.
    So okay-lo. I figured the best way to do it was scoop one arm under her neck and one arm under her legs. And it was mother-friggin hard wei. Imagine, lifting something pretty heavy from that position. It’s like the weightlifting except I am no weight lifter.
    In brief. On the first attempt I lifted her up a few inches and lost my balance. On the second attempt i managed to life her but because of the weight and my strength, we collapsed backwards onto one of the single seater sofas. On the 3rd attempt and with the help of A and B, we managed to ‘stumble’ her onto the sofa.
    Then she slept somemore and then B brought her back to her place.
    The ending:
    It doesn’t sound like much right? But believe me, it’s one of those things where you had to be there. Needless to say, I never did meet X again.
    That said, I later discovered that she forced B to tell her ex about that night and how she had a panic attack and nearly died because of him etc etc. The final piece of the puzzle fitted.
    I don’t think the ex bought it though cause they didn’t get back together.
    B actually told me that X persisted and started to stalk X. Drive to his house at night to see what was going on, use the public phone to call his house to find out if he was home etc. Your typical Hollywood stalker. But I wasn’t there to see it.
    At the end of the day, I was never sure whether she was faking it or not. But I think it’s outrageous to fake something like that and have people worry about you.
    But if it was real, then very bizarre. What on earth is a panic attack anyway?
    I do have another story involving a suicide. But that’s too personal and a story not for me to tell.
    So that’s my story. Hope it was worth the time reading it. Apologize for the typo’s too.
    *Kenny: Sorry I took up so much space.

  94. I saw this on newspaper, and it happens in KL few months back, I can’t remember the exact date. Anyway, there is this guy who is getting married soon, and he did something really sweet just to give his future wife a really big surprise. He spends a huge sum or money, expressing his love to his future wife by posting their wedding pictures with “I Love you (the girl name) forever, from (that guy name)” on the billboards. It is not just on one billboard, I think there is at least a dozen of it with their pictures on it. All the billboards are located at the road/highway which the girl normally travels from house-office-house. The girl was so shock and surprised to see her pictures on those billboards when she was travelling home that day. At first, she thought it’s just another new advertisement by looking it from far, but upon looking it closely, her jaw dropped and a few seconds of silence, when she saw their wedding pictures and their names on it. Since their wedding pictures was posted on those billboards, it has been a talk of the town.

  95. We were best friends. we talked bout anything, the past, the present and even the future. we didn’t keep any secret from each other.
    one day, current bf’s ex, called me up. scolded me and say so many bad things bout me and bubble msg me for bout two months. at the same time, this best friend of mine was listening to me and gave advises..
    little did i know, cos he likes me so much that he pakat with my bf’s ex, and try to make me sick of my bf. he wanted me to go to look for him a crying shoulder. i was totally ignorant bout this.
    this best fren of mine went out with me to so many places, beer sessions most of the time. and there was once he hold my hand tightly and pretended that he was drunk.
    sigh.. months later, i got to know the real story from a good fren of ours. he told me everything. this best fren of mine, lied and had done so many things behind me.
    feeling sad for months, we did not contact each other till now.
    guy and girl = cannot be best fren???
    just wondering.

  96. Hi Kenny,
    My ‘desperate stalker’ story began on the virtual social network evil called Friendster. The history of it is that this guy sent me a message on Friendster, apparently after reading my profile. It was pretty calm and cheerful, we attended the same university, he wanted to make friends with someone in the same faculty. All good, so I sent a short reply and the correpondence began. After a couple harmless “hello how are you” type messages, he asked for my MSN Messenger address, and because he’d given me a very harmless impression that far, I gave it to him.
    If I’d known what kind of strangeness would ensue, I’d have thought twice. He painted himself as a cultured know-it-all son-of-a-celebrity (he told me his father was a high-flying trance DJ in one of his Friendster messages) philosophical writer and student. In the space of 20 minutes of reading text in a chat window, he concluded that he could have a ‘perfect interpersonal understanding’ with me and assumed that I was ‘a girl with a nice figure who dresses in a chaste manner and praises the great lord and lives a life away from temptation lol’.
    I can’t quite explain how strange it was. Check your email and open the chatlog I’ve sent in Internet Explorer – it’s more entertaining to read his ramblings for yourself.
    After that chat session, I blocked him off my messenger and Friendster, hoping to never hear of him again. The next week, a friend of mine (who incidentally has almost the same name as I do) told me that she had a virtual stalker…
    It was the same guy. And she didn’t block him off MSN – he ended up actually ‘coincidentally’ meeting her, writing her passionate love letters (and apparently a ‘relationship contract’), and buying her massive bouquets of roses.
    She got rid of him too.

  97. Back in year 2002, I was fresh out of high school and was a 1st year college student. I had a crush on a girl, X. Her birthday falls on Aug 23 and mine is Aug 29. I thought about throwing a birthday dinner to celebrate her and also my birthday. I invited about 10 other ppl and her to a Japanese restaurant like 12 days before her birthday. It’s not about the dinner but something else.
    Early morning on Aug 11, about 3am, the day the dinner’s gonna be held. I cycled to a fly-over(for cars but not pedestrians) nearby my house. The reason is to spray on the wall of the fly-over confessing to her and the reason I didn’t drive is to prevent someone from reporting my car plate number to the police when they see what I was doing. It’s actually a crime to do this I supposed, but I thought it was very special and extreme. It’s just a few simple words but took me more than an hour to do it because I constantly ran away from that area when hearing engine sound that is coming towards me. I didn’t want to let people see what I was doing and I might get caught too.
    It’s just a few simple words in pink spray. It writes something like this
    X, I like U
    my initials 11/8/02
    I brought her to pick a Swatch watch herself before the dinner. After dinner, I drove her to that fly-over I sprayed on and asked her to look to the right while I went to the boot to get the roses I prepared earlier.
    Even though it has been more than 4 years now but the spray is still there. Although it has faded a bit but it’s still visible.
    If you are staying in Penang island and pass by the state mosque from Greenlane heading towards Air Itam, make sure you look to the right when you are about to come across the state mosque. The spray is on the turtle-shell-a-like fly-over wall just opposite the YMCA that’s beside the state mosque.
    Wahahaha…..don’t report me to the cops la har…plssssssssssss

  98. yes, there is a desperate addict in my life..
    well, pretty easy.. i met this girl in my english tuition which i found really attractive.. i didn’t know who she was.. so i got really desperate to know her.. it so happened that one of my friends who sent me a forwarded emails also sent that email to that girl i like as well! so i asked him for her email address and stuff.. so on that day, after tuition, i added her on msn.. SHE CAME ONLINE! and we started talking and stuff.. so things were going very well..
    then months passed and we became closer lah! she was very famous among the guys in our school year.. so i thought i wouldn’t stand a chance because i was too slow..
    but anyways, she would still talk to me often and stuff.. now, we’re together…
    i was really desperate for this girl and i’ve seeked loads of help from her friends for advice.. at that time, many people were going after her but in the end, she chose me….
    if i really get to win this phone, kenny, i’m going to give it to her because i love her and she’s my addict in life!

  99. i have this feeling that XX will get that pink phone…any1 thinks i’m right? Not gonna try for the comtest since i’m from far off Vancouver, Canada…

  100. my gf insists that i post something for the phone.. hehe.. it’s embarassing but here goes:
    One day in school, during PE, a ball rolled up to me and along with it one of my classmates which i’ve never really noticed came running to me. She bent over and lo and behold, i caught a glimspe of the first pair of love pillows i’ve ever seen!! They were huge, round and I was mesmerised…
    I was fourteen and in secondary 2. Needless to say, being young, hot-blooded and eager, the first thing i did when i got home was wank… And wank and wank and wank…
    As a result of all the wanking, besides having blardy aching balls, I decided that this was the girl for me. After months of stalking, perving, courage building, and wanking, I decided to tell her that I liked her.
    Anyways, I walked up to her one fine day after school to tell her what I thought would make a girl swoon but I just could not take my eyes away from her boobs. When I finally tore my eyes away from what I thought was God’s greatest creations, I looked up and saw that she was also looking down at my crotch. I had the greatest erection ever!! We had to wear shorts then (for lower secondary, I was schooling in Singapore then..) and as I was growing pretty fast, as a whole and not just my crotch, the damn shorts obviously had to be too tight for me.
    She reddened and ran. I stood there, looked downwards, looked around and ran too. Luckily, we are great friends now. Hehe..

  101. I’m only 14 and I met a guy a year older than me.
    I never even knew he existed actually considering we’re in different school sessions.
    One day I met him and he showed interest in me but I only considered him as a mutual friend. Next thing I know, he was getting my contact number, e-mail and address from my friends.
    He sent me tons of messages and called me like .. more than 20 times in one night.
    And he kept sending me messages saying .. ‘I LOVE YOU SO MUCH! YOU ARE MY ONE AND ONLY! ALLOW ME TO BE THE ONE IN YOUR LIFE FOREVER!’
    It was pretty hilarious and scary at the same time. Well I rejected him uncountable times and he still kept on trying. Then one day he send a group of students who I would say were gangsters after me.
    They threatened me saying, “How can you reject him? Think you’re that great!? b***h! You better accept him!”
    You could say that it put me off even more. Later when I confronted him, he begged for forgiveness but I more or less spat loads of cruel remarks in his face. Till today, he’s still trying to get me. Still sending those disgusting messages and even making up stories about a girl to try and make me jealous. Needless to say, it doesn’t affect me at all.
    Oh wow ! This is a pretty long comment isn’t it? =) Hahaha. If I do win the LG phone I am so gonna flaunt it and show off to my older bro! =D
    Pick me? =)

  102. so many lui bin!!!….no is “expensive hp” bin!!!aiyoh jez hand in ur story,no need beg for it lar…kenny will choose wan….u beg only make ppl think u r so fake lar!!

  103. I have always been a stephen chow fan. 2 days ago, I dreamnt about him acting in a movie (a movie I have neither seen b4 nor exist) and it was so funny, I remembered I laughed in my dream and I did so hard I woke up from my sleep giggling. But I realised that the movie in my dream had just reached the climax and I really wanna finish watching it, so I tried to sleep back and see whether I can continue the dream. But lolz, it didn’t happen~~
    P/S:The movie is about stephen chow trying to save the emperor from the betrayal from his ministers.I only get to dream until stephen chow meet the emperor and crap until half way, any directors here wannna make my dream to a movie?

  104. I can’t believe you’re making us do this for your own amusement, Kenny Sia!!!!! You evil..er…I mean, sweet, kind, leng chai blogger extrordinaire, haha. Anyway, here goes:
    There is this guy – let’s refer to him as A – in my college. I first noticed him because my friends thought he was really hot and kept talking about him. But I didn’t really give it much thought until we were introduced by mutual friends. He had me at “So where do you live?”
    I KNEW I had to get to know him better. So I schemed to get myself elected as the treasurer of my class trip – and succeeded. I had to meet him to discuss details as he was unofficially picked by me to represent the other class.
    Once, when he came to ask me about some details, our eyes met and I felt that electric-shock-thingy that you usually see in cartoons. After that, he started calling me to talk and we eventually went out thrice. Then he suddenly stopped calling.
    I was trying to figure out what happened when I saw him walking to the toilet in college one day. The toilet is near my locker so I went to take things out from my locker while waiting for him to come out, desperate to see if he would talk to me.
    When he came out, he stopped to say, “New hairstyle? Nice.” I quickly gathered my things so I could talk to him while walking to class. And guess what? I LEFT MY SONY ERICSSON K700i PHONE IN AN UNLOCKED LOCKER!!!
    When I fell out of my “love”-induced stupor, I went back to get it but someone had already stolen it and did not plan to return it. I cried for for 2 whole days after that, even on the class trip I had to plan because I was on the committee.
    Needless to say, I have no more feelings for A. He later told me there was this girl who got his number, started calling him, bought him a new line and paid for his lunch and movie. That’s why he stopped calling me. I wasn’t desperate enough for him. If only he knew!!!

  105. I am not sure whether my story is crazy enough but I am very sure that I must be crazy when i did it.
    A few months ago, I know a guy thru friendster. I was trying to search for my long lost ex bf in friendster actually. I typed his name, and they happened to have the same name. He is in Australia and I am in Singapore.
    From the first smiley face in friendster, msn chats, international sms-es and webcam kisses, we began to tell how much we miss each other every single day.
    I was having exam in April and May time, and all my papers were screwed because of all these.
    In order to cross the sea to see him in real, I slogged everyday, doing two part time jobs, just to earn enough money to buy an air ticket to Australia. Day and night, i never stop working and working, for almost two full months.
    My friends asked why am i working so hard, i got no ans for them. The one in Aus asked where did i go everyday, i said i went out to have fun.
    In fact, i worked as much as i can.
    My parent dont want to support me,so ive gotta rely on myself.
    So after two months of intensive period, I bought my first ticket to australia.
    The first real hug was unexpressible. We spent a month together in australia, which was the happiest moment in my life. It was winter, so it was particularly cold. There wasnt snow, but tears flowing down my cheek every nights in australia.
    We met, we fell in love, we separated again.
    If I were given another chance, I would asked him whether he loves me not?
    I didnt.
    Coz i know its pointless.
    I came back to singapore after a month with him.
    We stil chat in msn and he was still in my friendster.
    But i know everything is not gonna to be the same anymore.
    But well, thats life I think.
    I’d trade everything i have here,once again, jst for another chance to fall in his arms again.
    This is a true story in case u think its too dramatic.
    Somehow i m scared he will read this.

  106. Ok here goes, this story is about me and my first girlfriend and still my current girl.
    I used to be dumb guy who doesn’t deserves anyone because of my attitude. Lots of people dislikes me yet I still gv them my own piece of mind by ignoring.
    Until the day she came into my life, I change because of her. She is the 1st girl who dares to come to me and tell me her own piece of mind about me.
    She thinks I am a loser, who deserves no one because of my attitude. She hurts me deeper than anyone could.
    I could never imagine a girl will tell me these but she did. I hated her, but in the same time she was in my mind always since then.
    Things started to change where I begin to realise my behaviour and in the end I realise I was really a real b*stard .
    I realise I love her and I decided to confess to her like this:
    I went to her school (we are both schooling) asks for her from the administration pretending to be her brother. When she arrives, she was surprised and I told her… I love you sister, *kissed* her in front of the administrators and in return I got 1 tight slap …
    I left with everyone jaws on the floor thinking I have lost the battle but in the end of the day, she came to me and told me I love you but don’t be stupid and gt slap by me again…
    Today I type this again is because she wanted the phone so much, therefore she threatened to slap me if I fail to win the phone … kenny if you want to witness a tight slap from my girl to me *live* just gimme the phone and I will post the action to you ^^ arigato gozaimasu!!!

  107. This is the story of the most desperate addict I know, who is trying hard to hold on to the love of her life.
    I’m sort of a Dear Thelma person and this person, who ironically replaced me at my previous job, is constantly telling me about her love-life and god help me if its not true, but I’ll leave that to you to decide. A met B (for B@$!@^&) through mutual friends and although B was already engaged at the time, the chemistry was amazing. So they started dating, and B told her in no uncertain terms that he would not end his engagement, because although his heart belonged to A, C, his fiancée had been there for him through the thick and thin.
    I don’t know what’s so amazing about B but he must either be earning the big buckaroos or is damn good in bed, because according to A, C found out about the relationship and while she ranted and raved for a bit, she eventually agreed to a time-sharing arrangement with A! They both stayed with B on specific days of the week and A would cook for B, even clean the apartment and do all the laundry (including A’s). She even would help B buy presents for C – I kid you not! Eventually of course, B married C and C moved in with him, much to A’s dismay. But the desperation continues – they still have the time-sharing agreement except B now spends the days with A at her apartment instead of his, even hosting parties together!
    I’ve tried to gently indicate that ‘making do’ isn’t good enough and there are plenty of nice hairy-chested and legged men 😉 out there, but perhaps I should give her a call and tell her what I honestly feel…

  108. Keith. Don’t really believe your story. The way you wrote it sounds really fake. Hah. But if it’s true, whatever, sorry.
    Wombok: Panic attacks are a psychological problem when a person suddenly feels seriously terrified for no reason, and their heart starts beating really fast and they have trouble breathing. Liked your story. 🙂
    Daniel: Heh. “I love Sasuke!!” XD

  109. weih, kenny ah. i want the phone but i have no story to tell. should i start being a desperate addict just for the phone?

  110. Oh.
    My story is kinda lame, but I will tell it anyway, because it might make you laugh.
    I am a desperate addict for… LiYang from K-One.
    Yeah yeah I know, he’s the one who looks like a 14 year old girl when he is really 28. But I dunno, there is something about him that I find jsut so adraoble about him.
    What makes me a desperate addict?
    I don’t speak Mandarin, just learned a little bit in Saturday School, but I went and taught myself Chinese just so I can watch all the series he is in.
    I watched got all his series and all the K-One CDs (even if they only have ONE song on the stupid cd) sent to my house cos I ordered it off yesasia (about $350AUD so far), but damn thing didn’t work in my DVD player. So I went and got myself a new DVD player ($450AUD). O.o
    I didn’t like that my TV was too small to see his pretty face..so I went a bought a new TV ($950AUD).
    I order in heaps of magazines, and painstakingly translate all the stupid articles just so I could read them about him. (Dunno how much all the mags cost… maybe $250 AUD so far?)
    I go to sing kareoke all the time, and I generally sing Zui Mei De Yi Ke, cos it’s the song that has him in it the most. I sing it about 4 or 5 times in a row.
    I had to buy a new laptop ($2500AUD) cos I wanted broadband ($60AUD a month!!), so I could watch clips of him on youtube .
    And on the day I got youtube, I stayed up all night watching his clips over and over and didn’t sleep, so didn’t go to work that day, and didn’t get paid. ($190AUD)
    So as you can see Kenny, I have wasted too much money on a Taiwanese boyband member who doesn’t know I’m alove, and I need a new phone. 🙁
    Is over $5000 enough to be called an addict?
    PS. Does it make it worse than I’m 22 with a fulltime job, and now should be a lot smarter than this?
    PPS. I have a Malaysian mailing address even though I’m Aussie. 🙂

  111. I don’t think there’s a desperate addict in my life but there’s definitely a desperate addict in my ex-bf’s life!!!
    He would leave me small gifts at my doorsteps every now and then eventhough i’ve told him uncountable times that there would be nothing else between us ever since we’ve broken up. I’ve been avoiding him in order not to create any false hope. The worst part would be my housemate bringing in the gift each time (because she’s the one who goes off to work in the morning first) saying, “Ewee, imagine he was standing at the front door yesterday night. That’s spooky.” Tell me, is he a potential stalker?
    p/s: if i win this phone, i’ll probably thank him ;p

  112. I guess I am lazy to read all the stories above, but i can 100% confirm that’s my real story which happened this year. yeah, starting this year.
    Like many other school students, we are excited with our first day of school, wondering whether we will meet any new person or friends la. Life in form 4 after being streamed to other different streams is really different compared to form 3. Many of my friends were not with me now and I met a few new character.
    One of the person makes me write this story now. He’s like any ordinary boy that i knew but he’s definately as quiet as a stone and he’s too shy to talk to almost everyone. Of course, everyone felt really weird seeing new characters in the class and everyone was wondering whose’s that and finally, we knew who is he. and he was actually related with some XXXXXX in the school.
    His attitude makes everyone feel interested with him. I even heard that there’s people from other classes had crush on him. But till that time, I couldn’t find anything interesting bout him. I heard from my friends that he was asking my name. well, I just think, maybe he would want to know more bout his new friends. The time of the year had come. 14/2. and surprisingly, i received a flower without knowing who send that flower and he was one of the person which my friend guessed he sent the flower.
    I couldn’t express whether i had feelings on him or not, but we went to the same tuition centre and from there, we became friends. unlike earlier of the year, we were like strangers to each other. we teased each other. but before that, whenever i want to pass anything, i would be really shy to pass it directly to him and when i saw him reading that thing, my face became really blushed and my hand became really cold. It was as if too much blood flowing to my brain.
    Rumours says that he likes me too. but i seriosuly don’t think so, though i had a tiny feelings to him. feeling weird if i couldn’t see him. and i was really afraid that people was saying i am too desprate to see him, so i chose the same tuition centre with him. Some realised i am getting close to him and even teased both of us. but i take this normally. But I really could say we had a few similarity. and sometimes when i felt boring, i would put our both names in the love calculator and it can reach above 96%. close to 100% and of course i don’t trust all these too much.
    I don’t wish for more but i hoped we could still be friends. Whether i got his heart or not, it’s still too young to say anything.

  113. I got a story i dnt think it is very interesting but i want the phone. I will show you how desperate i am for the phone. Ha ha.
    Hm. It is about my past, i cut myself for a guy, i thought of committing suicide, i thought of having sex with him without any protection and have his baby and he will be mine or kill him and he will be mine. Ya, i know it is not interesting and funny. And you might think that i am insane. Ha ha. In a rush now. tell you the whole story when i can.

  114. is there a desperate addict in my life? yes.
    in one of my tutorials is uni 3 years ago, there was this one guy, lets call him M, who stood out from the crowd like a sore thumb. most prolly coz he was a 6fter asian who also adds up as a tennis player. and he really isn’t that bad looking. the tutor was asking us to introduce ourselves a bit and tell the class something about us that no one knows. and he tells the class he is an Arsenal supporter. now, in australia, and in that class, only a minority watches soccer. as soon as he said the word Arsenal, i looked up from my notepad and asked him ‘how can you support such a crappy team like Arsenal when you can support such a great team like Chelsea?’. he was speechless and could only stare at me with this horrified look that still makes me laugh till this very day.
    apparently that Arsenal-Chelsea comment got him hooked. he would say hi everytime he saw me and would try to take the seat next to mine in every tutorial/lecture. i lived in the co-ed hostel and i saw him very often because his close friend lived next door. he would call me up at 4am for nacho’s at the 24hr restaurant at the casino. he would embarass me by telling the whole tutorial that i told him secrets and would make up stupid sick stories and bring laughter into those boring lectures. he would tell old balding lecturers that i thought they were sexy.. the list goes on.
    the funniest thing? we seem to take at least one same subject every semester. so i could never escape. and i would see him around the clubs as well, so i got to know him pretty well, and we became super close friends.
    come 2nd year, even after all his courting antics, i developed a soft spot for him and he developed a much huger feelings for me. and we were inseperable. but we weren’t an official item altho everyone reckon we might as well be. him being from a well-off family [and driving a BMW X5 to uni], his style of proposing still amazes me till today.
    he did asked me a few times if i would marry him. i always laughed it off. the more i laughed the more determined he got.
    he took me to the mcD’s near his place one night for a quick bite. and funnily ordered me a bigmac instead of my usual nuggets. weirdly, he kept watching me eat that night. but being so hungry, i gobbled the bigmac and halfway through, i bit on sth hard while i was trying to swallow. and i almost choked on sth that felt like a marble. i spat out my burger and among the chewed up bun sat a ring. he felt so guilty, he kept apologizing. i saw the humorous side of it and laughed it off. seeing i was ok, he asked if i would marry him. i said no.
    few days later, we handed in our 40% assignment, which we worked our asses of on. and few weeks later, we were eagerly waiting to see who would get the higher score, for dinner would be on him/her. the [super cool] lecturer called the whole class and i got my paper back. after finished handing out everyone’s assignments, lecturer looked at me and told me i just lost 40% for not handing up anything. i was like ‘eh?!’ and showed him my marked assignment. in which the lecturer too back from me, looked at it, and told me he did NOT received anything from me at all and i most prolly marked my own assignment. i was horrified. almost in tears, i asked my coursemates if they saw me go up. and they said no. even the guy said no. i looked at my paper. 37%. HD. and before i burst out crying, the lecturer told me to see him in his office after lecture.
    after class, still shocked, and utterly depressed, i walked like a zombie into his office. and the door was locked so i took it that he wasn’t in. the lecturer arrived 10minutes later, said his greetings, unlocked his office door and held it open for me to walk in first.
    and what did i see?
    M. standing right smack in the middle. holding a bouquet of roses and that same ring that nearly choked the high heavens out of me, looking at me with the goofiest grin. it didn’t take me long to put the puzzle pieces together. and i was furious! and even after seeing my furious face, he still dare pop the question. i walked to him and punched his arm with all my might. our lecturer, whom M planned all this with could only laugh in guffaws of laughter. but still, i saw the humorous side of it.
    it has been 3 years now. and coming to 4. i am now back in malaysia and he now resides in sydney/singapore. he still calls. we still chat on msn. he still tells people embarrasing made up stories about me. and he still asks if i want to marry him.
    and still, i say no. with that, he playfully calls me a b*tch for being the hardest to get female he has ever meet.
    just 5days ago i got sth from him in the mail.
    what did i get?
    an orange shower cap in the shape of a dog.
    and a note written ‘marry me, b*tch!’
    i am still thinking what to get him that represents ‘NO’.
    ——————–
    any suggestions?

  115. is there a desperate addict in my life? yes.
    in one of my tutorials is uni 3 years ago, there was this one guy, lets call him M, who stood out from the crowd like a sore thumb. most prolly coz he was a 6fter asian who also adds up as a tennis player. and he really isn’t that bad looking. the tutor was asking us to introduce ourselves a bit and tell the class something about us that no one knows. and he tells the class he is an Arsenal supporter. now, in australia, and in that class, only a minority watches soccer. as soon as he said the word Arsenal, i looked up from my notepad and asked him ‘how can you support such a crappy team like Arsenal when you can support such a great team like Chelsea?’. he was speechless and could only stare at me with this horrified look that still makes me laugh till this very day.
    apparently that Arsenal-Chelsea comment got him hooked. he would say hi everytime he saw me and would try to take the seat next to mine in every tutorial/lecture. i lived in the co-ed hostel and i saw him very often because his close friend lived next door. he would call me up at 4am for nacho’s at the 24hr restaurant at the casino. he would embarass me by telling the whole tutorial that i told him secrets and would make up stupid sick stories and bring laughter into those boring lectures. he would tell old balding lecturers that i thought they were sexy.. the list goes on.
    the funniest thing? we seem to take at least one same subject every semester. so i could never escape. and i would see him around the clubs as well, so i got to know him pretty well, and we became super close friends.
    come 2nd year, even after all his courting antics, i developed a soft spot for him and he developed a much huger feelings for me. and we were inseperable. but we weren’t an official item altho everyone reckon we might as well be. him being from a well-off family [and driving a BMW X5 to uni], his style of proposing still amazes me till today.
    he did asked me a few times if i would marry him. i always laughed it off. the more i laughed the more determined he got.
    he took me to the mcD’s near his place one night for a quick bite. and funnily ordered me a bigmac instead of my usual nuggets. weirdly, he kept watching me eat that night. but being so hungry, i gobbled the bigmac and halfway through, i bit on sth hard while i was trying to swallow. and i almost choked on sth that felt like a marble. i spat out my burger and among the chewed up bun sat a ring. he felt so guilty, he kept apologizing. i saw the humorous side of it and laughed it off. seeing i was ok, he asked if i would marry him. i said no.
    few days later, we handed in our 40% assignment, which we worked our asses of on. and few weeks later, we were eagerly waiting to see who would get the higher score, for dinner would be on him/her. the [super cool] lecturer called the whole class and i got my paper back. after finished handing out everyone’s assignments, lecturer looked at me and told me i just lost 40% for not handing up anything. i was like ‘eh?!’ and showed him my marked assignment. in which the lecturer too back from me, looked at it, and told me he did NOT received anything from me at all and i most prolly marked my own assignment. i was horrified. almost in tears, i asked my coursemates if they saw me go up. and they said no. even the guy said no. i looked at my paper. 37%. HD. and before i burst out crying, the lecturer told me to see him in his office after lecture.
    after class, still shocked, and utterly depressed, i walked like a zombie into his office. and the door was locked so i took it that he wasn’t in. the lecturer arrived 10minutes later, said his greetings, unlocked his office door and held it open for me to walk in first.
    and what did i see?
    M. standing right smack in the middle. holding a bouquet of roses and that same ring that nearly choked the high heavens out of me, looking at me with the goofiest grin. it didn’t take me long to put the puzzle pieces together. and i was furious! and even after seeing my furious face, he still dare pop the question. i walked to him and punched his arm with all my might. our lecturer, whom M planned all this with could only laugh in guffaws of laughter. but still, i saw the humorous side of it.
    it has been 3 years now. and coming to 4. i am now back in malaysia and he now resides in sydney/singapore. he still calls. we still chat on msn. he still tells people embarrasing made up stories about me. and he still asks if i want to marry him.
    and still, i say no. with that, he playfully calls me a b*tch for being the hardest to get female he has ever meet.
    just 5days ago i got sth from him in the mail.
    what did i get?
    an orange shower cap in the shape of a dog.
    and a note written ‘marry me, b*tch!’
    i am still thinking what to get him that represents ‘NO’.
    ——————–
    any suggestions?
    udeng.yang@gmail.com

  116. hmm..since i read this blog..it make me think of someone that i love so much…
    it started like this…one very usual day when i’m in form 3(last year),i met this one girl while i was walking alone to the science lab in the school,it was the first time i see her,and at dat time my heart beat so fast..and donno wat to say to her,when i walk nearer to her,i gave her a smile,and she also give me back the smile,after dat,i juz walk past her,since dat very moment,i kept thinking of her,and ways to know her,and i know i starting to love her,cuz she was a pretty girl…
    after that time…i got met her a few times..but i was juz too scared to talk to her…
    since dat day…she always appear in my mind,espeacially when i want to sleep…and i kept worry that she have boyfriend already…
    until the beginning of this year..
    i feel so happy+scared cause she was my classmate this year…i’m happy because i can see her everyday at school..and i scared because i still don’t have the power to talk to her and i don’t want my friends to know that i love her.
    until one very lucky day,something good come to my mind..i think(if i’m too scared to talk to her in the class cause i starting to scared when i saw her face..,then why don’t i chat with her in msn??)to talk to her,but without facing each other…so i quickly go to friendster n search for her profile(coz i heard my friends say she got friendster)after viewing so much profile for so many hours..i was so excited and happy when i saw her picture appear suddenly in 1 of my friends profile n i quickly click it,and it was her!!then without thinking too much,i straightly add her…since she also show her msn address..i also add her in the msn…
    so until one night…she got online in msn,so i use this chance to know her and chat with her without face to face…
    but i’m still scared to let her know i love her so much…so sometimes we chat..we juz chat about school stuff…i so hope that i can tell her”i love you” one day..but i juz donno how to…
    n i am soooo desperate for her to love me…but i’m afraid it won’t happen…
    thats the end of my love life.. hope you enjoy reading it!!

  117. raymond, (X6)
    pls lah stop posting the same thing so many times…your post so long again
    i spent make whole day reading this page n refreshing it to read new ones …i think more r posting to express their feelings instead of winning the phone (which is a gud thing)

  118. This is so evil, I am sure that I will end up on the 18th layer of Hell.
    My sister is dating Jay.
    All her life, my sister sworn off men like him. My sister hated loud, pimply-faced boys who drove cars with huge-ass exhausts and spoilers made to fly. We used laugh at them till our tummies hurt.
    To be fair, Jay is a decent guy who speaks well. My sister was smitten by him. And because she’s turned into a desperate addict like that, she has forgotten that she has been dissing Ah Bengs like that for the longest of time.
    My sister wishes that his face was much smoother. She only kisses his face when he is having a good face day, which is quite infrequent. Or else, she has to find a spot where there are tiny zits and pretend that those pimples are magical dots. Her trick is to keep here eyes closed at all times and go to her la-la land.
    She cringes everytime his car engine roars but pretends that it’s cool. She’ll sink lower into the seat just in case someone she knows drives past. But she never insults his car because it would bruise his ego.
    His current ringtone is the Tokyo Drift “Fast and Furious” and my sister defends him everytime we laugh at his Ah Bengness.
    Hanging out with Jay’s friends is the lowest in her priority list, but she makes an effort. They don’t speak English, so she mastered Manglish. She even offered them English lessons. Specifically “At The Workshop 101”. Now they don’t say “Eckjos” anymore.
    Oh joy, things people do for love.
    My sister is a sweetheart. Wait a minute, I don’t have a sister.
    Actually, I was talking about me.

  119. hmm..since i read this blog..it make me think of someone that i love so much…
    it started like this…one very usual day when i’m in form 3(last year),i met this one girl while i was walking alone to the science lab in the school,it was the first time i see her,and at dat time my heart beat so fast..and donno wat to say to her,when i walk nearer to her,i gave her a smile,and she also give me back the smile,after dat,i juz walk past her,since dat very moment,i kept thinking of her,and ways to know her,and i know i starting to love her,cuz she was a pretty girl…
    after that time…i got met her a few times..but i was juz too scared to talk to her…
    since dat day…she always appear in my mind,espeacially when i want to sleep…and i kept worry that she have boyfriend already…
    until the beginning of this year..
    i feel so happy+scared cause she was my classmate this year…i’m happy because i can see her everyday at school..and i scared because i still don’t have the power to talk to her and i don’t want my friends to know that i love her.
    until one very lucky day,something good come to my mind..i think(if i’m too scared to talk to her in the class cause i starting to scared when i saw her face..,then why don’t i chat with her in msn??)to talk to her,but without facing each other…so i quickly go to friendster n search for her profile(coz i heard my friends say she got friendster)after viewing so much profile for so many hours..i was so excited and happy when i saw her picture appear suddenly in 1 of my friends profile n i quickly click it,and it was her!!then without thinking too much,i straightly add her…since she also show her msn address..i also add her in the msn…
    so until one night…she got online in msn,so i use this chance to know her and chat with her without face to face…
    but i’m still scared to let her know i love her so much…so sometimes we chat..we juz chat about school stuff…i so hope that i can tell her”i love you” one day..but i juz donno how to…
    n i am soooo desperate for her to love me…but i’m afraid it won’t happen…
    thats the end of my love life.. hope you enjoy reading it!!

  120. alright i really need a new phone not for myself but rather for my mum coz her birthday’s coming up and well she needs a new phone coz the one that she’s been having for the past five years is breaking down on her right now… sadly my part time job can’t earn me enough to get the phone in time
    so how desperate am i? i think i will not only write i love kenny sia and run around naked in bukit bintang but i’ll also dress up as a french maid clean your house for the day, wash your car, cook your meals and even talk in a french accent ” is there anything i can do for you monsieur”
    *sigh* the things we do in the name of love

  121. gosh, with everyone writing about their infatuation over another being, hopefully my story brings something new.
    The desperate addict? Me. The object of my addiction? my smelly bolster, Moon-moon!!!
    I had Moon-moon ever since i was a baby. Moon-moon is made out of cotton enclosed in a case made from the kind of white cloth they use to make nurses’ uniforms or doctor’s coat? yup the white slightly glossy cloth which i reckon my mum got it from her dental clinic.
    ok that was around 19 years ago. Today, Moon-moon is in a shade of grey due to years of wear and tear. Also, there are numerous holes and add on patches on it’s body which are all thanks to my grandma’s handiwork to salvage my so called pathetic bolster. Really , Kenny, a picture does speak a thousand words. Moon-moon’s current situation speaks best with a photo which i have it in my phone.
    Anyway, to me Moon-moon is the cutest and best playmate cum friend cum sleeping mate ever.
    I would hug it to sleep everynight without fail even when I travel. That was during my primary school years. Even when i got teased endlessly by my family on how my (seemingly) dubious looking bolster will get detained and chucked by the immigration officers during luggage checks. Of course they never did 🙂
    One thing bout Moon-moon is that everyone at home hated it most probably cos it reeked of my saliva smell. Hehe.. I’d drool at night when i sleep and poor moon-moon will be at the receiving end of my drool. haha.. my siblings always cringed in disgust whenever i dangle my bolster in front of them. That’s my way for getting back at them for the endless tauntings.
    You know what they say bout such affection is only a phase? and how kids outgrow them sooner or later? Guess mine’s never. Although i have survived without moon-moon every now and then but it wouldn’t be a good night’s sleep without it. I now stay in a hostel with roommates and it would be totally embarassing being seen with my ugly bolster which in everyone else’s eye, is just a lump of cotton, and so i left it at home. But whenever i’m home, i’ll be rushing to look for my dearest.
    I think my parents have even giving hope on curing this addiction of mine as many past attempts at it have failed. I even picked it up and forced my mum to wash it when one of my siblings dropped it into a drain.
    Oh yeah, i’d get really upset whenever my mum takes it for a wash cos it’ll smell like detergent which was unfamiliar and so… man made
    Also, i guess i really have a vivid sense of imagination. I can make up a face from the creases on moon-moon which were cause by the uneven handiwork of whoever that sewed moon-moon. And i’d always imagined moon-moon to be a giant albino worm. Cos of it’s long cylindrical shape, it probably looked more like a blown up maggot but i like to picture moon-moon as something more pleasant of course.
    Bottom line is, i really love my moonie and i’ll definitely definitely bring it with me whenever i go after leaving this hostel. i feel kinda guilty for abandoning moonmoon at home for almost 2 years now. Sobs 🙁
    My sister even joked how i will carry moon moon instead of a bouquet of flowers in future when i walk down the aisle.
    But i have this sickening feeling that moonmoon won’t last for long as it is slowly breaking apart. The current piece of white cloth can’t last for long as there are countless holes everywhere and it wouldn’t be the same anymore if grandma makes a new casing cos moon moon’s face will be gone!
    Although i have substitutes now , nothing can ever come close to giving me to joy and comfort moon moon has brought me all these years .
    And, right, that’s all.

  122. *cough*
    I’ve submitted a story above .
    but I have another I’d like to share.
    There are two parts to this story.
    Part I
    It seems as though I have this
    magnetism towards obese girls I dont know why.
    It happened around two years back , if my memory serves me right. Lets just refer to her as Jaws.
    In the corner of my eye , I spot a message in friendster from the relatively hot looking girl . With the hourglass figure .
    So I chatted with her for a while .
    I was 15 that time , and I found it to be something to brag about . The whole concept of my-balls-are-bigger-than-yours factor
    according to kennysia’s concept.
    So one day I was in Amcorp (again)
    I lost my phone , she insisted on coming to er, cheer me up . Although she didnt really need to because I always lose my phone
    My friends were laughing . At that point I didnt know why. Then I saw a rather man-sized girl walking towards me.For some reason my friend started singing the “Jaws theme song”.. I found out later that it is because she as sharp and seperated teeth just like a shark.
    and when I turned around . There she was. My friends didnt even have to common decency to tell me that she looks like a monster.(camera angles
    does wonders to a person’s figure)
    She told me that , she argued with her mom just to come and see me and that her mom won’t let her back in also that she would be sleeping in the park . So I offered her to sleep at my place but she said “No” and I saw mosquito bitten marks above her chest . So being curious I asked what was it. and she said
    “..My father abused me”
    …yeaah.
    So when she was supposedly sleeping in the park . I saw her online and she said that
    “Im in my friend’s house now”
    “O..h.. n.o.. her parents.. are chasing me out..”
    and when I called her house . Her brother picked up and said
    “Oh , [insert name here]? She’s sleeping in her room”
    By then I was rendered speechless.. But , I didnt wanna burst her bubble.
    Part II
    [note: this one is about another girl but the
    story is relevant]

    So few weeks later , I she was in Ikano and
    I was in 1utama so I decided to pay her a visit.
    Then along came this other huge chick
    That I thought was rather friendly .
    Considering she would bearhug a person
    she just met.

    I meant to say , hug. I swear
    No really.
    So anyways , I talked to her for a while and the
    Next day I received a text message from her
    Telling me that she wants me to be her boyfriend.
    I turned her down nicely.
    ..But you see when she said she “wants” what
    She really meant was she “demands . Because , few weeks later I found myself cornered
    By a bunch of Gold headed ah bengs .
    The leader of their pack has hair so gold
    You’d be blind looking at it for more than
    5 minutes. So anyways he proceeded to blatantly
    screaming on the top of his lungs.
    ” YOU BROKE MY SISTERS HEART AR?[insert any
    profanity you can think of here] “

    They threatened to beat the shit out of me.
    Thank god, my bunch of friends were around
    and when they heard the reason why Im cornered
    ..They bursted in laughter .
    ..Man , you have no idea how many of these
    stories I have.

  123. I have a friend.
    She was a girl and shes a desperate addict.
    My best mate, was head over heels for her and she wasnt the type that would be ideal in a relationship. So they got together. It was sweet.
    7 months later, my best mate couldnt take it anymore. He didnt talk to her or anything. She broke down because she loved him but she coudnt show it.
    So she created an imaginary guy. From Sweden. With no pictures, only stories that are fairytale like to brag to her friends. Everyone knew she was lying. But she kept going on. Till she shifted schools and I havent heard since.
    Wheres my phone!?!?!??

  124. Dear shishi,
    Your story is interestingly different from the rest. But you’re definitely a desparate addict for your moon-moon and your story is nice to read though. You have one of my vote. 🙂
    Cheers.

  125. the phone is so tempting…this is my story:
    i had this friend who had a crush on me that will take my photos and edit them..mind u…it’s not doing those photoshop to make me flawless. He actually cut my head and paste it onto a model’s body, send the photo to me through msn and said i’m pretty…u can imagine me looking at my own head on a model’s body, not knowing whether to agree with him onot…and the day before i left to further my studies he gave me an envelope with the photoS(me in a model) and a white A4 paper inside, saying that i could write his name on the paper whenever i think of him..and some days later he’ll take the paper back and count how many times i’ve been missing him…this is really call desperate huh…i said
    “scary”…and of coz he didnt succeed:)

  126. I am about to spill out intimate, obsessive (not forgetting to mention LURID) details to a virtual stranger. Desperate.
    I have this MAJOR obsession with My Chemical Romance’s bassist, Mikey Way. Apart from the usual shennanigans compulsive groupies do, (i.e. downloading 38798468746857 pictures of the same person, creating online fan clubs, emailing stalkeresquely, etc.), I have (to date):
    1- Convinced my boyfriend to name our first son MICHAEL JAMES, after Mr. Way, of course.
    2- Photoshopped every one of Mikey’s girlfriend’s picture. Not the typical myface-herbody stuff (she’s fatter than Fonseka ok!). More like drawn-on moustaches and moles and horrible horrible acne.
    3- Become the proud owner of SIX copies of My Chemical Romance’s album. One for display purposes (UNTOUCHED. Never removed from box), one for continuous playing,one for my car, one for bf’s car. Another for a friend who’d occasionally chauffeur me around. And one for insurance purposes (you never know!!)
    4- Planned out the FULL assasination of his girlfriend. Which i MIGHT carry out. But hey, a new phone may throw me off rampaging destruction.
    5- Dreamt of him. Which details i shall not enclose.
    Maybe i should start priting out his pictures and putting them next to the bible also!
    I am using a k500i which HANGS and plays 2 songs! i might even write ILOVEKENNYSIA.COM on my ass (nice one, mind you) and walk down Dataran Merdeka !

  127. There was this “below average” guy (fat, short, ugly…) who like this “above heaven” girl (slim, tall, pretty…) . So this guy try to kao this girl, and this girl try to avoid this poor guy.
    Can say that the girl “hates” him so much, there was once occasion where the guy waited for the girl outside a shop, when the girl come out from the shop and saw the guy, the girl feel annoyed and go back inside the shop.
    But this guy never stop trying, he use all idea, tricks, tips he can use. Flower, chocolate, call, sms, msn, icq, snail mail, mamak, nasi goreng, maggie goreng, 911 plane, klcc, kennysia.com, bla bla….
    He just loved her so much, now both of them are together lovingly. Live happily ever after.

  128. i dun know if my story would win me d priced n coveted hp. but here goes my best.
    im not sure of how 2 categorize dis as; juz a freak admirer or a LESB**** crush (not me mind u). itz about dis classmate of mine. we shall label her W. her cute looks and beautiful eyes attract a loooottt of admirers around my skool n other skools. d problem is, im scooling in a convent, obviously n all gals skool. deres dis gal, ill label her X, 3 yers junior my age having dis … weird obsession over W. from wart i know, she memorized my class schedule n sneaks in2 my class wen we r having lessons in d lab 2 giv W sum ‘gifts’!!!! W told d whole class. d presents was wartz suitable 4 couples ( u know.. love shapes, couples dis n dat…)….. X would sumtimes oso bring her camera on certain days (hari koko, wartever majlis dat requires d morning session 2 join wif d afternoon session) 2 snap W’s pics. not 1 or 2. not even 10. X hav a gargangtuan album 2 hold all d pics she snap on !!!! to now, im not sure izzit dat d oni album she hav or is dere more. besides all dese, X would also send W valentine gifts………. n wrote W a love poem. W refused 2 reveal d contents as W is mighty fearful dat i would laugh at d content (actually, i think i laughed 2 loudly wen she broke d news on her receiving d letter) dis had obviously sent chills down W’s spine. 2 add on d chill is dat everytime W pass by X by coincidence or anything, X would stare at W without even blinking her eyes ( W insisted i observe n seriously, i cant keep my eyes 2 long on coz i was about 2 burst out laughing again). another incident is dat since X is in d afternoon session while d upper secondary is in d morning session, she would pass by my class a few dozen times on specific days ( mondays, wednesdays fridays) juz 2 sneak a peek (a veri obvious 1) at W. i sat d nearest 2 d door n obviously know wart is happening around. W got scared n she would try 2 close d class door (bcoz im lazy. aniway, X is sneaking peeks at W) which always end wif d teacher getting curious n d whole class laughing hysterically (d whole class know about dis) as according 2 X’s fren (veri normal in contrast wif X) dat actually…. she knows every single personal details of W rite down…. 2 b precise, infinite. i believe she also memorized her friendster profile n every single bits unimportant 2 our eyes. X is still rather d same towards W despite W’s ignorance over every scary attempt X made on W. for now, W is only hoping dat d exam will stretch a lil while longer (quite a contrast 2 most student’s wish) as it seems dat X’s ‘visiting’ our class was reduced during exams. but den again, i wont know wart X is gonna come up wif wen d exams r over. X hav a veri veri big probability of running in2 my class n i dunno… propose W or juz kiss her O_O … d tot of those obviusly juz freaks W out of her wits but brings roar of laughters among us, W’s fren.

  129. i dun know if my story would win me d priced n coveted hp. but here goes my best.
    im not sure of how 2 categorize dis as; juz a freak admirer or a LESB**** crush (not me mind u). itz about dis classmate of mine. we shall label her W. her cute looks and beautiful eyes attract a loooottt of admirers around my skool n other skools. d problem is, im scooling in a convent, obviously n all gals skool. deres dis gal, ill label her X, 3 yers junior my age having dis … weird obsession over W. from wart i know, she memorized my class schedule n sneaks in2 my class wen we r having lessons in d lab 2 giv W sum ‘gifts’!!!! W told d whole class. d presents was wartz suitable 4 couples ( u know.. love shapes, couples dis n dat…)….. X would sumtimes oso bring her camera on certain days (hari koko, wartever majlis dat requires d morning session 2 join wif d afternoon session) 2 snap W’s pics. not 1 or 2. not even 10. X hav a gargangtuan album 2 hold all d pics she snap on !!!! to now, im not sure izzit dat d oni album she hav or is dere more. besides all dese, X would also send W valentine gifts………. n wrote W a love poem. W refused 2 reveal d contents as W is mighty fearful dat i would laugh at d content (actually, i think i laughed 2 loudly wen she broke d news on her receiving d letter) dis had obviously sent chills down W’s spine. 2 add on d chill is dat everytime W pass by X by coincidence or anything, X would stare at W without even blinking her eyes ( W insisted i observe n seriously, i cant keep my eyes 2 long on coz i was about 2 burst out laughing again). another incident is dat since X is in d afternoon session while d upper secondary is in d morning session, she would pass by my class a few dozen times on specific days ( mondays, wednesdays fridays) juz 2 sneak a peek (a veri obvious 1) at W. i sat d nearest 2 d door n obviously know wart is happening around. W got scared n she would try 2 close d class door (bcoz im lazy. aniway, X is sneaking peeks at W) which always end wif d teacher getting curious n d whole class laughing hysterically (d whole class know about dis) as according 2 X’s fren (veri normal in contrast wif X) dat actually…. she knows every single personal details of W rite down…. 2 b precise, infinite. i believe she also memorized her friendster profile n every single bits unimportant 2 our eyes. X is still rather d same towards W despite W’s ignorance over every scary attempt X made on W. for now, W is only hoping dat d exam will stretch a lil while longer (quite a contrast 2 most student’s wish) as it seems dat X’s ‘visiting’ our class was reduced during exams. but den again, i wont know wart X is gonna come up wif wen d exams r over. X hav a veri veri big probability of running in2 my class n i dunno… propose W or juz kiss her O_O … d tot of those obviusly juz freaks W out of her wits but brings roar of laughters among us, W’s fren.

  130. hahaha well i dont live in malaysia but my dad is there so 😛 if im ever LUCKY enough to have a good story which i doubt 😛 he can alwyas bring it back to perth for me 🙂
    but yeh here is one of the funniest obsession i’ve ever came across.
    Back in standard 6, i was a school prefect (yeh one of those student with a bright red tie bossing people around haha) but yeh, my prefect head was this girl thts in the class next to mine but thats not the point. 2 of my classmates, haha not one but TWO! they are both good friends and funny enough they end up liking the girl and since i would be guarding my staircase every monday wed and friday and the girl would come around to sign my “log book”.
    Both of my friends would always hide around the area just to spy on her, they would walk along the cooridor 2 storey up and look down @ her haha, its funny how far they went just to look at her, they would bring cameras to school and start taking photos and i think they actually framed them up :S rofl.. lets not go into detail what else they did with those photos shall we but yeh i still remember one of them went up to her to confess his love to her but she end up lookin @ him then turn around n walk off (lol poor guy)
    6 yrs on, i still talk to one of my friend and the girl and hmm guess what, my friend actually moved to perth few yrs ago and the last time i mentioned to him about the girl, he was so clueless as if nthing happened before! call him the “short term memory” guy i suppose 🙂
    but yeh 🙂
    thats all from me 🙂 yum.. milk choc 😛 i like haha

  131. This is just in case you missed my previous post since there are sooooo many post after mine….
    This is my story…
    This was way back in 1998….
    When i was in form 1, i started going to BM tuition and there, there was this guy named Calvin. We talked and all like normal friends would until he started trying to impress me.
    The first thing that he did was send me flowers, while i was in class…I was shocked…cuz i didn’t expect anything of that kind…. then he started giving me chocolates.. as a nice person would do..i just thank him for it and kinda ignore him….
    Then in tuition, he tried to impress me by waiting for my car to come pick me up before he went home (he walks). while i’m inside the house, he would come and tell me that my dad is here to come pick me up..etc…
    The creepiest thing was that on his handphone, he would put my number under names like “my darling”, “honey”….Freaked me out lar…he would also act all cool and stuff like that just to impress me….while me and my friends would just laugh our heads off( i know i’m mean).
    He would ask me, would i be his girlfriend many times, over the phone and over the internet….so…being young and naive and also trying to get him off my back…i told him that i wasn’t ready for a relationship (which was true cuz i was only in form 1 that time). telling him that maybe when i finish form 5 then i’ll be ready for any relationship….
    He even sent me a letter, with broken english(he didn’t speak much english). it was hilarious when i read it…my mom found the letter and told me ” if that guy is trying to tackle you…tell him to go improve his english first!” hahahahaha (until this day, i still have that letter kept in a box)
    *fast forward*
    In form 5…
    after not talking to him for awhile..He called my house….saying that we are now in form 5….would i give him a chance….I WAS SHOCKED OUT OF MY BRAINS THAT HE CALLED!!! and he remembered what i said when i was in form 1!!!i was freaked out and didn’t know how to react…so i told him that i was still not ready(hahahaha) and just told him i didn’t like him…nothing happened after that…
    Since then,I’ve lost contact with him….and sometimes wonder where he is now… and until now…my ex-tuition mates still tease me about he tried so badly to impress me!!!!
    PICK ME, KENNY……i’ll then try my best to impress you!!!! HUGS AND KISSES

  132. Hi Kenny,
    Been a reader of your blog for quite sometime and Im quite envy tat u could travel around and get free things. Im desperate to win the phone for my wife as I love her very much.
    I stay in Kajang. Let me tell you how I proposed to my wife. I wake up in the morning(I was onleave and my gf dont know about it). Drive to Cameron. Buy 30 fresh Doz of roses (also buy some vege for my mother). Drove back (120 ~ 140kmh). Reach Sri Petaling at 5 plus. Go to Friends house. Do something to the flowers.
    Go back house. Hide the flowers (with a cheap ring)inside car. Giv my gf a call… fetch her and drove to putrajaya and propose. Hid the real ring in my pocket. After propose she look one kind to the cheap ring but she accept it. On the way back…. I stop half way and gave her the real ring. In the end, she happy and I also happy. We are now husband and wife. =) The outcome of the final product is at my blog there. Feel free to hav a look. http://www.mahjongman.blogspot.com

  133. A has been so madly in love with B. Things were a bliss
    until they broke up two years into the relationship.
    A wasn’t ready to let go. She has to do something, she can’t let it go that easily.
    She kept calling B, but he just is never home. She dug out all his friend’s no and starts to call them one by one.
    This was a painful moment for A. What’s worse, B called her up one fine day, told he was leaving for
    overseas & when A wanted to send him off to the airport, B politely said no stating there was no need. She insisted &
    all he said was “whatever”.
    A could feel her heart beating profusely. She knew she had to see him one last time. The final goodbye.
    So A asked her friend D to bring her to the airport the next day. So A called up B at his home just to check
    on the time of the flight. Suprisingly nobody answered the house phone.
    A was frantic. She was afraid that the plane might have left. So her friend D suggested A to call up his dad.
    So she did call him up. He said “Oh, he left with the airline people 30 mins earlier” What was he talking about?
    A was puzzled by the whole conversation. Not satisfied by his mean old dad’s answer, she drag D all the way to his house
    Everything was quiet. Even the curtains were pulled down. Then A called out his name several times. The neighbour must think
    she was some crazy girl.
    She went to the extreme of going to his best friend house frantically knocking the door only to find him telling her
    “Oh he has reached already, he called me up” At that point, A’s world was turned upside down. She knew he was lying & everyone
    around him has plotted to deceive A.
    Call it fate or destiny, A met B at a cafe during the night. Yes, at the same town on the same night, when everyone around him
    said he flew off. B was shocked indeed. He looked as if he’s seen a ghost. A sat down n talk calmly with B.
    B said all the while when she was talking to his friend at his house,looking for him, he was hiding in his cupboard.
    Applauses!
    They were all good actors, B & his people.
    Funny, how even his parents has to unhook to telephone line because it rang too many times that morning.
    One was a desperate trying to get back in and the other was desperate trying to get out. Both were desperate still in the name
    love.
    This actually happens to be me. I think I was really desperate at that time. Desperate trying to get back in!!
    Ok, Kenny hand over the phone or else I will keep on calling until you feel the need to unplug the phone off the hook or this days, switch off your HANDPHONE, or change the no. & hide in the cupboard. ;P

  134. erm…try my luck here..
    there’s one guy that actually sings to me almost every night through skype (of course with guitar..music always make life better)..we nvr met b4, he sings whenever i’m sad,or i’m happy or just when i got nothing to do and wanted to find someone to let me torture..of course he will sing during my insomia nights too..
    dunno how many times, he sings till i fall asleep and let him heard my snorring ..hahaha..erm…gals do snore sometimes k…especially when they are tired…haha
    but trust me…oni very soft…keke!!
    i dunno whether i’m addicted to it or not…
    but i felt that there’s something missing if i don’t see him online…and like most ppl will do… i will set my status to be invisble and when he is online, suddenly, my status will “automatically” become online..hehe
    i’m really not sure what it takes to be counted as desperate…i think i’m so desperate about the current feeling that as the fact of it, i’d turn down a lot of times of his invitation to meet out..
    because i know that, nothing is forever..even if u’re addicted to it now…the feels will dissapear just like that one day…maybe at the moment when u r shitting after 1 weeks of constipation..dum~ the feelings dissapear d
    ;p
    so, i really dunno…i think i’m so desperate to hold on our relationship on this stage just like that that i nvr show him any of my feelings and nvr try to accept any promises from him…
    i think i’m so desperate till i won’t tell him anything about my feelings toward him forever…
    but if u like my story….straight away tell me lar… dun la so desperate till keep the white choc with u forever and dun dare to tell me that u like my story k…
    hahhaa….
    p/s: hope that u will stay….
    hahaha..forgot about the offer from perth k?
    mali mali hong!!!!

  135. There was this time i was so desperate to know this girl that i joined the gym’s stepdancing class to try to find an opening so i can talk to her. Well, its not really something that outrageous other than embarassing myself in a 99% female’s class (that 1% is me), and making a fool out of myself by not concentrating on the instructions. This happen like once a week for 3 months at least, with me shying away on each “talk” attempt.
    The irony was that i find it ok to embarass myself and not ok to talk to her.. oh well…

  136. my god whats up with raymond and lyn. for god’s sake, stop spamming. OR just hit the button ONCE. surely you dont have a turbo clicker mouse or something.

  137. owh…
    I had a friend and she’s very very gorgeous.
    Many guys are after her BUT unfortunately she is already with another guy. That guy is considered lucky coz she’s very loyal towards him.
    However this friend of mine was not that lucky coz she has the looks and the body anyone could die for.
    1 day, someone stalked her, not only a normal person ok! He’s a sick sick pervert..
    I’ve seen his messages before!
    He said sometin like,
    I wana fuck you so hard till ur ass crack.. (wtf!)
    and everynight i masturbate thinking of u..
    I wana have sex with u..
    We tried to tracked down this pervert but failed.
    At last, he found out that we tried to find out who he is and he started to hate my fren.. (what did my fren do??)
    Then ah, not only that, he also, posted up rumours that my friend is no more virgin and that she’s a cheap bitch.. (wad the??)
    This kinda stalker is not only anooying but damn scary ok!
    Imagine someone violate ur life lidat!

  138. that is not my real name.the email address was created for this competition on purpose.why?because im still afraid that he might get to me; or even worse, realise that it’s him im talking about in this blog(if he does read it la).
    it all started way back in form 4 when i broke up with him, just as he transferred schools to be with me.why? becausen he was getting all weird on me about how i should not stand in canteen lines *the lines in malaysian schools are more like cramped sardines grappling for one bait* because my “assets” would touch the back of the guy in front.swt rite.when i told him not to be ridiculous, he said “guys can FEEL it wan”dotdotdot.
    anyways.got really freaked and left the feller.it doesnt end there man. he continued calling me, threatening to tell my parents about us (my parents are relli strict) if i didnt get back with him. he kept on saying “we need to fix this” and when i asked him what’s “this” he said “i dunno..just..this” it was scary to the point that i was crying on the phone begging him to leave me alone.the calls happened every single day.if i didnt answer the cell phone, he would call my house.and the STRANGE thing was, he would jus let it ring once and then it would stop. can you imagine? incessant calls from 3pm till about 2 am in the morning every 5-10 minutes; with just ONE RING and then stop.ring then stop.ring then stop.
    my parents were getting so annoyed.i think one day got about 100 over calls from him.he still continuously tried to get my attention in tuition and in school and i had to make sure that at least one friend was around me in school in case he tried anything.when i told him my cell was spoilt, he gave me HIS.
    one day, i was walking down to a shopping centre near my house when he msged me saying thet i had better go n meet him if not he would come and meet me himself. he said “i can c u. youre wearing blue jeans and the black babytee shirt” i really was wearing that man.omg.
    that was when i changed my number.after that, it still did not stop.at 3 am one night he called my house (it rang for longer than once finally)and i picked up, fearful because my parents would kill me if they saw me on the phone so late. he said that he was outside the house. i didnt believe him and told him to ring the doorbell.it rang.i slammed the phone down on him. till today i still dont know why he did that.
    there was talk of a restraining order but i felt bad so i called his dad to talk. YOU KNOW WHAT HIS DAD SAID?? “oh please help XXX, he is depressed.i think you should be his friend..” AND IM LIKE HELLO.HES STALKING ME.it didnt end.
    after a while the calls stopped, i guess he found someone new to stalk. but till today im still scared la.but its funny though if u look in a certain perspective of how he was so desperate, and of all the illogical things he did.i still dont know why he did those things, and why he would just ring once and then stop.
    oh yar.he burned this cd for me and he recorded his voice for me to hear, begging me to go back to him..about an hour long of his crying and begging.tulan.dem scary lo.
    but funny also la.sucha desperate addict.not like im tat pretty oso.haha giler rite.if i dont win for humour hopefully ill win because i survived his craziness.XD
    im 18 now and thankfully, so far, he never found out my new cell num, as well as me msn account.i blocked him.heh.

  139. I have a friend,k,who was dumped by his girlfriend,P, because apparently she wants to concentrate fully on her SPM.but everyone knows she’s just interested in K’s best friend.Despite being dumped,K,started a blog to write down EVERYTHING that happened and is happening between them.He will also isolate himself from the others.Besides that,he’ll buy her gifts on their “monthly”,each costing at least a few hundred,so anyway,on her birthday,he bought her a TIARA,a very expensive one,and told her that she’ll always be his queen,but on the other hand,P ignores K’s existance,and treats K worse and worse each day,K couldn’t take it anymore because P is also a wanted girl,everybody wants her to be their girlfriend,so K spreaded rumours that he has already popped her cherry so that other guys won’t have interest in her anymore,and the rumour spreaded around school,P got really pissed at K,and really ignored K,as in they used to talk maybe a little ,but after that she totally doesn’t acknowledge him anymore,so anyway,K did many things to apologise to P and tried to tell everyone in school that he lied about the rumours.finally king did something that i do not know,and won her heart again.

  140. i have a story about my friend, who is 15 years old.
    there is this girl who is a year older than him, she was his dream girl, he kept on telling all his friends, including me that she had everything. she was hot, sexy and she had the personality, she was athletic. during the 2 month holiday, the girl would be online on msn at around 12 am till 3 am. so he would go online and just wait there and hoping she would say hi or something, every night, he would stay up. he did not dare make the first move. he even changed his msn nickname to ” i’m feeling bored, anyone up for a chat?” hoping she would get the message. this went on for weeks. he even asked friends for advice, everyone told him he was a desperate dumbass. i felt so bad for him. when school started in january, the obsession went on. during valentines day, he sent her roses anonymously. but on that same day, she got into a relationship and my friend’s heart was torn into pieces. everyone felt bad for him. he got over her and in the end he wrote a song about her. a really angry song. funny guy i tell you. haha.
    thats all. the LG phone looks really delicious. yummy

  141. i know this is over and all. but “desperate” reminds me of a girl in my college. she is well known as being weird. (and the whole college actually rejected her okay) it happened when we just started college. she was madly in love with a guy in my class (which i dont find him THAT charming) and she stalks him! somehow, somewhat, she got his handphone number, housephone number, and even his mother’s handphone number that NOBODY has it including his close friends!
    and usually he leaves his bag in the library and head over to play foosball. and the next thing he knows, the girl called him and told him, what he has in bag, and he owns a PINK pencil, and where he puts his files, and what textbook he brings. and then she was like, “i am so happy that youre not angry at me for looking through your bag”… the fact is, he was super angry, but he said (his mom taught him) he’d not scold or hit a girl. so erm. yeah. its freaky. and then, she goes to his friendster everyday, added him in his msn, and her email was seriousdesire (with diff spelling) and she log onto internet in college just to stare at his picture over and over again and SMILE alone!
    after that, he left college, for good. lol.
    and well, the girl is still well-known as, being weird. and strange.

  142. Doing the most UNMANLY and KIASU thing evaaaa !!!!..
    Lining up since 7 am in the morning for hours on end at McDonalds just to buy her Hello Kitty. Manage to get 2 pairs of wedding themed Hello Kitties.
    BIATTCCCCCCHHH! She was already my gf that time and she wanted me to prove my sincerity..
    NEVER AGAIN WILL I DO THIS FOR ANY PUSSY!

  143. WOAH!!!!KENNY R U ENJOYING READING ALL THE ABOVE ENTRY? SOME OF QUITE FUNNY. BUT ALL ENTRIES R BOY WANT/CHASE GIRL OR THE OTHER WAY ROUND & WHAT THEY DID 2 DO THAT. HUMMMMMMM!!! I WANDER IF MINE ENTRY IS ‘OUT OF TOPIC’.HE! HE! ENJOY USELF.

  144. My ex was problem. A huge one.
    But his mom was an even larger problem.
    A week after he announced to his parents that we were officially going out, she happened to mention casually during the course of a conversation that she thought Isabella Rose would be a lovely name if WE were to give HER a grandaughter in the future
    And she had this weird dreamy look on her face when she said it.
    Like the heavens had opened up and she could hear the sounds of angels singing and holy trumpets blowing or something 0_0
    Demented? Yup.
    Crazed? Uh-huh.
    Obsessed? Definitely.
    Thing was, she thought this kind of behaviour would tip the scales in favour of her son. It was like she was exuding some kind of patented warm n’ fuzzy family aura, which she wanted to engulf me in. No escape, no way, no how.
    Next time I meet a mummy’s boy and his puppet- master mom I’m going to leap, not run for the nearest exit.

  145. Pathetic, your story is so sad. I feel for you man.
    iwilleatyourpetfrogalive, that is definitely the funniest story I’ve ever heard so far.
    ShadowFox, wahahahaaa! That was such an idiotic thing to do!
    All other commenters, I generally favour stories that end up with the target rejecting the addict, instead of a “happily ever after” ending. But do what you want eh.

  146. i can’t even go to the TOILET without him running after me.
    and its not easy to face the world after having him running arond the school screaming ” I LOVE YY ”
    oh and guess what.
    i was std 3 then.
    O_O
    who says primary kiddos are innocent?

  147. Hmmm…. I couldn’t remember when it all started but I think it began last year, that veri ‘honeymoon’ year for us. Lets call the gal P n d guy N. P is my fren while N is n outsider from another scool who freaked every1 out of their living daylites. P juz begun her tuition n was sitting wif her comrades behind him. While deep in2 conversation wif her frens, N suddenly turned behind. At 1st it was oni 2 ask 4 a pen or so. Later, dat day itself, he, again, suddenly out of d blues turned behind and started introducing “ hi im N can I know ur name?” which obviously sent P’s fren in2 a h*ll of a laughing time while P blushed like a baboons butt. Out of courtesy, P intro herself but she regretted her life 4 dis. It turns out dat he actually likes her (obviously).
    Things start 2 go out of hand day by day as he ‘tried’ to approach her which sounded A LOT more like stalking n this became a frequent joke around P n her comrades. It was d usual “ juz accept him la, u poison him den u can get all his money lor… (apparently, he is a rich kid) “ which usually ends wif P blushing n getting angry. So this veri fateful day turned up wen P was alone walking on a corridor on her way in2 d tuition class wen N stop her. Wif a serious face (actually he looked silly), he asked “P, would you b my Girlfren?” so P replied wif a NOOOOOOOOOO!!!!!!! Juz dat she screamed it out instead of saying it out…. So P rejected him. D end of d story. Both P n N lived happily ever after. Oh no~~~~ it did not end juz like dat.
    A few months later, they met in a workshop coincidentally. P was like “ohhhh NO!” while I could c a wide smile from ear to ear from N. He smiled so widely he looked scary. this time, he kept on saying dat he did not like P but it was so obvious, d way he is trying 2 approach her wif every single attempt possible. His attempts r so freaky it freaked me off although im not his target (thank GOD!!) dat I feel sori 4 P. so, dat day he tried his veri best 2 talk 2 her n luckily P’s fren stood by her 2 ‘shoo’ him off (didn’t work AT ALL) while teasing P mercilessly. He also tried 2 impress her by trying 2 answer every single question…. stupidly (ironically, as I heard he is a nerd) n got d lecturers pissed. I could see a sigh of relief from P as wen d workshop is drawing close 2 itz ending.
    Oh things din seem 2 hav itz ending. A few months later, he came up 2 her tuition (she hav switched her schedule since then). It was holidays n we r having exra classes. He bombarded (more 2 threatened) my frens asking P’s hp num. my fren told him dey dun hav (a lie) 4 d sake of protecting P’s privacy. I believe dat P would throw her hp out of d window if ever N ring her up. N, looking disappointed went out of d class.. juz 2 WAIT 4 P OUTSIDE D TUITION CENTRE!! P’s fren told N dat P is not coming (another lie). P was informed tru her hp 2 circle d town a few more times wif her sis driving d car till N leaves. 10 mins later, N left n P’s fren hav 2 escort her upstairs juz incase P mite bump in2 N. what a drama… wen we r deep in2 our class, wen P n every1 else tot dat d drama is over, actually, it juz begun. D teacher was requested 2 go out 4 a moment 2 come back wif a ‘GREAT’ news. ‘someone’ bought FLOWERS 2 one of d students present dere. We all obviously know who…. n we all obviously laughed till we cant sit up straight. P did not collect d flowers… as 2 wart happened 2 d flower, it ended up in d trash can.
    Now, N is not as aggressive as usual as we are all in2 our coming up exams but den again, who knows wartz going 2 happen after d exams… I cant b sure. He mite wait 4 P outside d skool with a priest after exam 2… force her in2 marriage???? Or probably he will bring along a few kids n claim dose as their kids dey had a long time ago 0_0…..I dunno…. Im not planning 2 scare myself wif dose tots………..

  148. =( I WANT THAT PHONE!
    on with the story!
    When I was in F.2 I was classmates with a guy named N. Now N had fallen head over heels for my friend S. Everyday, he would sit by the window of our classroom and stare at S’s Classroom directly across ours. He would make loud annoucments to anyone unfortunate to be near him when S dropped her pencil or went to the toilet.
    Later, N’s condition worsened and he would stalk S even to her part time job! He also bought her handphone number for RM5 a digit from me =D. He then would proceed to sms’ing her though she rarely repiled. Finally, on her brithday he went up to her after school knelt down, presented her with a teddy bear, a pair of earrings and some mechanical pencils and started to sing “eye’s on me” (final fantasy Theme song). It was a painful sight. S ran away from him after the serenade and avioded him like plauge after that.
    Did N learn his lesson after the incident? NOOOOO!!! he became even more obsessed with S. He continued the stalking. His antics would increase it’s weirdness level by the hour. One day he went up to S and asked her “What do i have to do for you to accept me?” S promptly replied “go away! leave me alone! just go jump in the river la!” N did as told and thus jumped into our school pond. After that, N persisted but lost interest in S after she had her “brother’s” beat N up for stalking her.
    KENNY! PICK ME! puweaseeeeeeeeee!! if not i shall curse you till my mouth is dry! MUAHAHAHAHHAHAHAH- *cough*
    email – kerqing90@gmail.com

  149. hello kenny! i am a huuuuuuuge fan of ur blog and pls gimme the phone!! see, i’ve been using a nokia 3100 since form 2 and i am now form 5. surrounded by friends and classmates with the latest high-tech-expensive phones…. u noe how it feels! ='(
    my keypad’s skin all came off dy, the phone and the screen scratched… even the charger is not working properly dy!
    anywez, desperate addicts? i am not one but i do have some experiences… i duno lar they are counted as desperate addicts anot… but.. i’ll give it a try!
    i’ll start with form 1
    thre’s this boy who liked me since std5. form1,
    he cycled to my hse (his hse very far from my hse wan) to visit me and buy me a can of drink. i was still a lil innocent girl dat time, 13 yrs old ny, was super shocked abt dat dy. i was lucky enuff to spot him 1st in my mom’s car so i asked my mom not to go home 1st! he later ended up giving my friend who lives nearby the drink to pass to me later.
    form 2
    a guy made me angry and i demanded him to say “sorry” to me a million times.
    he did. by sending me an email with a million “Sorry…” haiyah, i demanded him to do dat using his voice lar!! instead he sent me an email pulak
    form 3
    another guy folded more around 500+ stars and put them in a big jar with a few hundred ringgit-ed necklace for my birthday.
    form 4
    another guy wrote me a real sweet poem, but i can’t put the link here… i’ll email u Kenny..
    and another guy made a video performing magic tricks for my birthday.
    form 5
    haha, i received some letters. hard to describe, i have to give u the another link personally again Kenny! check ur inbox for my email..
    no kenny, i din make them all up. all true… =)

  150. Once I had a crush with this girl, and let’s call her M. (I’ve written another tale, but that is later on. This is when I was wooing her in the beginning.)
    I tried several ways to get her attention, at least to have her call me. She never called me before. So i did 2 stunts to grab her attention.
    1. after a while knowing her, she invited me to her house for Raya celebration. After the visit, I took a picture wearing a cast on my hand. It was actually my junior’s cast.
    Then, I called her up, and told her that someone from her place had beaten me up. I gave her the picture as “proof” in my next letter. She never knew until now.
    2. That actually didn’t work, so I tried another one. I asked one of my form 1 junior (I was Form 5 then), who still hasn’t changed his voice, and called her up. He played as a girl, claiming to be my girlfriend, and asked M to stay away from me. Sure enough, she called me. she knew the truth later on, but had trouble believing that the voice was not a girl.
    in the end, we still contact each other, even though we had moved on. I think she may still have some feeling to me (:p)

  151. it happened when i was 14 years old. It was around midnight when my house phone rang. I was busy chatting in mirc with 2 of my friends. I rushed to pick up the call as i was afraid it would wake my mom up. She was fast asleep and there was noone else at home. I was wondering who could it be at such late hours. It was an unfamiliar man’s voice who spoke to me in english. The first question he asked was whether my dad is at home or not. Thinking that he is just another friend of my dad, I told him that my dad was outstation on business. Then he proceeded asking me where was he, how
    long will he be gone, where was my mom and etc. I stupidly answered all of his questions and then finally he hung up. Just as I was back in my room to continue chatting, I started feeling weird about the conversation and that the man
    had ask too much. The more I thought about it, the more freaked out i got. Then I told my friends about it and they agreed that the man sounded suspicious. I was so scared, tears formed and i was worried sick. I was thinking to myself
    “what if the man is actually a robber and he somehow got my house number and called to check out how many people is in
    my house now”, “what if the man is already outside my house getting ready to break in” and hundreds of other terrying possibilities. It got worse when I checked back the caller ID and realise that the number the man used was from a public telephone! My friends were worried and they tried consoling me for about an hour or so. The sort of
    accompanied me and we waited to see if anything happened. Thank god after a whole long hour, nothing unusual happened. no break in, no robbery, no call. I calmed down and told myself maybe it was really my dad’s friend. Surprisingly
    my friend, the one whom i chatted with, cycled over to my house to check if i’m alright. He told me there’s noone wondering around my house or anything suspicious and asked me to relax and not to worry. I was so embarrased but feel thankful
    for his help.
    The next morning i told my mom about the call and she kept quiet for a while. Finally she told me that it must be the desperate-addict-guy-friend of hers. she said that he must have pretended to
    look for my dad when I answered the call so that I won’t know the call is actually for my mom. Only then that she told me that this guy has been ringing her quite a lot lately when he somehow got her phone number from another friend. I felt so disgusted at that desperate addict as he too has a family. Til this day my mom is still friend with him but I think the call has stopped. However everytime I see him it reminds me of my naive-ness at that time, speak before thinking and the long hours of fear I endured as a result of it. I still dislike him a lot but after that incident,
    I’ve learned to be think before i speak and to be extra cautious when answering a stranger’s call. All thanx to the guy who was addicted to my mom. Eeeuuw!

  152. This guy, B, liked this friend of mine, S, way back in form 4 but S barely noticed him as she doesn’t really know him. So one fine day, a group of us were discussing about a sensitive issue (maybe not really sensitive la… since we actually discussed bout it). It was about masturbation :p… hehe… midway through the discussion, B came over to see what’s going on. Coincidentally, when he came over, S raised a question to the group “how does sperm look like?”
    I guess B saw that as a chance to get her to notice him more because the very next morning he brought a small container with white gooey substance in it. He looked for S before class started and passed it to her telling her what it was and added “now you not only know how it looks like, you can know how it feels and smell”. S was so disgusted she threw the container at him while the rest of us couldn’t stop laughing. Through out the remainder one and a half years of life in secondary school, he never dared come close to our group of friends anymore because every time he was seen by us, there will be a huge roar of laughther.

  153. i remember this incident where it happens my friend but this time its form5.. it started when we are doing our usuall truant activities which is mamak stall and my fren saw this really hot girl from another school…
    and so he approached the girl and introduce himself to her, and she, very lady like and introduce herself and shook hands with him. and my fren happily ask for her number and she gave him without much hesitation.
    after telling the girl that he is interested in her, he turn up at her school everyday wit a box of cookies(he made it himself) and gives it to her.he did that for a month and on this fine day which is her school’s carnival.. he drove his car and and tied a banner saying ” I love you so much Jeen, can i be ur bf?” and parked it infront of her school from 6am to 6pm wit roses in his hands and he sings “only you” whenever he sees her from outside.
    she then ignore him for a month or so until he did something extremely extreme, because jeen is a christian and she goes to church every sunday, my friend which is a free thinker, joined her church and she got touched and accepted him..

  154. Let me share with you my recent ‘frustration’…
    There is this chubby guy who was introduced by a friend to me few months ago during a dinner. He got my h/p number from my friend and started to sms me. The message started from “How’s your day?” type of greetings on weekly basis to “What are you busy doing today?” once in 3-4 days time. I just politely replied him once in a while.
    Then it becomes “Today I’m happy, I blah blah…”, “I drove around this evening… thinking of you…”, “Have you taken shower? I just did…” type of reporting every night. I didn’t reply him but he just kept doing it until I felt like I have been forced to play the role of his little girl friend who he reported to everyday. So I politely replied him not to sms me every night. Guess what, everytime I told him this, he just said “It’s ok, you can just delete them but I feel like telling you what I did everyday. It’s my little joy in a day…” and he continued with his daily reporting. It has become his addict.
    Days went by and every day I have to keep reminding myself to clear my mailbox before it bursts as the sms came almost every few minutes. So one fine day, I decided to end my misery by sms him: “Your joy just may not be mine too so please stop doing it!”
    Hahaha, I know I was mean. Come on man, it just doesn’t work that way with me.

  155. hey kenny, that phone is sick!! i need one of them (my cell broke,boohoo)
    anyways, this is my story
    Unlike all the other crazily-in-love peeps here,mine is different, why? because i was madly madly in love with this guy, for 6 years, every day, every hour, every minute,every second. Well, what’s so different your probably asking? well, unlike everyone else here, i didnt display my affection by acting physcotic, no matter what he did, no matter who he was going out with, i kept my love for him quiet and in my heart (now that is crazy, for 6years and not once did i spazz out)…but of course it didnt stop me from poisoning his pet parakeet when he went out with a Hiedi Klum lookalike (it was an accidnet lah!)

  156. “Is there a desperate addict in your life?”
    Well, during the last World Cup match. I went clubbing with a few of my girlfriends and it’s my first ever girls night out. So being a new drinker, I didn’t realize that I was drunk and my friends left me inside a room sleeping on a sofa. When I woke up, I saw 2 policemen doing an investigation between the rooms for drugs and stuff. I was so drunk until one of the policemen (undercover policeman from KL) brought me to a hotel (so-called friends). When I woke up, I couldn’t remember a thing.
    The next day, he brought me home and said that he will come in the evening for dinner. But he went missing. I cried of course and tried to forget him and take it as just a one night stand. He never called. After I calmed down, he called me again and said that he want to meet me again. I was so desperate and wanted to see him so much. I took a bus from Johor to Malacca 3 times just to meet him. But every time after I met him, he will go missing again. He makes me so desperate and don’t know what to do. I started to lock myself up in my own room, sometimes I cried over my stupidity for acting that way. I called him and SMSed him everyday. But he ignored me. Every time he promised to come to see me, he’ll lie and never appear (for many times).
    2 weeks ago, it was his birthday. I took a bus from Johor to Kuala Lumpur just to meet him. But he left KL to Malacca. So I stayed at my friend’s house instead. He called me again and again saying that I don’t love him anymore and trying to leave him. He called me from 11pm to 4am nonstop. He asked me to go to Malacca to see him if I still love him. Note that it was 4am, to prove to him that I am not playing, my friend sent me to Pudu Raya and I took a taxi to Malacca and paid RM200 for the cab.
    When I reached there, it was 6.30am and I called him again and again. But he never picked up the phone. I waited for 3 hours and cried. I was all alone in Malacca. I nearly bought a ticket back to Johor but he SMSed me at 9am. He picked me up and booked a cheap hotel room for me to rest. I was not satisfied with the room. After putting me in the room, he left and said that he got work to do, and it was 12pm.
    I waited in the room until 7pm and at last he called and said that he had to go to Johor to work tonight. And he sent me to the bus station again at 8pm asking me to take a bus home and he will come to my house to celebrate his birthday with me. And of course, he lied. He never appeared again. And I realized that I was so desperate and stupid trying to win his heart or something. Knowing that he have loads of girls outside there waiting for him to please him. But I was so desperate for him. I bet that that night he was in one of his girlfriends house.
    I know I sound stupid. Just now I went to the same restaurant that we went before, I wore the same clothes, ordered the same meal and sat at the same table (it’s not the first time I’ve done this). Every time when I see a Proton Waja, I’ll think of him. I can’t help it. Do I sound stupid, and desperate to you? And I am only 18 years old while he is 30. I am trying to stand up again. I realized that I made a big mistake. Thank you Kenny, I never tell anyone about this before. Your contest made me say all the stories out. I felt much better. I wish that those young girls outside there don’t be like me. That guy do not deserve my love. I’ve learnt that I should love myself before I try to love someone else.

  157. Oh! I remembered one whilst studying. How ironic 🙂
    Well, let’s share my story to everyone.
    It was two years ago, when I was.. 16? I was going out with a girl, and that was when I thought I was the luckiest guy on earth. On that same year, I learnt how to fold heart-shaped origamis using bus tickets, and because I hardly gave anything to her, I thought I should just try my best to impress her. I started hopping on buses, and even waited for buses without air-conditioning (the tickets were much better and the origami turns out nicer looking).
    Occasionally, I would be lazy and would try to get my friends to keep their tickets for me. I would then collect the tickets, and then fold them in classes. The origamis would then be kept in my bag. I remember at one time, the origamis got wet due to heavy rain. The damn origamis that I painstakingly folded for almost a month were spoilt!
    I had to repeat the process again, and after about two months of collecting and folding and meticulously checking every single one of the origamis, I was satisfied. I wrapped them together into a small box together with a cute souvenir I got in Malacca when I was there. It was two pigs carved with wood kissing and connected using some thread, and when you pull them apart, they will sort of vibrate and pull back together.
    There were approximately 200 origamis, which may seem to be quite a futile effort after three long months. Frankly, I would be impressed and touched with my own sincerity. It was, after all, my first time giving a gift to another person, more to say a girl!
    So, one day, I asked her out to Danga Bay. Usual stuff, walked, talked, ate, laughed, studied (exams). Before we left, I showed her the gift I got her. Guess what? She rejected it. I don’t know what the hell is wrong with my present. It’s not that I gave her a piece of my toe-nail or anything. It’s just some origamis which I painstakingly folded. I knew it wasn’t the pigs cause we gave each other ‘pig-gly’ names (yeah, so you know now). So, I did the extreme – I knelt down on that damn grass and begged her to accept my present, but to no avail. Gosh, can you imagine the traffic that drove past the area? It wasn’t that hard to notice someone kneeling down there. They must have thought I was proposing to her. Man, were they wrong. The embarrassment cannot be described. Desperate? Yeah, definitely.
    Sadly, after much useless persuasion, I somehow got her angry and she left home by herself while I sat at the edge of the river, thinking what I’ve done wrong. I still couldn’t figure out what wen’t wrong until today.
    Anyway, if you want to know, we did remain together until middle of last year 🙂 She was the nicest girl I’ve been with, but the rejection of the present that I gave her definitely brought lots of questions unanswered.
    FYI, my sister took the pigs and the box of origamis is still in my old cupboard. Any takers? LOL.
    *Great, I previewed the post and it just missing*
    Back to studying..

  158. i was,(am still) a desperate addict for attention and care. thats what makes me a hipocrite. i wil owes be the gal everybody expect to see…..even if its not my true self. as long as i got their attention…

  159. it still kinda irks me when i think about it,and i shiver slightly while i type this.
    lets call this guy a can?cause hor..he see this then..not very nice la right?
    haha.anyway!i used to go to a church in singapore (eh dont worry i live in malaysia now so theres no trouble delivering the phone..haha)and it was really small,so everyone knew each other.i received an sms from a one day,asking me to introduce myself.my boyfriend at that time then called me later that day complaining that while he was swimming(a was holding his locker key),a opened his locker and stole my number.later that year,as my friend’s idea of a joke,she invited him to sentosa with us,just to annoy me.he wrote my name in the sand and took pictures,posting it on his friendster(thank god he removed them already),which was nuts cause we hardly talked!2 days later,he called me and woke me up from my slumber,saying he was lonely.such an idiot,as if i care like that!i his girlfriend meh?then he started playing his stupid drums(very poorly,mind you),and thought it was a good idea to sing to me.what?of course i put the phone down on him.just roughly 1 month ago,i was visiting singapore.i found out that a was gathering information about me from a friend of mine.scared the hell out of me can.i went online and he started talking to me,and what freaked me out even more was that he said he remembered,exactly a year ago,was the first time we went out together(not together hor,in a group!!i still blame that friend to this very day).how he remember man!siao ginnah!his msn nick name freaks me out also.want to see? ”if i could fly, i would offer my wings to you and have our own freedom.she is my sanity,in this dark,dark world of darkness.”that doesnt even make sense,okay.Also,on my birthday,he bought a very expensive bracelet for me.scary or not,you tell me!he also knows im single now,and only you can help me,kenny!give me this hot phone and i’ll say that im too obsessed with it to bother about boys.or do you want me to be forever hounded by this maniac!?the choice is YOURS!!!
    (:

  160. Well, this happened way back.
    I have this good guy friend named Josh, rest assure that there was nothing going on between us. We are just like siblings. Josh and I enjoyed hanging out a lot, and one day I got to meet Paul, this guy from Josh’s class.
    Paul wasn’t exactly close to Josh but for reasons unknown, he tagged along when Josh was supposed to meet me. I didn’t mind since Paul was a rather amusing guy, and I had a fun time hanging out with him.
    After that day, he somehow got my hp number and would call me every night to chat for 4 hours. It got annoying, but due to basic courtesy I couldn’t bring myself to ask him to stop. I began switching off my hp at night and telling Paul that my parents forbid me to use my hp at night due to my poor results. He believed me but instead of calling me at night, he would call me at any time of the day to enquire me on what I was doing.
    It was a month before my birthday and Paul kept asking what I would want. I was curious to why he asked me so much earlier before my birthday and he told me he “needed time to prepare”. I didn’t know what I wanted, so I told him I wanted something personal that would remind him of me.
    A few days later, my crush asked me on a date. I was ecstatic! But the very next day, he canceled it. I refused to take no for an answer and asked him why. He told me he don’t date girls that are attached. Apparently, he thought I was with Paul! I laughed it off and told him it was a misunderstanding. Thank god he believed me.
    When I returned home, I found several missed calls by Josh, and a message to call him back. When I did, I received the most alarming news in my life. Apparently Josh and his group of friends paid a visit to Paul’s house. Paul forbid them to enter his room, but irregardless, they did when Paul was bathing.
    They found his room wall to be plastered with photos of me, his laptop had a wallpaper with my face. He even had a journal which he wrote what I did and reviews of our conversations. He would write things like “She’s so cute! I love her so much that I would go to the ends of the earth for her.” He even got my picture made into a bedsheet and pillow case. Imagine Josh’s horror when he saw my face on Paul’s pillow! And the worst of all, was that Paul got a shirt that had my face on it. And it looked as though as it had been worn a lot of times.
    I couldn’t help but avoid him. I would turn the other way if I saw him in school. Then on my birthday, I was held up in class by my friends who wanted to celebrate my birthday. He walked up to me and handed me this envelope and quickly walked away. I opened the envelope and found this little wrapped bag in it. Inside it was a CURLY strand of hair. I didn’t what where it came from and I didn’t want to know.
    My crush became my bf and I told him about Paul. He and Josh confronted Paul and told him to lay off me. Well, Paul thought I was interested in him when I was just being kind by listening to him. And the hair? Well my bf did find out for me but he told me that I was better off not knowing. And I heeded his advice.

  161. Whoops, *just went missing 🙂
    XIXILI: “That guy do not deserve my love. I’ve learnt that I should love myself before I try to love someone else.”
    Glad you learnt from it. You will stand up again. Everyone makes mistakes, not excluding you, Kenny and me. Let’s not repeat our mistakes and strive on to be a better person.
    And whilst I’m typing this, I should really get back to my study.
    Good luck people!

  162. it still kinda irks me when i think about it,and i shiver slightly while i type this.
    lets call this guy a can?cause hor..he see this then..not very nice la right?
    haha.anyway!i used to go to a church in singapore (eh dont worry i live in malaysia now so theres no trouble delivering the phone..haha)and it was really small,so everyone knew each other.i received an sms from a one day,asking me to introduce myself.my boyfriend at that time then called me later that day complaining that while he was swimming(a was holding his locker key),a opened his locker and stole my number.later that year,as my friend’s idea of a joke,she invited him to sentosa with us,just to annoy me.he wrote my name in the sand and took pictures,posting it on his friendster(thank god he removed them already),which was nuts cause we hardly talked!2 days later,he called me and woke me up from my slumber,saying he was lonely.such an idiot,as if i care like that!i his girlfriend meh?then he started playing his stupid drums(very poorly,mind you),and thought it was a good idea to sing to me.what?of course i put the phone down on him.just roughly 1 month ago,i was visiting singapore.i found out that a was gathering information about me from a friend of mine.scared the hell out of me can.i went online and he started talking to me,and what freaked me out even more was that he said he remembered,exactly a year ago,was the first time we went out together(not together hor,in a group!!i still blame that friend to this very day).how he remember man!siao ginnah!his msn nick name freaks me out also.want to see? ”if i could fly, i would offer my wings to you and have our own freedom.she is my sanity,in this dark,dark world of darkness.”that doesnt even make sense,okay.Also,on my birthday,he bought a very expensive bracelet for me.scary or not,you tell me!he also knows im single now,and only you can help me,kenny!give me this hot phone and i’ll say that im too obsessed with it to bother about boys.or do you want me to be forever hounded by this maniac!?the choice is YOURS!!!
    (:

  163. no love for aussie fans Kenny?
    once i was so desperate to see a band & get theur autographs that I camped outside the the place the were going to perform 3 days prior to the performance and when i still couldn’t get in i ate a tube of wasabi in exchange for it. i followed them back to their hotel later to get pics of them.

  164. hie kenny! i so wan the LG phone!!! i want it DESPERATELY! anyways… u wan story, i gif u story. real one!
    my fren, M, want to celebrate the gf’s birthday and show her how much he meant to her and how much he love her! he plan evrything already and want to do it on dat nite no matter wad! so my friends and i went to buy present for her and want to supprise her at sarawak club. we called her to check what time is she going bak home. and den we go buy chocolate at the airport! on the way to sarawak club, she called and say she is almost home liao! we were all so frustrated and gave up! but M did not give up and chase all the way to her house eventhough the petrol tank is almost empty.(her house is at 4th mile and we were almost at sarawak club) the gf did not think dat he would go to her house to look for her. or so desperate to celebrate her birthday with her.
    wen we reach her house, we parked outside and M called the gf’s handphone.
    M:hello! u home now? is ur dad and mom home? (the parents dn really approve of their relationship)
    GF:ya. im home but mom not home. just my dad! why?
    M: im outside ur house now. can i go in or can u kom out?
    GF: HARH!!! u outside now?! i think it should be ok for u to kom in la!
    then they hang up! he took the chocolate and the poem he wrote for her. he plan to read it before kissing her on the lips! and then he enter the house while we wait outside.
    after waiting quite some time, we wondered why not yet done wan! so we go to the window there and peek and see what is happening! haha! we saw them kissing and hugging for quite long! so we continue watching and den we saw the dad walk out halfway from the kitchen and quickly walk back into the kitchen! and we were all “OMG!!! dat is d dad!! OMG!!!” and we hurried back to the car and wait. after a certain time,M came out and we got into the car and drove away!
    we told him we saw him and d gf kissing and was watching the whole time. and he was blushing! and wen we told him that we saw the dad came out of the kitchen and saw them kissing, he didnt believe until we convince him. and we all laughed and until now we still made fun of it and he is still embaressed about it!

  165. I had a crush on this girl 2 years back. And I planned to confess on her birthday itself.
    What I did:
    I gathered 13 friends of mine, headed to the Bandar Utama park at 8pm which I have to add, is infested with mosquitos, and we used about 700 Ikea round candles to place on the entire park in an “I *heart* YOU” shape. The three words itself was the size of a standard basketball court.
    We took about 2 hours to get it done, and we started lighting them up one by one. Residents were out of their houses to stare, security guards were interoggating us, and people definitely thought we were insane.
    When we were almost done, I left my friends there to help me finish the last few whilst I went and pick HER up. As we were approaching the park, I gave one of my friend a miss call as a signal to get the hell out, as planned earlier.
    The best part was, she doesn’t even know where I was bringing her, because I got her blindfolded. So when we reached the park, I held her hands and led her over the drain, and she started saying “why is it so warm, where am I?”. As she could hear the residents mummuring, it worried her more.
    Before I opened her blindfold, I gave her a hug infront of like 100 people and told her that I love her. And then I took off the blindfold.
    Needless to say, she broke down in tears. It was a marvellous sight, 700 lit candles on a park in 3 simple words. The people there cheered and I could feel my leg trembling as it was kinda awkward. It was 12am and everyone came out to applause the new couple.
    In the center of the heart shape, I left a huge box there, which contained everything she wanted but never had the chance to buy it. CDs, wallets, handbags… everything. Costed more than a thousand on the presents itself.
    Why do I say this is desperate? Because it was planned for 2 weeks, I spent wads of cash on the candles, the presents, and I actually had the guts to light up 700 candles in a residential area, when I don’t even live there!
    Needless to say, I got into trouble with the security after that, but oh well, that’s not the point =)

  166. Kenny, your question: Is there a desperate addict in your life?
    My TRUE answer: So far no. There isn’t any.
    Hope you like this answer and give me that LG phone.

  167. My desperation sums up all to the characters used above and their stories and not to mention, the stories that would be posted soon below me…Is that good enough? 🙂

  168. OMFG that phone is SO *bleeping* GORGEOUS! i swear im having orgasmic like feelings just looking at it!
    trying hard to think of a story now.
    *think think*
    GAH! the phone is too pretty, it’s ruining concentration.
    i would have rather done the streaking -__-
    will be back later. 😀

  169. Well, this happen 2 years ago in one of the University in Singapore.
    He he. There is a guy … Ha ha…He likes a girl so much that one day, he asked his lecturer to help him to tell the girl to ‘hold his hand’.
    During break time in the lecture, the lecturer told the student not to leave the hall first as there is a shy guy who wish to tell a girl that he loved her. He he…den, the lecturer showed the power point slide made by the guy in the lecture theater, a cartoon, and a sentences : Take my hand…
    Afetr that, the guy, came out, can pass flowers to the girl, telling her that he love her in the middle of the lecture hall. He he he… Now this is even posted in you tube.

  170. I have a friend who is a desperate and crazy addict not to love a person but playing games, from pc games, psp games, xbox games and even ninetendo ds games. He can buy 4 psp, 2 xbox, 3 nintendo ds and 3 desktop just to play his games. Cos he afraid that one of the gadget will spoil one day, so he bought extra and for collection purpose. Lately, he even buy a LCD tv just to play his xbox games. And most of the games in the market will buy it once it is out and not only one copy that he bought, he will bought 2 copies for each games..Just for the sake of collection. His love for movie and soundtrack make his one whole room full with the original dvd. I dunno is this consider a desperate addict but to me is it a crazy addict that i ever seen in my life.

  171. There was once I played Ragnarok…( the characters are able to marry one another)…I got to know a guy from there and started chatting…A week later, he asked me to marry him in the game and I said okay since it was just only a game..We exchanged msn and phone number not long after that…And then, a few days later he got to know my friendster and he grabbed my photo and put into HIS friendster that says : ”On the left is my girlfriend ^^.”
    I never knew this until my cousin told me about it..And so I thought it was just a joke..and just ignore it..
    So anyway, I was ‘married’ to this guy and we decide to meet up in some place. After awhile, he started holding my hands and acted like we are real life ‘husband’ and ‘wife’…HE called me ‘lou po’ (wife) and I was in a state of shock! Then he said ‘I don’t care…I got to marry you no matter what happens..'(in a serious voice) What the hell was he thinking?? For all I know I was just his ‘wife’ in game…I never tend to futher my relationship with him anyway.. And the he started to hug me and even wanted to kiss me in the car!! It was just the first time we met each other and he was already acting like that…I tried to push him but he keeps coming nearer and nearer to my face…Once again, I was traumatized and don’t know what to do! How could he just do like that without knowing me in real life? Come on! It’s just a game! I didn’t give any hints that I liked him or whatsoever..I just treat him as a friend…So after that, I rarely talk to him and hope he ‘patah hati’ (despaired).. And then comes the smses he smsed to me..If I don’t reply him..He’ll message me like 10 times..saying ‘where are u?’ ‘are u ok?’ ‘don’t scare HUBBY..’ HUBBY!! My god. To make things worst…He told his parents that I’m her girlfriend already..what the hell…Oh well, So I started to give hints that we are not couples in real life..And shhh…I hope he doesn’t reads this blog..Lol..
    this story is copyright-ed ah…And it’s all based on a true story…

  172. Hi Kenny,
    Firstly,Thanks for being so generous by offering the gorgeous LG white mobile!I luvvvee White!Hope to win this mobile..hehe!
    As for your question, this fren of mine-a girl. I remember when she wanted to get this guy to be her bf,she purposely learned to speak a new dialect that the guy speaks often and she learnt it fluently in 1month!furthermore, she also went to learnt ballroom dancing with the guy, typically stalking him and getting involved in everything he does, she also calls him like almost every hour of the day finding some lame excuse to hear his voice.To cut the story short, she didnt wait for the guy to ask her the question to get together,instead she design this crossword and ask the guy to play along giving some hints of wad the word might be and so the guy played along and realised tat the whole puzzle had a meaning to it. Eventually they got together..I guessed he found her pretty desperate yet adorably smart and witty!!

  173. I used to be close with X for a year. We were inseparable.
    But when classes ended that year, I saw a new person in X. X never called and never smsed anymore. X totally changed. And I totally miss X.
    X is still different to me but no matter how different X is I will still want to be with X forever.
    Check my page out to see how desperate I am.
    I am willing to give up anything on this world for X, including my life and my soul.

  174. I met this guy, A (can’t remember his name) quite some time back as I was in a college helping out with new students. Was already working but sometimes i do go back to colleges to give new people a hand. A seemed like quite a nice guy and came from a well to do family. We met just once and went out and had drinks with some of my friends. Not long after that i received a call from A saying that he DESPERATELY and URGENTLY needed my help. He sounded very in need and I went to see him.
    A begged me to take him from Subang Jaya to Cheras for reasons I was not enlightened about yet. I decided to chauffeur him since it was the next best thing to actually lending him my car (Can you imagine lending your car to someone you’ve only met once?!). I took along a good friend of mine for the journey and he took one of his friends along too.
    I should have suspected something was amiss when I went to pick him up. He was holding a damn huge bouquet of flowers waiting with his friend. I don’t know how many flowers there were, but we had a big problem trying to get it in my Merc S320. Okay okay..it was a Proton Wira, but still it was damn hard to get it in ok?
    Our journey was an awkward one. My friend and I didn’t really know what was going to happen that night. We only got a whiff of ‘someone not doing too well’ and judging by the bouquet of flowers, we embraced for the worst. Probably someone not too far from meeting their maker or something we surmised…
    After a half hour’s drive we arrived and hunted for the location among the many rows of houses. Abruptly, A asked us to stop by the side of the road. The house was not too far off he said. His friend got down with the bouquet of flowers and started walking to the house and rang the doorbell. A sat in the car.
    The house was a bit far off, but we could roughly make out what was going on. A girl answered the door and A’s friend handed over the bouquet. I remembered she was attired in black. Yet, she seemed so happy and cheerful. In the end, A’s friend beckoned him to come over and he did. They spent some time conversing and then returned to the car.
    We stopped by a restaurant for some food before heading back. It was at this time that I decided to confront him as to the purpose of the trip…
    Me: So the flowers for who??
    A: For the girl jus now lo…i happened to like her la.
    Me: (???) What happened to her?
    A: Well, her health not doing so well la.
    Me: Really? WHat’s wrong with her?
    A: SHe got sore throat.
    MA CHAO HAI!KNNCB!
    I never kept in touch with him after that for obvious reasons. SO MUCH FLOWERS COZ THE GIRL YOU LIKE HAD SORE THROAT? I really can’t imagine what he will do if she has high fever or bad cough or God forbid, dengue. Buy her double storey bungalow ah?? Chee sin la…

  175. It all happened roughly two years ago in college, where I met this guy at a friend’s party. From the beginning he knew I had a long-distance bf, and we didn’t talk much at all at the party except for lots of crazy Karaoke.
    Later that week, there he was at the study hall that I routinely bury myself after my classes. For some reason, his ecstatic face kinda freaked me out. Plus, he started showing me his research, his websites, his writings, and his personal photos!! Reminder: This is the second time I’ve seen him ever! I didn’t even know his full name! But he seemed nice and friendly, and my friend always had wonderful things to say about him. A girl never has enough shoes or friends, right?? So we happened to “run into” each other almost everywhere. I mean, how could this possibly happen? Our campus is huge with at least 100 main buildings. Sometimes, he would pretend he didn’t see me and later on emailed me to seriously apologize for his rude behavior.
    While all of this was going on, since the second time he met me, he started these daily series of 5 to 10 paragraph e-mails explaining his future goals, his accomplishments, and his character with REFERENCES. Did I have a “Now Hiring Stalker” sign written on my face??
    One day, after this 2-months friendship. He told me that he’s in love with someone, and it was someone I knew very well. I thought, Goodie!! Finally, this guys was getting off my back!! Unfortunately, after that, his friendliness turned into full romance-attack! I don’t remember how he got my number, but he started calling me, leaving me creepy messages about how to prepare a balanced meal, and the forecast for the day. He’d send umbrella reminders really early in the morning. Once, he saw that I had forgotten my umbrella, he ran for 10 minutes to fetch me his from home.
    But I never once gave him the invitation to chase after me. I talked about my bf all the time, how much he meant to me, etc. One night, he was in pretty bad shape when he called. He blurted out how he never had any luck with girls. They always leave him, hurt him, use him. He even spent $100 at a payphone calling his ex the night the girl broke up with him.
    Everything was completely unexpected; and this creepy side of him never came out among our circle. I mean, it is not like he didn’t have friends; he’s one of the most popular guys in our group. And he’s always super busy – fulltime school, fulltime job, part-time volunteer and part-time stalker. Where in the world did he manage to find time to update his webpage with photos of me?
    My worst nightmare happened the day he confessed his love for me. He listed all the things he had done to show how much he loved me.
    (1) He had translated my entire website to Chinese, including the 50 blog entries. He sent them to his parents in Taiwan, so that his parents could evaluate me as a possible suitor for their son!!
    (2) He had taped on his wall all the poems I’ve written (which most were simply meaningless random thoughts). He said to understand my heart; he had to first understand my world through my poetry.
    (3) He confessed that the first time he saw me was not at the friend’s party, but 4 months before our official meeting. He recited to me the date, the time, location, THE WEATHER!, what I was wearing, and the people I talked to. Geez!! he said, all these things were carved in his brain because it was love at first sight. Help me!
    At the end, of course, I rejected him. I was reluctant to break the friendship because we had so much in common, and aside from his addictive behavior, deep down, he’s a kind, caring human being – but for his own good and mine, I stopped talking to him after that. I still remember the last thing he said on the phone, as in a real dramatic Korean-style love movie – “I hope you’re not crying now… But let me ask you this… What if you have met me first, would you… Do you think we would be together? Wait… don’t answer, I don’t want to know.”
    Even now, he’d call once in a while to report the forecast just like the times when he would research and map out the road conditions and weather precautions for my bf’s trip to see me.

  176. I was the desperate addict. I was in uni and I noticed this guy playing the guitar so well during a break in the English Fest. We’ll call him M.
    After a lot of research, I learnt that M was in my Math class (I never noticed him before because he’d always come late and sit at the back) and that he rode a bicycle to campus (it was only a kilometer away from our hostel). He was always with this other girl (L) and he would cycle around campus with her. Once, I was in a van sapu waiting to go back to the hostel and I heard these other girls commenting on M and L cycling together, just like in Sembilu. Man, I was SO jealous!
    So I borrowed my mother’s mountain bike from home (I am a local and home was 25 minutes away) and started cycling. I made friends with L and soon enough, I was joining them cycling to the library (they were always at the library with their coursemates, studying or doing their assignments).
    I got his schedule and made sure I was in the vicinity. I would get up at 6am every day to make it to campus at 8am just so I could see him cycling to class. And I wouldn’t even have classes until lunchtime! Every day for a year, I would get up at 6am, cycle to campus at 8am (have breakfast at the cafeteria and watch him cycling to class. I would then cycle around campus, going to the library at 9am before my own classes and afterwards, be at the library again after 4:30pm because I knew he’d be there with his friends. My friends and lecturers kept seeing me and the library and started calling me a ‘nerd’, but they didn’t know the main reason I was there.
    I even managed to join their table during their study sessions (we were from different courses) and I would cycle back with him after the library closed at 12:30am. Just me and him. L had moved out of the hostel and was riding a motorbike now. And people had started calling me his twin instead of her (because anywhere he was, I was sure to be close by). So my day would start at 6am and end at 1am. I had five hours of sleep every day except the weekends for a whole year!
    I’ve braved rainstorms (even when I was sick) to cycle with him. I had dinners with him and his coursemates. I’ve even waited at the hostel stairs when I knew he was going to be cycling back from the library (this was before I got my mother’s bike). And in the beginning (before I infiltrated his group), I would wail from my hostelroom window, “Where are you, M?” until one of my roomies actually gave me advice about being obsessive (and I was much older than she was!).
    I bought a cheap ‘digital’ camera that had no zoom or preview screen for RM220 just so I could take photos of him during the ‘Battle of the Bands’ held on campus. But I was too self-conscious to stand in front of the stage to take shots of him. In the end, I just took shots from where I was sitting…and ended up with stamp-sized images of him.
    Another time, his course club organized a sand at competition. I wanted so much to enter, but I did not have three friends from my own course who were interested in joining. Part of the rules were that there needed to be at least three members in a team. He suggested I replace him in his team and I declined, because I didn’t know them and it would be awkward. In the end, it was just the two of us in a team and we cycled to the beach (our campus is by the beach) to discuss ideas. I had so much fun!
    Oh yes, I spent so much time with him, there were rumours circulating around the staff that he was engaged to a Chinese girl (I’m mixed but I do look more Chinese) and that this Chinese girl was prepared to convert just so she could be with him.
    And you know what’s the funniest thing? I am nine years his senior and not a Muslim! There could never be anything more than friendship.
    I still know his i/c number too. He still keeps in touch with me.

  177. Back in college, one of my good friend (also a friend I have acutally grown up with) was crazy about this guy A. She knew him, in fact I’m sure he knew she liked him. Anyways, she wanted to get closer to him, wanted to know everything. I can’t remember how she found out where he lives, and i live down the street from him, on the same road. So she told him that she has a cousin living there, so she would always hang out at my place, just to be closer to him. Hoping that he’ll notice her more.
    And to try to pry more about him, she created this story that she had a best friend living in canada now. She created an email account with her imaginary friend’s name J and started emailing him, telling him that her best friend had told her about him, etc.
    And that was going well, (in a way) she felt she got closer to him. Although it’s all lies. She’s the same person as the imaginary friend and she can never admit the truth.
    Until one day, for whatever reason, she stole his school bag in college. I can’t even remember what she’s thinking or what she was looking for, all I know she was at the stage of being obsessed with him. And anyways, he suspected it was her, and he threatened to call the cops on her actually and had already told his dad that some girl had stolen his bag. She called me, asking for help. I called him, annoymously, and said it was a prank, and that I will return his bag. He asked me why, who am i, but i didn’t say, well it woulnd’t matter anyway.
    And basically that’s the story..after that, she toned down..guess she got scared..

  178. got rejected again and again for a date… i couldn’t help it but to call her parents and ask for their blessing… i told them she was 3 months pregnant and we need to talk… … i was on the public phone pretending to be her bf.
    you know what, her bf went to her house after i hang up the phone and rumours had it that her father almost cut off his little bird.
    desperate? yes! Impress? No.

  179. Well well…With all the competition out there, I just can hope my little true story can grasp your attention. My brother once had a stalker. When he was in uni, staying in the hostel. This girl would follow him everyday when he was walking back from class with his group of friends, she would be there walking a few feet away..and giggling silently to herself. As my brother was about to reach his block, she would walk fast, overtake him and say a shy “HI!”. She did that everyday…after and before his everyclass. I till today do not know how she knew my brother’s class schedule. And even when my brother hooked up with his gf, she was there…still walking behind the couple…giggle and walking past with a shy “hi!”.

  180. Well 2 years back while I was studying college in KL, my good friend, Boon came down to Kuala Lumpur to hang out. We are from Ipoh btw.
    So we both and another friend, Chris (who drives) meet up in food court for dinner. Suddenly out of the blue, Boon said ‘he needs to meet up with someone’. Usually when he says this, I know surely
    he is going to meet up with some chick.
    And really he had plans to meet up with one. Unfortunately the chick was at another food court which has the same name. Hehe maybe you guys know if you are familiar with PJ & Sunway. And after the chick knew she was at the wrong place, she came to PJ after 15mins.
    Okay, me and chris didn’t suspect anything. After meeting with the girl who is quite hot, we got to know this Boon got to know her from MIRC (some chatroom). Bloody fella, came all the way from Ipoh just to meet with some chick. How desperate!
    So we 3 guys and the chick had drinks and after that, we discussed about what to do next. If not mistaken it was a Sunday night, so clubbing is out of the question plus we were quite broke at that time. And the girl didnt have transport back. So Chris is okay sending her home.
    We 3 guys went into the car and the chick also. So I was seating in the front passenger seat, Chris driving and Boon sitting behind. The girl told us she was staying in Damansara something, couldn’t really remember. Chris seems to know the place, so okay lor.
    After reaching near her place, we noticed she was like sleepingin the car!!! we tried to wake her up but with no success. Boon shouted at her! No response. We thought she was DEAD or something. Hrrm then I was brave to just use my hand to rub her thighs and also no response. -.-” Boon said I was hamsap. LOL. Then I put my finger at her nose there , can feel she is breathing woh.
    Chris meanwhile stopped the car and opened her door. He threatened to slap her till she wakes up. Also no response. We also tried putting some water on her face. Still cant wake up. Hrrrm.
    Suddenly I saw a white car which looks like police car! Wahh damn scared, you know la..after say we 3 guys want to gang rape her or wat. We 3 damn innocentla that time. Also damn scared, how can this girl like no response one.
    In the end she also wake up la….then direct us to her house. Before she left the car, she said ‘ you guys stupid or wat????? She gave us that look also. We 3 guys damn blur d……..apparently I guess she wants sex gua….haihz! But with 3 guys at the same time ar? Crazy siao meh. And she was only like 15 that time. Sad sad fact.
    Kinda weird story. LOL.

  181. There’s an old couple which i knows live in the same block of flat with me…They have be known as the “GAN FU YAM FU” couple ->means CURANG COUPLE la… because that old man (60 something) which is so desperate fall in love with this fat old lady(also 60 something)that this old guy could just divorce with her own wife and leave his own children to his former wife… He just wants to get along and pak-tor with this fat lady!!! They every morning go pasar pagi yam cha and could be driving around just like what teenagers do to pak-tor inside their car… OMG! Are they too desperate to fall in love somewhere before the end of their lifes? Weird…

  182. I have one.. and it freaks me out up till today.. actually it happened recently, earlier this year since I came back home from Melbourne. This friend of mine which i knew during high school added me in friendster and from then on, he has been stalking me online and all over the place sending me love messages in my MSN, emails and testimonials and even stole a picture from my friendster, removed my boyfriend’s pic and replaced it with his.
    I only got to know that he got into an accident and damaged his head. He was in coma for a few months until he regained back consciousness but not his sanity.
    Usually my pc is turned on 24/7, and when I wake up the next morning, I will get SUPER LONG MSN messages from this guy. He will write all kinds of nonscence, and telling me that he has loved me ever since the first time he laid eyes on me, and will always love me till the end of time. Told me to break up with my boyfriend and all kinds of nonscence, even mentioned something about laying eggs. I have lots of WEIRD messages from him.
    When he mentioned Bubba in the email, he meant my boyfriend who is big in size and is a srilankan+chinese. Hahaha..
    ————————————————-From: L*T* R* Hoong [mailto:r*h*@hotmail.com]
    Sent: Tuesday, February 07, 2006 3:48 AM
    To: c*c*@yahoo.com
    Subject:
    Tau Cui dun make you FaT,…..BuBBa-lah yang make U fat,his kind of FaTcacing hav wings on it and if you stand near to that DaRK tong-drum,his FAT-flies will masuk your body then infest inside your CHeRRibicaL-body,..HAPPy NeW YeaR-where are you ya?How are you?
    Aiks,..got soreThroatla,…hav to go sleep early now,….patutlar…everyday sleep in the earLy-morninz,Wat kinda penyakit berjangkit also can pass thru me,….my bodys a-frailin and muh soul got lost down arnDarh tho myHope for you is notLa.
    Hav you forgotten the promise Ive made to you when you’re planning to go down there to further your studies?
    Hope that Bubba is a real BooBoo that is made to try me out on my Faith in you,………….aiyarh,…I yem velie-velie LoyerL wannn,…………..once I said I truly loves you,its gonna stay that way to the end of life.
    LOVE,…..(& its gonna stay that way)
    R*H*
    Can I add this in? Here’s my bf’s reply to him.. ahahhahahaha..
    Yo Jackass,
    Go get yourself a mental doctor, if i find you disturbing my girlfriend again, i am gonna come there and give you a taste of my fist.
    Go get help, get someone to pray for you… i think you are demon possesed.
    I am giving you one final warning to stay away from C*… you are a freak and you will marry a freak one day too… And you can sleep in a dark tong drum for the rest of your life…
    I WILL FEED YOU THE FAT CACING WITH WINGS… Dude get a mirror… You are one freaking ugly piece of shit…
    Get a life, get a job and most important. GET HELP
    The BOOBA who is gonna kick your teeth in.
    HAhahahhahahaha…
    There is a whole lot more freaky messages from him and here’s a few testimonials he sent in friendster which i refuse to accept, but im keeping it since it amuses me so much! hahahaha…
    ———————————————–
    You have 5 testimonials to approve or reject L* T* Posted 26/7/2006
    Its quite easy to let go,
    then the song begins again,
    and even if the words are not so tender,
    I know she’ll always remember-
    the way it used to be.
    Delete | Approve
    ————————————————-
    L* T* Posted 26/7/2006
    DokumenPerlelongan:-KZ 098 6574 118B
    =============================
    Pihak pemberlelong: Lennon Teoh
    ——————-
    ingin,melelongkan dirinya-untuk berutuskannya dengan pihak ambik lelong : C* C*
    —————-
    *Jikalau kebenaran pengambilan pemberlelong-oleh pengambik lelong tu diterima,Testi ini akan muncul di profile Friendster pengambik lelong.
    (So tempted to accept this piece and see how he reacts to it! Hahahhaa..)
    Hakim lelong,
    Dr.Eam Lover anak Munu sami la ni
    Delete | Approve
    ————————————————-L* T* Posted 23/7/2006
    Dear ‘AngKong-NgaKia’,
    Am I stiLL your AngKonG? your NgaKia’ (Nga = terNga-Nga/curious) -or your “AngKong + NgahKia” (Ngah=’abang’-Ngah/entah mau jadi ‘anak’-saya)
    Delete | Approve
    ————————————————-
    L* T* Posted 18/7/2006
    ……………………………………………”miew-miew!!!!,…………….mew-mew-mewwww,…………….”
    Delete | Approve
    ————————————————-
    L* T* Posted 1/7/2006
    SHEs a DOLL…………my LIVING DOLL?
    WHEN? * Inside ME since our Last CaLL
    WHY? * Coz Shes Got my ToLL
    HoW? * ToGoHav ourVERY ownSOUL!
    Why? * sowThatWeCanMake “OurVeryOwnWORLD”together in this neverending LOVE story.
    Delete | Approve
    ————————————————-
    That is ONE WEIRD FELLA i am telling you! YUCKS! Hahahhahahahhahhaa… Thank God i didnt meet up with him thinking that he’s still normal. I wonder what will happen.
    This is the picture he edited! Super bad photoshop skills but nvm. He stole a pic i took with my bf @ his friend’s wedding from my friendster, and replaced his face with my bf’s.
    Initially, I didn’t want to put the link in cause I wanted to respect his privacy, but my friend said “you care so much for what?” ahhahaha.. true also. So, here goes!
    http://img.photobucket.com/albums/v509/chewelzz/WEIRDO.jpg

  183. Well i have this friend L who is a major skank. He would flirt with every girl he came across.
    Just to teach him a lesson i brought a really hot girlfriend of mine, C out one day just to temp him. Mind you this really hot girlfriend of mine not straight. She goes for girls. She agreed to play along and as the night came to an end, C got up went to the next table, grab another girl kissed her and left.
    The look on L’s face was priceless. But he still didn’t learn his lesson. A few weeks after that we went to a bar. It was actually a gay bar and he didn’t know about it. He went on his usual routine scanning around for a victim. He didn’t have to search very far. He found one. He was chatting her up and next thing we know L has disappeared. She was pretty petite and hot by the way. About half an hour after we noticed his disappearance, he came running at my friends and I saying we have got to leave now.
    By the look of his face we got worried and we just ran out of that place. When we were safe in the car, I finally turned to ask him what is going on. Turns out that the stacy, the retty girl he chatted up was a majorly hot cross dresser.
    He only found out as they were moving from second base to third base in the toilet. After that incedent, he swore never to skank ever again… even if it means that he’ll end up as a priest.
    I was not suppose to ever bring this up again but i really couldn’t help it. It is super funny. Every thing about this is true. It just happen about 2 months back.
    So do i get the LG White Chocolate?? Please???

  184. On the morning of 17th November i am going to suprise Kenny outside his house while he starts his daily routine. Procedure will begin as he backs his car out of the porch in front of the main gate but i certainly do hope that the driver’s side window is down to facilitate me in getting my message across.
    Before that, I’ll have some cardbox drawn and cut to the shape of a man displayed 500 meters away jikarau my scare fail i still can have my paper made brothers to heighten my scare and convience him that i am not alone.
    Of course i need some cover up to protect my true identity. There is still a little bit of time hence i will mingle around with all those programmers from India to perfect my English with some accent, most likely the scent comes as a bundled package. I will also go shopping for a hood which seems to be the in-thing for this purpose around this century.
    All these preparations just to snatch a white chocolate and i certainly hope it taste good. On a second thought, why didn’t Kenny have it for himself? Perhaps white isn’t his colour since he is always in dark gears.

  185. Britney Spears is so desperate to sell Kevin Federline’s album she’s asking her fans to help out. She’s sponsoring a contest and the fan who helps sell the most copies of Kevin Federline’s album Playing With Fire gets to party with her and K-Fed on Halloween during the CD release party. She certainly qualitfies as a desperate addict!

  186. this was just a few years ago.
    I had a Friend who was madly in love with this girl in school but didn’t have the guts to tell her about it. He did everything he could to hint to her about his feelings. He stayed till late at night over the phone helping her with work, he even stayed past 2am the night before his bio exam to help her go through the biology work. She never noticed, however. The most desperate thing i remember him doing was that he brought 5 to 6 packs of tissue everyday. This was because this girl he liked used to have colds, runny nose all the time. She would run out of tissue, and just so that she wouls speak to him more and that he could do something more for her he brought packs and packs of tissue in his bag- pretty weird for a guy since guys usually don’t carry tissues around.

  187. I proposed to her. Now that I’m older (and somewhat wiser), I can see that proposing marriage is THE true desperate act of someone in love.
    Pick me Kenny!

  188. well, this is a story of how i got my girlfriend… some people will think that what i did was wrong… but i think it was just to show her that im her soul mate… well, when i first met her, we were in college… she was so attractive.. so stunning… but i didnt had to balls to say hi to her… then one fine day, she came up to me and started talking to me… i was so nervous..!! then after a few days passed, she started talking about her bf and all.. that just shattered all my hopes… but i wasnt going to give up easily… so i became good friends with her… then after a few months, we became really close and her bf started to give me warnings and all.. then one day, i sent her an SMS “i miss u darling”… then suddenly after a few minutes, she called me and was crying because her bf read that SMS and left her stranded in a shopping mall… so then i felt really bad and all.. then the next day i met her and she said that her bf doesnt want her to meet me anymore… so i told that its her decision if she doesnt want to see me anymore, im just sorry for everything… then we didnt talk to each other for a few weeks… but then, suddenly somehow we started talking again… (i knew she love me but was just caught in the wrong place and the wrong time)… then we again started to become close friends.. then one day i asked her to come with me to Zouk to celebrate one of my friends birthday… she agreed at first… then on the day of the party, in the morning she SMS-ed me saying that she cannot make it… then i called her and asked her why and she said that her bf dont let her to go.. so i said “fine”.. then after a few hours, she calls me back saying that she is coming… i got excited!! then when i met her and all at Zouk, her brother told me that she broke off with her bf bcse she couldnt take it anymore… and that just got me so damn excited!!!
    and after a shots of Johnnie Walker i lost my patients… i just confessed to her and she told me to kiss her… so i did… and so many things happened… but when we reached home (she stayed over at my place), she told me that our relationship cannot go any further… i was devastated! heart broken!!! =( then in the morning she sent me an SMS saying “IT WAS A MISTAKE”.. and i was nearly about to kill myself… then i got angry with her and after that when i met her in college i started becoming rude to her… and although i felt bad… but i felt she took me for an advantage… then 6 months passed on, she sent me an email, asking how am i and all… then from that email we started talking like normal… then she told me that she has finally moved on and she has a new bf and his the best ever guy on earth and all… i was still devastated… then as we became friends again, she started to trust me again… she started to tell me about her bf problems and all… and sometimes she just feels like she is being left out and all… from the time she trusted me, i wrote her love letters everyday with the same concept of asking her to open her eyes and see the bigger picture… then one fine day, we were walking at Bukit Bintang and i was flirting with her and she was laughing laughing and all, one of her bf’s friend saw and scolded her… i felt like DEJA-VU….!!! i was so devastated and some part of me told me to just stay away from now onwards… so that is what i did… then the next day she called me asking me to pass her back her slippers that she left in my house… so then i agreed to see her alone at the LRT station… then while i was waiting for her at the LRT station… suddenly i saw she holding her bf’s hand and walking towards me… and that was really a slap towards my face… then she took the slippers and then walked back towards the LRT station… i felt i wanted to just DIE at that time… then the next day she SMS-ed me saying that she realized the bigger picture.. then i told her its up to her if she believes that that is the bigger picture… then after about 6 hours of non-stop SMS, she finally got fed up of me not understanding what she was trying to say, she told me that she has broke off with her bf and wants to be with me… and i was so excited…!! couldnt sleep… and after 2 months from that incident, i proposed to her while we were in our sleeping outfit at SanFransico Coffee… and she was so cute..!! and since then we have always exchanged love letters/notes/poems/kisses/hugs and everything else…. its only been about 2months since i proposed to her to be my GF but it feels like she has been with me throughout my whole life… througt my bad times and good times… and i LOVE YOU ANGELA..!! for eternity… muacks!!!

  189. This happened long time ago. I signed up for classes at this tuition centre with a group of friends (read: tuition centre = lots of students from different schools, cramp in a small room, think: chickens in the cage, on their way to get slaughtered).
    Anyway, this guy, fancy(ied) me. And I don’t fancy him. And I think he is a psycho. I’ll tell you why:
    1.He will sit behind me in every single freaking class so that he could “observe” me (mind you I couldn’t sit at the last row because 1. I was too short, 2. I was kia su);
    2.He will place a flower on my table before class (despite me throwing those damn flowers in front of him each time);
    3.He will stalk me. He will follow me to the bus stop and stand at one corner to wait for me to go up the bus, before walking (despite me telling him to f off (maybe not the f word…);
    4.He will strum his stupid guitar and sing stupid love song at the reception area (by the way, his voice is damn bad ok);
    5.He will call me late at night (btw, I didn’t give him my number) and kena from my father, (but never learn);
    6.He continue to bug me even though I told him to bug off 4598324590891948 times;
    7.One day he asked one of his friend to begged me to tune into this some sort of “Dear Thelma” program, because he wanted to share his problem with some 39743874982374 strangers on air. And also to seek for advice(s) (I couldn’t be bothered. By the way, if I were to give him my advice, I would advice him to BUG OFF);
    Psycho or not?! Anyway, all these nonsense went on for about 1.5 year. Until one day. He requested his friend to find out from me (again, his friend) why I don’t fancy him. This is what I told his friend “Tell him to bang his head into the wall…….”)
    The next day, you guessed it, the friend came running to me and informed me that, that psychotic feller really bang his head into the wall…”
    Psycho or not?
    Anyway, this psycho did not die nor injured himself. And of course, I still do not fancy him and he continues to bug me. not till these days of course!

  190. BB is a reeeeally reeeally really cute dog. She’s white all over with two brown patches on her back. There are these neat little spots near her nose. She’s the most special dog on earth. She can “hand”. She can wag her tail 360 degrees. She likes biting mango leaves to people she likes. She “bite-leaf” to me! To me! To me! She doesn’t give these gifts of affection to anybody, you know.
    The first time I set my eyes on her, she’s so cute she looked like angel. The soft white fur… the cute puppy nose… She was my grandmother’s puppy. She’s not a pedigree but even as she grew, I know it right from the bottom of my heart that she’s the most sophisticated dog in the whole universe. Such poise. Such gentleness. Such grace. She’s a very very gentle dog and sometimes look away shyly if you look straight into her eyes. I simply adore her… although many mean people say she looks ugly. Especially my sisters. They simply cannot comprehend such beauty, I guess.
    She is so pretty. I know it’s not actually healthy to worship dogs like that but… I’d talk about her all day long and draw her on my text books and I write her name everywhere. The very first moment I open my eyes… everywhere I go… anytime… she’s on my mind. She’s like a God to me. I sing hymns about her (BB, BB, swimming in the sea, BB, BB, flying in the sky…) I think I’m a bit obsessed. I’m away from her now. I miss her more than I miss anybody. She plays such an important role in my life. I used to look at her and talk to her and play with her for hours per day, she’s ever so willing to listen. She’s almost human, I swear. I was so worried that she’ll die when she suffered from a weird ear disease once upon a time but she survived. A miracle. And there was once when she disappeared for weeks and got me real worried though I was having my tests then… She came back. Just a few days before I’m back home. I’m away from home coz I’m studying overseas, you see. Again, I have such a longing feeling for her as always… Sigh… I wish I could bring BB here with me if not for stupid customs.
    There’s a girl who loved her too but I guess it’s okay because this means that BB is so cute people can’t help but fall in love with her. I’ve given that girl 20% hak-menjaga-BB because I’m now far far away from my one true love. She’s the ideal dog and I love her so. I love her more than I can love anyone else. She’s my one and only dog lover, though I do love humans and will not commit bestiality.

  191. This is my very own story… a very special one too… i’m using this as a dedication to my loved one… her name’s BB…
    i first heard about her from my best friends… they did not really like BB… i had no idea wat BB was like… so i did not comment that much… it was roughly 3 years ago, i remembered…. when i first saw BB in the eyes… it was like love at first sight… i do not know whether BB loved me then… but i know for sure that i loved her once her powerful electifying eyes shocked my soul…
    then, i knew that she would be my one love… the one i’ll be addicted to for my whole life… BB’s really cute tho my friends said she was ugly… she loves mangoes… particularly its leaves… i do not know why… but she seems to have been in love with it since young… everytime i see her i would give her the leaves… she was so young, innocent and pure…. like in chinese they say 出于泥而不染meaning she’s not polluted although growing up in midst of the mud… BB was really the cutest girl i’ve ever met in my life
    but sadly… she had her loved one… he… was the brother of my best friends… he’s a scary person too… when i first saw him… he looked like a ghost… and i wouldnt want my BB to be in love with a ghost… so i tried to snatch BB away from him… but failed… she still loved him… but somehow i feel that she loves (or likes) me too… everytime BB sees me… she’ll come greet me happily…. i feel rejoiced every second i see her… the world would stop momentarily… i feel the love building up in the air… but im still not sure whether she loves me or not… everyday after school, i would pass by BB’s house and peek at her… and sometimes when nobody’s looking i would go and play with her (dun tell her lover please)
    anyway… today BB’s lover is away… far far down under… and so i get to bercurang with her once in a while… oh heck, i would love to win that piece of white chocolate so i can feed it to BB… but…. i’d rather not join and leave this as an expression of love and addiction to the cutest, cleverest and pretiest dog in the whole world… and pls… lover of BB out there… pls pls pls… let me love her for once… you arent around to be with her anyway… i can see her everyday, hug her and feed her mangoes… you cant… so please let me have her!!
    I LOVE YOU BB 🙂 may our hearts always be together

  192. Is there a desperate addict in your life?
    Yes, my answer is food. I’m desperately addicted to food, since I’m born 15 years ago. This is what I couldn’t live without – and I need it everyday, at least 3 times a day.
    Sometimes – this is thing I need every morning when I wake up, and before I sleep. Food, I LOVE YOU! I have been loving you since I’m born.

  193. i remember back then in F3(i am now 18yrsold) one of my girlfriend was being bugged by a 23 yrs old guy who wanted so badly to her boyfried.she was so young back then,so naturally her parents will object to all kinds of boy-girl relationship.she kept turning the boy down but he just wouldn’t give up.he will buy large teddy bears that cost a bomb and stand outside my school’s gate to wait for her and give the bear to her.occasionally flowers.it was quite embarassing for my friends because he will stand there like a dork.lol.
    after a few rounds of more rejections,he finally stopped bugging my friend.that was what we thought until one night,my friend called me and said the guy is right downstairs her apartment with a guitar singing so so loudly.and it was already near 11pm.her mom got so angry and splash a bucket of water down on him.iced cold water.but he wouldnt leave.the guards told him off as he was so noisy.singing with his guitar.
    then her mum came up with an idea,she asked the guy up into their house and asked what he wanted,he said he wants to be her bf.the mother then said ok,not a problem,here is my daughter’s bank acc number you deposit 10k into her account then you can be her bf.upon hearing that the guy just got up and say goodbye.from then onwards he never ever bugged my friend.and the worst part was,he started to bug me.i told him off the same way but i just demanded for 50k not 10k.
    hah,i hope my experience is hilarious enough to win me a cool phone!

  194. Hello lah, you think that’s desperate?
    I was in KL for a week during school break. Seriously lah, my mother warned me about “siao” west Malaysians. I’m like, hello lah. All Malaysian what. How weird can they be?
    So, upon arriving at the LCCT, (AirAsia lah, what to do?) I stopped by at the shop to pick up a few magazines before going outside to catch the bus down to KL central.
    On the bus, I ended up sitting next to a middle aged middle eastern looking man. He was like.. huge lah. Like the Pillsbury doughboy but hairy. And he smelt like.. weird. Like musky and fruity. Eee.
    So he started chatting me up on the bus, he was a Shisha vendor or something asking where I was from, if it was my first time in KL, how old I was. It started to get sibeh weird when he asked if I needed a place to stay, if I was married (HELLO LAH. 17 MARRIED YOUR HEAD.) and if I was willing to stay in KL and alternate between KL and Egypt. My face is a mixture of [0_0] and [O o O] by then. But still hor, have to politely smile and laugh. Thinking he’s joking. Maybe it’s like.. West Malaysian humour. Who knows lah, right?
    THEN right, when we reach KL central, I’m already FREAKED OUT OF MY MIND, he says.. “In my country, 17 is normal age for girl get married. Actually is quite old already. I tell you what, I already have wife and family in Egypt. But they not live here, so I can look for second wife and they not know. You quite old in my country, is no good. I help you. I marry you. You habibi. Okay? Please? Yes?”
    WAH. LAO. EH. SIAO AHHHHH?!!? Then I’m just like.. “Uhh. I have to go. Sorry.” and run as fast as I can, dragging my luggage with me into a cab. I was relieved once the cab started to drive away. The siao guy still had the nerve to wave at me. I was like.. “Holy shit.”
    I forgot about the guy when I got to my friend’s place to stay. I mean what are the odds of bumping into him again, right? KL is HUGE. So my friend’s boyfriend wanted to go for shisha at this place called Gazebo or something. I remembered the incident lah, but come on. What are the odds of running into the same guy twice?
    .. Apparently very high.
    “HELLO girl. You come find me? Maybe is fat. You be habibi? I good man! I good man!”
    TA. MA. DE.
    WO YAO HUI JIA!!!
    FAT? (I realised later he probably meant fate and I to this day have no idea what habibi is.)
    =(
    I’m scarred for life.
    I can never look at shisha again.

  195. My best friend was those kinda girl everyone wanna “kau” and go for dates wif n stuff…This was last yr..she was in pre-u and there was this guy whom she never knew existed, he STALKED her…he wud like constantly send her sms-es saying tat she’s pretty n like at any moment of the day he can say sumtin so unexpected…it was like he was always watching her…ALWAYS…and then behind her house there was this small pond..everytime me n my other best fren wud tell her tat mayb one day she can see him outside at the pond there in a boat…then he wud lie down in the boat with his binoculars n wud look at her from there…she freaked out so bad and like never wanna open her curtains for quite some time…maybe he DID do tat…we’ll
    never knw..we still dont knw who he is…and my fren is in Aussie now…wonder if he’s there stalking her…rite now…hahaha…
    CHOCOLATE!!!
    freak4god_247@yahoo.com

    Other best friend seconding the comment!
    Here’s the stalker’s blog!
    http://www.mygurlfrances.blogspot.com
    Siao eh.

  196. “Is there a desperate addict in your life?”
    Desperate to be in a relationship.
    I stormed into IRC, one of the channels that the online community I am in, created.
    I started spamming this guy nicknamed shunfujiwara like gawd-knows-why. I do know he is a GUY, but that was it. I started PING!-ing him through the main chat window (if you used IRC before, you know what is PING!) and he replied.
    Then I started spamming (seriously) through the private message window in IRC. And that lead to MSN spamming…
    I didn’t mention to anyone that I had a crush on him. No one knows. I thought it was all for fun, and I wanted and needed some attention (because of my previous breakup which took me down to the abyss of darkness).
    The spamming became more and more after I asked for multiple photos of him. He was a cosplayer, and that made it even prettier, because all the photos of him were in costume AND MAKE UP. (Well, not much make up but an eyeliner makes guys look smexy – if applied in a certain way LOL).
    And NO, he is NOT GAY. HAHAHA.
    It was so obvious I was hitting on him. And the fact that it was only ONLINE.
    To know the danger of befriending (worse – finding partners) through online. LOOL.
    Then I got his handphone number 8DDDD and started spamming his handphone number too. It was all for fun really. (Also deperate for a guy friend or boyfriend, and since he was pretty goodlooking, WHY NOT??)
    So, I didn’t know one thing. He had a crush on me too.
    That was why he replied all the spamming I did. And he came to visit me when I was working parttime and brought Tako balls, and Unagi balls (no, those are not the balls of an octopus and eels, but fishball-like balls made of flour and pieces of octopus and eels). Then treated me to Pizza, and more sushi, sushi, sushi. He brought me out to movies (on him of course) helped me in college assignments, buy for me whatever I wanted….
    Now tell me, who is more desperate?
    LOL.

  197. Picture yourself being “the audience” in every situation. You will be surprised that the view is so wide and vast from different perspective to every aspect. In every situation I guess there shouldn’t be a PERFECT 100% of Right or Wrong because even the worst most horrid kidnapper/murderer/snatchthief has their sadstory to tell 🙂
    It’s quite =( to see that most of us will write a “sOoper” exaggerated most HORRIFIED 1 million and 7 things about the stalker just to impress Mr Kenny for the “sOoper” gila cantik phone 🙂
    Well, it is undeniable the fact that life’s unfair;
    Pretty Ones will surely have their fairytale stories with their many-many-many admirers while
    Less Prettier Ones filled with tormented/malu-fied or rather just boring highschool memories of their many-many-many unsuccessful “crush”es
    Being Audience, the scope is WIDER where we are able to justify for every parties involved.
    Pretty Girl/Boy: The terrible fear that taunts them down whenever the stalker appears.*Things might get worst when you let your imagination running especially after watching Mr Pharmacist from Desperate Housewives*
    The Close Friends: 2 Options Either they find true friendship or true colour reveals.
    A true friend will stick up for their friend
    For the pretty girl/boy, the best friends will try their very BEST in protecting them with their amateur bodyguard/bouncer skills.
    For the stalker, a true friend will offer a 24hr service of phone-line, teddy hug and free flow of tissue papers.
    The Kaypohs(The Gossipers): They practically play the MOST important role in the whole situation. They are the CNN,Paparazzi,Google,MSN,YM…etc..
    *The tongue is a small part of the body but it makes great boast. It is like a fire where it can spark great forest fire. Ya indeed, it can taint a person’s reputation by just a mere innocent mamak gossip.
    The Stalker: One who loves deeply? Nah…Love at first sight isn’t love..but “lust”. One should guard his heart for God to be his bride’s maid so that the story will not turn out like such..The stalker might be tormented with bad memories and might have the six-feet under self esteem. Worst, he/she might even lose hope in love again. Or rather..he might be more creative in trying out new stalking skills…
    But only God knows how many buckets of tears wept.. how many times a fragile heart broken for the one never meant to be his/hers.
    Being human, we are naturally inherently sinful. We love to judge other people, kaypoh about other people’s lives or play Simon Cowell sometimes…
    “DO” take up the challenge being “the audience” Imagine being victim or close frens/family members.. we will understand and feel the pain..

  198. Here’s another freakish addict story.
    It about this Pakistani-Iranian-Bangladeshi or some sort of fella in my college and yours truly. *shivers*
    On day, I was alone in the library reading up for my exams when suddenly this guy comes by and sat down on my table. He started talking and somehow I just didn’t feel very comfortable. Quickly I excused myself and went off. Then, came the next day and again, he would come sit by me and frequent small talks. This happened for another few days and I didn’t like it. I never answer more than one or two words. He would have nothing to say and just stare at me. Even when he sat on other tables, I will always catch him staring at me! Its weird and I was really uncomfortable.
    This freaked me way out. All these table encounters never lasted long as I quickly left after a while. Then, one day the horror slowly unfolds. When I was about to leave, he asked to walk me home. *shudder*. Immediately I froze, refused and quickly ran off!
    Another time he insisted to walk me to class, I made up 238432983506 excuses but they all failed and there was no one there to help me! I left with him tailing behind me and as he turned the other way to collect his bag, I quickly ran the other way into another room. He didn’t see me and I saw him looking every where for me. *sigh*
    After that I refrain myself from visiting the library. I wouldn’t stay till too late before I left and normally choose a table that could accommodate only one person and made sure the tables around me were occupied or book a room to study where I can lock the doors.
    Then, horror strikes again as he starts asking around my friends for my number! It came to a point he actually bugged my friend until she asked me to call him for him not to disturb her anymore. *sweats* Unfortunately for me, he got my number. *wails* I don’t know howww..
    I freaked at the first time he called and told him not to call anymore He pleaded and pleaded for me to talk to him. I’m not a mean person but after the things that have happened I’m scared of him! So politely, I said bye and put down the phone. After that I ignored the rest of his persistent calls. But still, the SMS-es would continue day and night, in class or wherever. I got frustrated. I wanted to strangle him. He just wouldn’t give up *sigh*
    His messages were mushy filled with how I was, stating that we were both a pair made in heaven and from the first time he saw me it was destined we were both meant for each other and how he saw that something in my eye. Aiiiiii…and the messages were accompanied by little chirpy melodies. Double aiii…He sent me reload numbers as well.
    This continued for many more weeks. After a while it stopped. Phew finally, but the chances of meeting up with him in college is still pretty high *shudder*.
    Soon I forgot about him, maybe he graduated, who knows. Then one day I was walking home to my new place and when I turned around I saw HIM a few metres away from me. I froze, freaked and lengthened my walk home. HE LIVES IN THE SAME CONDO AS I DO!!! What a coincidence. *die* I was so afraid of bumping into him in the same lift or he appears suddenly in front of my house. Believe it or not I had nightmares.
    The most recent encounter I had with him was again in the library. He came into the room I was studying and gave me chocolates and proceeded to sit beside me. I refused the chocolates and politely ask him to leave. His smile left him and he silently exited. Ouch, I felt mean but, its freakish lah.
    Then he sat at the tables outside the room and constantly stared inside. I was still disturbed. After a while I packed my stuff and went home. I left the chocolates there, afraid it was drugged or something.
    Maybe he isn’t a freak and isn’t a stalker. But after so many things he did, it just freaks me out to be able to carry a conversation with him or be in the same room. It still hasn’t stopped and I don’t know what next…
    I feel sooo stalked…

  199. Hey Kenny, I’ll make you a deal. Not exactly a story of addiction but rather a case of extremity on my part.
    I know this mega-hot chick who just told me…only last night on MSN how she is so in love with the new LG Chocolate in white. So this is my plan, you give me the phone and i’ll give it to her, giftwrapped with a note “courtesy of kennysia.com” (shameless free-plug) and i’ll send in the photo me making her lucky day. Help a bro score some points and that way you’ll get to know a hottie as well right? *hur*hur*
    P.S I’m putting my life at risk here because just coincidently I actually bought the said item – LG Chocolate in Black for my girlfriend some months back when it first came out. Hope she doesnt read this post.

  200. THIS IS THE GRANDMOTHER OF ALL DESPERADOS.
    My friend eddie met a old chio bu at a pub we used to frequent. After finding his lampa to chat her up, he bought her some drinks and and offered to fetch her home.She accepted his offer, much to our suprise because eddie has a muka beruk. Us guys were damn jealous. But we have to admit that old cow was really DAMN CHIO. Make us feel like milking her dry….okay okay…back to the story…
    Eddie then fetched her to her condo and used the excuse that he needed to pee to get in her pants. They were in the lift when eddie, being the caveman he is, lunged at her kissing her and grabbing her “hooters”. She “layan” him for a few seconds before stopping him saying its enough, that its going to far. My HEROIC friend, out of testosterone desperation sunk below whale shit to say things no man would say….
    EDDIE: please la, please please. For a while only, please, i promise!
    OLD CHIO BU: no, this is going too far. You should go.
    EDDIE(stuttering): okay okay, how about 1 minute more please? please la….
    OLD CHIO BU: Please dont do this…..leave
    EDDIE(stuttering): okay okay okay, 10 seconds la please please….then i go…
    OLD CHIO BU: (giggle giggle)
    EDDIE(stuttering): okay okay, how about 3 seconds?
    The rest is history……..you may not believe it but the old chio bu gave in to his request for some kissing action and subsequently agreed to a ONE NIGHT STAND. He did try to call her after that but she changed her number. We still laugh about it till this very day. Si beh funny….
    conclusion: perseverance is the key….to drill into a woman’s pants

  201. Back in the days of IRC, my friends would attend the various IRC gatherings to meet up with their online counterparts…being a curious cat, i tagged along to one gathering…& pretty much regretted it.
    One of the guys got my number from a friend & started calling me. He would call at 3 times daily. i kept hanging up on him but as if that wasn’t bad enough…he started sending me cards & flowers. He could even describe my dressing on certain days as if he was watching me from outside my house.
    he found my address by looking up my number through the entire telephone directory!! That freaked me out big time!

  202. This is a sordid tale (not mine, told to me) about how far a man can go. Not that I’m any better selling someone’s story for a phone. Children beware I doubt this is PG13. My cousin was living with a bunch of chicks, among one of whom was a girl called “A” who had recently broken up with her boyfriend “B.” Unbeknownst to everyone A and B were participating in a drama that is truly TVB worthy. When A decided to call it quits with B he kidnapped her and kept her in his house for a few days. A managed to call a friend “C” who contacted the in the police and went with them ala SWAT to free A. B who I’m guessing has watched one too many movies, stared right into C’s face and said “I remember you and I will take revenge.”
    For some reason beyond my comprehension A decided not to press charges and B’s parents settled out of court for a sum of RM30,000. A moved out of her home and into the apartment my cousin was residing in. With a combination of sleuthing skills and desperation B managed to find out that where A was living. He made his way there and rang the doorbell incessantly until someone opened the door. Unfortunately the someone was C very luckily did not open the grill that separated her and the. B then staked out the car park block opposite the apartment so he could look into the unit. Occasionally my cousin would look our and B would do a little wave.
    Later B threw bricks across from the car park and shattered window panes in the toilet. He has incorrectly assumed that A was at home and using the toilet. She was in fact out having the time of her life while he pined for her and stuff. He then climbed behind the balcony grill and cut the door so that he could enter the apartment. B kept screaming C’s name and saying that he just wanted to talk. Sure like Hannibal just wants to have dinner. By then my cousin and her housemates had enough and called the cops, who arrived with guns and such in tow. But B had made his great escape.
    So girls, the moral of the story is if the bugger kidnaps you, send the fella to jail, lah! Celaka.
    So there you go outrageous, tick. Bizarre, tick. Stalkish and definitely criminal. Tick.

  203. wah..the amount of entries coming in is amazing…well..kenny all the best reading them….
    BUT i’ve got a better way to make life easier ….just pick mine… no need to read so much okay????
    HUGS AND KISSES!!!!!

  204. back in high school, a girl had a crush on me ( so i assumed), suddenly text me non stop, on and off, give me gifts, for a long period i didn’t even know who she was, i thought i’m darn handsome, can get a chun girl also! sometimes she would text and say things like ‘here no electricity, can i go over to your place and stay?’, it keeps getting worse(the text message i mean), so much so that a disgusting guy like me also felt disgusted.
    She left me one choice, i made an imaginary girlfriend up, and somehow slip that piece of fake info to her, and i heard she cried, that wasn’t the end, though i hoped it was. she kept doing things, and when i finally do see her, i was disappointed, she wasn’t chun or anything, my self-esteem hit rock bottom. I ignored her pretty long, didn’t reply much of her mails, up till now, till got a bit bit, but not much. Thank god.
    Oh well, thinking of it now, it’s kinda funny.
    True story by the way.
    Lordson

  205. When i was in form 4,F4 was so popular and almost everyone was crazy over them.During their first visit to Malaysia,they had a mini concert cum hand-shaking session and most of my friends and classmates went.However,my parents were very strict and they didnt allow me to go with my friends.The day after the mini concert,my friends that went were all showing off to me that how many times they manage to get on the stage to shake their hands and all F4 members were damn handsome…blah blah blah…and one of them even told me that Vanness(i like him most in F4)said that she was cute while shaking her hand,just to piss me off!
    I was quite unhappy but hey…i saw a contest in a chinese magazine that requires the readers to come out with the most creative slogan and the 20 person with the most creative slogans will stand a chance to MEET F4!!!
    During that time,it wasnt about being creative anymore.I was desperate to win.I wanted to meet F4 so badly and i wanted to make my friends jealous.So i wrote in to the magazine telling them im a cancer patient and this might be the only and last chance to meet F4.After a few days,i received a call from the magazine and they said they were willing to give me the chance to meet up with F4.I was damn happy but i felt damn bad ok!Until now,i still feel damn sinful.It haunts me till today.Honestly!
    Anyway,on that day itself,i put on a very white make up to make myself look white and pale.I think i did quite a good job there as all of the people working for that event really thought that i was very ill.They keep asking me to sit down and gave me water.
    I even wrote an apologize letter to them but no reply.I think i’ve been black listed.

  206. When I was 9, I was on a trip to Lumut with my Dad. I was swimming in the pool at the Lumut Yacht Club one evening and there were these two kids who kept following me around.
    A girl who looked about 13 at the time and her brother who was 11 I think. I could’nt really swim well, so the girl kept insisting that she help me around. I kept saying “No”. So she chit chatted with me instead. She asked for my name and stuff, who I was here with (I pointed to my Dad) etc.
    She then rushed back to her brother and they both looked excited. I on the other hand was glad that they had finally left me alone.
    Next thing I knew, I saw her brother go up to my Dad.
    I was like *wth?*
    I got out of the pool and went straight to them.
    I then heard the boy say,
    “Hello Uncle. I always see you around here. Is that your daughter?” *points at me*
    My Dad replies, “Yes, why?”.
    He then introduces himself, “My name is Jeremy, Uncle. I always see you in the same shirt la. I can ask my Dad to give you a new one if you want”.
    My Dad was taken aback and asks, “Oh really? And WHO is your father?”
    Jeremy answers, “The owner of this yacth club”.
    My Dad is *AMAZED*
    Jeremy adds, “So will you bring your daughter back when I give you your shirt?”
    Pfft. Talk about bartering at 10.
    Desperate at 10 maybe?
    I wonder if he’ll give my Dad a boat if we happen to bump into each other again.

  207. Holy moly, i LOVE chocolate (white’s my fav too) and i love handphones and definitely free gifts as well xD
    well well, back when my bf was still sweet and knight in shining armour, he did the sweetest things which makes me feel all jiwang now that i’m thinking back about it 🙁
    When he was still trying to “kao” me he followed me to a saloon and just sat there waiting for me to do my hair because i said i was upset that my best friend was too busy to teman me. I took 4 hours by the way. And after the long hours he surprised me with a real white gold necklace with little diamonds inside. I was in form 4 O.o he was in form 5
    On the day we “coupled” (became official bf gf if there was ever such xD) Well,his nature is that of a air conditioned couch potato 😀 but yet he got his butt up and huffed and puffed with me, jogging around my 3km++ neighbourhood which he walked to from his house which was 5 km away.By the end of our jogging session, he said “i’m too exhausted to be nervous’ So he got down in one knee, ears red and still panting and “proposed”
    On our first month anniversary. He made a long list of surprises for me. Among was making home made konnyaku jelly. He waited for me at a dance class. Unfortunately, before my arrival my best friend told him konnyaku jelly was not my favourite type of jelly (but i still like jelly!) So all my classmates ate it
    The first time we went to sunway lagoon, i wanteed to ride the roller coasters but he was afraid of heights so i went home disappointed 🙁 the second time we went he saw the disappointment in my face so he actually sat on all the scariest rides with me. He conquered fear for me.
    damn you make this so nostalgic xD
    thanks ^^

  208. well, i have a girl friend, G, who is totally in love with this guy, S. G would always tell me how good he looks, the way he laughs, and all sorts of things that i think nobody else notices like the way he always plays with his hair. then, one day G confesses to S that she loves him a lot. S doesn’t know who’s sms-ing him and rejected G. but G wouldn’t stop and kept sms-ing him and kept EVERY of his smses. she would then show it to me and claim that S likes her because if he does not, he would have just ignored her. i tried to tell G that S doesn’t like her but she wouldn’t quit. one day, after recess, the whole class was shocked to see a plastic rose being sticky-taped to the board and “I LOVE U S” being written on the board. everybody laughed their socks off and S was pretty embarassed. he got pissed off and said “who the h*ll did that?”. G then shouted “D(me) did it!”. the whole class just looked at me as if i came from another planet or something. gosh, i was too shocked to say anything but to let S saying all kinds of things to me. later that day, i explained to S through sms to tell him that it was actually G and asked him to not hurt G’s feelings anymore as she has stopped stalking him.
    till now, S and I are still good friends but i didn’t contact G for a long time already. there you have it, a desperate-addict and a poor scape goat. =(

  209. Hm. I don’t know whether it’s called addiction. Haha. Basically, I met a guy in the year 2002. He’s nice and all, fits into the profile of “Guys I would Date”. The only problem was… I already had a boyfriend (Who is also abusive). Let’s call this guy, J. Lol. For the longest of time, J and I were pining for each other. But for some odd reason we just brushed it off since both of us thought that we don’t like each other. We hung out alot, we call each other alot. It was addictive to talk to him; if I can’t talk to him, I’ll be sms-ing him.
    Well, then I broke up with my abusive ex-bf and single yet again. But it was kind of too late for me. J just got together with another girl. But little did I know that it was just for a joke or prank. I was so devastated fter that. GAH. J did say that if he had known I liked him (see? We’re so oblivious…) he would have just told me it was a joke.
    It’s kinda of infuriating actually. I couldn’t sms or call him as often. His gf at that time was kinda jealouso of my closeness to him. But then, I got together with another guy a few months after that. In the end, our friendship began to..fall apart. I couldn’t talk to him as often. So you see, both of us missed the train.
    So anyway, late 2004. He broke up with his now ex-gf. I still don’t know whether I was still addicted to taking care of him. But then, he needed his friend when it happend. 🙂 So there I was hanging out with him a good ammount of time.
    Early 2005, my bf went to Australia for studies. Broke up with me over the phone. Haha. J was there for me as I was for him. It was…nice to know that we still care for each other.
    Just two weeks after my break up, J and I realise that our feelings for each other were still there. It started out as a “testing waters” type of relationship. We didn’t tell our friends for the first 4 days. I swear I was addicted to him after the 4th day. It’s like we were looking at each other and he said, “WOAH! I think I’m in love with you”. We told our friends…and all they had t o say was,”FINALLY”.
    It makes me laugh but kinda sad at the same time thinking about how both of us met. 🙂 He proposed to me on my birthday last year (Coincidentally it’s on the 17th November :P) But we’re planning to finish our studies and work for at least a year or two…then only get married. My addiction for him still last from the day I realised I loved him just as much. True that we had arguments and fights, but that is what’s makes our relationship stronger.

  210. hi kenny,
    i’m here to submit my own desperate addict story. I’m not sure whether it qualify as desperate addict. For the desperate part, yes , but for the addict part is more like an addiction towards preventing myself to look like an addict. Here’s how it goes.
    I had a rival/friend which is always my yardstick in school. She is fair and smart and hardworking. The only flaw in her is that she has a ruthless mouth. But anyway i adore her ‘image’ since Standard 3 that we had been together in the same class. She’s a top student so I had this silly idea that if i copied everything that she does i will be smart too. I even buy the same stationery that she uses. No kidding!! Last time we girls are so crazy over cute stationeries the sort like Tomo and Friends. Hello Kitty’s doesnt even make it into our list yet. In fact i am so crazy until i arrange the pencils and pens the same way she does and keep pretending that i wasn’t copying her style. Anyway we didnt get on very well and i started to hate her. I tried to be exactly opposite of her. Instead of addicted to her style i began to be addicted to be the ‘opposite of her’. She grey her hair long and permed it. I cut my hair short and straight. She is fair and hates sports since she hate sweating. I proceed to play tennis, basketball and got a tan. She adopt the high-pitched, soft-spoken and demure kinda personality (cos it is those that attracted the guys and i hate it and it makes me puke) and I became the tomboyish, loud-mouthed and dared-to-speak-my-mind kinda girl. I am so addicted to become diffrent from her that when i see her studying (and she’s kinda scary when it comes to grades competition), i’m desperate to show that i don’t care less for my grades at school(luckily i didn’t do bad though although i didn’t study as often as she did).
    So there.. although years has passed and we both walk different paths in life. I’m still desparate to keep myself away from her ‘style’. She moved on to mingle with Chinese-speaking community whilst i moved on to mingle with English-speaking community amongst our peers.
    It still didn’t end. And i am still addict to keep myself to be different!

  211. Seriously, I may be 18 but I’m still like a ‘virgin’ when it comes to dating. Yup. I haven’t date any girl in my entire life. There’s once when I think I had started relationship by expressing in a poem that I wrote for her and she actually told me that she likes me as well. But I found out that it’s just me thinking to much and the fact that she tore the valentine card I MADE for her in front of her tuition mates, well, I was thinking too much back then and I was 14!!
    But later I have crushes. I don’t dare to confess at all. But I was desperate. Desperate enough to go around kay po-ing about their likes and dislikes, their attitude, what they think of me and even purposely took another route back to class so that I can meet them and get their attention by giving them a smile. There’s once I pretend I’m some guardian angel to this girl I like by leaving little notes with encouraging phrases and advice. And I even asked her to go for the school prom with me!! All these just to get her attention. But eventually all of them went with other guys in school…

  212. MY bf then try to woo me by suprising me with a room full of candles.Considering i love collecting candles.He lit up every single candle in the room.However when i step into the room,he yell suprise and bump the candle.Eventually,his pants was on fire.Ended up calling the fire department and a weeklong visit at the hospital.

  213. Nyahahha, I hope my parents don’t see this. This is a story told by my mom to me.
    My mom was extraordinary beautiful during her teenage years because she’s a Hainanese. Having meet so many Hainanese in my life and being a half Hainanese, the truth that Hainanese girls are gorgeous is a fact. My mom has a lot of admirers, from nerdy engineers to filthy rich bald guys. One of them was my dad, a guy who determines to court her and plan to marry her.
    Of course my mom weren’t an easy girl to fall for guys. To court her, one must have car to fetch her everywhere she want, pay for the meals, etc. shes not materialistic, but she’s just testing their sincerity. And my dad seriously won this case.
    He would go to my mom’s house everyday and hang around as if hes my mom’s boyfriend. My dad would bring gifts to my grandfather as a showing of sincerity as well. Whenever my mom’s other admirers come to visit my mom, he would welcome them as well. What can I say, my dad is thick-skinned when it comes to love.
    My dad would bring my mom go out and fetch her back and forth from the place she works (so that other admirers won’t have the chance to be beside my mom). Back in those days, when flowers are still the “in” thing to court girls, my dad bought chrysanthemum for my mom instead of roses! Worst, the flowers were wrapped with old newspaper as well. My mom said when she received the flowers, she’s not sure that she should laugh or cry. “Chrysanthemum is meant for formal occasion, not for girls.” But yet she still glad to receive them la.
    My dad consistent existence around my mom has scared away all the others admirers of my mom. They don’t stand a chance at all when my dad is around, even when they go to my mom’s house. Eventually, they gave up and my dad won my mom’s heart as well as he is patient and sincere. One thing I respect my dad in this case is that, I couldn’t believe that a guy would go as far as going the girl’s house everyday. My mom said that he would just sit there all day, accompanying her and her family regardless of other admirers that comes everyday as well.
    I don’t think guys nowadays would do that anymore… haha.. so this is my story of a desperate addict, who is my dad. 😀

  214. i thought contest closes 17 Nov.. why r ppl still posting their stories? not tat i mind, some are hilarious some silly n others jus repititive =P Kenny!! so who’s the winner?

  215. Your question, “Is there a desperate addict in your life?”
    I gotta say it’s a big fat YES!
    This is a true story that happened to me… (hope my mom doesn’t see this!!!)
    It started off this way. This guy I kinda like asked me out. I’ve been waitin for quite long 4 him 2 ask actualy. Anyway, I hesitated at first because I don’t wanna appear easy? After some yes n no n yes n no, at last i said yes but aso added tat I wanna buy something for a friend of mine and mom would not bring me out and blah blah blah… So tat i looked like I’m desperate 2 go out but not cuz he asked. But the truth is, I am desperate 2 go out with him and desperate 2 impress him.
    There is a problem, my mom wouldn’t let me date cuz I’m not even 18 yet. Anyway, I lied 2 my mom (I know this is bad, I feel bad too) and she believed and let me out with my ‘frenssss’… 1st stage clear! 2nd stage, how to get out of my hse and into his car without getting noticed by my mom and sis??? I cracked my head thinking how to distract them and I realised something, dog food finished! Ta da! Asked my mom go out and buy it. Haha. I thought I won’t face any problem with my sis since she was onlining in her room but damn! She offline and started playing piano in the livin room at the last 10 minutes. This means she will see who I was going out with….
    Anyway, the car came and my sis was standing at the front door. She saw everything of course. I did not bother to look at her expression because I know what it is like. I just rushed into his car and guess what… I saw my mom’s car coming from behind. She was just about to reach home. If my friend was late a few seconds, my mom would have saw him. Phew! Anyway, I knew I was going to die when I reached home because my sis saw him. Haha. Whatever. I tell myself everything is gonna be alright. We are gonna watch a great show and have a great day. Lalala….
    We went to the cinema and wanted to buy tickets. To my horror, my friend’s bf was there and saw me. First thing that came into my head, “Busted!” This is because he will surely tell his girlfriend who is pretty close to me. I tried to remain calm and said hi back casually and walked away as fast as posible. Just when i was forgetting that incident, another friend saw me. Omg! I think the guy thinks I’m a fool to even think of going out wit him and at the same time hoping no one will saw us? I feel I’m like an idiot and it was a total embarassment. I don’t think he know how desperate i was to go out with him. Then i gotta message the 2 person who busted me asking them to shut their mouth at school. Anyway, the outing was boring because we never really talk face to face much at school, usualy just chatting via internet. It is difficult to impress him because I bet he went with a lot other better girls than me. So it’s like after all da desperate attemps n embarassment, I’m getting nothing. A big fat NOTHING!
    I reached home. And as I’ve predicted with my 6th sense (haha), sis questioned me. I told her the truth. And thank god she did not tell my mom. Phew! I got away this time but i don’t think I’ll do this again no matter how desperate i am….
    – the end –
    moral of the story – avoid making any desperate attemps..
    title of the story – desperately nothing…
    PS – Although I said I won’t do any desperate attemps again, I am now desperate to have lg chocolate!!! And I hope it won’t end up with desperately nothing again!!
    PPS – Thank you, Kenny, for spending your time reading this!!

  216. Well, during my final year in a university, I am so desperate to buy an Ogawa massage chair for my dad whose health is not so good that I work as a part time tuisyen teacher. I am not so fortunate that I got RM150 per hour teaching statistic. I only teach primary and secondary school. The end result is I can’t cope with my lecture especially exams. Then I am so desperate to get at least B+ for all the subjects. So I cheated. I don’t dare to do those things you are imagining right now. All I did is copy all the formulas on my eraser. On top, below, left, right, front, rear, the clothes the eraser wear. Any space you can think of. Not enough space so mah write in a small piece of paper and put it deep inside the pencil case. Then before the examination I went into the hall and scribble the answer on the table. Then during examination I would ran out and had a quick glance at the notes I left near the toilet. That’s how desperate I wanted to score not so ugly in my exams so my dad can sleep well at night. Please don’t follow this bad example as you are not as lucky as I am for not being caught.
    P.S. I still didn’t earn enough money to get Ogawa chair.*cry* But I gave the money I earn to my dad and thus making him harder to sleep at night.*cry*
    Another one, I have a boyfriend which we have been together for more than 4 years but still we are remaining at phase 1. Every time he advances to phase 2, I will stop him. (I only think that is appropriate after marriage.) Then one day when he arrived at my house I was wet because of washing my fish tank. (I am not even wearing white shirt, just a black bra). He is so excited that he rushed towards me and accidentally bumped into my temporary fish bowl smashing it into thousand of pieces. Not to mention the resident fell to the floor and keep flapping its’ poor body trying to grasp some air and not to swim towards the white light. Then I have to keep my fish in a soup bowl instead. Later he claimed he just wanted to hug me, do you believed that? So every time he tries even the slightest movement besides kissing I will tell him “Do you still remember Big Eye (my fish)?” All his desire will get turn off immediately.
    P.S. Big Eye still couldn’t avoid the call of duty from God. So he is now swimming in the after world fighting at the front line shooting the devils with an M-16. Its death had nothing to do with my boyfriend; it was because of fungus growing from the wood sculpture placed with the fish. *cry*

  217. There WAS a desperate addict in my life. No need to name names heh. Aside from the countless time he came back to Kuching from Aussie to to look me up each time we argued, there was also the HUGE bouquets of roses. And the gargantuan Mashimaro that is still hogging space at home because nobody wants the god-awful giant rabbit almost two feet tall.

    And did I mention the my initials he had to fucking get on himself AFTER breakup? That got me back for awhile. And the other two pieces when he was away and things were on the rocks? That was idiotic. But the cherry on the cake was when he attempted to get me to marry him just so to keep me. Threatening to call my mum up to announce his proposal was dumb. REALLY dumb.

    And maxing out his gold card numerous times? When I didn’t ask for all those material things (ie. giant stuffed rabbit, big bouquets of flowers that wilt in a few days), just a little freedom to breathe and to live? That was obsessive. You can’t buy love, baby.

    All those tattoos? Wtf. If every relationship = body mods, he’d quickly become some sorta fucking passport with stamps denoting each girl dated. Yes, I told him so. Some people just need some sense knocked into them.

    I myself am a desperate addict at the moment. I need a new phone. You’re offering one. I CANNOT live without a phone. I just lost a phone. I have no phone, am using someone’s screwed up phone.

    So to demonstrate how fucking addicted I am to those thingamajigs, I’ll make a fool of myself here. I’ll tell you about the time I dropped an OLD nokia 8250 into a public loo I’d just peed in.

    To this day I still cringe at what ensued in the next few moments after this.

    Yes, I dipped my hand into the squat toilet with my piss in it and fished out…

    Twenty fucking cents. And then I dipped my hand in. Again. To scrabble around that dirty toilet. *shudders*

    All that only to retrieve a phone that wouldn’t be revived, despite my best efforts to dry it out. Eww. Wasted effort.

    All just because I felt that between feeling around a dirty toilet bowl, and living without a bloody phone, the latter was the more painful option of the two.

    Eh good luck with sorting through all these submissions. Such an unenviable task, and there’s a month left for submissions to pour in. Heh.

  218. hi,
    i was a popular girl in my old school and i say this because i really think my life used to be so so so joyful, exciting, bright, and fRIENDS everywhere. i didn’t know how lucky i was. Until last year, i moved to another country with my dad and had to start my life all over again. i was really excited because i thought i could live the life i always wanted, cause guess what? i’m at oversea now!! more freedom!! and everything is going to be so much cooler than my hometown!! But NOT!!. things don’t turn out the way i dreamt for. i hate school so much. everyday was like hell. i feel UGLY and disgusting and LONELY. i always thought people would see me as an ugly dinosour. i became depressed easily at times and i always locked myself in my room rather than going out. i EAT(a lot)only to make myself feel better. but i just hated myself SO MUCH after eaten so many junks. i tried to make myself vomit and also spent my money on laxatives. i was very emotional. people started to call me a bulimic. sometimes i would just starve myself for days, or suddenly burst into tears but most of the time i day dreaming. i am not insane but i pity myself.
    i just had a desperate addiction towards a “wonderful dream life” and when everything turned up-side down, i just realized i only have to appreciate and pay a liltle bit more attention to what i have now. life is never fair, but what can i do?
    thank you.
    wing

  219. Wow, so many contestants. I’ll post mine up anyway =)
    When I was in Standard 6, i had a stalker-ish guy who liked me. Every week, without fail, I would receive letters from him. And out of 7 days, i would receive phonecalls from him at least 4 times.
    One time, I went away for a week to join a competition. When I went back to school, my drawer was stuffed with letters. One for each day, and he did my homework for me.
    After a while, the letters started to have words like “You HAVE to accept me, if not I will die!!” and likewise variations. Obviously I didn’t take it seriously.
    One day he told me he’ll bring a knife to school if i did not accept him. I still thought he was kidding.
    The next day he really brought a knife to school. He came up to my place, showed me the knife, grinned and said, “I told you,” It was a small knife used in the kitchen, not chop meat material, but it was enough to send the 12-year-old me into a frenzy of panic. That knife could definitely slit wrists.
    I worried and fretted the entire morning till lunch time. I guess I kept thinking, “when is he gonna cut it(wrist)? Will he cut it? What to do if he does?!”
    So, when lunch time came, he went down to the canteen and I stayed in class with another male friend(who incidentally, also liked me) who knew of my worries. He went to the boy’s bag, took the knife out, and broke it in half. (hard to believe this happened when I was 12 >

  220. ~*~*~*~*~*~*~*~*~*~*~*~*~*~*~*~*~*~*~*~*~*~*~*~*~*
    Here’s 2 short real stories of my friends!
    I had this classmate back in Primary 5 whose besotted with a Japanese girl in our class. He would unshamefully proclaim his love for her to the entire class through poems and thus allowing the boys to tease him whenever she walks in the class or her name is being called out. It went to the point that during P.E (physical exercise) classes, he would sneak in to the classroom when we were all out, and drink from her bottle. I caught him once! He probably thought thats the only way to be close to her, since she’s nonchalant to the fact that he likes her.Now that’s a desperate addict!
    MY last true story is of my highschool classmate, whose so totally in loveee with the girl he’s after…he misscalled her 143 times on her handphone to potray his serious deep love for her with the numeric word of ‘I LOVE YOU’. Total insanity…I never come across anyone who would this thing, other than him!
    Kenny, can I have the LG chocolate white? Pweety puleazeee! I really do want it! heheh ^__^!
    -ChocohoLic-
    ~*~*~*~*~*~*~*~*~*~*~*~*~*~*~*~*~*~*~*~*~*~*~*~*~*

  221. Good day to you Kenny,
    I am Mr. Alington Cole, UK partner/confidant to Late Mr. Andreas Schranner, a German property magnate who lost his life in a plane crash on the 21st of April 2000, along with his family. Andreas had some huge amount of united states dollars deposited with a Fiduciary company for his political ambitions; it was deposited in my name as he never wanted to disclose he was the owner of the deposit due to his political ambitions(I have the deposit certificate with me). The existence of the deposit is known to just me and our “eye” in the company. I decided to wait these years to check if anyone will come
    out to say he or she is aware of the deposit and again it proves the confidentiality we shared. May his gentle soul continue to rest in peace, amen.
    As a result of my intentions to relocate and to be double sure the funds will never be traced to me by any of his creditors that new us as partners, I am constrained by the circumstance to seek your assistance to transfer the money out for safety and for investmentpuroses, the earlier we do this the better for me. When we meet face to face, very soonest, you will understand the reasons why I cannot come out openly to lay claims at this time but a neutral and capable hand. A power of authority will be endorsed in your favour. Be rest assured that this deal is almost a 100% risk free.
    The funds are in excess of $11.2 million. Can you help? are you really capable of handling funds of this magnitude? are you really
    trustworthy? For your assistance you will be offered 30%. Please your urgent reply is highly needed to enable me ascertain so you can be
    furnished with details. I am assuring you that I have done a proper home work to avert any fear of insecurity to us on the aftermath.
    Thanking you in advance.
    Im a desperate addict in search for help.

  222. This guy,a hi-bye friend,just went through a break up with his girlfriend of 5 years.At first I didn’t know.
    On the first few days oof our meeting,he kept telling me about how sweet she was,how sexy she was,etc-talking like he owns her even!Then he tells me that everyday he goes and watches her walk back to her house and 1 day he saw a car drive up to her driveway.She was in the car with another guy and they started making out!He jumped out of the bushes and started screaming at them things along the lines of “You watch out”.Obviously the couple got freaked out and ran into the house.Then he took a better look at the girl and it turns out it was her sister =P

  223. There was this girl that I coupled with when I was young. And the only reason I ever went with her was because I wanted to do a friend a favor(imho she was quite ugly). It was embarrasing that I was known for being ‘with that ugly girl’.
    Anyway, on the first night of our ‘relationship’, while at a business opening of a friend of my dads, I received an sms from someone. I asked who she was, and she said she was a friend of the girl i coupled with. it annoyed me that the girl gave out my handphone number to her girly gang. soon enough, i was bombarded with phone calls and smses asking me what I liked about her, if i broke up with her can i couple with them?(wtf?), and even one asking if she could borrow me for a week.
    my sister Jolene was laughing her head off.
    I called up the ugly girl, and told her it was over.
    The next day in school, one of those friends came up to me, and gave me a letter. ugly girl wrote me a letter.
    I think the first line of it was “please read this before you throw away-”
    wouldn’t know. I threw away the paper.
    Some girls are just desperate to couple.

  224. ~ PERFECT GUY ADDICTION ~
    *************************
    other guys bring me out for dinner
    but this guy cooks for me
    other guys buy me birthday cards
    but this guy hand made it for me
    other guys buy me flowers
    but this guy plants and plucks it for me from his garden
    other guys sweet talk me
    but this guy make me feel so sweet
    other guys drive me around
    but this guy walks with me by my side
    other guys buy me expensive stuff
    but this guy gives me things money can’t buy
    other guys play my favourite songs
    but this guy writes love songs and sings to me
    other guys care on how i look
    but this guy loves me for who i am
    other guys would do things that i like
    but this guy would never force me do things i hate
    other guys share the joy with me
    but this guy bear my sorrows other than sharing joy
    ***********************************************
    this guy seems to be most perfect guy alive…
    but i’m saying this on behalf of this lucky girl i know..
    some people just do not cherish what they have..
    i’m not the lucky one BUT just wanna wish him all the best of happiness in life..
    if i am the girl, i would be very “xing-fu”

  225. hm… ok i’m gonna tell you my experience.
    It happened to me about january to february this year… 2006…
    I was still working then and i took a few days off work to travel to Singapore for a break. I went with my cousin and our friend. We were going to meet thier boyfriends there, so i was like the fifth wheel… the spare tyre.
    We booked our tickets online with air asia from Kuching to Johor, everything was planned and set…
    I was so happy to get away from work, that i blogged about the trip to Singapore.
    Well, little did i know, the guy i was trying to avoid read it… and then sms-ed but before that called me about 2am++ the morning before i left… asking what time i would be going off. Ofcourse i did the sensible thing and not reply him.
    my flight out was about 9am or so. I was so glad to be leaving Kuching and away from him… eventhough it was only for a few days. Before i even left my house to the airport, he kept on calling me. I did not answer of course.
    My cousin and fren were already at the airport and had checked in for me already. I gave them a call and told them i was on my way.
    When i got to the airport… i was so excited until i pulled my luggage over to them… i did not notice anything else until… my fren said… “Hey, guess who’s here…” I looked behind her… and there HE was!… i didn’t look him in the face… turned around… and said to them, lets check into the terminal.
    My fren told me that he was “sending a fren off”… and he tried to call HIM all morning… neways i told them… he was calling me all moring b4 i got to the airport…
    “They told me that he ask them to go check into the terminal first… then they told him, they were waiting for me to arrive…
    neways… i was soooo freaked out….
    this guy is erms.. weird and he was my exclassmate… and during highshool… i already got a vibe that he felt something for me…
    maybe i was being too friendly… and ppl just get the wrong idea…
    i’m just too friendly at times…
    sorry.. my story’s a little too loso…
    i’m still freaked out about it… so nowadays when i travel… i only blog about it later… so it would never happen to me again… sigh~

  226. I have a friend who is addicted in playing neopets(www.neopets.com).
    In neopets, you own a pet which is called ‘neopet’ and you have to feed them and take care of them. Well, my friend here is too addicted to it that she sometimes calls her pet dog ‘neopet’.
    In neopets, they call soft toys ‘plushie’. Even my friend calls my soft toy pig ‘plushie whenever she comes to my house.
    In neopets, they call money ‘neopoints’ aka ‘nps’. “Haih, I don’t have enough nps to buy food leh,” that’s what she told me the other day.
    In neopets, the bank there where you put your nps is called ‘Neopian Bank’. Well, she calls Bank Pusat ‘Neopian Bank’ sometimes.
    In neopets, there’s a chatting board called ‘NeoBoards’. Well, she would call the tagboards or chat board ‘NeoBoards’.
    And she logs on to it every single damn day! Addiction? Yep, VERY addicted. Haha.. Kinda freaky too, you know.

  227. Dear Kenny…
    My you’re an intriguing person. Witty, considerably attractive and appropriately caustic. Just reading your blog is sufficient in exciting fangirl squeals out of me. You have venerable traits, an insurmountably huge fanbase, and your epiphanous entries are like mannas from heaven. Your very presence…

    Okay let’s cut the crap. I doubt this ass-kissing technique would work anyway.
    Here’s an actual story;
    I’m seventeen and I’ve never dated. Not to say that I’ve never had the opportunity, but it isn’t in my list of priorities. Studies first, right?
    At a slight tangent (pertaining to my features), I’m considered somewhat attractive to Malaysian standards (At least according to my grandmummy… :3). That’s not surprising, since Malaysian females are mostly;
    a) Females that are either occult members of the menacing Hello Kitty clan, the maliciously evil Mashimaro coterie… or numerous other obscenely cute paraphernalias that otherwise ignite homicidal tendencies in the rest of us. DIE YOU INSANELY CUTE HELLO KITTY! DIE!!
    b) Ah lians. (I don’t have a thing against them… Okay that was an overt lie. Last thing we need are more airheaded bombshells to further disintegrate the female reputation. …I’m talking like this because I just watched Oprah.); Anyway…
    c) Anorexics. If not, then borderline-anorexics. (Or maybe I’m just jealous over their covetous figures. Round-shapped asses.. flattering proportions… perky breas- yeah, you’re right. Let’s not get into details… I can hear Kenny chanting “Must… resist… hard-on…”, so err… good idea.);
    d) Drop-dead hot ladies with model-esque features that are… religious. (Most of the pretty girls in schools are smart, have faith and are generally agreeable, while the pimply-faced, gregarious fugly sort (with very nice figures though) are the ones that are sexually precocious. Can anyone explain why?); And
    e) Cock-teasing jail-baits. I see enough outsiders drooling at the under-aged chikitas of my school to know this. 😛
    …Sorry for digressing. The point is, I did have my fair share of admirers. Why did I list five biased classifications of the female species to affirm this simple statement? Because I’m bitter. That’s why. Now shut up and read the rest of my story. >:| *bitter*
    So anyway, I had an experience back in primary school. During that period, my mathematical foundation was mostly ‘Boy + Girl + Hand-touching = PREGNANCY’ (Darn you, elder sister/pathological liar), so you can imagine how I ignored the male species like the plague.
    A Malay classmate I knew had the hots for me and he especially stood out from all the rest because even at the tender age of 11, he wrote… suggestive love letters. Sexual innuendos, sickening fantasies, you name it. Worst off, he shared the same name as my dad. So yeah, I at least know I wasn’t an incestuous kid back then. Shocking.
    This kid would write at least two letters daily but we never really talked. It got to the point where I would tacitly walk up to him, tore the letters and chucked them into the nearest wastebasket. I was going for drama and all, but I missed the basket so… moving on…
    He was undeterred and continued making passes. I could hardly bear the teasing from my mates. He however, seemed to relish in it. I noticed he would even nudge his friends sometimes when I approached and as if on cue, the teasing ensues. That’s like going; “Oh shit… my crush is coming… HURRY! WHAT ARE YOU DOING?! EMBARASS ME!”
    Long story short (Since I know the “OMG this guy likes me! Now I shall unravel in painstaking details his actions in winning my heart. I mean, he just looked at my general direction for one second! How can you deny attraction now?!” thing is really cliched), he did something vulgar. He touched my privates when I was preoccupied with chatting up my friends. Upset, I ran up to the teacher and informed her. Later, both our parents were informed, and his given excuse was ‘I was grabbing for a table! I didn’t know what I was touching!’. Possibly, it was the truth and it was just the 11 year old me exaggerating but nonetheless, his notorious fame as a delinquent was to my favour.
    Following that event, the incident spread like wildfire across the school staff. Our subject teachers looked at him with contempt and he was treated mercilessly. He was reprimanded heavily for the slightest mistakes and our female schoolmates would act hostile towards him.
    His parents fought for clarification with the school administration since they were certain that the story was fabricated. Thing is, he was already a blacklisted kid anyway and my take on his perversion was the tip of the iceberg that gave the school a reason to alienate him. Few days later, he transferred. Probably couldn’t take the pressure. …I do get on a guilt-trip when I reminisce this incident, though. Poor kid. He was merely 11 and ignorant.
    So was that desperate enough? Hankering for just attention from your crush until it left you no choice but to grab at her unmentionables? Let’s hope so. That experience was the highlight of my primary school years, since I stamped a fellow 11 year old as a sexual offender. Hah.
    …Oh wait, I was acting guilty. Right.
    Oh, and from then hence, I learnt the term ‘sexual harrasment’. I think I get the basic idea on its usage… “What? Kenny Sia wouldn’t give me the LG phone?! THAT’S SEXUAL HARASSMENT!”
    PS: Kenny, when are you giving out a PS3 for free, huh? Postage won’t be too expensive for that lil’ bugger, considering I’m from Kuching too. 😛

  228. Year: 1995
    See, scout is one thing I really love since I was a kid, malay ppl say “Hutan tu macam padang mainan aku la” so I really love venturing into jungles despite whatever danger lah. So when I was in high school I became very active that I participated in all sort of Scout camps whicever applicable to me lah, so when I was in Form 2, there’s this test called Lencana Maju and for once I brought in a few chinese friends to join scouts namely Ah Yaw, Ah Seng and Kher Yu. Anyway it was a 3 days 2 night camp at a camp site called Hutan Rekreasi Kuala Woh in Tapah, Perak. So, you see this camp really test one’s endurance in surviving actual camp life in the jungle and my fellow chinese friends are from “quite-rich-buncha-kids” la…so everytime makbapak masak for them type…especially Kher Yu. Upon the 2nd day of camp as we were on break to cook dinner, he sat by the corner of our camp area and started crying and crying, so me, Ah Yaw and Ah Seng approached Kher Yu and asked;
    Me: Oii, meh si oh? (Oi! Wassup la?)
    Kher Yu: Ngo hou kua jue ngor ma….*sobs* (I missed my mom)
    Me, Ah Yaw & Ah Seng: HArrr??? Mut Lan oh? (WTF???)
    Kher Yu: Ngo deng mm soon jor…*sob sob* (I kennot tahan oledi)
    Me: Diu lei ah…tor 1 yat jek…teng har la…(Fak u la, 1 more day to tahan mah)
    Kher Yu: Tan hei ngor mou sai chin jor (But, I no more money oledi)
    Ah Yaw: Lei mai mut lan ohh? (WTF u spend on?)
    Kher Yu: Ngo mai jor Ramli Burger hou toh lap…(I bought alot of Ramli burger)
    Ah Seng: Tai sei larr….ngai lei sek fan yau mm moi..(Padan muka, ask u eat rice dunwan)
    Me: So…tu mm sai Ham Pao hei mei ah??? (So like this oso cry ah?)
    Kher Yu: Ting yat oi fan okei mou chin tap bas…an chua? (Tomolo no money sit bus..how?)
    Ah Yaw: Lei hou lan diu laaa…ngo ceh pei lei larr(U damn fakup la, I lend to u la..)
    Kher Yu: *sobs* tan hei kam man ngo yau yiu sek Ramli burger wor…(But tonite I still wanna eat ramli burger)
    Me: Mahem lei ah…mou chin chung yiu sek? Yak sii laa!!! (Blardy u, no money still mau makan burger, eat shit laa!)
    Kher Yu: *sobs* ngo sek li tou geh fan, teng mm soon…kau tou ngo kap si…(I eat the rice here kennot tahan, make me wanna shit)
    Me & the gang: ayoyoyoyoyo….okla ok laa…mou ham… (aiyo..dun cry ok)
    Me: kam man ngo cheng lei sek burger la ok…(ok la, tonite buy u 1 burger la)
    Kher Yu: toh ceh..(tengkiu)*sniffs sniffs*

    ps: The conversation has not been altered at all, it was those kind of language we used back then altho the arrangement might not be exactly the same but it’s seriously DAMN HILLARIOUSSSS SIALLLL…..

  229. Essentially, we’re all addicts in our own rights. Love-struck fanatics, sports aficionados, they’re all the same. We must have all been desperate addicts in someone else’s lives in a way or another. This of course, does not exclude even an insignificant small fry like me.
    Speaking of such an addict, there is indeed one in my life. She’d do anything in her power to defend her feeble right to love. She’d incise her chest and rip her heart out to prove her love. She’d cry till her eyes bleed in attempt to blind herself of the love she is denied. She knew not of the words dignity and pride for her self-respect is non-existent. She’s completely and utterly obliterated of emotions other than the romantic love she has for her beloved. She is mind-fucked by this single emotion. She no longer emotes again. She is alive but dead. She is a love addict, yes she is. A desperate one at it, for it has destroyed her so utterly that she has to cling onto this only entity that is left in her.
    From the horse’s mouth.
    Just want to share something (:

  230. Ok. Last year, I saw the most desperate acts ever, by this girl I know. Let’s call her L. There was this guy, S, who I introduced to her when we went for this festival together. God, it was crazy, obsessive infatuation at first sight on her part.
    That night, I bore witness to them dancing like they were on some sort of sex show, hips grinding, hands roving, mouths open etc. To further impress him, she jumped into the pool in her itsy bitsy tube and skirt, fully dressed at 2 in the morning. Freezing, they went to the room he had to ‘dry off’. And what was I to find when I came long looking for a towel?
    Both of them. In the bed.
    It was only later that I found out (confirmed) that she gave him her virginity on the first night they met.
    The next day, S got bored with her and started making moves on me. She was pretty damn desperate to get his attention back. So she walked around our room in a towel when he was talking to me. Then, she disappeared into the bathroom only to come back wearing nothing but a bra and thong. After strutting her stuff around the room again, she snagged my semi see through skirt and picked the most provacative outfit possible for a night of dirty dancing.
    L tried to seperate S from the group of friends we were with (including and especially me). But he found us, and suddenly he was dancing with me. L was pretty pissed by then, but I was still pretty blur. She then grabbed my friends boyfriend, C, and dragged him away.
    L knew he was SO taken, but she made out with him in hopes of making S jealous.
    Didn’t work though, so I saw her act drunk to get S’s attention. Then she sat up and hugged him when her face was level with his groin! I think she was ready to give him a blow job again there and then, in public, right in front of us. (she’d already given him one the night before)
    Ah, it was a tangled web we wove, and I regret it immensely. The next few weeks were a series of tears, stalking and calling. She made enemies with a lot of people, calling S every few hours to demand where he was, bursting into hysterical fits. She even sacrificed her friendship with her close friends, some who were also interested in S.
    So there you have it. L, my dignified friend, gave up her virginity, made out with a taken guy, acted like a slut, cut off her friends, became a psycho stalker and much more… all for a guy.
    And you know what? It didn’t work.
    P.S. I would appreciate it if it was possible to keep this story as unnoticed as possible, since it’s pretty private.

  231. I used to had this major crush on this senior in my school. This happened
    when I was 13. I was desperate to do anything to get his attention. I found
    out his name from many different sources. Yet I managed to keep my secret
    away from everyone.
    Everytime I hear his name, my heart would go crazy and I will casually ask
    about any info I can get about him. I even search for his info on ICQ (when
    it was still popular). I had his ICQ, e-mail, cellphone number, HOUSE
    ADDRESS, HOUSE NUMBER and so on. Any little piece of info on him was
    important to me. After getting all his info, I did everything I could to get
    his attention. I even dressed up for no reason just to get him to take a
    glance at me. I casually walk past him all the time. I even tried to kepo in
    when he was talking with my friends. I even laughed like an idiot around
    him. I used my sweetest voice (but somehow I think it wasn’t sweet at all)
    when I was near him. But too bad for me that he didn’t give a darn about
    that. You could say I was sort-of addicted to him. I even saved whatever
    photos I have of him for me to look at whenever I’m bored. I did anything I
    could to grab his attention. I tried the ‘I am cute please look at me’
    way. The ‘I’m too cool for you but secretly I just want you to notice me’
    way. And even the ‘I know you but I just pretend I don’t know you’ way. But
    it just so happened that he won’t notice me at all. I was put into the same
    group as him a few times during church telematches. I even complimented him
    and kissed his ass but he wouldn’t even budge at all. It happened for TWO
    AND A HALF BLOODY YEARS!!
    I was so desperate to get his attention that I didn’t even realise that it
    was just puppy love. Past is past. I’m happy with my life now. =) So PLEASE
    give me the LG chocolate…pweeety pwease with vanilla ice-cream and lots
    and lots of melted chocolate and sprinkles….=D

  232. Well, you know all that love jazz in Secondary school. So, there was this girl (as how stories usually start), she was a sister of my friend. After she knew me, she got my number from her sister and started sms-ing me things like “I’m bored. What are u doing there?”, etc. Then slowly, 2 months later, I found her in my Physics tuition class. And not surprisingly, 3 weeks later in my add maths tuition class. I did not sense anything initially but it turned obvious when she started secretly taking pics of me using her mobile, and I caught her twice and made her delete it.
    That went on and somehow rumours said that she had a folder filled with my pics and videos. One day, she dropped her purse and she has a picture of my face in it! That’s when I told her I am not at all interested in her more than friends and she said she understood. Then, she continued on making me things like frienship bands, customised cards and bookmarks. Her actions went overboard when her sister went in her room one day found a small pic of my face in a picture frame with her face next to her bed, a collage of me as her desktop background, and an “eye” picture I drew out of boredom during tution, which I threw away at the end of the class and she must have probably picked it up.
    But she stopped after her sis found out, and I avoided her until today. As nice as the attention sounds, it’s scary.

  233. FIVE hoursss readingg. my eyess… painfulll. ahaha! but worth it! funny!
    do you believe in sex before marriage??
    ahahah!! iwilleatyourpetfrogalive, that made my stomach hurt from laughing.

  234. This is a repost since my earlier posts were lacking ind etials because i was typing when i was most sleepy. So i bucked up on some caffeine to retype the incident.
    There was this girl who had a crush on me, she started out sending gifts ordered from societies in school. Who wouldn’t be excited right to have an admirer? Turns out it was horrible.
    She got my phone number, then started texting me every few days, first it started off like how do you do and what is your favourite colour. So no harm spending that couple of cents to entertain her since my circle of friends quite limited.
    The it gotten more intense, it went on to how she commented on my looks after my new haircut, and also inviting me to places(which she joked about obviously) such as Palace of the Golden Horses for lunch or something, and then she asked if i like her or she send some chain mail which i had to reply to if not she’ll get furious.
    The worst was when she said she wanted to come over to stay with me since her house no electricity. I freaked out so much.
    I devised a plan with another femal friend, she sort of have troubles with a guy too. So we pretend play to be a couple, i slipped it to the girl through a friend, and she cried, so i heard.
    But that didn’t stopped her, she texted less fequent, and slowly slowly died down, but still mails me now and then. i felt relieved and conveniently broke up with my ‘girlfriend’.
    That’s it, only story i could think of from my life that fits into this category to win.
    Thanks!

  235. This story is about me 😛 So ironic. It’s something like first love. Kindda.
    It begins at early of this year. I had a crush on a girl, she just came back from Australia. Well, she’s diffrent than all the typical “Mui Mui Jai” in my school. She was a very decent, polite, sweet girl. You know those Ah Bengs and Mui Mui Jais will definatly go to her since she came back from Australia. Well, I talked to her like a normal friend but soon I really had feelings from her and started to have crush on her.
    One day, I asked for her number and she gave. Every single day I would sms her showing my desperate to know her more. lol. Every day, I would act like a stalker and follow her everywhere she goes. She didn’t show any expression but behind my back. She would tell people about me following her everywhere like a stalker. I felt like an idiot. Well, I get to know about this and started to follow her less, don’t want to be a stalker to her but yet I didn’t gave up. I waited for a chance to strike again! lol.
    She entered to this drama competition so I became a busybody and started to butt in to the crew and take my chance to know her. I know I’m so freaking desperate but all I could do is just stare at her although I’m desperate to talk to her. But the funny thing is, everybody that involved in the drama knows why I am there. Duh, of course get a chance to be closer to her. I still remember the first time I hold her hands, when they’re competiting in the district zone and they were announced as the winner. I felt happy that I was able to hold her hand. As time goes on, she knew I had a crush on her but she didn’t react to it and just play along with it as if she didn’t know i’m in love with her.
    Her birthday was around the corner. And as a desperado, I had to plan a surprise birthday party for her. And indirectly telling the whole world how desperate I am to woo her. Spending Rm200+ inclusive of cake and present for her birthday is a costly for secondary student and I think it was worth it. She loves the present and the party so much and even more, I, being the desperado also made a video of her. Composing all the things about her and put it in a video. How smart huh! lol! I was totally shocked when she told me that her parents wanted to see me cause they were impress. Impress of the video that I made for her.
    But….. I still dosen’t dare to confess to her up to now although I showed signs of desperation. Time will tell weather she and I have any chances of getting together. And 24/7 I will be thinking about her, check her friendster,myspace. And often stalks her sister and her friend to get more latest updated infomations on her. XD
    Wish me luck Kenny!! lol
    =)

  236. heyz Kenny!
    Well, this is my story…
    I was in Form 3 then…most of us were still ‘innocent’ and all, and a lil attention from a guy would make you the hot topic for the week.
    So i used to take music classes, and i met this guy A. He plays the trumpet and well, he was a weird guy. Don’t know how he got my number, but he started sending all sorts of msgs and call at odd hours. My parents would often question me about the late night call and i had to pretend it was my friend. One day, my dad picked up the phone to make a phone call and heard him on the phone I pretended he was my teacher! But of course my dad knew better than that.
    I was in an orchestra that time and we were busy preparing for a concert. So he asked his teacher if he could come for practice(despite the fact that he just started lessons) and during practice, he had to play a solo(there aren’t many trumpetists in kch) and you can guess..everybody started laughing. Quite pitiful actually, but my friend said he went just so that he could see me…lolx! Sounded like fart.
    Anyways, it got quite annoying after awhile so everytime he called or texted, i said that i was studying. I even had a little help from my friends to tell him that i was a complete nerd and soon after he thought i was a study freak/nerd that he stopped stalking. The thing is…i absolutely hate studying!
    I see him from time to time, but we would pretend like we’ve never met 😉

  237. I’ve got many admirers in my uni when I first came in because of my friendly and outgoing personalities which makes me rather popular. There’s a guy from my batch fallen for me, after a month plus knowing me. He sms me all the time…When I go for jogging, he would ask me to ask him along. We live inside the hostel in uni. Hence, everyday for dinner, he would date me out for dinner, sometimes he would date me out to city. Till a day, he hinted me by telling me that he never sms a girl that much. But I didn’t get the hint…Finally the day before a week holiday break, he finally confessed to me. I can sense that he liked me but I wasn’t sure, I didn’t know how to react and kept smiling. So after that, everytime, he was so desperate that he would grab my mobile and check my message inbox and read my msg inside if the msg is from a guy!! However, I don’t mind, even though my best frens told me that I shouldn’t let him to do like this. I’ve got good impression on him so I kept asking him to give me a longer time to consider, he don’t mind waiting though but everytime he got the chance he would ask me that how he’s progressing, what do I think of him and there’s a time that he is desperate until he tell me that he really wanted to be with me. And slowly, after 4 month of courtship, I began to fall in love into him and we were together for more than half years but we broken up in the end.

  238. The funniest attempt ive come acrossed was a friend who went on national radio to ask a girl out. The DJ played along by helping him call the girl and left clues as to who was after her.
    She was sharp enough to guess the culprit and then was asked if she would go out on a date with him. She agreed! I guess it’s not nice la to reject someone on national radio. Poor girl must have had a fright of her life.
    My hats off to Johnny(opps!), who played the guilt game and it payed off! Now they’re an item! LOL.
    P.s. sorry for the double post, forgot to leave email add 😛

  239. First year of Uni, I fell for this chick I thought was gorgeous back then. I was 85 kilos so I didn’t fancy my chances too much. What did I do? I thought you’d never ask.
    Nothing much, really, I went on to lose 20 kilos by joining the gym and I now have an active lifestyle for 3 years now, and counting. I weigh 65 kilos and feeling more alive than ever.
    If anyone has attempted losing weight, well, he or she would know working off 2 kilos would be a big thing. And then there is this thing about willpower. My advice is, find a motivation. What do you desperate want, and would do anything to get?
    For me, it was her.
    I never did get her in the end, but what I got out of my desperation was health that will stay with me for the rest of my life.
    20 kilos, that’s 2 overweight babies.

  240. an addict?
    this is how i define myself as an addict.
    1.purposely walked from my faculty to her faculty hoping that i would bump into her,but in the end that did not happen because she did not have classes on that day.
    2.purposely did some kinda cool stuff in front of her,in the end looked like an idiotic cock.
    3.overexert myself in front of her during some taekwondo class,in the end pulled myself out coz i was going to blank out.as in pengsan.
    4.went into jewellery shop to get a valentines present,in the end came out with ehem a cheap necklace…high hopes low income…
    5.watched horror movie with her hoping she wud be afraid and cling onto u,cliche huh,but in the end she has got no feel while i’m closing my eyes everytime the music starts getting scary…
    yeap i am an addict…
    🙂

  241. This story is about my friend, let’s call her Kate. She’s mixed parentage and she’s very very pretty.
    It happen when we were in Form 2. Kate had a crush on a Form 1 boy (let’s call him John). John, is very cute looking boy. Even his voice is cute.
    Kate is a very brave girl. She’d go around disturbing him – like suddenly run to him and whack him from behind or tease him. She do everything she can to catch his attention.
    John, on the other hand.. its kinda of a shy guy. He’s definately interested to know Kate, but he’s shy.. and also kinda shocked with Kate’s wildness.
    One day, after school, Kate did her daily routine to disturb John. This time round.. she ran up to him…. and snatch his school bag away from him.
    John : Wei! Ng hou cau ar! Bei fhan ngor ar!(Wei! Don’t run away. Give it back to me!)
    Kate : Lei chui ngor la~~~ (Come chase after me la~)
    And both Kate and John was running around the school. My friends and I, and John’s friend just stood there, look at them… and laugh~
    Then Kate start throwing his bag to us.. making John run left and right and left and right. 5 gals vs 1 guy. Then his friends started to join in our little game.
    John eventually got his bag back.. after many runs in and out of the school. And Kate get what she wants – his attention. Eventually, Kate and our friends, befriend with John’s friend.
    Funny thing was, there was 5 of us girls. And there was 5 guys in John’s gang too.
    Mike was attracted to my friend, Grace. Leon was attracted to me, but I had a crush on Shonny and Shonny was interested in Heather. Boy… it was so messy.
    Anyway, after getting John’s interest and attention, Kate play hard to get. John and Leon are very close friend. While Kate and I stay very near each other.
    During bulan puasa, Kate and I will not take school bus home (we’d use the bus fare to buy Ramadhan food and all) and walk home together. And John and Leon will cycle with us to ‘send’ us home.
    John will cycle next to Kate and Leon cycled next to me. John will talk to us in his broken english… while struggling with his bike. His bicycle make this funny noise *squek *squek* *squek* everytime he paddle. Leon, on the other hand is wayyyyyyyyyyyyyy too shy.
    So.. instead of letting them to follow us home… Kate demanded that both of them cycle in front of us instead. Kate asked John where he stay and ask her show him his house. So, we’ll all go to his house.. after they got down from their bicycle… Kate and I will quickly run off.
    John will struggle, trying to get on his so-much-bigger-than-him bicycle to chase after us. Failing which, John run after us. Leon, just stood there.
    John : Ng hou cau ar~ Ni bu gou wo cau ar! (speaking in both Cantonese and Mandarin – Don’t run~ You cant run faster than me!)
    John.. stop running coz he can’t run anymore. Kate and I stop running. Then Kate go up to him… splash all the water from her bottle on him. Then pinch his face (like how we pinch a baby’s face).
    John was kinda mad. But find it funny at the same time.
    John : You don’t touch my min ar~ (Min = face in cantonese)
    We couldnt help but burst into laughter about him speaking in broken Eng cum Cantonese cum Mandarin.
    After that… they became an item.

  242. these stories are great!! i read them over a span of a few days.
    i liked iwilleatyourpetfrogalive’s story!! it was super funny, but it sounded almost too exaggerated i wondered if it was true tho.nevertheless shes a great writer =)
    too bad i dun have any particular desperate addict stories, nor am i from malaysia..
    kinda feel sorry for all those desperate ppl/stalkers..to others they may be psychotic and despo.. but in their world love is everything..
    may they wake up from their dreams soon =)

  243. During Form 3, there’s this guy in my class which shall be called K for now. K
    was obsess with a girl (known as C) that’s 2 years younger than us. How did he
    get to know she exists? Well, C was performing during assembly once and that’s
    when K said he’s gonna do anything just to be with her.
    K went to investigate about C and found out that C walks home everyday. So, K
    decided to find out C’s house. K told his mom that she doesn’t have to pick him
    up after school anymore because he would find his own transport home. The next
    day and the day after that and also the following day….. K stalks C until her
    house. During curriculum days, K would stay outside of her house just hoping to
    catch a glance of C every now and then. He would also follow C back to school
    when C head back to school for curriculum activities. K stays about 1 hour walk
    from school and he don’t mind doing that everyday just to look at her. K’s
    action was so obvious that K was caught by C’s parents outside K’s house many
    times and whenever C’s parents comes out with a broom/stick/weapon, K runs and
    hides in the drain nearby.
    This is the best part of the story yet, K asked us what are the ways that he
    could get her attention and express his feelings to her. One of my classmate
    told him, why don’t you steal her bag and make it obvious that you did it, so
    she would look for you to get it back, then you get the chance to talk to her.
    K actually went and steal C’s bag. However, the plan turned out horribly wrong!
    Instead of C going to see K herself, she went to the headmistress straight and
    reported the incident. K panic’d and he threw the bag in the guy’s toilet and
    acted as if he didn’t do it. K was barred from school for a week for that!
    When K was back in school again, K didn’t give up. K actually seek for our
    advice again. (Oh, boy!) This time, one of the guy said,’ Why don’t you try
    climb out of the 1st floor class room, stand on the ledge and shout ‘I like
    you, C. Can we be friend? I’m doing this for you!’ and jump off the ledge.
    Well, the crazy K gave it some thought and decided to do it the following week
    assembly. Guess what? K actually did it! K climbed out of the classroom and on
    to the ledge. The teachers and headmistress panic’d and told him not to jump.
    True enough, K didn’t have the ‘coconut’ as large as Kenny’s to jump. The sad
    part is after creating such chaos, K didn’t even announce his love or what he
    went up there to do in the first place! Fire brigate came after a while and got
    him down. Surprisingly, the school didn’t take any action on K, but he got
    grounded.
    There’s was once, K poo’d in his pants during a tuition class. No idea what made
    him do that, but all I know was that K did it and K was forced to wear a pair
    of shorts belonged to the tuition teacher’s husband. (=.=)” How did I know
    about this story you might think? This is all due to K’s intelligent..just
    kidding. K thought it was a good idea to show C that he exists. K went to tell
    everyone in C’s class (inc. C). They laugh their ass off and K made a fool out
    of himself. Somehow, K was satisfied with the outcome knowing that C now know K
    exists. I knew this sounds impossible, but it’s true!
    K didn’t get to know C at the end because K didn’t introduce himself to C….
    That’s the sad truth.
    *All the event above happened in 1 freakin’ year! lol.. It’s funny when I think
    back on it. Anyway, I hope K doesn’t read this blog or else I am dead meat. >_

  244. Reader discretion is advised. This is an R-rated comment.
    He SMSed me earlier with, “Gotta focus. Assignment is worth 30%.. due in 10 hours. I might just fail this unit if I don’t complete it.”
    He suddenly SMSed me again at 5 in the morning saying that he could not concentrate. He saw someone in the computer lab he was working in. She was gorgeous. Tall, slim, with a sporty build, and great skin.
    I SMSed him to STFU, and put my phone on silent.
    “Auburn hair tied up in a ponytail, cute frowning brow, casual knee length skirt, and white spaghetti top. Nice.. I like.”
    And so he schemed.
    It was dawn. He got into his car to get to the nearest early breakfast joint.
    He came back with sandwiches and coffee and then he went over to offer her breakfast.
    Then he noticed that she was watching porn.
    And so this is how it all began. This is how I imagined it to be la, in my head after listening to what he said:
    They would both be watching porn together while having breakfast.
    “Did you know that premature ejaculation affects 1 in 4 men?” She says in an amused tone while biting into a sandwich.
    “Kegels helps.” She mumbles while googling for gay porn. “Your girlfriend would thank you for it.”
    My friend would finally crack and laugh. “You are bold, aren’t you? …accept free breakfast, then randomly recommend me tips on sex.. and you watch porn in Uni… at 6am.. you ought to win some award.”
    “Internet at home is down…” She clicks on a link to another site.
    “… and sexology students are allowed to surf for porn.”
    “Ohh.”
    “Can’t surf porn when there are people around. So have to do it at night lor.”
    “Ohh.”
    Then she says, “Okay la.. I’m actually doing a survey.. on how open the Australian public is on casual conversation on sex.”
    “Gee, err.. great way to go about doing it.. watch porn in uni so that the topic will surely come up in conversation?”
    “Yep. I also have to take down data on how people react to watching porn with an attractive stranger as well.”
    “I see, ingenius.. … So you choose your own topics for this assignment?”
    “Yep.”
    “Cool… you get to watch porn and work at the same time..”
    “Yep.. And get free breakfast.”
    “How many guys have you interviewed for this?”
    “To date, perhaps 20, started a month plus ago. Basically around one every night.”
    So then he looked at her, seized the golden opportunity and said something witty.
    “Gee, I wonder what else you can get from this.. I know all we’re gonna get are sore balls.”
    Klah, good try la hah, not bad la.. give him credit la.. but, he found out that the chick is christian and that she believed in celibacy. GG.
    So anyways, here comes the desperate part. He cannot afford to fail his assignment because fail assignment = fail unit three times = fail degree. But he still spent time with her la.. so that’s considered desperate la right?
    He didn’t have enough time to complete his assignment. He has got way too many extensions in the past. Medical certificates were out of the picture.
    So, our hero went home, wanked, got his jumper, ski cap, gloves, and spray paint for the surveillance cameras.
    Then, he went back to uni and broke the mailbox that you were supposed to hand your assignments into. And took the contents.
    Then the rest is history, the unit controller found out why 70% of the students didn’t submit their assignment.. so basically students then had to resubmit their assignments lor, so he had time to complete his work.
    True story. :O
    My friend “A” just can’t stop thinking about her just because of that mildly sexual encouter..
    He’s semi-stalking her.. getting photos of her, knowing where she lives and her daily activities… so much so that:
    1) he’s now in her church..
    2) he finds ways to be with her.. you see.. church girls who go to uni normally only have enough time to spend with studies and with church people
    The guy goes to the gym regularly now, and reads the bible, and spend hours scheming.. reading relationship books.. thinking of ways to increase his chances of spending more time with her, and striking that balance so that she doesn’t view him as an “addicted desperado.”
    He has all sorts of strategies to end up alone with her.. from study sessions to running out of petrol someplace in Western Australia while getting to some church camp.
    You must be thinking.. after all this work, if he doesn’t get the girl.. he must be either really ugly, or has horrible personality, or she knows his agenda and hates him or something. Its neither.
    They’re now happily married.
    Anyways, give me my LG chocolate phone, thanks Kenny 🙂

  245. hey kenny a fan of ur blog..
    just came across the title of this blog makes me think of my dad.. not to say that winning the prize matter wat matters that i think of my dad phone. the LG chocolate phone my brother own one too.. my younger brother using a W810i Sony Ericsson .. me myself using samsung phone which cost my dad a big buck buying me that phone.. is about last two week my daddy spent almost two thousand to fullfil the urge of both his daughter and son need to change phone. However i look back at my dad phone today.. he is using a old age nokia phone which has yellow light which he brought back in the year 2001. After 5 years i think my dad deserve to have to change a new elegent phone like LG White Chocolate Phone. I hope that i would win the LG White Chocolate K810 phone as a birthday present to my dad end of this month. Well i guess my chance of winning is rather low.. well for my dad birthday present i just put down a gamble in it.. Maybe there is better winner but make sure everyone is happy… chiao..~

  246. Ok this story is all the way from sydney. In a particular uni here, a Girl from China had the hots for one of my Sporean Guy friend. And when flirting with him did not get his attention, she did the next best thing. She bought a “pat lok” (the same car in initial d) and “hired” him to be her driver! i mean which guy could resist that?
    So they spent a lot of time “driving” her around from school to Chatswood and what not. Soon of course the guy’s heart melted for her “big bank account” she would often brag about. (she’d brag about owning a multinational company and buying a evo-9 before it was launched).
    So they started dating, and everytime they had an argument, she’d get “kidnapped” and everyone would go frantic trying to find her. no one could reach her mobile, but as soon as he called she’d turn up and say her kidnappers let her go!
    She went to great lengths just to get his attention. She even offered to find his dad a job in her “company” in Sydney.
    The last straw blew when the dad came all the way to Sydney to find out that the “position” had been filled.
    Up till today, no one knows if she really has a company or her real financial status. All of us have a laugh when we think back, the only conclusion is that regardless of how much money she has, she wasted a great deal in trying to impress the wrong guy

  247. oh my god..
    what stupidness..
    you desperate LG white Chocolate winning wannabe’s really need to stop..
    if you have a freaking hillarious story to tell,, fine,, go ahead.. nobody’s gonna shock you with an electric stick and or try to stab you with a plastic knife.. we ALL appreciate your humour..
    for example,, that “hehe” guy.. about the burger
    so FREAKING funny please!!
    *excuse me while i laugh the living daylights out of myself*
    HAHAHAHHAHAHAHAHAHAHHAHAHAHHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHH!!!
    *thank you*
    anyway,,
    but WHAT THE HELL?!!
    some of you just totally have NO sense of humour..
    so boring.. read until fall asleep also can.. SIAO!!
    and you still expect kenny to give you that LG white chocolate you always wanted..
    you know what i think?
    GO JUMP OFF A BUILDING!!
    i know you also think that your story was terrible okay.. *shakes head* *rolls eyes*
    so,, you decide to think of a plan that might somehow convince kenny to let you win that phone althought your story is fucking boring by saying….
    “oh my gaaaawd kenny!! i LOoOoOoOVE your blog!! i’m your BIGGEST fan!! please let me win!! PLEEEEEEEEEAAAAAAAAAAAAAAASSSSSSSSSSEEEEEEEEEEEEE!!!”
    FUCK THAT!!
    you think kenny will give you that LG phone just because you said that?!
    if you really did,, this just concludes you are a totall dumbass!!
    people usually have *SOME* sense of humour even if they are like a living obituary…
    so dont expect people to laugh at your pathetic attempt to be funny..
    GAWD!!
    this society is just a state of damnation!!
    SHEESH!!
    this has been written *politely* and sincerely by me,,
    xia yu
    (for you non-chinese understanding people,, xia yu here means blind fish)

  248. i once got so fedup of my bf’s friends that i wanted to get far far away from them.. so i used my birthday money and i also borrowed some money from my friends.. told the biggest lie on earth to my parents and dragged my bf all the way to bali for 3 days @_@ just to be alone with him where his friends cant get to him.. HUHUHUHU
    and once we broke up but we still did couple like stuff…
    so one day all of a sudden he hugged me really really tightly and said..
    “i can imagine you in a wedding dress. you would look so perfect as my wife”
    blah blah blah… which resulted in us having sex..
    and he hates the fact that i hate condoms but this time he came inside me on an extremely dangerous date because there was a huge chance i would get pregnant.. which like NEVER happens cuz he’s always scared that im gonna get pregnant..
    this surprised me so i asked him why..
    he then answered
    “i want you to get pregnant so you will have to be with me forever”
    @_@

  249. I once had a friend, P, who was a couple of years older than me. P was the kind of person who was always desperate to be in the centre of attention. If anyone had a new and better phone, his had to be newer and better. If anyone bought a new car, he would trade his in for a newer one.
    Now P wasnt very rich and his parents worked hard to make a living. They owned a little business that made sold cakes and other deserts. P had a friend named J, who was his high school friend. One day, J bought a new car and showed it to P. P immediately got jealous at the sight of the car and started scolding J for showing off. He then stormed off without a word. P didnt have much money left so he started stealing money from his parents account which included the money for his university cost. He then sold his old car- a proton wira and bought a new mercedes. His parents were shocked to discover a new mercedes and were even more shocked to find out that they barely had any money left. Sad to say, P didnt go to the university of his choice, let alone any university. His parents made him work in the cake shop after his college.
    *Names have been changed to hide the identity*

  250. When I was in form 3, there was a form 5 guy in which we shall know as P who was my classmate’s brother who liked, loved and was completely obssesed with this girl, we shall know her as S… up till today, we all still think P’s mentally unstable because…
    My school blocks are designed in such a way that they all end up surounding a sort of “courtyard” that’s in the middle of the blocks… on valentine’s day of my form 3 year, I came to school to find red writing and rose petals all over that “courtyard” and we all thought some psycho ex-student came back for revenge but when we got up to our classes we saw that the words read “P LOVE S FOREVER AND EVER!!!” I remember it to this day because it was so damn funny… next thing you know, during morning announcements, a strange, unknown voice goes across saying “S this is P…. *insert heart warming love speech*”…. it was quite a long speech as I remember it to be until they got to him and he hurriedly ended with “I love you S, I love you, I love you, I love you…….” and then the headmistress’ voice took over ordering us back to class…. we went in laughing our heads off….
    gossips later in the day revealed that P stole the keys to the PA room, sneaked into school at 4am, prepared everything, wrote everything with spray paint, rose petals and all and waited in the PA room until he was sure school was in session and then made his “heart warming declaration of love”… he even locked himself in for extra time with the mic… such a psycho!
    he got suspended and he was made to cement the “courtyard” over… which he did… but some time after that he wrote the same thing on it again… and he was suspended again, cement over… and he did it AGAIN!! finally he got “buang sekolad-ed” and my classmate, P’s sister told us that he went on to some school in setapak…. and then we never saw him again….
    years later we all discover that he’s a teakwando blackbelt and can break down doors without any effort…. upon receiving this piece of information, S and her family migrated to Australia and we never saw her ever again… we never saw P ever again either… but we still think he’s a psycho… 🙂
    *
    I’m not psycho enough to run around any place naked… but I really really really really really really really really really really really really really really really really really really really really really really really really really really really really really REALLY REALLY REALLY WANT THAT PHONE!!!!!!!!!! (I typed that out, no copy paste nonsence… which shows just how much I want it… really really really REALLY!!! badly!!!)
    and that story was seriously true… another guy banged down a science lab door with his head because a girl woudln’t come out of the lab to talk to him… he banged, banged, banged until she came out and then he fainted with blood “leaking” from his brain…. ew…. another guy ran around and around and around the school field until the girl came and grabed him to stop…. yea, my school full of psychos… no, I’m not one of them….

  251. This stranger pops up at a cafe while I’m with friends and introduces himself as a street magician. He performs magic tricks on us. He then leaves and returns with a large laminated newspaper article of himself from theStar Section Two in an attempt to impress (he later confessed it was to impress me) and bestowed us VIP tickets to a magazine’s anniversary party at a club. One ticket (we later discovered) had a number scrawled on the back of it and was addressed to “the girl in red” which (ho-hum) happens to be me. Sheer stupidity and naivete prompted me to actually call that number and I ended up going on a date with him. After nearly harrassing me on a park bench (his idea of impressing was to show me his favourite gargantuan elephant statue outside a hotel and telling me a very ridiculous story about it) by coming so close I almost fell off. Ending my short holiday in KL, I get ready to go back to Penang when lo-and-behold, he’s on hte same bus as me, sitting next to me. He then takes me out on a date in Penang at one of the most expensive restaurants in town to treat me on a more-than-RM100-meal and spends an impossible amount on a Gold Class movie ticket in an attempt to woo me. He then barrages into the shop I work in to sneakily talk to my then colleagues to (I quote:) find out more about them and presumingly to ward them off me. He then makes several more trips to Penang, attempting to ambush me in my workplace (failing so when I manage to run to the office to hide).
    Next up would be a 13 or 14 year old teenager (I’m 5 years older than the fella and I wonder if he actually noticed it) who approaches my table at a fast food outlet and strikes a very I’m-trying-desperately-to-be-cool pose before asking me “Ni you tian hua ma?” directly translated to English – do you have a phone?. I politely declined and when I left, a friend noticed him and two of his ‘cronies’ trailing me all the way up the escalator. He confronts them and they run off but the moment he leaves me, I find them trailing me once more to the car park. I call up another friend who asks them to beat it and they run off again.
    At my old workplace, there was a man, in his 30s or 40s. He was not a customer as he never bought anything but only stood at the shelves opposite the cashier counter to stare at me almost every day (and when I say stare, I mean stare in a really really unpleasant and almost perverted manner). Once after being creeped out of my wits, I decided to hide under the counter, my colleagues covering for me. Much to my dismay, he approaches one end of the counter and notices me sitting on the floor. He then stared at me from over the counter, mouth agape as usual, for a couple of minutes before my colleague came back to tell him off, sending him scampering away.
    Then again, there was the customer who’d come in to buy a CD (or enquire/order them) almost every week a month after I started working just so he could stand at the counter and persuade me to go out with him for a cup of coffee or give him my number.
    Unfortunately, I didn’t make any of those up. Trust me, I wish I did. I’m not exactly Ms. Desperate Addict when it comes to the boys but the only thing I’m desperate for now is that creamy white LG White Chocolate phone so I can discard my useless and forever breaking down Sony Ericsson. Being the sweet tooth that I am, I never ever refuse anything chocolatey
    Do I pass?

  252. U asked for this, Kenny. 100% real.
    A real life situation of a person who is very desperate.
    I really want LG White Chocolate to replace my sony ericsson k700i. I am desperate for LG White Chocolate Phone
    I am desperate for LG White Chocolate Phone
    I am desperate for LG White Chocolate Phone
    I am desperate for LG White Chocolate Phone
    I am desperate for LG White Chocolate Phone
    I am desperate for LG White Chocolate Phone
    I am desperate for LG White Chocolate Phone
    I am desperate for LG White Chocolate Phone
    I am desperate for LG White Chocolate Phone
    I am desperate for LG White Chocolate Phone
    I am desperate for LG White Chocolate Phone
    I am desperate for LG White Chocolate Phone
    I am desperate for LG White Chocolate Phone
    I am desperate for LG White Chocolate Phone
    I am desperate for LG White Chocolate Phone
    I am desperate for LG White Chocolate Phone
    I am desperate for LG White Chocolate Phone
    I am desperate for LG White Chocolate Phone
    I am desperate for LG White Chocolate Phone
    I am desperate for LG White Chocolate Phone
    I am desperate for LG White Chocolate Phone
    I am desperate for LG White Chocolate Phone
    I am desperate for LG White Chocolate Phone
    I am desperate for LG White Chocolate Phone
    I am desperate for LG White Chocolate Phone
    I am desperate for LG White Chocolate Phone
    I am desperate for LG White Chocolate Phone
    I am desperate for LG White Chocolate Phone
    I am desperate for LG White Chocolate Phone
    I am desperate for LG White Chocolate Phone
    I am desperate for LG White Chocolate Phone
    I am desperate for LG White Chocolate Phone
    I am desperate for LG White Chocolate Phone
    I am desperate for LG White Chocolate Phone
    I am desperate for LG White Chocolate Phone
    I am desperate for LG White Chocolate Phone
    I am desperate for LG White Chocolate Phone
    If that is not desperate enough….aha!!!This will do:
    “I LOVE KENNYSIA.COM”
    iiiiii
    l oo l
    ——
    ll
    —————————
    l l l l l l
    l l l l l l
    l l l . . l l l
    l l l l l l
    l l l l l l
    l l l l l l
    l l l l l l
    l l l l l l
    l l l l l l
    l l l————l l l
    l l l l–l l l l
    llll l l l l llll
    l l–l

  253. I had this friend who was so obssessed over some chick, he counts every day, hour and second that they are apart (they live in different states), to the excess that he even knows her menstrual cycle!
    So, yea, on the day her uterus is supposed to disintegrate into…(use your imagination), he will give her a call and remind her to bring along her sanitary towel out with her and to not take in any cold drinks (apparently, the chick herself is not that keen on her own monthly menses timing).

  254. Well, this is about one of my friend. She have a huge crash on a guy who are the same class as mine.(Let’s call this guy MR A). MR A is a nice looking guy who has a lot of admirer.My friend just try to act mean to MR A just to attract MR A attention. At the same time, she tries to seduce him.
    One day, I stay back after school for duty. When I finish my duty, I walk down from the stair case (my class is on the 2nd floor). I saw my friend and MR A walked out from the ladies W.C. I didn’t take any action but in my heart, I knew that something had happen.
    After a month, something serious happened. My friend suddenly didn’t turn up to the class for 3 days. Me and few of the classmates feel worried about her so we went to her house to visit her. Just then we knew that she has some infection on her vagina. The funniest part is her mother believe that she get the infection because she went to the public toilet, which is dirty and in bad condition. I knew something happen between two of them.
    After few days, she came back to school. As I knew that she need to use more than 10 minutes every time she went to toilet (she need to apply all those medicine and bla bla bla.) and I also knew that she has the habit of writing diary. I did some bastard thing. I search her bag for her diary when she went to toilet.
    When I read her diary, I nearly puke my breakfast out. She wrote every detail about what they did in the toilet. (You can imagine what they did in the toilet). She wrote about how big the stuff is, how she handle it… In her diary, she said that she is willing to do everything just to make MR A happy (including having sex with him.). She’s so desperate about having a relationship with MR A.
    Now we’re not friend anymore because she knew that I read her diary and she’s angry with me. MR A went to study in KL not long after the incident.
    Well, hope you can understand my words because my english level is quite low. (P.S. this is a real story. Why girls always make themselves seems like too available? Didn’t they realised that boy only treat them as one of the booty call in their life?)

  255. I drew. I drew and I drew and I drew.
    I had notebooks,workbooks,scrap paper filled with my attempts to make her be a part of me, that somehow by committing my feelings unto something tangible, it brings fantasy much closer to reality.
    Those drawings were not of her front profile. They were not copied from a photo clipping secretly cut out from her schoolbook, and no,they were definately not sexual.
    Those drawings depicted her at an angle from her back, slanting a little to her right,with her elbows on the table.
    Why?
    Because that’s how i see her most of the time, sitting in 3, 4 rows front of me in Principles of Accounts tuition classes.Some people may deem it sad and pathetic,and in retrospect, maybe it is. But when you are young and “in love”,sanity goes out of the window.
    Well,my sanity wasn’t the only one with suicidal tendencies. No, I didn’t try to commit suicide, but my friends did say I just should, if I m going to let my education go to waste over someone so unattainable, a mirage that will never come to be.Their lack of encouragement was justifiable, seeing how I flunked in monthly exams, and getting caught by the tuition teacher (who took the liberty in predicting that I will not even get a credit for his subject in SPM) with a pencil in my hand over a half drawn picture of her.
    It was a year of ploughing through emotional wreckage before the curtain came down abrubtly on my solo performance. I finally managed to muster up some courage to whimper an invitation to “bowling-date” to her, she accepted but didn’t turn up, and got steady with someone else from my school a few weeks later.
    Funny how things turn out.I got over her, got an A1 for P.A.,got a Finance Degree and got a job teaching clients double entries and accouing standards.Guess the desperation for wanting at least one thing good to come out from that tuition class led me the life I have now.
    The irony of this lil tale? I met the love of my life in my college while studying for my degree.
    By the way,I am really good at drawing,and have a drawing of my current flame (aforementioned love of my life) pasted on the wall above the computer monitor.A front profile of her face.Smiling.At me.
    So now I say, desperation is relative.It’s both and neither good or bad.

  256. Every night I sit in front of my computer screen and scroll through the comments on this page. I’ve tried to think of a desperate moment in my life and heck, looks like I’ve never been really desperate. So I come back regularly only to read, to laugh about, what people have to say as I found it amusing and sweet at the same time.
    What I didn’t realise was as I read those comments was that a desperate addict has come alive in me. What am I desperate for?
    I am desperate to have stories half as romantic and sweep-me-off-my-feet type to tell.
    I am desperate to have a guy place a ring in my McDonald’s burger to ask for my hand in marriage.
    I am desperate for someone who would lit 700 candles in the park just to impress me.
    I am desperate for a guy who would trigger the school alarm just to spend some quality time with me.
    *The above are all taken and improvised from comments posted.
    Truth is, I’ve never been swept off my feet in that way. It was always over the phone or the computer. Never once was I pampered when I was in his presence. So much that I made a promise to myself that if ever a guy were to do anything close to desperate, I’d take him in right away.
    Right now, being single only makes me even more desperate because that slight chance of it happening is zero. If I were to be with a guy right now, at least I could hint in a way perhaps that I would like thisthat to happen but the fact that I don’t have anyone further minimizes the chance of it happening. Now, not only am I desperate for some desperado to make me feel happy, I’m desperate to be loved.
    What do you do when you’re desperate to be loved? You chat, you flirt. This is when Friendster comes into full use. But you and I both know. Mr. Right doesn’t have an account.
    *sigh*

  257. My sister has been dissing Ah Bengs her entire life and she is currently dating one.
    Why?
    Unattainable more desirable.
    He was rude and arrogant and attached. But ask her if she is truly in love, she said yes, she is smitten and wishes that she and him were joined at the hip.
    She is so addicted to him that she has started to tolerate (not listen to) hardcore “fengtau” techno when i know she absolutely dispises the beat.
    I swear she cringes everytime he revs his Evolution wannabe, but puts on a “your-car-is-so-cool” face.
    She has given up ticket to Black Eyed Peas just to see him immitate Raikonnen on the race tracks.
    She has started to make-believe that eating with her mouth open is a new Asian culture, to show that the food is extremely yummyzone, just like he does.
    She has decided that Manglish is her new language when speaking to his friends. Who speaks English properly anymore?
    She has given up on finding the clear spot to kiss on his pimply face. Now she can bloody well kiss his zits!
    The sight of him picking his nose doesn’t gross her out anymore. Now she’ll gladly hand him a tissue.
    My sister is blind. Wait a minute, I don’t have a sister. I’m the only child.
    I was talking about myself. *Cringe*

  258. ok my story is about this girl in my high school who is a hardcore desperate addict.she’s addicted to boys…who unfortunately regard her as the worst kind of poison.kinda sad but nthg wrong with that by itself.unfortunately she thinks that she’s a “boy magnet”.right.
    so let’s call her A.A is really into this guy B who already has a gf.one day she got B’s hp no frm somewhere and gave him a call.
    A:”hello sayang.this is A.you know me right?”
    B:”owh hi…”
    they chatted for a while la.dunno about what.
    then the “best” part of the convo…
    A:”aiya why so long i never see you edi?i shaved my pussy specially for you you know…..so many guys want me but i choose you,you should feel honoured.”
    B:*shocked* *hangs up*
    all this happened in form 1.now having sex in form 1 is not exactly shocking anymore but thus coming from her somehow has a very strangely amusing quality about it.needless to say the phone convo story spread around soon enough.

  259. now i shall talk about my own desperate addict story.this time i’m the desperate addict.well co-desperate addict la.cuz got 2 desperate addicts.
    quite embarrassing but now when i think about it quite funny.
    on the first day of form 5 accounts tuition, me and this girl i used to talk to,C, noticed that 2 new guys joined our tuition.me and C have been therre since form 4.anyway the two guys E and F were both quite ugly but for some reason both me and C thought that E was very hot.fine.anyway all of us had to write our name and contact no on this piece of paper for teacher so she can call us or smthg if got extra class/class cancelled..that kinda shit la.the paper was passed around the whole class.then the next day,C told me in school that F smsed her,apparently he got her no from the paper la.being the desperate addict i am i asked C to korek E’s number for me from F.the next day she gave me some handphone no.when i smsed him no reply.so tak kisah la.then C would tell me all her sms convos with E and stuff.fine.
    then in tuition they also like best buddies edi.so sometimes i will campur into their convos but most of the time i jadi lamp post.so sad for me but whatever.after 2 weeks or so me and E kinda friends edi.so i asked E for his number la.the number he gave me was totally different from the number C gave.so maybe he changed his number.dunno.
    so i started smsing him in proper now.then one day i was telling him a story about someone’s gatal maid(dunno why la.so random) and he said that C is very innocent and stuff.i was like” yesar?how you know?” then he told me that C asked him what was a blowjob and stuff cuz she didnt know or smthg.then i was like “owhhhh..” then E was like “she say you were talking to her about some blowjob.she say you very pakar in this kinda thing.” wth!!that mcb C trying to make me sound like some skanky ho kot and act all vute and innocent in front of E =.= . then i noticed one day he had this me-to-you keychain on his pencil box.you know those keychains with 2 halves.usually bf/gf punya la.each person one half.anyway C used to have that exact same keychain on her pencilbox which disappeared till recently.so i asked E where did he get that keychain from.he said C gave it to him.wow.then everytime E will ponteng around 1 hr of tuition to play dota in the cafe nearby.of course C will teman him la and both will come in late together.and she will always come extra early to teman him eat dinner in the mamak beside.he has chem tuition before this mar,so stay back lor.aihhh…
    as for me, i would buy linkin park badges for him to put on his bag and stuff,cuz he likes badges and linkin park.i also bought him choc during his birthday.all this is a very big deal for me cuz my pocket money then was only a measly rm 40 a month.the badges alone edi rm 10 for 3.starve for 1 week.i also purposely sit beside him in tuition.with C on his otehr side =.= .
    by now me and C were already in a cold war.very obvious cold war.so the whole tuition center already knows about this whole issue.i bet we were prolly the source of entertainment then la.my god.now since me and C weren’t on talking terms anymore i obviously had found new friends to teman me in tuition la.i was closest to this girl D.D knew this other girl P from another bm tuition and P joined our tuition for like 3 months.so one day without my knowledge P told the whole story about me,C and E to her friend Z(this story quite a lot of watak.i hope you dont have a headache by now ^_^” ).then one day Z asked for my number from P for some weird reason.so thats how i got to know Z till today.
    soon i became a desperate addict for Z.still am today >_

  260. This is my most embarrasing story and here it goes.
    I was in a trnsport vehicle to the mall that was full of people inside.And I saw this car it was a BMW Z3 and me and everyone else saw it(unfortunately) .I was him staring at it when our transport stopped in the robots.
    Before I continue with what happened afterwards.
    I was flirting with this fine brother sitting not to far from me.
    So I thought to myself i’d impress him, and I started shouting out loud(to show how I love and know cars, since most guys like girls who know cars.)” WOW! WOW! LOOK EVERYONE THAT’S MY FUTURE CAR … IT’S THE NEW Z9, I JUST ADORE IT”
    Everyone including the fine brother started laughing at me. I was so emarrased.
    I excepted the fact that I know nothing about cars and that it was a BMW Z3 and not a ‘Z9’.I still like him but I don’t think he feels the same way.

  261. i walk around the mall talking into a bar of cadbury’s. i also take pictures of hot guys with it, and anything else that interests me. it has a monokuro boo keychain hanging from its right corner.
    of course i don’t do that..who am i kidding..
    though, i was wondering, why are you giving the LG phone away? its weird, smart people keep good things for themselves..but someone once told me, sharing is caring. that was when he wanted some of my biscuits.

  262. i’m not really one of kennysia.com fans as well but i do log in sometimes for some fun stuff browse or coz maybe bloggging still kind of new stuff for me therefore i might not really knew wat to do to win such a cute n lovely hp as well .. but i do like to share sthg over here since its not really suitable for me to post over my own blog.
    i met someone 4yrs ago then i do proceed to tell him i love him and he do tell me that he love me too .. sound lucky and blissful isnt it ? i felt that too ..
    but when time pass we seem like remain as fren, i do asked for drinks,movie,concert or even dinner but so sad not such of them happened due to both of us was BUSY??
    then i found sthg .. there is lots out sider issue he considered to get along with me .. shouldnt love just be love ?? why guys loves to think that much huh ?? therefore i felt that n he did meant that even we love each others but it seem we still hard to reach or go toward our future..
    when days pass finanlly i found it should be an end for me not to keep waiting him anymore since it almost 4yrs and seem only me tried to work it out and so curious did he ??
    love will only works when both side tried to work out isnt it ? i wont anyone even god let me met v a coward for not get along with me but just felt abit sad that we unable to work it out.
    and during this period of time , the more addict thing is the sms-ing, doesnt human nowadays do msg-ing lot?? hee~~ we did dat too .. i like to save all the sms received and sent been save in my hp and thanks god that i did bought the right hp last yr since the storage is big.
    and the msg-ing records break during jun/06 till recently we finally drop the “BREAK” for not work out anymore .. jz guess how many sms storage do u think in my hp have for around 1 yrs time ??
    .
    .
    .
    .
    .
    .
    its 1500+ .. seriously.. but almost 80% was sent by me.. *_*
    dunno why i felt sms will easy to send our cares to the others, dont your felt that too rather than keep talking especially the rate was damn cheap nowadays??
    dats the most desperate addict from me to him ..
    so when the time to forget , its time for me to change a new handset and here i found a place with some free gadget so just wrote it and tried my luck .. but seem my luck was dat bad for almost 4yrs its seem hard that i can win it with this funny and lot broken english stuff huh ?? nvm ..at least found somewhr for me to wrote sthg rather than posting it @ my own blog…. thx anyway ..

  263. i was a lovestruck teenage girl. (still am!)
    he was the hottest soccer player in the school team!
    one of the MANY insane things i did was to go ard stadium-hopping in the west-side of singapore just to ‘bump’ into this guy and to watch him train, kicking balls, and looking all hot and sweaty in that red jersey of his of course!
    everyone knew he plays for a local socal-club but i had no idea where the club trained exactly. determined, and most posibly possesed, i managed to persuade a girl buddy to follow me on mission #101; to find the exact location of his trainings. we started with the most obvious place – the stadium which had the same name as the football club, but upon reaching the stadium, my heart broke to find out that the team no longer trains there. undetered, we took a train down to the west-est stadium in sg. from a distance, we saw players kicking soccer balls in the air and we were sooo excited we nearly fainted! squealing and giggling we ran closer but was again disapointed cos it was not his club. we proceeded to another stadium in close proximity. again we got our hopes high as we saw a banner for a soccer club from afar.. we couldnt realy see the logo or the club name on the banner, but we thought, this must be it! it has to be! we ran n ran but alas, it wasnt! 3rd stadium and counting, we were out of cash on our ezlinks and on hand. so we actualy walked all the way to our 4th stadium about 3 mrt stations away. by this time, we were realy dead tired and exhausted but our eyes light up as bright as the floodlights that were switched on at that time. this MUST be it!guess what……
    they were still not there!
    in the end, after numerous bus trips, mrt rides, endless walking and at least 6 stadiums later, we decided to call it a day..
    .
    .
    .
    .
    well not before we dropped by his block and took a picture of his lift and post box! oh and we even counted up the levels of his block just to see what kind of underwear he wears! cant believe i was even blushing when i did that!
    i was realy desperate for this hot mamat and boy was i willing to do anything, even go anywhere for him! if i dont sound like a desperate addict, i wonder who else does!
    p/s if u dont believe me, i still have the pics of his block/mailbox etc.. a waste we didnt spot any hot gstrings hanging out from his flat! heh
    oh and i do have a malaysian add.! 🙂

  264. I was one fat girl and I never had a boyfriend even well into my twenties. Naturally, i dreamed of having boyfriends, holding hands and all that stuffs that normal gals do, Unless, you are not normal and happen to be a lesbian. One fateful year, history took a major turn and changed my life. I was around 23 years old at that time and this guy showed up at my work place. He took one look at me and decided we are meant to be together for all eternities. Okay, okay, so I was fat with all that extra flab and i should be damn grateful that a guy should find me fascinating. He was slim and average looking. Hey, not too bad a catch for someone like me. But hell, no! I thought he was one creepy guy. Even the devil himself couldn’t do a better job at freaking me out. The first stalking began (hmmm, i sound like a celebrity, eh?) when i went to watch a movie with my sis and her friend. When the movie ended, i was shocked to find the dude waiting for me right outside. My sis and her friend laughed their bloody ass off. At other times, coming home from work, i would find him waiting for me not too far off from my home. I had to make detours several times, using different a route to get back home (meaning i sneak into my home using the backyard). Eventually, he decided to wait for me outside my work place. Talk about making things miserable for me. Eventually, i decided to give the poor desperate guy a chance by granting him one date. During that date, he ordered my drink for me without even asking me what I wanted to drink. Talk about sensitivity! On the way home, he put my hand on the car gear, he then placed his hand over mine and he changed gear with our hands in that postion. And stupid old me didn’t even had the nerves to take my hand away. And he was already talking about marriage on that first date. Eeewwww! Anyway, i tried to avoid Mr. Desperado after that. But he kept calling me up at my home (mind you, i never gave him my home phone no. – my not so bright colleague did). A little more than a year later, he told me he decided to go work in West Malaysia cause I have rejected him and he cannot take the pain. Wow! That’s the best news I have heard in a whole year. Alleluia! Alleluia! ***Angels singing*** Even after he left, he make regular calls and sent cards to remind me of his existence. Some 13 years on, he was still making phone calls to me (even though I told him i now have a boyfriend – yeah, good ol’ me slimmed down a little and got myself a bf). Talk about a life long devotion. The only consolation for me was that he was far away and wasn’t waiting around for me near my home and the likes. Thankfully, he has not called me for the last 3 years. Priase the Lord!!!!! He’s probably found someone new to shower his devotion upon.

  265. Nothing of the desperate/besotted lover story I see but here goes, Kenny.
    I think it’s safe to say that guys are seldom put to the “desperation” test when it comes to dressing for an occasion. Shirt, pants, accesorize and you’re on your way. Boy was I wrong!!!
    Queue to my company’s Annual Dinner and Dance. This was going to be BIG mind you. Everyone was going all out in the fashion dept. Me, I got my suit tailored like 6 months before. So I figured, no sweat. I’ll just take a shower, shave, dash on some cologne and then put on the suit and voila…nothing to it right.
    WRONG! I had gone on this strict no lunch and low carb diet during those 6 months, after the suit was tailored and somewhat shrunk. I stared at myself in the mirror in dismay. It looked like I was wearing my dad’s suit or some passed-on thingie from my brother’s wardrobe. Worst of all, my pants kept falling of my waist/butt to the floor. This was even after I tightened my belt to the maximum notch possible. Arghhhhh!!! There was no time to alter it nor did I have anything else to wear. Word of advice to you guys out there before a biggie event, do try on your suits etc a week to see if it needs altering or you need a new wardrobe.
    Here I am 4 hours away from D-Day…DESPERATE to join in on the once in a year festivities, I took what seemed like THE most desperate measure I have ever in my entire life. I put on another pair of thick shorts over my undies…and then I stepped into my tailored pants. Slapped on the belt again and then strut in front of the mirror. It looked like I had a mini-umbrella in my pants, but it kept the pants where it should 😀 So this is how Ronald McDonald feels with his pants on @_@
    Did a few squats, just in case, to see if everything was “safe”. Oh well, better to look like Mr. Umbrella Pants than miss out on the dinner right. Overall, I still enjoyed my night, but had to sneak of to the gents to give my lil “bro” a breather once in a while. It was a relieve when it finally came off after a long “desperate” night.
    So there. My “desperate” story spawned from a “desperate” situation.

  266. [might as well try my luck.. to kenny bet u’ve read tons of stories until ur eyes n neck sore]
    it was back then when i was in primary school..i was a naive, silly looking, nerdy, geeky, u know those kind of girls where with HUGE specs terrible teeth structure and messy hair girls..that’s me!.. there’s this guy who’s known the most ‘goofy-est’ guy.. if he’s deperate he’ll drive u nuts..Let’s call him Mr.E
    so one noon right after our classes.. i have no idea why suddenly Mr.E approached my best friend Sue whispering to her.. both looking at me.. with huge big eyes staring right into me.. i saw Sue’s face changed into a ‘hilarious’ one while Mr.E changed into ‘desperate’ one.. then i knew something was not right.. since both Sue and Mr.E are child hood friends.. they’re both super close..
    Sue then giving me hand sign language.. i was totally blur looking at both different weird expression.. then finally Sue shouted at me “Sharon..!! Mr.E loves you!!” i was like (o.O) blur and shock.. totally.. imagine u’re an invisible + nerdy + geeky + blurry girl and suddenly the ‘clown’ of the school likes you..
    definately i was shocked.. felt like my heart just came our from it’s place and i stood there being totally shocked.. Sue then grabbed my hand and both of us ran away as fast as can away from Mr.E.. heard Mr.E calling for me.. “sharon sharon no no don’t run..i love u..i love u” i was soo scare nearly wanted to cry..
    We ran until we ended up behind the school where we thought we lost him.. Sue comfort me.. saying it’s nothing but a joke..
    for at least an hour we waited until i’m calm and everything was cleared.. with Sue’s confidience and me being myself again.. we marched out from our hiding place and prepare to go back.. while waiting for our cars.. to our terror Mr.E re-appear and i tried to hide behind this huge noticed board but i guessed my luck ran out.. he saw me.. and guessed what he did..
    he came to me and kneeled infront of me and everyone else.. my jaw dropped and he sang “Pretty woman.. walking down the street.. pretty woman..” i was like ‘Ohh my God’ what the hell happened here..my ‘bulu roma’ stood up.. made me terribly afraid of him so i ran as fast as i could from him again.. when he stood up wanted to chase me.. his dadi was there.. his dad saw the whole scene.. i peep from my hiding place and blood filled my entire face blush heavily.. while Mr.E looked as if he’s gonna get nagged from his dad.. and from that day on wards i was afraid of him.. UNTIL now.. !!
    even though we are still friends and do keep in touch.. but still that horror event happened to me.. makes me not to be TOO close to him.. scary things mite happen like before.. still fear him though and what’s worse is that i’ll shut my ears when i hear “PRETTY WOMAN” song!!

  267. hmm…this make think of her(the one that i love so much)….
    alright,is like this..
    the first time i met this girl is when i’m form 3(2005)..because this girl is so pretty…i felt so scared and shy when i see her..and after that day,i don’t know why i kept thinking of her and eager to see her again,cause she is just too pretty…of course,i really want to know this girl,but i’m just too scared to talk to her whenever i have the chance to see her…
    things became a lot better until the beginning of this year,cause she is my classmate for form 4 and 5…
    i felt so happy at the first day of school when i saw her come into my class with her bag,but…i still have that scary feeling and feel so shy when she came near to me,and i also don’t dare to ask my friend to help her,cause you know,i scared this will make me “sia soi”…
    until one day,something very stupid but effective idea came into my mind(if i felt so scared to talk to her in order to know her,why don’t i use the internet to know her??,so i won’t feel scared and shy)so that day after school,i went home and hope to find a chance to find her profile in friendster,afer searching for almost all my friends’ friends in friendster,i felt so happy when suddenly i saw her picture appear in one of my friends’friends list and was overjoy when i saw her profile,she even put her hotmail(msn messenger) address in her profile,then i quickly add her in msn and hope that one day she will online in msn…
    since that day,i online everyday as long as i’m in the house
    until one night,she finally online in msn messenger,i tell her who i am and we starting to chat,but the thing is i’m still scared…scare to tell her that i love her,so every time we chat,we chat about school stuff and anything else,except for the “love” topic…
    ~the end~
    my story is not that crazy about girls like other boys,cause you know,i’ too scared….but i hope you will enjoy reading it!!
    wish you have a great sucess in your career!

  268. Once upon a time, there was this girl and boy who goes to the same college. Girl car pools to college. Therefore she reaches college at ungodly hours and has to wait years before any of her classes actually starts. Actually let’s rephrase that. She has to wait years before ANYTHING opens. The library, the study room, classrooms, canteen, computer lab etc will only open when the sun comes up. Girl has no place to go, so she waits in the staffroom with the lecturer who fetched her there. (Maybe this will give you a better picture, there’s nobody there at that time of day. Only the two of them. Not even the cleaners were there yet – yes the lecturer’s crazy) Finally, a student arrives. It is said boy. He came into the staff room to ask the lecturer about some stuff he din’t understand. Boy stares at girl. Girl smiles politely. Boy gets HIGH for some reason and tries to impress girl. Girl paid no attention whatsoever. Then from that day onwards, boy starts to stalk girl. Boy comes to college at ungodly hours just so he can catch a glimpse of girl. Boy follows girl secretly when she’s walking around due to boredom. (and thinks she din’t know) One day, Boy starts bumping into girl on purpose and says: “Oh, what a coincidence!” When obviously he knows that she will be there at that time. Boy wakes up real early everyday just to spend time with girl. Girl thinks he’s stupid for sacrificing precious sleep time. Boy starts looking at girl’s timetable and (secretly) memorising it. Then he looks in girl’s bag n memorises everything the girl has in it. Boy is addicted to Girl. Then… On the next day, Boy is seen with the EXACT same bag as girl. Same pencil case, same stationery, same DRINKING BOTTLE. Boy even bought the same PINK PHONE as girl. Girl senses something is wrong n starts treating Boy coldly. Sadly it is too late. Boy already memorised girl’s timetable and waits for her after every lecture and appears out of no where when girl has her lunch break. Boy just invites himself over and sits next to girl. Girl ignores Boy but Boy does not give up! Boy starts dancing around clownishly and make weird noises so that girl will acknowledge his existence. BUT! Boy still failed miserably. Out of desperation, Boy came up with a NEW plan. Boy starts skipping his own lectures and attends girl’s lectures instead. Girl was shocked at first to see him walk in and sit right next to her, but din’t give much thought about it. Then when days go by, boy starts “accidentally” brushing his hand against girl’s body. Girl gets irritated and humilliates boy in front of the entire class by screaming: “Molester!” and slapping him so hard till he cried. Boy runs out of class crying like a baby with pink bag and all. Boy is never to be seen again. The end.

  269. Hi,Here’s my story:
    A guy in my high school bribed the girl’s best friend to throw an act in front of him and the girl he like. What ‘show’ did the guy requested?
    That girl’s best friend was to requested the guy to take their(both the girls’) photo with his camera. The point was so obvious, the guy wanted proper photo of the girl that he liked.

  270. This is a one true story of mine.
    In December 11 2004,When I was in form 3,I got to know this guy ,A through my friends.He lived in Pahang and he came to KL for holidays besides meeting his friends.He is a very nice guy and extremely brilliant in his academic achievement.He’s a pts ,and therefore,he completes his secondary study one year earlier than I.We both live in different states,and therefore,we hardly see each other throughout the year,perhaps only a few times.
    After a year,we become very close friends where we always share our spices in life everytime when we chat online.He will also share with me some tips to excel in my studies.
    I’m the type who studies very hard and crave hard for schorlarship so that I get a better offer and excel in my tertiary study.When I was in form 4,I have planned to apply for the ASEAN schorlarship so that I could study abroad in Singapore. There was one time when I told him about this in one of our conversations.He just supports with my hope by giving me advice and moral support.A few months later,he told me that he has been selected for the scholarship and he will be going to Singapore in December.I find it quite suprising because he didn’t mention anything about this all the while.What I always hear from him is that he plans to go to United Stated for their engineering course.Why would he apply for ASEAN if he had got such a plan and clear about his visions?I did not tell out my doubts but I congratulated him instead and asking him about the entire process of applying the scholarship which is also what I’m concerned.
    11th of December 2004 was the day we both got to know each other.He tend to send me special cards in every 11/12.I didn’t remember the significance of this day at first,only after when I received the first card of his on 11/12/2005.The special thing is,all the cards are handmade by him with little messages in it.I feel very grateful to have this good friend that remembers me despite living far apart from each other.He will also send me greeting cards by post every year.I thought that he is really friendly to treat his friend in such a nice and warm way.In return,I will also send him card on special occasions.He will never miss my birthday by sending me birthday gifts every year.This makes me feel very guilty because it costs a lot to post parcel from Singapore.I always advise him to not spend so much money for all these but to utilize his pocket money well since he’s studying abroad where life expenses is really high.He thinks that I’m just like a grandma who likes to mumble a lot to him.He will also come to KL to visit me when he’s having semester break in his college.
    I study in a girl school since Form 1.I have a secret admirer who sends me letter everyday and puts it on my table.This happens since beginning of form 5.I always want to trace the true indentity of this secret admirer but just fail to do so.It would hardly be a guy since I’m studying in a girl school.Thinking about this makes me more worried
    What if it is the secret admirer is my junior?who is a girl?What would I do?My friends try hard to comfort my feelings everytime when they notice my problem.Nothing can really calm down my horror because I do not want this to happen on me.Study has always been my first priority .To make this clear,I decided to find out who the admirer is and talk to her/him.One day,I came to school early on purpose to reveal the truth that has been bothering me for 1/years.
    I finally found out the one,and she was quite shocking to see me.She is actually a form 4 girl in my school.We both went to the field and she took the opportunity to confess to me.I tried very hard to reject her in a polite way,trying not to hurt her feelings by being harsh to her.My friends helped me to explain to her.She looked quite disappointed when she left and told me that she is willing to do anything just to make me happy.Since then,she did not disturb me and love letters are all gone.
    One of my best friends in school,B who is also A’s friend told him about this.I didn’t know about this.On that night,A called me at night when I was studying,he sounded worry and asking me about that incident.I have no other choice but to tell him the truth despite I do not plan to tell him about this.He blamed me for not telling him earlier.He wants me to promise him that I’ll tell him whenever I’m in help,so that he could help me or just giving advises.I thanked he for being so caring as a friend.This is the time where I started wondering about his true feelings.
    I only realize about his true feelings to me on my 17th birthday.He sent me a gift 2 days before my birthday,together with a card and a letter.It was a neklace and it looked pricy.I read through the letter.I was suprised to notice that it was a love letter instead of a normal letter.To make matter worse,he says that he likes me since 2 years ago.He always asks about my condition through my friend instead of asking me.The reason he applied for the ASEAN scholarship was also because of me,so that we can meet often if I’m selected for the scholarship a year after him.He studied very hard in order to get the scholarship because it’s not easy without effort made.He also told me the reason he sends cards to me is to not make me forget about him due to the far distance we stay from each other.He gave me time to think about it and will call me for my decision.
    Instead of happy,I feel scared because this is not a stranger who admirers me,but he is my good friend who always helps me on my studies and problems.I understand that I do not fall for him because I do not want to be involved in any of the relationships at this early age.I feel guilty for all the things he had done for me.However,I still have to face with this although I know that my decision will hurt him the most.Without waiting for his phone call,I called him,and I told him that I appreciated all the things he had done,but it was just my problem.I tried not to hurt his feelings because I do not want to lose a good friend just like that.He sounded depressed.He did not say anything,but just thanked me for being such a good friend all the time.I cried at that night,because I know I can’t repay him anything for what he did.It made me feel really bad when I think of every single help he offered to me.
    I did not get the scholarship but I was offered to another scholarship of a local college instead.We are still good friends even after this and everything seems to be normal.He will still send me handmade cards on special ocassions with messages in it,telling me that he will always be by my side no matter what happens,as a good friend will be good enough.Life seems to be normal as though nothing has happened.I do not know what are the changes in life after all these,but one thing I’m very sure is that he will always be my best friend and one trust-worthy person whom I have know for so long.I hope that he stays fine and manages to achieve his goals in life.I do not hope that his early decision will ruin his plan for his future,which is probably because of me.Good friends are always meant to be forever,perhaps this is just what I can do for him.
    If he ever reads this,I really want to say:
    I feel so sorry!!

  271. i agree with monkeyonkey, im so envious of all the crazy things ppl did to win the hearts of those they liked!!
    i guess every girl would also hope for some really dramatic and romantic encounter, some prince charming to sweep them off their feet.haha altho its irritating/scary to those ppl who have such admirers, i cant help wondering what it would be like to have such admirers.. oops maybe i shld be careful wad i wish for..haha
    but i am really curious to see who kenny will pick as the winner tho.. quite a few stories are both touchinn and funny… and tho there may be a few fake ones around but i think for the bulk of it are true and heartwarming stories.. behind each one lies heart pain/passion etc..
    kenny, hope you’ll have such contests in the future. its really meaningful, besides juz winning the fone u made us all think about love and what it meant..and to the desperate ppl i guess its a wake up call. haha. its also touching and i guess everyone can more or less sympathise/empathise, they will surely be on one side or the other b4 (either loving or being loved)
    i have a desperate addict story too, but its just one of the many here.. now i realise so many ppl have nearly the same experiences i have, it makes me wonder about love and relationships and all. that someone may mean so much to you but in another perspective its just another guy. just another story. another desperate addict.
    haha, dunno why, feel the bittersweet feeling reading all those stories… happy for those who were successful and sad for those who remained unrequited..

  272. KENNY, first all of..hey, hope u are doing fine..Just wanna say even if i do not win this or u have many other more entries to read, PLS DO SPARE SOME TIME reading this because this is a 100% genuine one..I read some of the above ones which i think were pretty fake though..Im typing this on the behalf of my friend, Heather. Being in an all girls school since primary school days till she graduated in form 5, she was very much a desperate addict of ‘gap zhai-ing’ aka checking out guys just whenever and wherever she goes..To make things fun, she would always be talking about it around with me and the other bunch of friends about the guys who catches her attention, be it a tall dark or fair hot hunk with sharp appealing features..Well if u were to be in an all girls school for practically your whole entire schooling life, u cant help it but would probably cuci mata exceptionally often when u are out hanging out with friends, right? So, back then u can say she was very much a naive girl who believed love at first sight..There was once (18 yrs old) she met a guy through a friend of her’s, and though they were just mutual friends, i could see that she was deeply interested in him..She has ber-gazillion photos of him eversince they were introduced to one another and started hanging out..She personally loves snapping photos, so each time they were both out, or even when he’s alone and when she was at a far distance, she will secretly snap a few shots of him and will keep it as her collections after developing the photos..She then pasted the pics all over her bedroom wall, ceiling, cupboard and even in the toilets! Im gonna skip all the she-will-call-him-everyday&nite scenario thing because its just too common among these desperate addicts..Im pretty sure desperate addicts normally would do more than just the everyday calling the guy thing which i would categorize that as a norm?..Ok fine..those might not have caught your attention since it sounds so dull and boring..Anyway, back to this girl, Heather..Though the things which im about to tell you sounds synical but its nothing but the truth..No, im not gona say that she committed suicide because of him or drank rat poison or even bungee jump off the building to prove her her sincerity of love for him coz that would be a rather stupid and insane thing to do..By the way, Heather’s style of dressing was more towards the sporty side and will hardly put on any skirts. No one will be able to convince her to apply on some make ups and so forth but ironically, she was so obssessed with this guy until she was more than willing enough and had decided to go for a makeover after finding out his dream gals which he would like to date are pleasant looking ones with really long brown chestnut hair, hazel colored big round eyes, nice straight teeth, sharp nose, small but pouty lips, wears minis, and basically just baby T’s..She did EXACTLY like what he told her during their casual convo they had at my birthday party..Well, of course the guy was so dumb that he didnt know she would do all that for real though he also sensed that she had a lil crush in him..But he was wrong, it aint a crush, but was a desperate love she had in him..I knew about this was bcoz she literally told me everything which concerned the guy as i was one of her close friends..All this had taken place after a about a yr since she first knew him..Being a friend of hers, i talked to her about the consequences of undergoing plastic surgeries because she has opted to enlarge the size of her eyes, change the structure of her nose and lips including straightening her teeth with braces..Since she came from a quite well to do fmly, her fmly permitted and supported her financially in all of the surgery costs..Btw, yes, initially her nose wasnt sharp, she had squinted eyes and her lips was definitely not pouty at all..After having a thorough discussion with the doctor, they then finally fixed a date..She sure enough felt nervous about it and she knew eventhough she has done it, she might still fail to win the guy’s heart as she did not really confess her feelings for him as she was afraid that he would turn her dwn..So, she just took the risk and underwent the surgeries which lasted a few weeks..Btw, the charges were a bomb..It costed her around RM 40k in total..My other friends and i took turns to visit and took care of her through out that few weeks of her recovery from the treatment and the most heartbreaking thing was the guy left for overseas to further his studies without even notifying Heather..She broke dwn in tears so badly that she lost her appetite to eat and just wouldnt speak for weeks..My friends and i were really furious seeing our dear friend left in such a horrible state of negligence, thus we decided to track the whereabouts of the guy and at least get an explanation from him to get a clearer picture..Several days later, we were told that it was his father’s sudden decision to send him to Australia to complete his 3yr of degree..He FINALLY confessed that he really did liked her too but was also afraid of starting on a relationship with her because he feared that he will lose her in time to come since he wasnt from a very wealthy fmly which he thinks isnt compatible enough to be her bf..On the other hand, he was also in a dilemma since his dad had been saving alot of his hard earned money just to enable himslf to study in Australia..So, he was left with no choice but to leave..We finally understood the reason he didnt wanna tell her about his departure to Aussie was bcoz he didnt wanna break her heart..He was indeed very reluctant to leave her..I myslf cried a whole bucket of tears when we all found out about the whole truth..Heather was also finally relieved and was more than happy enough to know that he had feelings for her for real too..So,she told him she would wait for him and will remain as a spinster if he doesnt come bck to marry her..A year later, he was back upon his completion of his degree..Currently, they are now indeed a very happy loving dating couple which i would occassionally secretly envy them..heh..Since they both are still 20 yrs old, they only plan to tie the knot when they are in their mid 20’s..A wise thing i’d say that they decided to do..So ppl, as much as u choose not to believe in this, fairy tales like that do happen ok..heh..Btw, Kenny Sia, im sure u’ll have a gf very soon since u are pretty good looking and nice, or do u already have one ar? heh..=p Im attached edi though..heh..=]

  273. Beginning of this year,I was so desperate to get a handphone for my own,that I asked my friend to borrow his extra phone to me,and then i spoilt it (coincidentally),thus, my parents had to pay my friend,and they brought it to the shop for repair,and i get to have it.After years of longing for a phone I finally had one,eventhough it is second hand,but it doesn’t matter.Unfortunately just yesterday,my phone suddenly had errors,and doesn’t function anymore and my parents refuses to get me another or repair it.So can I please get this one.I’ve already submitted a story about 2-3 weeks ago.(it is about K spending a lot of money on gifts for his ex and spreading rumours about his gf and them ending up together again.IT IS A TRUE STORY)
    I’m really desperate to get this phone,because i want to have the feeling of having a 1st hand phone,prove to myself that for once in my lifetime i would be lucky,and also there are no other ways that I can communicate with my boyfriend/the outside world other than going out which I can’t,often.I really need this phone.
    please note that I do take care of my things properly,is just that N3230 is very problematic with the keypads and screen and everything.

  274. hey kenny..
    must be tough for u to be reading each n every posting here.. so niway.. dis is mine..there were quite a number of desperate cases in my life all tru out dis 21 years.. but the one im gonna tell wud be beating of al ’em n seriously,, its just plain scary..
    it back back 3 years ago, wen i was doin my lower six in a coed school.. so there was dis guy, S, who was qualified to get the “Worst Student Award”, looks weird, acts weird n finally he is basically weird.. but we didnt knoe dis.. me n my close frens wud just stay away from him.. n sumhow he fell for my fren, A, n she kinda liked him too.. so things wen on for them.. n afta a few months, S started approaching me.. just remember all tru b4 i dun really tok to him, but since he was my frens’s crush, i tot its ok.. so he wud start hangin around wherever i was, started tokin to me like everytime he cud get free from class,, n from his “Award” its basically anytime.. so dis guy wud start following me. at 1st i didnt really bother but he started gettin a bit more desperate.. he started following me home.. n not oni dat wherever i go.. i used to go for sum prayers everyweek at a local center n he started cumin there and he wud try to butter up everyone there, by promoting himself n tryin to help around especially the ladies including my mother!!he wud wait till we r leaving the place n he wud leave da same time, just follwinmy car back n wen we stop at the traffic light, he used to tap my window n tok to my mom n my sisters.. n then he wud go on doin stunts on his motorbike. but he didnt dare to do dis wen my dad was there.. ,,since it was my upper 6 year, i used to stay back to study in the library, he started following me, n sitting next to me.. i just cudnt push him away.. n then from his normal desperation, it turned ugly..he confessed to me..sayin he loves me so much… n wud do anyting for me.. n i rejected him sayin i already have a bf.. n he started cryin..all the while b4 he used to carry a file which was full of an actress pic n ppl used to tease him about it.. n he told me , dat i looked like the actress n since he doesnt have my pic, he looks at it day n nyt..( its NOT flatterin to get a comment from a nutcase).. ppl have told me that his room is full of the pics.. n once wen i ws goin down the stairs in skool, he plucked off a few strands of my HAIR!!! FREAKY.. N he taped it to the pics of the actress n kept it in his pocket.. n he started to follow me around..n everytime he sees me he wud take out the pics wid my hair on it n start kissing it.. he wud alwiz start toking real terrbile tamil movie lame dialogues ” bout how his life has changed afta meeting me n he wans to marry me,,,?” .. everywhere i wen he was there, n wud always try to take pictures of me.. n i had no choice but to tell my dad,, n wen my dad reprimanded him, the next day i got an email in super brokn eng saying dat ” ur father was so kind n he toked to me so kind n almost like my own dad.. n all those shit.. i used to hate goin to skool b4 ofhim.. n i had to run n hide in the toilet(which by the way stinks terribly) everytime i c dis guy just to avoid him.. n he is just not sum nerdy guy, he was renowned as a gangster..he used to try to steal my things wen im not in the class.. we r not from the same class, so suring recess, or anywhere, he actualy like took my waterbottle, even paper scribblings n i found it out by fren who is in his classmates.. n even his stupid frens wud actually like ask me y i dun wan to accept him n dis S has changed so much n now he is so quiet..haihs.. so basically i managed to survive all his stupid 10 emails a day, n multiple phone calls tru the nyt, changed my number a couple of time.. bt he didnt dether.. he kept cumin to my center, kept circling my house a thousand times 24/7 n wen i left to uni, he even found out where i got, n which block i am in… n bout my fren who liked him, n he liked her… he told me it was all a scam by him n his frens who made a dare to c if she responds to him… sick ryt.. haihs… so here i am.. still tryin to erase his memory of my mind.. n u bet i hate to c movies with that actress in it.. n yeah btw, now wenever i c him, i engage myself in conversation wid hot guys just so he wudnt dare.. hehe..
    ppl doin desperate stuffs like callin n remakin is still ok.. but scary tings like pluckin off ppls hair n stealin your things.. dats just too much..u gotta agree on dis

  275. Just trying my luck. Hope i have the best luck *wink*
    It was about 3 months ago. there is this anuall interior designer gathering from colleges all over Peninsular Malaysia. Its called ‘Sebelas’ because it is the 11th year of such gathering. There are many games and competition during dat day. My group took part in Choral Speaking competion. When we were asked by lecturers to take part we just agreed thinking about the fun we are gonna have together just before out graduation since we are already in the last semester.
    The group consist of 10people. What is Choral speaking is all about? all of us have no idea at all. Then we were looking for the right story line. As if it isnt hard enough to get the ideas and all, we have to make a story which has “synergy” concept in it. All 10 of us sat down and give many many suggestions which some of them are quite disgusting. Like ‘life of a toilet’, ‘life of human waste’ and sth along that line. We wanted to be different so we desperately look for sth that is outstanding and yet attractive.
    We did many many thinking and at last we settled with ‘MAMAK Stall Story’. We thought that was the best of all ideas and we can inject some humour in it to make things more interesting. For the next few days we come up with a script. It wasnt easy to make the script either as he sentences should rhyme, make it nice to hear and all. 3 of us in the group wrote the script as we have the best English among all.
    So we came out with the script and practiced almost everyday for weeks to get everyboday to memorize the lines, say it right, make the movements, all in coordinated fashion. And then here comes THE DAY. We were all very nervous. Oh ya we all bought matching clothes which colour was pink and white to get more attention cuz we believe not many ppl would choose Pink for such competition. We asked the guys to wear quite hot pink and girls wear combination.
    On that day every body was nervous. We practiced couple more times before the time. On that day it was ahot day. Bright blinding sun, hot sweaty wind. Not the best condition. Just minutes before the competition we were told the rules of Choral Speaking. One of the were no obvious movements of hands and other body parts. We were all shocked and frightened cuz for us we have quite some movements. Its too late to modify or erase the movements completely that we have practiced for weeks. We were nervous and scared we had a quick discussion, real quick like few minutes only. In desperation we decided to just go ahead with whatever we practiced. The aim is to have some fun, its just a competition doesnt really matter wheter we win or not.
    So there we were, all 10 of us standing in front of thousands of fellow designers to present our Mamak Stall Story Choral Speaking. We were only given 3 mikes for the presentation. So we all had to shout as loud as possible to get everybody to hear what we are saying. WHile all of us shouts very loudly in front deafening each other other students from our college were also making up some lines and shouts them to support us as the marks comes from the amount of support too.
    At the end of the competition all of us were exhausted and voiceless, as we used up or strength and voice during the 5 minutes of Choral Speaking. But all of that paid off because we could see the audience enjoyed it and laughed at the jokes. Even the judges said it was a good one.
    So at the end of the gatherhing day. We were nervous awaiting the result. We were not sure whether we could win cuz we kinda broke the rules. The organiser annonced 3rd place – not us, 2nd place – not us either, 1st place – MIA! MIA is my college not Missing in Action… its Malaysian Institute of Arts. All of us jumps up in excitement and we were all grinning from ear to ear while receiving the prize. Sadly the prize is just a piece of glass 1/4 A4 size with the writing of ‘Choral Speaking Campion’ for each of us. Lousy but the feeling, the excitement, happiness were worth it. The desperation and nervousness before we replaced with pride and glee. It was priceless.
    =D

  276. I have a guy friend, D, who is very much in love with this girl, R. They stayed as friends because R does not have the same sort of feeling for D. Few years down the road, R had to migrate to Canada with her whole family [for a reason we never found out] and D was thinking hard of something to give her before she leaves for her to remember him.
    A bunch of us discussed and listed out the things we thought might be suitable but he rejected all saying that they are not special enough. One of us got fed up with his attitude and said, “Man, if you want something so special that no one can ever come up with, dig your heart out and give to her damnit!” Apparently, that meaningless outburst triggered D’s thought.
    What happened was, the next day, D went to the dentist and had one of his wisdom tooth extracted!
    His reason:
    1. It IS a part of him.
    2. Bones and teeth are the only body parts which will not rot after a long time.
    3. It’s not that obvious he has a tooth less, and people don’t usually get suspicious over the lack of just one tooth.
    All of us have no idea what was R’s reaction [lost contact] and whenever anyone ask him what he thought about his crazy stunt, he never seize to amaze them by saying no with a blissful smile on his face.

  277. This is a TRUE story and probably the most pathetic one. It all started when I was in Form 4. I met this girl at a party and it was love at first sight. At least on my part anyway.
    I tried to get as close to her as possible and finally a friend introduce me. So I started to collect as much information as possible.
    She said she admired men in uniforms such as prefects. Which was a good thing since prefect selections at our school was coming soon.
    Since prefects were ‘voted’ by fellow students I knew I was not going to stand a chance since I was not the most popular student in school. So I got my father to help talk to the teachers. After a “small donation” to the school building fund, I was a prefect. My classmates immediately suspect foul play since they started talking and none of them had voted for me. So who made this loser a prefect.
    Anyway I manage to meet up with here again in some more parties. I always attended those parties in my prefect uniform complete with suit, tie and badge to catch her attention. It also caught the attention of other attendees too. Who is that loser in a suit in Malaysian climate?
    I tried to gather more information and manage to get her phone and house number. But despite trying to contact her, she still has not shown any interest in me. I was running out of time as SPM was approaching and she mention that her parents will send her off to overseas to study. I had to do something or else I will lose her.
    I decided to send her a “PACKAGE” to confess my love for her. I compiled everything I know about her and decided on the contents of the package. The package finally included:
    1. Flowers – half dozen of roses
    2. A valentine card – although it was in August
    3. A video I made of myself confessing my love for her.
    I decided to send the package at 2am to her house to avoid anyone seeing me doing it.
    The next morning I was pretty pleased with myself. I felt confident that my actions will lead to success. However I checked my bag and discovered the Video was still in my bag!!! So what video did I put in the package????!!!!
    To my horror, it was my private 5 star porno video!!!!! I rushed back to her house hoping that the package was still in the mailbox. I was relief that it was. I tried to remove it and swap the video.
    In my haste I ripped the card and detroyed the flowers. Sigh!!! anyway, I replaced the correct video this time.
    I finally got her call in 2 days saying that “I TREAT YOU AS A FRIEND”
    WTF!!!! I felt like the biggest loser of all.
    I was so angry that I decided to send her the same PORNO tape anonymously anyway
    I have never heard or seen her since then.
    R, wherever you are now, I hope you enjoyed the porno tape as much as I did. I had used that tape on numerous self-gratifying ocassions, by imagining you and me instead of the actors.
    Yours sincerely
    X rated loser

  278. This is a story about a friend of mine, and I shall relate it to you here but I would think he would prefer to remain anonymous so I’ll name him Z.
    Anyways, Z is a 33 year old man who’s been sick of the family pressure to get married and have children. He’s previously had a Caucasian girlfriend whom he was much in love with, only to cause disagreements within the family who threatened to disown him if he marries her. They wanted him to have a Chinese wife.
    Hence, Z had to break up with her many years back and remained single for quite a while (he went into a period of depression for quite a while). With the increasing pressure, loneliness and not being able to find anyone he really loved, one odd day he came across a girl on a chat room whom he felt attracted to after long hours of chatting.
    This girl was from China, and they spent more and more time together everynight online. Soon, he began to fall in love with her and vice versa and she was what he thought ‘a gift from heaven who brought love back to his life.’ She was perfect in every way for him, and they continued to have a relationship through the internet. They spoke on the phone for hours, and attempted phone-sex and cyber-sex. He soon began to lose it with the real world as he dedicates him time fully to this girl. He had pictures of her placed everywhere in his room and was even browsing for hours on the net to find where he could have a custom made inflatable balloon of her so that he could have ‘her’ by his side everynight when he goes to bed (thank god he din’t manage to find a place that made it!).
    After two years, he decided that he would propose to her, he bought her an air ticket to Malaysia to meet his parents and catch her by surprise with a proposal. She said she would come, but towards the time, she told him of a bereavement in the family and could not make it. He was devastated but was empathetic and understanding towards her. He decided then that it was this golden opportunity that he could take to visit her by surprise and when her parents see how much he cared for her, they would accept him. He got on the next flight to China with a diamond ring to propose(almost cost him his job as his boss wasn’t very happy that he took leave at the busiest time of the year), and with the address he had in hand, he went to look for her.
    This was when the ‘fairy-tale’ came to an end. He was shocked to find out that there was no such person living there. He couldnt believe it and in denial, he tried to think of all sorts of possible reasons. He tried to get back in touch with her online that night, and when he confronted her, she just logged off and to cut the story short, ever since she’s not been online ever again.
    It was really a sad thing, and Z’s never been the same again. Until today, he’s still not gotten over her.

  279. i was really stupid in secondary school… i fell in love with a girl… but i think at that point in time i thought i was in love because she had big boobs and was known for it… i was a very quiet nerd and was never ever noticed by her but anyway i decided to ask my friends in school what would be the best thing to say to her so she’d like me… and when the moment was right i said, “you look so fucking hot and your bussoms are pert for the taking” you can imagine what happened after. and that was that. SIGH

  280. ” Is there a desperate addict in my life ? ”
    There were so many stories in my life that can be used to answer Kenny’s this question. However, I have chosen the one below.
    Being in love is arguably one of the most exciting thing in a person’s life. This applies to everyone’s life, with no exception, me. People regard love is blind, because once a person is in love, everything is just about the person they love. A young soul like me would like to share the most deperate story in my love life. Not saying this as blind love, I think this is more to ‘ total desperate ‘ to impress my ex-girl friend.
    Giving a mindful thought and flashback to what happened last year, I laughed and smiled. This is a story about me, folding 999 paper stars for my ex-girlfriend a year ago.
    It was her 18th birthday, and of course, as a boyfriend, I would like to impress her. However, we are living too far apart (about 1 and the half hours drive). A month before her birthday, I went to KL, walked around a few shopping mall, to buy her a doll. A ‘frog’ doll, because that’s what she called me. Yes, “Frog” for some reason. The idea of buying her a “frog” doll for her 18th birthday suddenly came into my mind because I hope that, she seeing the doll, is like seeing me. This is the problem of long distance relationship. I can’t help.
    Okay, I bought this doll and a big box, I went back to my hometown. I ran up to my brother and asked him to teach me how to fold paper stars. 999 paper stars symbolizes “forever love”. That was what in my heart, for that very particular moment. I wanted to impress her, I wanted her to know that I love her more than anything else. I picked up how to fold paper stars in just 15 minutes. I am a new folder (not as easy as a “right click” and open a new folder). I set the target to fold 999 stars in 3 days (just right before her birthday). However, being so naive, I thought it will take only a while.
    I was so desperate ! Why ?
    I gave up playing soccer every evening. Soccer is like my life. I can’t live without it, but just because I want to finish all the STARS, I stayed at home everyday. Rejected all the calls from my friends because I knew they were going to ask me to somewhere. *I was back in Malaysia for my holiday break in Perth*. Just imagine, how desperate am I, spending my time at home, folding paper stars for someone, who is not actually guaranteed to be my wife. To impress her, I did not care what others say.
    My mom said this to me ” you don’t be stupid, folding so much and you don’t even know if she’s true to you. If one day she leaves you, don’t be mad and cry like a baby ”
    My dad says ” don’t hurt yourself at the end by putting in too much hope now ”
    I DID NOT CARE and just WALKED AWAY. It took me more than 2 days (48 hours nonstop, combined all the time I SPENT) to finish all the 999 stars. I drove to the shop, to buy more paper. I did not know how much paper I required. I ended up going to the same shop thrice, just to buy paper to fold paper stars. The boss was wondering how much I was folding. He went like WHAT ? 999 ! ? when I told him.
    I folded day and night. My daily routine for the three days were something like this. Wake up -> start to fold -> lunch -> continue folding -> dinner -> continue folding. That was basically what I have been doing for the past 3 days. Asked why I did not do that earlier if I love her so much ? Well, that idea came like 3 days before her birthday. It was a good one, and of course, I did not give up just because I was running out of time. I even fall asleep in the middle of the folding process. Mom saw, she woke me up (and guess what…it was like 2am in the morning) and I opened my eyes, and I started folding again. This hurted her because I gave up the time to sleep, just to fold. I KNEW if I don’t do that, I wouldn’t be able to finish them. 999 isn’t a small number. She asked me to stop folding, but I ignored her. I turned my mom down, just because I wanted to impress my ex-girlfriend. Sometimes when I was tired, I lay on my bed and fold. I just non stop folding……….
    I managed to finished them just before her birthday. I drove to the shop, to get a bottle to fill all that up. Too bad, none of the bottle can fill them up. I ended up putting them in a nice looking small bag (which I bought on the same day)
    The next morning, I woke up, get myself dressed .. and drove to her place. It took me, one and the half hour, as i told to get there. We have decided to meet in one of the shopping complex. I reached there 30 minutes earlier. Not forget to tell, that was the first official date for both me and her. I waited inside one of the cafeteria , feeling nervous. I had a bouquet of flower beside me, her gigantic present box with the “frog” doll inside and most preciously her 999 stars. I waited patiently…
    30 minutes passed…
    45 minutes passed…
    An hour passed….
    She still haven’t turn up. No sms, no phone call … nothing …
    I already finished my second glass of drinks…Then I got an sms from her.. saying..she was going to be late…and she said sorry…I replied by saying ” nvm it’s ok .. take your time ”
    After sitting there for nearly 2 hours .. finally my phone rang….
    I picked up the phone .. and she cried .. I was so nervous and desperately want to see her .. because I did not know what had happened to her .. She said .. come to the roof (roof parking area). I ran up using the stairs (i couldn’t find the lift) holding the flowers, the gigantic box and all the stars ..
    I looked around, and saw her car…she was crying..and I ASKED her why.. she just said.. i am sorry.. i can’t go out with you today. I said..it’s ok.. i will call you later..
    *put her presents in her car* and she drove off….
    I later found out from her that, she had some arguement with her mom and she must go back home. This was understandable and I did not have any bad feeling.
    Just I was desperately wanted to have a good birthday celebration with her, and I ended up driving back to my hometown. WHICH means… I drove 3 hours ++ for an empty date. I lied to my parents that I actually had a date with her on that day when they asked me. I was so desperate.
    And now, she has gone .. the 999 stars I folded … the frog from a mall after walking for almost 8 hours .. the journey to and back which took me more than 3 hours .. weren’t enough to keep her heart with me ….
    And at this time, I still desperately want to fold another 2 paper stars for her.. (adding to the 999 I gave her last year) which makes it 1001 , brings the meaning I love you forever (if i am not mistaken)
    Am I desperate ?
    Sorry for this late entry, Kenny. I was busy with studies :).
    Cheers !

  281. Dinner with her parents and Duke (the dog)
    Here i would like to share this hilarous story out of his
    desperate action ,that happens to my dear college friend
    Kenneth,who is so desperately to go out with his dream girl.
    Let me introduce this guy first before i start the story.He is those good guy that alwaz help friends , sometimes he kinda blur he looks a bit shy typed guy.He likes to eat a lot and he got smalll tummy n looks a little bit chubby .Overall he looks good because he got thick eyebrow n big eyes.So…his dream girl is those good polite girl that is long hair n talk softly type.
    So before he can really start to date this girl,the girl parents need to have a dinner with him before let their daughter hang out with him.So no matter what Kenneth for sure agree to go for the dinner,eventhough he dont feel comfortable with it.So he is actually very nervous about the first meeting up with her parents.
    Because of the girl he need to face up with it, so he put on a proper wear n get prepared well for it.And on that night he did meet up his dreamgirl parents for the first time.They dine together at her house in the dining room.
    After dinner,his dream girl and her mother left the room to do dishes,leaving him with the father and the dog Duke,who was sitting underneath Kenneth’s chair. Unfortunately,it was a large dinner and he really had to FART
    His dream girl father still need to do some serious talk with him,so he not dare to get away from there.And on that time..he is so desperately to let out his fart on that time,and he try to struggle it hope that he can (tahan) stop the fart from coming out…(so desperate to FART..arhhh…)so he think want to try to tell his dreamgirl father that he need to go toilet,but on tat time ,her father already hints that..dont try to run away from this talk .
    So on that period he cant walk away from that dining table.
    …omigod…he cant tahan d ,so he decided to let it out little by little,slowy and quitely,but…unfortunately his fart still able to be hear.
    ” Duke!”the dad yelled to the dog that sit underneath Kenneth’s chair.
    “This is great!” Kenneth thought.”He thinks the dog is farting!”so….he let out another one,which he dont really control the flow or noise of it.
    “Duke!”the father shout.
    Kenneth thought he was safe,so he let everything out at once in a loud n smelly fart
    “Duke! Get out of there before the boy shits on you”

  282. Dinner with her parents and Duke (the dog)
    Here i would like to share this hilarous story out of his
    desperate action ,that happens to my dear college friend
    Kenneth,who is so desperately to go out with his dream girl.
    Let me introduce this guy first before i start the story.He is those good guy that alwaz help friends , sometimes he kinda blur he looks a bit shy typed guy.He likes to eat a lot and he got smalll tummy n looks a little bit chubby .Overall he looks good because he got thick eyebrow n big eyes.So…his dream girl is those good polite girl that is long hair n talk softly type.
    So before he can really start to date this girl,the girl parents need to have a dinner with him before let their daughter hang out with him.So no matter what Kenneth for sure agree to go for the dinner,eventhough he dont feel comfortable with it.So he is actually very nervous about the first meeting up with her parents.
    Because of the girl he need to face up with it, so he put on a proper wear n get prepared well for it.And on that night he did meet up his dreamgirl parents for the first time.They dine together at her house in the dining room.
    After dinner,his dream girl and her mother left the room to do dishes,leaving him with the father and the dog Duke,who was sitting underneath Kenneth’s chair. Unfortunately,it was a large dinner and he really had to FART
    His dream girl father still need to do some serious talk with him,so he not dare to get away from there.And on that time..he is so desperately to let out his fart on that time,and he try to struggle it hope that he can (tahan) stop the fart from coming out…(so desperate to FART..arhhh…)so he think want to try to tell his dreamgirl father that he need to go toilet,but on tat time ,her father already hints that..dont try to run away from this talk .
    So on that period he cant walk away from that dining table.
    …omigod…he cant tahan d ,so he decided to let it out little by little,slowy and quitely,but…unfortunately his fart still able to be hear.
    ” Duke!”the dad yelled to the dog that sit underneath Kenneth’s chair.
    “This is great!” Kenneth thought.”He thinks the dog is farting!”so….he let out another one,which he dont really control the flow or noise of it.
    “Duke!”the father shout.
    Kenneth thought he was safe,so he let everything out at once in a loud n smelly fart
    “Duke! Get out of there before the boy shits on you”

  283. haha. okay. seems like you’ve made your decision on the three finalists. not much hope of winning now, but I’m going to share a story anyway, just for the fun of it… cause i think this one is fun! ^.^
    I have this morbidly obese best friend. well, maybe not morbidly obese… what’s another word for ‘a-walking-heart-attack-about-to-die-soon-from-extreme-obesity’ ? i’ll check the dictionary later and hit you back once i find out, hoh kenny? please excuse my limited vocabulary for now ya. 😛
    so this miss AWHAATDSFEO likes my classmate. he’s VERY good looking and i like him too. thus, she asked for my help to get to know him better. i told her to come to my class during recess because he’s usually there to bask us in his holy light of awesomeness and metrosexuality or something. she claimed to be shy instead, and asked me for his phone number. after a few blackmails and two weight-loss pill bottles (don’t ask) later, i got his legit number.
    now miss AWHA..forgot the rest…has a very cute voice, despite her looking like a bloated midget on drugs. this got her a lot of “phone boyfriends”. she SMSed him and introduced herself as my friend (damnit! sell my name some more) and they became instant friends. soon, they started calling each other and i think he got attracted to her cute voice. she sounds like one of those anime characters, minus the japanese language and the not actually existing in real life part.
    in the end, she finally got him really, really hooked. he would pass gifts through me and write her chinese poetry (she was malay) and they would have a fun time talking about it while she clumsily translated them.. i knew because she told me every painstaking details.
    one time, she slipped some information about herself and he got to find out her real identity.. man did he have a shock. see kenny, now should be the right time to tell you properly how she looks like.
    she has a triple-D breast cup size. now before you start wishing you’d stuff your face into her abnormally huge breasts, i should probably tell you she’s 155cm and weighs about 80kg. her breasts alone took probably 30% of that… she doesn’t have a flattering body either (in case some suku people didn’t realize :P). it’s mostly layers and layers of flab held together by stretched skin that I SWEAR is going to rip apart. that much skin is just not possible on a living body. and about her texan-sized ass…just pray that you’ll never have to see her run…i did…don’t want to talk about it anymore….. *rocks back and forth*
    the MOST disgusting thing is her neck. she has at least 5 layers on her neck and they have these black tones to it that are years of accumulated, uncleaned dirt, and they feel very rough and bumpy and scabby… (i don’t know what i was thinking when i touched them too.. at least there were enough bleach and disinfectants around :D)
    continuing the story.. this shallow but GREAT looking guy with grecian features got traumatized. i don’t blame him. i mean, come on lah, he suddenly realized he had been flirting with a human equivalent of chicken and babi hutan hybrid. a PREGNANT chicken and babi hutan hybrid. i think he even fell seriously for her at one point so it especially sickened him.. after looking at her, he abruptly ended their phone calls and refused to talk to me too. i felt like the unwilling victim. 🙁 my friend got really upset and desperately tried to contact him. when she succeeded one time, she lied and said that that wasn’t her. he had the wrong person. a simple case of mistaken identity. now he told her he would only believe her if they meet and asked to meet her at Coffee Bean. (all this while, i had to admit i enjoyed observing everything hehehehehe :D)
    okay, now we have another friend who was quite a pretty malay. she asked this friend for help and somehow got her to agree to see this guy at CB. (not THAT ‘cb’, perv..) again, i don’t know how. probably threatened to suffocate the other girl with her, um… ‘well-endowed’ chest. although the date went on (i think the guy was skeptical for most of it), it still ended in failure. the guy wasn’t attracted enough to the fake her. by now, i thought she would give up, but she didn’t.
    another thing i have to say… my friend, i think, suffers from ignorance. although she looks like how she looks like (you know.. the chicken and babi hutan hybrid.. let’s call it Babiken for cuteness :D), she’s a very heavy flirter. to give her credit though, she does have better skills than me in flirting.. anyway, this habit of hers proves that she’s not fully conscious of her.. err.. physical inattraction… eh screw that lah. her *total and complete Babiken fuglyness*.
    during co-curriculum on a saturday, she went to school wearing this silly costume. she wore a bloody tank top with knee-length skirt! she had a very nice shawl wrapped around her and wore these snowy white boots. the top had those glistening “baby princess” stones embedded and her skirt was heavily sequinned. She wore a bit of mascara and lipstick too.. i *think* she was trying to look nice and all, but it was hard to notice with all that Babiken-ness going around. 😛 she sat there, at the school canteen, looking like a horizontally challenged indonesian mother pimp transvestite, but he never came.. at least not to the canteen. i believe god was merciful towards him on that day. Hohoho. 😛
    okay now attempt number two involved his birthday gift. it was the 6th of june and she got him something personal. girls.. never.. i say NEVER photoshop you and a guy *getting married*. she even chose a model with a size 0 body to photoshop her head on. i’m guessing it was creepy for him to see his bride-to-be having a pumpkin-sized head propped on a stick and having his own mini-sized head disproportionately placed on a Hulk Hogan type body. (well… i never said her photoshopping skills were excellent.. >.>) and “shockingly”, she failed in that attempt too.
    the third attempt involved a club outing. It was around August and they went to Camp Permai (i’m not a member so i didn’t go.) to do some stuff or something. Probably just to waste the school’s money and have fun screwing the principal. on the first night, they were hanging around the teacher’s place and she approached him. he was reading some book then and she snatched it from him jokingly. according to her, he laughed, took it back from her and went someplace else to concentrate. BUT, according to another friend, he just looked confused after she did that and asked for the book back. she didn’t give it back but tried to flirt with him and came on really strong. instead of flirting back, he ran *cough*forhislife*cough* out of the cabin and tried to retrieve his book back by getting another friend to ask for it. She never did return it, and i think she still keeps the book in a small shrine or something. Ah well. who needs a “Tips-tips berguna untuk SPM” book anyway… 😛
    Now, the FOURTH one is the most interesting. it wasn’t his birthday or anything, nor was it a special occassion, but she bought him a TIRAMISU CAKE. (buy *ME* one, dangit! Best friends my at money money!) she gave it to him when school ended before he got into his car and i guess due to a temporary lapse in sanity, he thanked her and accepted the gift. I suspect there was a message written on it because after the cake, whenever he spotted her, he’d run with his tails between his legs. seeing as how she’s now always visiting me in class during recess, that means come recess, we have no more of basking in his glory and l337ness. Oh such a tragic loss… 😛 i don’t know if she’s given up now, but i hear there have been a lot of emo love poems being written and money to be saved for something lavish when the right time comes. I’m just wondering why she won’t just diet for his sake and ours. showing that ass in public has GOT to be illegal.
    in the end of it all… she still likes him, i still like him, he’s still immensely creeped out, traumatized and perpetually phobic over overweight people bla bla bla.
    ……and I should also probably tell you the second attempt (photoshopping) was my idea.
    Oops!

  284. I am a guy, V, very much known for my “blur-ness.” It was at the age of 18 that I had my first crush on a high school girl, A, 2 years my junior. I remember that I was back in my high school waiting to collect my SPM examination results. I was with a group of friends while waiting for the results to be released. It was A’s recess time and I was looking around to catch a glimpse of her. I spotted her some 30 meters away and I wanted to approach to ask her out for a date. My eyes were focused 110% on her and I was lost in cloud nine. It was during that time my friends and I adjourned to the school hall. Walking and staring at her kind of made me “high.” ROFL.
    Just when I realized A saw me looking at her, I turned away and without even noticing the pillar in front of me, I ramped straight into it. I was looking at A through the corner of my eye and sure enough she saw what had happened. My friends were laughing their asses off. I got up and composed myself. My mind was filled with thoughts of her having to see such blooper. Somehow another, I was in deep thought and my head knocked on the exact same pillar again. My friends were still laughing at what happened. This made them laughed even louder and I was already blushing.
    I gathered my guts and approached A. I asked her out for a date and she avoided by asking me how is my brains doing!! It was an embarrassment I could not forget. *fast forward* she kept avoiding my question and she just ran up to her classroom. Desperate to get an answer I ran after her and every student was wondering what happened, upon seeing a graduate and a form 3 girl running across the school compound.
    The news of what happened spread and I became “popular” among the school pupils in less than 1 hour. Upon collecting my results, one of the teachers even told me “Sudah ambil keputusan SPM, jangan main kejar kejar di sekolah ye.”
    =.=”

  285. i have this close friend since form 1 and we are all now in form 4. back in form 2, i introduced her an online game, Ragnarok Online. from there, she started playing but did not went crazy over it. at 1st she didn’t have any friends in the game and it was normal because she isn’t friendly to strangers i thought.
    but out of no where, she came flying to me saying that she had a friend in the game. i couldn’t be bothered abt tht since it was normal.until she said,”he’s mad one u know.” then i laughed, thinkin that HE CAN’T BE THAT MAD LA U KNOW, maybe jz a game addict.
    but it turns out to be.he nags my friend to becareful abt mosquitoes at night,robbery cases etc.n the freakiest thing was he wouldn’t let my friend sleep when she wants to! i told her to just off9 and tell him to buzz off since my friend claims that he is mad n annoying. she did not do so btw.
    and furthermore, this guy in my opinion, he’s very suspicious!the stories that he made up was very fake,i called him a korean drama main actor wannabe!he claims that he is very rich and his family doesnt like him and tries to kill him.and he is currently using all the best stuffs and gonna get a driving license this year.
    later on,this guy asked my friend to be his girlfriend.my friend rejected.she doesn’t have feelings on him.yea, he went on askin and askin for 2 whole years until this very day…
    2 years later, we r both in form 4.he is still on with his annoying tactics to persuade my friend to be his gf! once this year, he told my friend that his dad asked him wan to go on a holiday end of this year or not, can bring along his friends wor!my friend said, “if sam [me] is going, then im going.” this guy DOESN’T want me to go la, becoz we r both tight enemies.we both dislike each other 2 the max.
    no matter what, he did ask me:
    he: wei~my dad ask bla bla bla… [full length story]
    me: wah!!!so good!!!rly or not?!
    he: yea~comin ma?~
    me: wait!!!do i get to go shopping 1st?!!!
    he: heh~as much as u want~my dad say as long as not more than 300k singapore dollar~
    me: wa!means i can buy original LV handbag hor?!
    he: anythg u want leh~
    me: waaa!!!no leh,u send me the LV handbag then i’ll go.
    he: anythg leh~i send to u tomorrow.
    me: ok loh!then i can go paris to shop or not?!i wanna stay in the finest hotel!i wanna sit 1st class aeroplane ok!
    he: anythg~
    me: wa! so good!
    he: so~coming?~~
    me: bullshit,this sounds more like a going to be rape case.oh btw, like u r gettin my house address hor.and yea, U THINK IM GOING ON A HOLIDAY WITH A FREAKIG STRANGER LIKE U LA!
    he: no no!~, no bluff de~!
    me: i dont care la u bluff or for real. i rather be safe than sorry! and u think u can rly buy me the original LV handbag?petaling street many fake one leh. im not stupid okie?!get me? now go away!
    he: haihz~cannot go honeymoon with her~
    not only that, his english is extremely broken n he claims that he is from some catholic school in KL.
    what’s more!whenever he asked my friend WHEN CAN HE BE HER BF. my friend would tell him, “until u r able to correct my english.”
    he once send over his photo and he said he was havin high fever that time -.-”
    anyway,this guy claims that he got cancer n 2 years ago, it was the last stage already and because of my friend, he was alive until today. what kind of cancer, i dunno la.
    n he claims that he have my friend’s house add. from her IP number, but whenever we ask for it, he always find all kind of excuse to not tell us. haha! obviously he was lying n he thinks that we r a bunch of dumbos!
    once too, he told my friend that his private part was bleeding. we r all like –> uh huh?
    after that, i didn’t know what happen.all i know is, he is a real desperate addict online ever and my friend was like another desperate one coz she suddenly got someone who loves her so much. -.-”’
    desperate guy for a girl + desperate girl for love from a guy = perfect match?

  286. the way proudofhavingafatfriend writes sounds a bit like iwilleatyourpetfrogalive.
    even the format of their nicknames sound the same.
    anyway, entertaining story =D

  287. i had a crush back in the primary school days! he was my 1st crush! so bloody cute and cool! he was a classmate in my tiution. i always wish to sit with him to get to know him better or talk to him and be friends. but never got the chance. and i collect pokemon cards because of him. i heard he likes pokemon cards and only trade for the good ones. so i try to get all the good ones and persuade my friend to give me one of his charizard kos i heard its a rare card and its very gud.
    after a few days he came to me and asked me if he could see my deck. i was so nervous and so happy. i took out my deck of cards and he browse through them and saw my charizard and my eevie. he asked me if i could give him the eevie and charizard. and i gladly said yes. u know…as a gift or something. haha! and he said “r u sure? give bo not trade bo.” and i said “yea…nvm… i got summore.” and he took it and walk away. and i heard him told his friends “hey u noe i get these cards from that stupid gurl over there!” Walao!!! tulan man me! but after that i kindda regreted it. and we had not spoken after that. but i still like him! but he dosent wanna tok to me. so i just can watch him from afar.
    last yr i saw him at my BM tiution. i still like him! actually waiting for a day where i can see him again. n i saw him there at my BM tiution. i was so happy. i’ve never felt that happy before. he look even more handsome then im my pri. school days! so tall and mascular!!!! wahhhh!!!! and i sit with him. i talked to him as in asking him question about the subject and stuff… then we became friends. i think he didnt know i was the gurl dat gave him the pokemon cards. and i didnt tell him.
    at the end of the year, i confessed to him dat i liked him and asked him if he could remember me. he shook his head and i help him recall by telling him i was the gurl hu gave him the pokemon cards. and i said i had a crush on him since dat time. i asked if we can be more then friends and he said he will think about it.
    few weeks later i asked him and he beat around the bush and keep changing topic. and i told him to get to the point. and he said “ure not my type. and i have some1 in mind.” that wasnt bad enough. he said i was boyish coz i played pokemon cards instead of barbie dolls. i walked way felt so tulan and dissapointed. i was thinkin all these while he thought i played pokemon cards because i like it and it made me boyish?!
    there….my desperate-to-be-acknowledge-by-some-guy story to wim myself a LG chocolate phone!

  288. I have always noticed this guy who would watch me but whenever I realised it, instead of looking away like how every guy having a crush should be acting, he stares even more blatantly and even gives this awful grin. That is why sometimes I suspect the reason he pays so much attention to me is that he just has this mind-boggling fetish for annoyance from the opposite sex.
    Then again, he wasn’t the typical kind of obvious secret admirer, geez, I am hardly flattered by this kind of sick obsession, addiction, mania, and every other word to describe his desperation.
    Besides the usual gifts and pointless sappy SMS-es, he also burned dozens of CDs, and I really mean dozens. Even though I don’t approve of his weirdness, his choice of music was alright. Or it must (quite obviously) be because he read my profiles from various sites about the kind of songs I like. So for some months now, I have been cutting down on budget reserved for music CDs. It’s like I just have to modify my Friendster profile and state what my current favourite songs are and the next day he passes a whole CD of the songs from the same artist and sometimes even songs from the same genre. Sometimes when I put more exclamation marks behind the name of the song, I even get an original CD, but of course as a sensible and reasonable person (it is so hard to resist the temptation) I return it every single time, but of course his friends will push it back to me again and again till I just had no reason to refuse. Hey, it is The Black Parade :p.
    The longest it took me to receive a CD after changing my profile? Three days. And it was because his friend could not find me -.-
    I’ve told him online, through phone and SMS, even personally but he just gives this dopey smile and nods or sometimes he’ll utter a string of odd, unconnected words so I just return his smile and walk off. What more can I do?? But I did accomplish something by making it clear that he shall never ever turn up at my doorstep after a freaky midnight encounter when I thought he was a burglar, but that’s another long story altogether. I just told him if saw him anywhere near my house – I stopped wondering how he gets my details – I would delete my blog and he’ll never find out stuff about me again -.- that was the only threat that worked.
    This desperation for attention of his can sometimes be quite selfless (or to his poor teammates, selfish) too. There was once when we were supposed to do a group project and my group made a huge mistake by not reading the assignment properly and on the day of the deadline, we just did not bother attending class because we were all too depressed, knowing this project is going to cost us 20% of the semester and the lecturer has already given an extended deadline.
    Next thing I knew, my group did hand in our project, it just looked different. The next lesson, the lecturer asked to see both of us. He was ecstatic and was obviously over the moon thinking that he did something so ‘noble’ for me. Of course my group still lost the semester’s 20% -.-
    There are enough stories of his madness to write a book (e.g. he combined my facial features with his using Photoshop, and told me that is what our babieS would look like) but the most outrageously desperate move was stalking me all the way to Genting Highlands in June. I think I jumped out of my skin when I thought I saw someone like him behind a few people at the Corkscrew queue. Then I just laughed mentally thinking I’m the one going psycho now.
    And it was him!!! And his dopey smile!!! He was not alone and had a bunch of friends, who like him, were scary stare-rs. I. Just. Freaked. Out.
    Thank goodness, he was not staying in the same hotel. Or maybe yes, which in the case I was lucky enough not to find out. Thank goodness I wasn’t alone.
    Then I found out from a friend that I’m on his Friendster bookmark and he gets constant updates whenever I update my blog or change anything. No wonder my profile had been getting up to 50 hits a day. And no wonder sometimes I see him lurking around at places I mention in my blog.
    Anyway, besides being creepily ingenious and persistent (he posted a photo of his desktop wallpaper on his Friendster, which is a huge and unbecoming photo of me -.- ; told his friend my number is saved under ‘lao po’; tried adding me in every networking site and instant messaging service available, until I approved him etc.), another weird thing about him was that he smelled funny. Not an unpleasant smell but just a whiff of something… earthy. Again, one of my friends was just out to make his life miserable and told him that. Last Friday, he was all clean-shaven and the class smelled like a whole bottle of Desperadior Addict. Ok ok, I don’t know what perfume lah but even the lecturer noticed the heavy odour!!!
    The desperation is not taking a toll yet. YET.

  289. well, honestly, i am still very in love with this guy of mine but he doesnt seem to wanna commit.
    his birthday is coming up and however desperate i am to wanna be with him, i also want him to be very happy. things has been going really well for him these past few months.
    so for his birthday, a friend and i are planning a surprise party for him. i’m in charge of most of the planning since the other guy isnt around kl. and since i am in charge of inviting his friends, i actually decided to invite the girl that he likes to grace the party. it kills me to actually do that and if they do end up being together, it would mean that i dug my own grave. however, i was desperately wanting to make him happy. call me an idiot but i really do want him to be happy and am hoping that he’d see just how much i’d sacrifice for him even if it meant at the expence of my own happiness.
    well, the other things of desperation i did was probably be a sort of ‘maid’ to him. i even let him yell at me even though i did not do anything wrong. ahaha… i realise just how stupid i am but i guess when u really love someone, u’d do anything to make him happy.

  290. V is a close friend of mine since Form 4. she was the popular girl in school, well known for her good looks and also her womanly curves. almost every guy from school lusted for her (i swear – that is how attractive she is.
    there was this new guy in class, A, who just got transfered from another town. he really isn’t the kind of guy a girl would date. he was geeky, he wore this huge-framed glasses that was about an inch thick, really curly hair, wears clothes that were way too small for him, but the worst part is, he has this disgusting habit of scratching his head very hard and he picks his nose in public and flicks whatever he picks on the wall. no one dared to go near him, afraid that they might get the lice from his hair. he had no deskmate, and no friends, and NO ONE dared to go near the place he sits in class because he flicks whatever he picks from his nose at the wall next to where he sits.
    V had many admirers and boys showered her gifts, all the time. there were normal gifts – flowers, cards, chocolates etc. she even had an admirer who was 15 years her senior that time, and he actually proposed to her! everyone in school, including the teachers talked about it. of course, she rejected his proposal. but that wasn’t the worst…
    like all the guys, A had a crush on V too. he always tried to approach her everytime he has a chance, but V always avoided him. he would write really weird poems to her, expressing his feelings for her. he even wrote her a letter saying that he loves her very much, and he even confessed that he always FANTASIZE about her that led to wet dreams. it freaked V out and since then, V would run away whenever she saw him.
    A never stopped sending V poems. he would leave them on her desk and whenever she sees them, she would take a broom and sweep them off her desk, into the drain outside our class. but A never gave up. he would send his poems through e-mail, post them to her house or slip them inside her bag. on V’s birthday, A wrote her a birthday poem, and gave her a gift in a box, wrapped with newspaper. initially, no one knew whom it was from, because it was anonymous and V’s table was full of birthday gifts. she opened her gifts during recess, and when she opened the one A gave, guess what she found? A DEAD FROG and WIGGLY SLIMY EARTHWORMS. she screamed and cried, and reported the incident to the form teacher. after that, A was called to the headmaster’s office and was warned and punished. he was transfered to another class.the ‘gift’ from A came with a letter but V never read it. the form teacher read it instead. in the letter, it was said that A wanted V to have his favourite ‘pets’ so that they would remind her of him whenever she sees them.
    from then onwards, whenever A tried to talk to V, but V couldn’t escape from him in time, she would scream at him, throw her books at him and cry hysterically. of course, the prefects and teachers who were there at that time would stop him and he would be called to the headmaster’s office. this happened continuously until one day, he was kicked out of school. you have no idea how happy and relieved V was, until one day, when he met her with a bunch of friends at a shopping complex.
    V and a bunch of friends were shopping when A found her. he was really smart this time. he did not call out her name, but followed her and her friends from behind. V and her friends were not aware of A until, they entered the ladies’ washroom to ease themselves. unfortunately, V entered the cubicle with a broken lock, so she could not lock the door, but just close it instead. A actually walked into the ladies’ washroom and even pushed open the door to the cubicle where V was in. guess what?! luckily, she was done, and she was zipping her pants when that happen. you have no idea, how she screamed and cried. her friends tried to calm her down, and one of them ran to get the security guard. A was brought to the police station and V and her parents lodged a report on him. however, A’s parents begged and begged V and her parents to forgive their son and promised to move out of the state. they didn’t want his future to be ruined. not long after that incident, A moved out of the state and it has been a very long time since any of us heard about him.
    it was long since that incident happened and V is currently furthering her studies overseas and is going steady with a guy she met in university. V developed a phobia of frogs and worms and would scream frantically or freak out when she sees them. so much for some desperate love addict…

  291. Hey Kenny! I’m from Sarawak too? Do I have any advantages? Lolz
    Okay~ here’s the story.
    I’m still in secondary 3. It happened a few months back, at the beginning of the year. There was this guy that I adore ever since I enter secondary school. Let’s call him J. I always try to peep at J during the morning assembly and how lucky am I that he is now in my class and I think I struck a lottery when he is assigned to sit next to me in class. Yupp! I think it’s the bestest thing which happened to me before.
    We started to talk to each after I managed to overcome my shyness. I asked lots of stuff about him and we talk on all sorts of topics. We started to know each other very well and well I think it’s about time for me to tell him the fact that I like him when he asked me about stuff that girls like. Well, I love teddy bears and so I told him that girls will die for teddy bears. They would even marry you if you get them an enormous one. A couple of days later, I saw him in a shopping mall, carrying a huge box and walked out from Toys ‘R’ us. He wasn’t able to spot me, I was too far away. I bet that it’ll be a huge teddy bear – for me? Oh my God! I’ve been dreaming for days about him giving me the bear.
    And yes, as you guys expected, it’s not for me but it’s for the Bitch next door.
    I got damn upset about it and turned moody (PMS maybe). The consolation prize was that the bitch rejected his bear. Well, I don’t mind him turning to me, give me the teddy bear and say the 3 words to me (I know, I’m cheap! So who cares?). But being a determined guy he is, he didn’t give up and keep going after her (Helloe! I’m way better than that bitch). Until one day the bitch couldn’t take it anymore and slap my J in front of everyone, humiliating him with words. (Bitch! You should look at the mirror first)
    Hey, that’s very bad of her doing that to my J in front of everyone. It’s that time that I planned to seek revenge – for my J!
    I asked a few friends of mine, a couple of girls and guys to accompany me. I’m gonna get my hands on her this time. I asked her out and get her to a small cottage near the school where my gang was waiting for her. We started questioning her about humiliating my J. She refused to answer as in an arrogant manner and so I got pissed off and start bitch-slapping her, Muahahaha! It was damn fun! Siti even took out a belt (who knows when she stole it from her dad) and start whacking her. My friend took a phone and recorded everything.
    Bitch-slapping was fun. It was so fun slapping her that I couldn’t stop. It’s addictive! We love it! We wouldn’t stop until the guys think that we had enough and should stop. Hey! It’s not enough okay! The guys shouldn’t have come, we were just having fun and they stopped our entertainment. Well, I managed to bitch slap her a few times before the guys dragged me away. Argh! I just wish that I had slapped her harder and with a higher frequency. Hahaha!
    My friend who captured everything with her phone posted it on YouTube as a humiliation for her. We passed the link to everyone we knew and somehow the press found out about it and so has the government. Yea, it was some kind of small mistake we made and it sounded so serious. (The mistake was not slapping her hard enough!) Apparently, we got suspended and there goes our future! Not to mention, a cute blogger even imitated us a placed it on YouTube. Gee… I never thought that we’re that famous.
    I finally realized that it was a big mistake that I made. I got suspended and it’s the end of my secondary school life meaning I won’t get to see him everyday and sit next to him.
    The worst thing is that he never appreciated that and we broke off after that. (Did we even start?)
    I’m desperately addicted to J and also slapping bitches!
    *Yes, I know everything is a make up but don’t you think it’s way more creative than the others. Hahahaa!And I’m totally not from Sarawak.

  292. oh noooo! i hope this isn’t too late!
    back in form 1 there was this guy in form 5, i think… who really, really wanted to date me.
    around that time, i think i was into hip hop. like nelly and all that. so he would come to school with plasters on his face. nelly style.
    his friends were extremely supportive of him, always coming to my class trying to convince me that he’s a good guy and that i should go out with him. i gave all sorts of reasons, from “i don’t date non-athletes” to “my parents want me to have a christian boyfriend”.
    the next week i found out he joined the basketball club and converted to christianity.
    for the whole week before to my birthday, he will give me a cake, like a WHOLE cake and he would sing happy birthday each day.
    then came the actual day of my birthday,
    i received a text message at midnight saying “come out to your balcony, i have a surprise for you.”
    i get out on my balcony and there was this big big box outside my gate. i was gonna go downstairs to go see what it was but suddenly the box BURST open, and there’s the guy standing there in his boxers screaming the birthday song at me.
    then i suddenly hear this “boomch chak boom boomch chak” and 2 other guys jump out in their boxers as well and start beatboxing. the guy who liked me started his rap.
    “yo, happy birthday to my bou bui (precious) xiu yan,
    you’re sap sam sui (thirteen years old), hou mm hou wan? (is it any fun?)
    if it’s no fun you can give me a try,
    ngo hor yi (i can) be your one and only guy!
    everytime i see you ngo sam bang bang tiu! (everytime i see you, my heart races)
    dan hai nei tai dou ngor dou mm choi mm diu!
    (but when you see me, you don’t care or give a shit.)
    don’t you want to be my girl?
    i can show u a whole new world!
    HAPPY BIRTHDAYYYYYYYYYYYYYY!”
    then all 3 of them run off away from my house.
    omg.
    the next day i got to school and one of his friends come and ask if i’ve accepted the guy. i said.. “no. he’s not my type.” his friend went and told him and this really upset him.
    we had PE first period on that day, so i brought my extra set of clothes in my gym bag ‘cos we were given 15 minutes to shower after PE. after i came back from recess, my gym bag with my dirty clothes was empty! i found a note inside my desk..
    “XY, you stole my heart and you won’t give it back to me! so in return, i stole your clothes. and i won’t give them back to you. i hope you will keep my heart forever like i’m keeping your clothes. i love you with my stolen heart.”
    [O_O]

  293. Back in form 3, I had a typical pretty and fair chinese girl friend, who had a typical Indian guy whose teeth shines in the dark as an admirer.. I’ll call him G.. We were all in the same class..
    One day we were chatting in class as usual, when we talked about some of the beliefs we know.. Then suddenly, G asked my friend if she knew about the belief that if you rub a strand of your hair together with another strand of hair from the guy/girl that you like, and if they stick together, it means you both have fate, else vice versa..
    Now, G always thought that my friend liked this other chinese guy who’s also in our class.. Let’s call him K.. Whether or not my friend really liked K, I don’t know.. But I’m sure she didn’t like G though !! So now, what do you think G would actually think of doing in order to try to desperately “please” my friend.. Uh huh, bingo baby..
    G asked my friend if she wanted to know whether she has fate with K.. And ta-da.. Before my friend could even stop G, he went over to K’s desk and practically pulled out a bunch of his hair. . Yep. Not ONE strand, but a bunch.. Ahh, wonderful scream from K.
    The next thing we knew, the typical thing typical boys like them in a typical you-hurt-me situation would do.. Is of course.. Hooray, gangster fight..
    But it wasn’t such a small case though, they actually called their own “tai-ko’s” who brought PARANGS along.. Imagine the look their face when they were told it all started because of a girl and a stupid belief. *applause* The “party” disbanded on the spot.
    My friend hardcore avoided G from that day onwards.. I would’ve too

  294. I had this admirer quite a number of years back. We had just started secondary school then.
    Up to now, he’s the admirer who’s been infatuated, for want of a better word, with me for the longest period of time: a whole year. The whole form knew of his crush on me, and they teased me mercilessly. He likes to tease and bully me, he wrote my nickname in pen on the side of his book, he told his older sister about me, showed her my picture, and once, during truth or dare, he even proposed to me to the shouts and cheers of the whole class! Stupidly enough, I didn’t get to see him on bended knees because I was closing my eyes due to embarrassment at that time :p News of it spread like wildfire; within mere minutes everyone knew. Oh, and this happened in my classroom which was only one floor above the class that the school’s strictest disciplinarian teacher was teaching at that time.
    It has always, always puzzled me as to how he liked me, since I was quite thin and very nerdy-looking back in the days.
    My friend, who was seated next to him (and I was in front of him), said he had a surprise for me, and asked me to guess the colour of it. I said blue. Nope, she said. It was red. He then proceeded to roll up his school uniform sleeve, during which I just turned away because…well…I was shy :p Everybody was absolutely OMG-ing at what he did. Because of all things, he actually carved my name onto his arm. With a blade.
    As for the coming part, I don’t know how true it exactly is, but this was what I heard: his best friend liked me for a short period of time as well. This apparently caused a rift between them. Both were supposed to transfer to another school together (by choice), but my admirer went first, while his bestie stayed back. Rumours had it that it was intentional to ‘get him out of the way’ O_o But later, he went as well.
    If that is true, I think we have two passengers abroad S. S. Desperate.
    The funny thing was, it has the most cliché ending ever. Said admirer used to talk over stuff about me with my friend, like when he’s hurt or he’s sad and all that. So after that year was over, guess who he ended up with?

  295. Confessions of a Kitchen Bitch
    It all started with food.
    I met this girl, L, in my first year of university. We were both living on-campus. She was lost and helpless, plus she was overloading subjects, so she ate nothing but instant noodles and microwaved nuggets and shit like that.
    So one day, I made her dinner. Soon I was cooking all her meals; she’d call me up at 3 a.m. saying she wanted pancakes! Then it progressed to doing all her chores for her – grocery shopping, laundry, cleaning her room. L never lifted a finger to help, claiming her hands were delicate.
    Everyone started smirking behind my back, especially since she made me wear a frilly pink apron that said “Kitchen Bitch” on it, because she thought it was cute. They all sneered at me, saying how unmanly I’d become – now I was her housewife, her maid, her slave, her bitch – her kitchen bitch!
    I didn’t care. Testosterone and machoism were no match for love.
    Then one day she dropped a bomb on me. She told me she had a crush on this guy in her class and had invited him home for dinner. Since she couldn’t cook, she begged me to cook a romantic meal – for HIM!!!
    I got the courage up to protest: “But don’t you know how I feel about you?? I thought you felt the same way!”
    Her reply was, “Oh. Er, well…can we discuss this after dinner? By the way, he likes roast lamb with mint sauce.”
    I think I heard my heart crack.
    And yet I ended up cooking the dinner for her after all, because she threatened to cry if I didn’t. Even now, I couldn’t bear to see her cry. For her, I made sure the roast lamb was tender and juicy, the mashed potatoes were smooth and rich, the…ah, you get the picture.
    After I’d finished cooking the last meal I would ever make her, I left. Later, L’s housemate told me that after the dinner, they went into her room, locked the door and turned off the lights. I was devastated.
    Well, sort of. You see, I’d crushed a heap of laxative pills into the mint sauce. The gossip later flew around uni that they had some unexpectedly wet and gooey action during a particularly…reciprocal…position (think a certain double-digit number). Her floormate told me the stench lingered in the dorm for days.
    Revenge is yummy.

  296. Romeo,Juliet & a Desperado
    It was all because of my model wannabe dream..
    “You’ve got a new friend request!” Without hesitating, I approved it. Little
    do i know that it will be a decision that would totally turn my world upside
    down, a mistake that would made me regret for the whole 2years of my
    life….
    And so we chatted on msn for quite a while..
    “Are you interested in becoming the model for this magazine?” he typed. “Oo
    gosh,I am!” I replied.
    So we head on to the discussion part of it. He asked me for my handphone
    number,I gave him my house phone instead. Imagine talking on the phone for
    hours,my parents ain’t blind or deaf..
    Then,he actually talked to my parents and told them about the whole thing.
    Surprisingly,they did not said no.
    After that,he asked me out to see me in real person. Initially,it was
    supposed to be a 1on1 session but it ended up a 4 person foosball game (both of us brought a friend along,so it was quite relaxing+fun). He did took some picture of me.
    Few days later,he told me that his company has agreed to reqruit me and joked that its because I look like a human hybrid (in his company’s people eyes,I can resemble the 3races in m’sia:)
    fair=chinese, big eyes+long lashes=malays+indian, face feature=indian
    He got me a contract as well.. Everything is black and white on the paper..
    “This is real” i thought myself . I told Romeo and he thinks its pretty
    awesome too..
    “Do you know the measurement of your body?”
    “Nope”
    “I’ll help u with it then”…
    My friend assured me that it isn’t a hoax,considering the fact that he
    manage to persuade my parents too.
    “Ok”
    So we went out again..
    “Can we get to the changing room to do this?”
    “Do you know that,to become a model,you have to be quite open?”
    “Sorry to say this,but can u take off your clothes except your underwear?”
    I’ve come this far,it’s just one last step and there.. my life long dream,plus
    i could shout if anything happens,there is so many people out there.. (it was in the Tropicana Life shop)
    besides its no different than wearing a bikini.. Nothing really happened
    back there..
    “Muaxx.. Love you darling! see ya in school tomorrow” i ended the call with
    Romeo.
    But later on,my phone rang again..
    “Yes darling?” i asked
    “heyyy honeyy~”
    Wait.. that’s not Romeo,it’s….
    “sorry i was wrong”
    “why? why wouldn’t you be my darling?”
    “Im taken!”
    “so…. can you be my pet sister?”
    Since then, “hey sis,where are u now? what are u doing? who are u with now? Can I come,can I come along?
    I’ll come fetch you!”
    He’s interrogating me..
    “Im just being caring of you,you are my sister mar? No secret between brother and sister right?”
    Im supposed to tell him exactly where+who+what im doing.. n he had been giving the same old reason everytime..
    I was annoyed and gave up on his call.. Everyday,there is at least 50 missed
    calls (Velocity=30/hour) my phone would rang until the battery runs out..
    “JULIETTTT…!! JULIETTT…!!! JULIETTT..!!! DARLING SISTER!! IM HERE!!”
    ” MIRROR MIRROR ON THE WINDOW,WHO’S THE ONE BEHIND THE WINDOW? ”
    (that voice was so loud+high pitch that it could be heard around the whole neighbourhood,possibly breaking the glass too)
    I peeked out of my window..
    (even my neighbours-ten houses away had been doing the same)
    he kept shouting and shouting until 1of my neighbour was so fed up n shouted back
    ” SHUT UP YOU EVIL QUEEN!! ”
    “OH MY GOD! how did he knew where I stay?”
    all right,my friend is along with him as well…….
    I DON’T WANA SEE HIM…(after all my effort+electricity wasted to recharge the phone)
    plus,It’s a sunday,my parents are at home!
    (apparently,they are watching World of The World which was also equivalently
    loud)
    I wet my head,messed up my hair and shirt,grabbed some hand wash liquid,put it on and
    wrap around with a towel..
    “I am in the middle of a shower”
    “Why aren’t u picking up my calls??”
    “ouch!! my eyes hurt,i had to go back to bath now..ouch!!”
    later that night,I was on messenger..
    ” heeeyyy Juliettt~ ”
    (i was supposed to appear off9 but he saw me stil)
    “hey,im kinda sleepy already,so good night! ”
    “wait! i got something for u!” he said
    he was offline after he said that.. yeay! some peace for me!
    I heard a knock at my glass door.. the knock was getting furious..
    (someone is there at my balcony)
    I grabbed my squash racquet…
    slowly…I opened the door and saw a bowl of goldfish???
    I was staring at the goldfish.. suddenly,
    “SURPRISE!!!”
    I was shocked to death… (almost)
    As he was trying to swing himself like Tarzan into the balcony after hanging at the bar
    (for drying clothes..so that he’s unseen to me),
    one of his feet stepped into the bowl of goldfish he placed on the floor earlier on,
    his leg fitted perfectly and was stucked..
    (he was bare footed..maybe because of his attempt to climb up the balcony? why didn’t the bowl break? i don’t know >.

  297. My family consists of me, my little brother and my parents. When we ( me and my little brother) were young, our parents constantly hired nannies and maids for us. There was once a maid, Chinese-Indonesian woman who hitting hard for my dad. She has a crush on my dad, rumours spread to our neighbours and things got complicated. My mum knew and she was jealous at 1st but then she soon took it as a humour. Why? It’s because she’s older than my mum around my dad’s age and not only that she looks similar as a monkey (sorry to say this..-__- really am sorry) . Not that I wanna say bad and impolite things but if you could get a monkey’s face and just change the eyes to a human one.. yeah that’s her. Similar as the ‘poster’ about George Bush and the Monkey which is about Bush’s similar behaviour with a Monkey. It’s because she has this upper teeth structure which made her mouth look similar as a monkey. Not only that, her lower teeth are always filled with chewed food especially green vegetables in between. Her body is almost similar as my grandmamma’s but I prefer looking at my grandmamma’s than hers. I have no idea why too.
    So yeah continue..
    She will automatically serve my dad drinks right after he comes back from work everyday. Constantly look at him and what ever my dad ordered her to do anything she will do it no matter what compare to my mum. Besides that, the most freaky thing she did was wearing make up and lipstick which the colors doesn’t suits her.. maybe because of her face doesn’t suit make up.. or maybe i think too much.. (-.-)So one day she suddenly came up to me and ask me questions about English. (Oh yeah we communicate using Chinese and for my brother and me in Bahasa. Both us siblings are like BANANAs) She asked me how to translate some words, each day words that asked are different. Once I asked her what were the words for, she answered me: “Saya belajar Ing-lish”
    Then one day, my dad received this letter from her.
    To man big house
    Kepada lelaki besar rumah
    Hope you understand what I write.
    Harap awak faham apa saya tulis.
    I want words with you. I very like you.
    Saya mahu kata dengan awak. Saya sangat suka awak.
    Eyes you shining and smile you sweet always bright and happy I
    Mata awak bersinar dan senyum awak manis selalu cerah dan gembira saya.
    You ask I do what like song beautiful. Voice you cute always give I energy and I wife you.
    Awak suruh saya buat apa macam lagu cantik. Suara awak comel selalu beri saya semangat dan saya isteri awak.
    I will do all what you ask. I very happy together you here. God make I with you.
    Saya akan buat semua apa awak suruh. Saya sangat gembira bersama awak sini. Tuhan buat saya sama awak.
    I want together you long long. I wait you and no broken energy.
    Saya mahu bersama awak lama lama. Saya tunggu awak dan tidak putus semangat.
    I want give happy for you and together you serve and give drinks and food you like.
    Saya mahu beri gembira untuk awak dan bersama awak layan dan beri minuman dan makanan awak suka.
    I know you same together I like I. I will like you long long.
    Saya tahu awak sama dengan saya suka saya. Saya akan suka awak lama lama.
    Hope you do what in heart and you like I long long like I like you long long.
    Harap awak buat apa dalam hati dan awak suka saya lama lama macam saya suka awak lama lama.
    From Yu Yuan
    Daripada Yu Yuan
    Immediately after my dad read that, he fired her. I guess he was too freaked out.

  298. It’s 11pm now and i think i must at least write something and try to win the
    looked like chocolate LG handphone !
    Ok..
    Frankly, i think my skill in courting girl is super bad..but i have my own skill
    that im not going to use it anymore..so i hope u wont use my skill as well
    and to all the readers that are reading..never ever ‘try’ it at anywhere
    ok..i’ll divide all my skills so that u can see how my skill makes me scare away
    a girl that i “admire” or what we call “like/love”
    i started to “admire” a cute cute adorable pretty girl when i was in primary6
    and i started to “admire” another girl after i failed to court the 1st girl due to
    some reason.
    ok let me cut the crap and start my story
    here it goes…
    1st girl is a cute girl in one of our SJK Chung Hwa No.X
    and she is always the school’s admirer
    i have my own skill and my..
    1st skill is to make her notice or know that there’s a guy, that is me exist in this
    beautiful lovely adorable school
    of coz as a normal kid wearing short pants when we’re primary school
    we always want to make our shorts longer by pulling it as down as possible
    it makes me ‘hip hop’ after we’ve grown up ‘abit’ at least so that i looked
    fashion and following the trend in our school
    But unfortunately, my skill doesnt work at all
    after i make sure my pants looked very fashion then i will walked in front of her
    and spy at her and see where she is everytime
    i can even know what class she is having at that time and purposely
    walked pass by her class so that he will see a special guy like me together of course
    with my “lousy” friend just like how u call your friend hehe =)
    well..this skill started to work i think haha i think she noticed me already
    so i moved on to my 2nd skill
    My ..
    2nd skill is to try to know her although it is hard for people ‘looked shy and normal
    but talkative”
    i tried to know her friends through all kind of skill and befriend with her close
    friend so that she will know me one day and accept me as her friend !
    But i think this skill works also because i am her friend’s friend and i can
    one day be her friend MUAHAHAHAHAHA
    i get all her information like home address…house phone number…information
    abour her like what she likes to eat..what she colours she likes..what kind
    of guy he likes…LOL man ! what ‘s her D.O.B ….where she lives..i even know
    i try to understand her…
    i also asked one of my buddy to call her to disturb her like saying
    do u love”someone” to see whether she has any lover or not
    but..the result is always equal to HANGING UP THE PHONE IMMEDIATELY
    in order to know her more “deeply” i tried this “stupid” skill
    i sneaked into her class one day after school due to the extra class
    and it was NOT my idea..i tell u frankly, kenny ! it is my friend’s idea lah !
    ok..the reason he wanted to asked me to go into the classroom is to check
    her desk and see what she has !
    So stupid la..i go follow my “lousy friend’ idea.
    i went to her place and tried to investigate what she has ! and i found out that
    she likes WINNIE THE POOH !!!!!!!!!
    yeah baby i shouted to myself MUHAHAHAHAHA
    i can draw picture for her at least to make her know me !
    Well, it’s time i got the “balasan” for going into the classroom and my gangs
    tried to play a trick on me by saying teacher is coming in and they all
    ran out of the classroom ..i think they purposely do it ! sigh..wat kind of friend
    Of course as a normal guy like me..i 100% run la! if u, kenny..u will run right ?
    but the problem now is im too fat at that time..! 60 plus kg and 150+cm
    i call that obese !
    SO, when i ran out of the classroom because of my “too nervouse / kanchiong”
    i fell down and i think that’s the worst thing in my life…because i broke my arm !
    and i still remember..they thought i was like making fun laying down on the floor
    screaming at them with pain…i was so in pain..but they thought i was joking !
    what the hAck la !
    Now..I cant draw her Winnie the POOH and im going to face my UPSR la !
    just 1 month left ! and ….i was send to the General Hospital
    and i regretted for choosing General Hospital because the people there
    are “snails” ..they dont care about u at all..i had to wait for few hours imagine
    u’re in pain and they need to look for a specialist to see u
    i’ was at there around 2pm and waited until 5pm !
    the next day in school..i looked so special with cement wrapping my hand
    Not SEMEN ok ! i guessed she noticed me because i looked special
    well..back to the topic..luckily….i was able to sit for my UPSR and
    during my “broke one arm life” it is the best..because i can order people to
    do things ! haha
    again..back to story..! i managed to draw Winnie The Pooh for her and it looks
    great although it’s my first drawing to my admirer using my first ‘virgin’ hand
    to produce the 1st picture in my history !
    after i drew the Winnie The Pooh i put it in her desk ! i hope she knows that
    it was me who sent / put the picture in her desk !
    until..i left the school..i have no time to tell her the whole thing
    and i havent talk to her at all in my whole life..
    if i have the chance to talk to her…im going to say ‘hi’ at least
    because i’ve broke my arm and i got no chance to say anything or know her
    at all..
    SIGH !

  299. Some people go to the extreme when they are desperate to win your heart. My true story is rather tragic as I called it than humourous in any way. This girl had a crush on me since Primary 4. She sent me a confession letter then to tell me that she liked me. Me being a 10 year old kid, immature and naïve, just could not digest something extreme like that. Well, I don’t really like her and have always treat her as a friend. That’s when the whole crazy thing started. I think she just won’t give up and the rejection is totally ignored!
    She would do extreme things like sending me greeting cards during major festivals with just her surname on it and requested friends with the same surname as her to deliver to me. Then gave them specific instructions to tell me the next day it was actually from her! She would use the same tactic as well for giving me birthday presents so I will accept them! She would make calls to my house every night or so and hanged it up when it was not answered by me. She will even be at some friends house and ask them to sweet talk with me about her and later she will take over the phone!
    We had actually many close friends between us in class and it got on my nerve that she used them to get me to receive her as my girlfriend. The worst thing is she had been spreading rumours about me actually have a crush on her. Therefore, people around us thought that I was always the one who had secretly love her. She is basically an extreme in-your-nightmare stalker!
    By secondary school, she still never give up hope! In secondary four, she had a boyfriend. I was so damn happy! It is about time! I hope this boyfriend will be the person to help her forget about me. I had tried to avoid talking to her since the day she sent me the letter in primary four and all those crazy attempts to win my heart. Still as we got more matured in secondary school, I thought I could forget the whole thing and try to be just normal friends.
    I was so wrong, she would ask me to do sick things like visualizing her in wedding dresses and drew it. She even goes to such extremes as asking her boyfriend to beg me to do it! Crazy shit! Who in the world do that? I had no choice but to give in since the boyfriend said he loved her so much and asked me to do as she requested. I did it for his sake! Few years later, she would call me out to tell her boyfriend personally that she wanted to break up with him! Sick! She was begging me and I had to do it for whatever reasons. After leaving secondary school, I never wanted to look back and wanted to avoid her totally until today. I suffered from 10 years old all the way through secondary school because of her. I don’t even have any appetite to start a love relationship.

  300. Kenny im guessing isabelle is gone too since ive got her dicky hip and i saw u in front of me in an s class and her blinged out s600 was in front of montage with the door open, i cant live like this anymore i cant live a lie anymore, please help me, my dad has already come over and said its getting tight and he came shook the mat to tell me he was taking the trash out so nothing surprises me anymore
    So Kenny Wilson sia 1111 aka erskine do hut, please help me.
    Mark O’Neil
    619 756 1496

  301. i really love this phone my brother gave me this fone but it was bloked and i love it sooo much this is the only fancied ever in my whole life and i hope i win it because my dad said he is not going to buy me it

  302. ohhh myy… goddd most imbarasing thing of my life…//there was this guy he was hot and im hot and he thought i didn’t like him but i had a major crush on him// he like came up to me and was trying to ask me out he said..u me go now.. and im like wtf and then he’s like would you go out with me and i said no///… cause i had a bf at the time.. and i went into the washroom and he followed me into the wash room … and meanwhile likkee at 2*50 he like was waiting outside the bathroom door and i had to liike sneak out the window and then like in the morning…. he wa still there when i went to school and i woke him up and he kissed me and asked me again..then i said yes and then he mooned the whole school and said to the princabal IN YOUR FACE BITCH.. and mooned his bumm to the princabal… and he got suspended for it….. but hes my baby boo…

  303. I see that you are experienced at your field! I will be starting a website next week, and this information will be very useful for me… thank you for all your help and i’m wishing you all the success in your business! 🙂

  304. Man, talk about a fantastic post! I’ve stumbled across your blog a few times within the past, but I always forgot to save it. But not again! Thanks for posting the way you do, I truly love seeing someone who actually has an opinion and isn’t just regurgitating crap like nearly all other bloggers today. Keep it up!

  305. i’ve fallen in love with the white chocolate already ,i really wanna win really really badly coz it’s features are juz tt awesome +my current lg juz got unlucky and went totally black and hs a huge running ugly colour leak i think
    so please i’d really really love very much if i was one of the few winners of it too
    thnks

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