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31 October 2006
Short Talk:
Blog plug of the day: Monochromatix shows you how to do a traditional Halloween Jack-o-latterns... with my face on it. He calls it Ken-o-lattern. Now that's scary.
Welcome To Hell
In New Zealand, if you want to eat pizzas, you can go to Hell.
No wait! Don't shut down this window! I wasn't scolding you!
What I mean is... there's this very popular pizza chain store in New Zealand. And it's called Hell.
The pizza business is very competitive in NZ. With the dominating Pizza Hut, Pizza Haven and Domino's all vying for the slice of the pie pizza in the market, the consumers are literally spoilt for choice.
Already, pizza prices are as low as they can get due to hellacious competition. Newcomers can only dream of making ends meet. To get themselves noticed, someone gotta come up with something different.
Even Hell has opening hours. Cannot anyhow come at anytime one you know?
Along comes Hell Pizzas with a pretty interesting concept that sets itself apart from the rest.
I paid a visit to Hell when I was in New Zealand.
This is what Hell looks like.
What the hell? Looks pretty normal to me leh. A far cry from the underworld of pain and suffering Haw Par Villa wants me to believe. Cheh, bluff people one.
But then I got a chuckle out of the brochure they handed out.
Instead of "Delivery", they have "Deliverance".
Instead of "All Rights Reserved", they have "All Wrongs Reserved".
Their hotline number is 0800 666 111, and they call it Hell Emergency. ("666" is the biblical number of the Anti-Christ and "111" is the number to dial for emergency in New Zealand.)
Hell, even their pizzas are wickedly named.
You don't get Hawaiian Supreme or stuff like that here. Instead, Hell has got a wide selection of pizzas, including a series named after the 7 deadly sins.
In Hell, you can walk in and ask for Trouble and no one's gonna laugh at you. But if you do that in Malaysia, you're gonna leave the shop with a set of broken teeth.
Amazingly, you can even order Holy Water in Hell.
I ordered a "Wrath" just for the hell of it, and it came in this kind of pizza box.
Hypersensitive people will look at it and go "WHOA! SUAY AH! GOT COFFIN ONE!" Actually, I find it very humourous.
Their pizza tastes pretty yummy too.
Best of all, when I finished the delicious pizza, the side of the box asked me to "dispose of the evidence". Hehe.
Props up to the Kiwis for coming up with something so creative and funny. It makes me wonder if a similar concept can be brought over to Malaysia.
Behold, Hell Kolo Mee!
Hmmm... probably not. :P
Happy Halloween, everybody!
:: Posted by Kenny at 7:36 PM | Link | Facebook It
:: Categorised as 'New Zealand'
117 Comments:
first,nice try by nz
Posted by: I'm A Chicken With No Name. BWAK BWAK BWAK! at 31 October 2006 7:40 PM | Link to comment
lol funny...
Posted by: bogan at 31 October 2006 7:43 PM | Link to comment
2nd!Yup! HELL PIZZA tastes the best in NZ! u've got good taste,Kenny!
Posted by: Baby CaChaReL at 31 October 2006 7:44 PM | Link to comment
lol.. yup, yup,
hell's pizza..
Posted by: stef at 31 October 2006 7:49 PM | Link to comment
Hahaha..
how abt hell char koay tiew?
Posted by: Popoko at 31 October 2006 7:51 PM | Link to comment
go to Heaven instead of Hell
Posted by: Andy Law at 31 October 2006 7:56 PM | Link to comment
oh that looks fun.
and as for hell kolo mee. hahah....i doubt it, but hey, who knows till someone tries it.
Posted by: Lainie at 31 October 2006 7:58 PM | Link to comment
Hahaha...this is a good one, kenny! but i like the design for the Hell Pizza place....very unique!
Posted by: VinCOol at 31 October 2006 8:08 PM | Link to comment
Why don they create a place call Heaven pizza instead of Hell? Hell is such a horrible place...ugh.. but it's pretty interesting tho. Hope msia don hav such stall. Scares me lah.
Posted by: Jenny at 31 October 2006 8:11 PM | Link to comment
i meant the pizza place is pretty interesting. Not Hell ah.
Posted by: Jenny at 31 October 2006 8:12 PM | Link to comment
Do you have to put that photo of Kolo mee there? It never fails to trigger my cravings for wan tan mee. Pizza looks yummy though! :D
Posted by: Lina Lok at 31 October 2006 8:12 PM | Link to comment
KENNY!! YOU MAKE ME HUNGRY LAH!
GRRR...
Posted by: uglyfatchick at 31 October 2006 8:16 PM | Link to comment
I was thinking of Char Kway Teow with extra bloody hums...
Posted by: lakeside girl at 31 October 2006 8:25 PM | Link to comment
u know,i couldn't sleep because of that stupid ken-o-pumpkin...
I am making them to sell next year,cuz we don't have halloween, I'll sell at our chinese halloween in mid july....
Posted by: Andrew Ho at 31 October 2006 8:26 PM | Link to comment
The last one looked kinda scary!!! But seriously.. with all the tradisional ppl over in Malaysia, a cool shop like Hell wont make it over here.. =( Sounds interesting though!
Posted by: -Princess Shin- at 31 October 2006 8:32 PM | Link to comment
Looks like HELL KITCHEN concept to me....
http://www.fox.com/hellskitchen/
except the hell pizza packaging is wicked sick
Posted by: I'm A Chicken With No Name. BWAK BWAK BWAK! at 31 October 2006 8:39 PM | Link to comment
hello kenny! maybe you could start a hell kolo mee stall and make them REALLY REALLY REALLY SPICY!! hahahh
Posted by: ghimhwee at 31 October 2006 8:43 PM | Link to comment
Wow nice tie-in to Halloween! Was wondering why your NZ travel log appeared so late.
Posted by: Danielle at 31 October 2006 8:43 PM | Link to comment
I recall the box folds into a coffin so you can keep the "remains" for another day. If you keep it for too long though, it starts to rot in hell. So Gluttony helps. Happy Hell-O-Ween!
Posted by: Kurt at 31 October 2006 8:46 PM | Link to comment
nice pizza from HELL! the Devil will love it =))
wicked idea about HELL Kolo mee too hahax. Hmm.. let me guess, the joss paper could double up as tissuse paper as well? XD
would u eat from the spoon placed above the joss paper o.O? =X
Posted by: liang-zai at 31 October 2006 8:46 PM | Link to comment
haahaha .. LOL very funny hell pizza look good but hell kolo mee ....... malaysia never can have this kind of stall la
Posted by: liban at 31 October 2006 8:50 PM | Link to comment
LOL~! Let's make it Hell Bakuteh better eh?
Posted by: wong at 31 October 2006 8:54 PM | Link to comment
Gosh.. You make me so hungry for pizza! Look at all the yummy toppings. If they open a chain in China, sure no business. Haha. Everything's black.
Posted by: Eve at 31 October 2006 9:03 PM | Link to comment
at least the salad names are normal
Posted by: Eve at 31 October 2006 9:04 PM | Link to comment
There’s no more pizza haven in NZ now.
And if I am not mistaken Hell’s pizza is a OZ franchise..
Posted by: Viv at 31 October 2006 9:16 PM | Link to comment
er... Viv ur totally wrong. Hell's pizza originated from wellington. the first ever hells pizza shop is sumwhere near victoria uni. i know cos i work in this shitty restaurant. love ur kolo mee kenny!
Posted by: andrew at 31 October 2006 9:24 PM | Link to comment
WEIJIE LOVES LINGMIN
Posted by: LWJ at 31 October 2006 9:27 PM | Link to comment
your hell kolo mee short of candles.
Posted by: eds at 31 October 2006 9:31 PM | Link to comment
You should place Don't shut down this window!" before the pic la, lol...
By the way, what music did they play in Hell? And how did the staff dress?
Posted by: EA Cheng at 31 October 2006 9:35 PM | Link to comment
Kenny don't tell me you went to KY cafe, order a kolo mee and purposely put the hell note so u can take the pic Lol. Oh its from the funeral ceremony of your late grandpa last time.
Posted by: ccb at 31 October 2006 9:37 PM | Link to comment
o mo na! na mit cho so?
Posted by: meekiee at 31 October 2006 9:44 PM | Link to comment
Hell Kolomee? Then I think the waiter/tress should burn it into ash then we baru can eat bor.
Posted by: Nonnie at 31 October 2006 9:57 PM | Link to comment
Hey dude, great finale.When I was in college, a Malaysian student wrote a cultural essay mentioning Hell money, the professor was puzzled " Don't you guys go to Heaven ? "
Posted by: e at 31 October 2006 9:58 PM | Link to comment
next time call for delivery. check the receipt. hehe. pretty funny stuff there, too.
Posted by: zara at 31 October 2006 10:35 PM | Link to comment
and i think when u call in they greet u with, "hi you've reached hell" or somethinggg like dat la
Posted by: zara at 31 October 2006 10:38 PM | Link to comment
lolol.the gin chua and kolo mee...LOL
Posted by: agu at 31 October 2006 10:39 PM | Link to comment
Hell Kolo Mee, nice one haha!
Posted by: LeongSoon at 31 October 2006 10:39 PM | Link to comment
Choy!!!!! Keep the whatever you call it paper away!!!
Posted by: Moonfish at 31 October 2006 10:45 PM | Link to comment
Sigh, "Hell" casts such a deep impression on me, I thought I seen "Double deals from Hell" when I saw the Dell offer... :-P
Posted by: EA Cheng at 31 October 2006 11:00 PM | Link to comment
WAHH!! I wanna go to Hell!! LOL.
I love pizzas.. T_T
2nd best food in the world. =D
Posted by: Kei at 31 October 2006 11:41 PM | Link to comment
Looks very delicious
Posted by: James at 31 October 2006 11:52 PM | Link to comment
Haha this is funny! :D
But better to go to Heaven lar.
Posted by: Addy at 01 November 2006 12:12 AM | Link to comment
i reckon u should have sticked that chopsticks onto the kolo mee in the upright position.
Posted by: Jr at 01 November 2006 12:20 AM | Link to comment
The last picture looks like those in chinese horror movie.
Posted by: Vincent Chow at 01 November 2006 12:24 AM | Link to comment
I actually know some devout Christians who would refuse to be customers of such a satanic business LOL :D *eye roll*
Posted by: Minny at 01 November 2006 12:37 AM | Link to comment
okay. THAT is so cool~
izzit good pizza izzit good pizza?
looks good tho. mmmm....
Posted by: uv3h !h at 01 November 2006 1:18 AM | Link to comment
wahseh!
your hell kolo mee...waiyer...scary man..
Posted by: vss3t at 01 November 2006 1:24 AM | Link to comment
walao kenny..u really got the balls..so dare to bring hell notes to kopitiam and took pic with ther kolo mee...
Posted by: ting at 01 November 2006 1:25 AM | Link to comment
haha .. i love domino more !!
Posted by: sally at 01 November 2006 2:13 AM | Link to comment
The pizzas looked really good. And yes, the Hell Kolo Mee is hilarious! :)
Posted by: Kyle at 01 November 2006 2:22 AM | Link to comment
kenny,i like u mann! u've got the attitude..
i wonder whats the public's reactions if we really have Hell selling kolo mee..and ur last photo's really funny!
Posted by: elaine -intoxicated- at 01 November 2006 2:37 AM | Link to comment
yeah man....Greed and Gluttony is one of their nicest!! Well to me tho....
Posted by: kiwikia at 01 November 2006 4:29 AM | Link to comment
Wah, if you do that in Msia, everybody will slaughter u! Hahaha. Imagine going to a 'hell' kolo mee store, and order one 'hell' kolo mee, then they ask for pay. So, you know what you do? Pay with hell notes lor :) Hahah~
Posted by: Adam at 01 November 2006 5:47 AM | Link to comment
Hell's Pizza is the best!! Pizza Hut etc can't compare. BUT... all important question for the guy who works there... do they do funky things to the pizzas behind our backs like picking noses and dropping the dough?
Posted by: An at 01 November 2006 6:10 AM | Link to comment
If you watch Full Metal Alchemist(anime)... Most of the pizza names are the characters name
Posted by: Fumoffu at 01 November 2006 7:09 AM | Link to comment
i dun think it'd be damn weird to do that, as in bring hell notes n joss stick to a public area and take a picture of that. o.o I think it's photoshopped?
Posted by: Celestina at 01 November 2006 7:30 AM | Link to comment
am a Hell Pizza lover which means am from NZ!
seldom go to domino's and pizza hut anymore!
btw, pizza haven is replaced by domino's pizza!
Posted by: bunny at 01 November 2006 7:32 AM | Link to comment
Lust would be good...
ROFL...
anyway, u try bring e concept to malaysia n u confirm close shop one lor...
cos asians generally more pandang mah...
who wans to kena cursed?
Posted by: Wei De at 01 November 2006 7:34 AM | Link to comment
hahaha...furnee picture!!!!!!!!
Posted by: crystalite at 01 November 2006 7:39 AM | Link to comment
LOL...wanna order d Hell Kolok Mee..:)
Posted by: LadyBird at 01 November 2006 7:53 AM | Link to comment
That's my favourite Pizza Franchise when I was living there. Loved the Brimstone pizza. I don't think the franchise will work in Malaysia la, too Taboo. Unless you call it UMNO Pizza
Posted by: Ronald at 01 November 2006 7:54 AM | Link to comment
Fumoffu,
Here, read this (http://en.wikipedia.org/wiki/Seven_deadly_sins) before ignorantly saying that the pizza names came from the characters in Full Metal Alchemist anime. *roll eyes*
Kenny, great post :)
Posted by: Jo at 01 November 2006 8:04 AM | Link to comment
u are the best, kenny!
Posted by: muffins at 01 November 2006 8:59 AM | Link to comment
In norway we have a small town that is actually called Hell. They also have a small train station that handles freight and passengers. The freight station is called "Gods Expedition", which means "freight handling" in norwegian.
http://en.wikipedia.org/wiki/Hell,_Norway
Posted by: vidar at 01 November 2006 10:05 AM | Link to comment
Where exactly is this HELL place in NZ?
I didn't see one when I was staying in Auckland. But, the concept is damn good. Evil.
Oh, btw, if you were to go to Rotorua, there's a place call Hell's Gate Thermal Reserve where you can experience NZ's natural spring and volcano wonders. Take a dip in the hellish volcano mud spa for some heaven in hell
Posted by: Karen C at 01 November 2006 10:11 AM | Link to comment
Okay so when I go to NZ for any random reason I got to visit hell. Wow it so amazing. Sins for pizzas? haha :D
Posted by: Mandy at 01 November 2006 10:15 AM | Link to comment
Wahlau eh! Like that also got one ah?
Hmm...Nasi Lemak Neraka anyone?
Posted by: pablopabla at 01 November 2006 10:33 AM | Link to comment
Eat pizza and go to hell... that's new.
Posted by: Aoshi at 01 November 2006 10:50 AM | Link to comment
HELL KOLO MEE????I THINK NOBODY WILL IN KCH.
Posted by: HORNY ANG MOH at 01 November 2006 11:27 AM | Link to comment
er... hey visit their website for their location. its almost evrywhere in nz man. Almost.
Posted by: andrew at 01 November 2006 12:03 PM | Link to comment
What are the toppings for "WRATH" actually? I see olive, capsicum, pepperoni and cheese, what else? It does look yummy!
Posted by: Jess at 01 November 2006 12:27 PM | Link to comment
I'll definitely go for the Gluttony. Pizza Hut and Dominos is for college students.
Posted by: Liew at 01 November 2006 1:12 PM | Link to comment
OH MY GAWDD..! thats so damn cool, y melbourne dont have? then i could go there.... haha,+ very nice ending made this time, i actually laughed out this time.. best ending ever.. heheeh
Posted by: mying at 01 November 2006 1:31 PM | Link to comment
oh man..hell pizza vs the hell kolo mee in kuching
using your website..im your 'hell kolo mee' will win. So, kenny go and open a stall and sell this 'hell kolo mee'
u will maybe make more money than the 'pizza from hell'
Posted by: lianshen at 01 November 2006 2:42 PM | Link to comment
This is why I like you better than Xiaxue, your humor is international. Keep it going!
Posted by: KuchikiRukia at 01 November 2006 3:07 PM | Link to comment
Yar right kenny, try that kim zua and joss sticks on kolo mee and see if the boss get whack or not...hahas
Posted by: Gs at 01 November 2006 3:13 PM | Link to comment
Cant get a pizza with mountainous topping of ham here in Malaysia unless you make it yourself.... sigh.... That was what I love about the pizzas from the mamma and pappa's cafe in Australia.... never even ventured into pizza hut, pizza haven or dominos cos the amount of ham in those chain ones are miniscule.
Posted by: FutsalParty at 01 November 2006 3:16 PM | Link to comment
PAHAHAHA
That's friggin FUNNY AS!
Posted by: Suraya at 01 November 2006 3:37 PM | Link to comment
muahahahha....i wudnt want a kolomee like that... i'm a typical kuching-ite, a typical kolomee lover..
wish i'll hv the chance to eat sumday at that HELL restaurant.
nice day everyone!
Posted by: bjk at 01 November 2006 5:19 PM | Link to comment
Crazy! hahaha Put "gin chuah" as tissue! lol That was a lil freaky. :D
Posted by: Kuchingite27 at 01 November 2006 5:46 PM | Link to comment
your hell kolomee shop only open in july of chinese calendar?
Posted by: yoyo at 01 November 2006 8:45 PM | Link to comment
ONE HELL OF A POST.
Posted by: Satan at 01 November 2006 9:11 PM | Link to comment
Bet it's really the holy water from Hell. I didn't know Satan is such a great cook. :)
Posted by: :) at 01 November 2006 9:25 PM | Link to comment
wtf man !!!! The paper money used as Tissue ! that is super freaky okay !
Posted by: Herman at 01 November 2006 10:48 PM | Link to comment
Ordering at HELL PIZZA must be weird.
"Hello there. I want lust."
Also, how can you possibly comment about the food ?
"Wow, lust tastes great !"
HMmmmmmmm......... XO
Posted by: Nicevil at 01 November 2006 10:53 PM | Link to comment
Cool pizza place...I like the way they use the Hell idea..ha ha...I'm sure it's "hell" of a lot better then sucky pizza hut in Malaysia :)
Posted by: MrDurian at 01 November 2006 10:55 PM | Link to comment
Satan got bored and opened a pizza shop! Angels don't seem to cook as well the Desolate One, it seems. ;)
Posted by: Unladen Swallow at 01 November 2006 11:32 PM | Link to comment
Very Nice blog.
Could you also kindly add my web link into your blog page, thanks.
- DANIEL
from Singapore
http://www.eknowledgemarketplace.com/
Posted by: daniel at 02 November 2006 12:28 AM | Link to comment
Man... like I'm not hungry enough, seeing these pictures makes me crave for one juicy slice myself... :D
Posted by: Sakura at 02 November 2006 5:16 AM | Link to comment
Jo,
Who's ignorant?
I just mentioned that the names are the same I didn't say they took it from there. *shakes head*
Damn tool!
Posted by: Fumoffu at 02 November 2006 6:12 AM | Link to comment
Surprised with NZ creativeness... Wish to try the delicious pizza there...
Once you open kolo mee stall, I'm sure that many "lam mo loh"(chinese priest) will visit your stall...hehe..
Posted by: Ivy at 02 November 2006 8:15 AM | Link to comment
mayb no human will eat the hell kolomee.. but they'll buy it for worshiping during ghost feast season. u can try sell this idea =P
Posted by: frank at 02 November 2006 10:48 AM | Link to comment
i'm studying in NZ, and Hell's pizza tastes heavenly~it's pricier,but sure worth the sinful indulgence..they even have dessert pizzas with blueberry and choc topping, how awesome is that!
Posted by: Fiona at 02 November 2006 11:06 AM | Link to comment
Wei Kenny, kim chua is for heaven one lar... Should put gin chua, but dunno whether you'll walk away with that... Hehe
Posted by: EA Cheng at 02 November 2006 11:36 AM | Link to comment
COOL!!! waiting for it to come to singapore... but... very difficult ar..
Posted by: Indulgent Princess at 02 November 2006 11:48 AM | Link to comment
happy halloween may ur day be filled with scaring little kiddies and stealing their candy...cute pizza boxx...coffin...remains...hah
Posted by: doiiness at 02 November 2006 12:00 PM | Link to comment
are those...joss sticks as chopsticks?
omg, damn freaky! wouldnt mind trying though.
Eat Kolo Mee and go to HELL!!
Posted by: luzzio at 02 November 2006 12:40 PM | Link to comment
they have pizzas in hell!
even kolomee!
Posted by: yy <3 at 02 November 2006 3:56 PM | Link to comment
haha! it was just in the news today--hells pizza dumped condoms with the hell pizza packaging into people's mailboxes, and this kid found them, the mom was annoyed-lovely advertising:pizza AND safe sex..and apparently burger king is trying to buy hell.
Posted by: genie at 02 November 2006 5:10 PM | Link to comment
cool~ very own malaysia's HELL kolo mee~!!! should really build on that idea.... hmm...
Posted by: Jun at 02 November 2006 8:02 PM | Link to comment
Hell kompian got or not? Haha...
Posted by: Neo at 02 November 2006 11:59 PM | Link to comment
hell rice rooollll!! XD XD XD
Posted by: rice roll at 03 November 2006 12:34 AM | Link to comment
If Hell Pizza starts here in malaysia, ppl will pay hell money for it. Opps
Posted by: mybabybay at 03 November 2006 11:41 AM | Link to comment
LOL..that is funny wei..keep up the good work..post more..hehe..
Posted by: jm at 03 November 2006 12:09 PM | Link to comment
Sigh.. Homesick... mmmmm.... Did you try BugerFuel when you were in NZ?? there is a buger called "Ring-Burner" bet you can imagine what that does to you.. :) But there are great Char Kiew Tiaw, and Kolo Mee too in NZ! :)
Posted by: Chiwi at 03 November 2006 12:43 PM | Link to comment
Wonder if someone interested in bring the hell pizza business to Malaysia..hahaha sure kena banned!
Posted by: N|ck at 03 November 2006 1:01 PM | Link to comment
I wish I've been to New Zealand. I will surely try Hell out. Did you go anywhere on Halloween? I am your new reader. I manage to finish reading all your post in 2 weeks :p Cheers!
Posted by: JackieThian at 03 November 2006 5:35 PM | Link to comment
2 boring wif pizza hut in malaysia...bt i wonder 'hell' can get a license 2 operate in malaysia..wat d hell if i eat kolo mee wif 'kim cua' bside ne..izit 2 share my ah ah gong n ah ah mah favourite mee even i m eating it
Posted by: jiahaur at 04 November 2006 12:00 AM | Link to comment
There's a restaurant in NYC called Hell's Kitchen.
Posted by: Philea at 04 November 2006 8:07 AM | Link to comment
Hell Yeah!!
Nice Concept....
For sure the pizza so damn hell delicious
Posted by: flanegan at 05 November 2006 6:18 PM | Link to comment
any of you know come from Singapore? Any of you if there is store selling kolo mee in singapore? Never eat it before, just curious because Kenny keeps mention about Kolo Mee. Please recommend good one. I am reachable at index.sg@gmail.com Thanks!
Posted by: andy at 08 November 2006 10:59 PM | Link to comment
XD
Posted by: Jaala at 14 November 2006 12:47 PM | Link to comment
Ohh mannn... i so misss mee kolo I could eat a gazillion bowls of them lardy greasy engg noodles. YUMMMMMMMMMMMMMM... sooonnnnnnnn Ill be back in Nov!!!!
Posted by: Sylvester at 16 November 2006 11:43 PM | Link to comment
haha interesting really =)
Posted by: huiyin at 20 November 2006 12:52 PM | Link to comment
rare dicovery.. interesting.. sumore nid to dispose the packing... haha..
Posted by: ti3n at 20 November 2006 2:05 PM | Link to comment
Put some incense and red candles n it'll be perfect sia.
Posted by: The Horny Bitch at 04 December 2007 10:25 AM | Link to comment
Good one. Reminds me of my visits to the restaurant when i was over there in NZ.
I love the whole place's Halloween setting.
Me and my friends usually tear off the box and fold it out into a coffin and place a piece of pizza for our friend who can't join us for the pizza. Hehe.
Posted by: VicVD at 13 July 2008 1:06 PM | Link to comment
com
