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10 December 2005
Short Talk:
I just watched Survivor: Guatemala for the first time just now. Why is it that every season, they pick the same mix of people on the show? For crying out loud, all the female contestants look like carbon copies of contestants from the last few seasons.
Reader Contributed Engrish!
Immediately after I published my last entry on Shanghai Engrish, a couple of people have e-mailed me photos of Engrish they've spotted around China.
Spotted on the box of a massage chair:

Instead of helping you relieve the fatigue, this massage chair wants you to RELIVE the fatigue!
(Submitted by Sim Teong Chuan)
From a hotel toilet in HangZhou, China:

Be careful of wet floor!
(via Leonard Png, who got it from an e-mail)
From a restaurant menu in a Chinese three-star hotel:

"Picks" = chop

"Three texts cure" = sandwich
God knows what the hell they meant by "many privates".
(More Engrish at Leonard Png's Flickr set)
Of all the Engrish restaurant menus I came across, this one really takes the cake.
(via Weddy's War Zone)


(More Engrish at brendyweddy)
:: Posted by Kenny at 12:21 AM | Link | Facebook It
:: Categorised as 'Engrish'
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94 Comments:
Beijing 2008.. Here we come!
Posted by: sian at 10 December 2005 12:28 AM | Link to comment
lolz!!! sooo farni!!
hey i gotta talk to u more on msn
Posted by: beve at 10 December 2005 12:29 AM | Link to comment
i figured "many privates" means toast (mandarin: tuo si)
Posted by: wen at 10 December 2005 12:39 AM | Link to comment
funny, really funny...
Posted by: cockroach//蟑螂 at 10 December 2005 12:43 AM | Link to comment
I think I know what their "f*ck" means. Direct translation from dry (gan) probably straight from an electronic dictionary cos my friend was selling this product where all the English on the packing is horrichible vegetable standard like "Wipe f*ck your face"
Posted by: Acey at 10 December 2005 12:47 AM | Link to comment
I think the f_ck and landslide things are super funny.
Posted by: serena at 10 December 2005 12:53 AM | Link to comment
First off, let me just say, I laughed my ass off with the "Engrish" man!!!
wahahaha....
And secondly, I agree with you about the Survivor thingy. I stopped regularly watching the show after season 3 when i too made that conclusion..
Cheers
Posted by: Shawn at 10 December 2005 1:03 AM | Link to comment
First off, let me just say, I laughed my ass off with the "Engrish" man!!!
wahahaha....
And secondly, I agree with you about the Survivor thingy. I stopped regularly watching the show after season 3 when i too made that conclusion..
Cheers
Posted by: Shawn at 10 December 2005 1:03 AM | Link to comment
I remember reading this from the newspaper during World Cup 2002!!!
In Korea, in some hotel, they offer message taking or something. Instead of putting "Take your message here" or something, it reads "Take your massage here" and caused some confusion among the Koreans and the foreigns!!! Hehehe!!!~
Posted by: Kazu-chan at 10 December 2005 1:03 AM | Link to comment
Hahaha this post is simply hilarious!!
Posted by: Ying at 10 December 2005 1:09 AM | Link to comment
just tot mite also point out that you have an ATOM Feed....
at http://KennySia.com/atom.xml
Posted by: anon at 10 December 2005 1:10 AM | Link to comment
lol.. farnee~~~ parsely fucks the silk.. hahaha..!
Posted by: met at 10 December 2005 1:15 AM | Link to comment
http://img.photobucket.com/albums/v518/mimosaiba/PICT0279.jpg
check this out so where's the automation?
Posted by: mimosa at 10 December 2005 1:34 AM | Link to comment
kenny! your ID photo so hamsap!! aeuiheiuhriae eh.. i mean handsome!
Posted by: Irene at 10 December 2005 1:37 AM | Link to comment
HAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHHAHAHHA
san wen zhi(sandwich)= three text cure
hahahahhahahahahah brilliant!!!
Posted by: feNnLyn at 10 December 2005 2:10 AM | Link to comment
Obviously the language translation software they use was really 'lurus' and 'word by word'.
The fuck is GAN as KAN in KNN. Hahaha...
And I thought 'Batang Ria' was funny enough already...
Posted by: beef stew at 10 December 2005 2:50 AM | Link to comment
that is damnnnn hilarious!!!!!
Posted by: vaL at 10 December 2005 3:01 AM | Link to comment
For crying out loud! That is so funny!!! These people are so lost!! Hahahaaaa....
Posted by: joD at 10 December 2005 5:21 AM | Link to comment
'many privates' = the 'privates' probably is directly translated: (shi) is a foot soldier/cadet in chinese chess.
Posted by: I'm A Chicken With No Name. BWAK BWAK BWAK! at 10 December 2005 5:32 AM | Link to comment
HAHAHAHAHAhahahaahhahahhahaa *gasps* *chokes* he...lp...
Posted by: Kuzco at 10 December 2005 6:35 AM | Link to comment
Holy hell the last part make me laugh so loud i nearly died!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!
Posted by: Kit Fan at 10 December 2005 6:57 AM | Link to comment
I like the last part. It's amusing how the China nationals try too hard to translate their language into English..
Posted by: Michelle Y at 10 December 2005 7:02 AM | Link to comment
HAHAHAHAHA THEY DIRECTLY TRANSLATED CHINESE TO ENGRISH WORD BY WORD!
NO WONDER THERE ARE MANY PRIVATES AND THE GARLIC JOSS STICKS HAVE TO FUCK TO FRY THE MILK!!!
LOL I SPIT OUT MY RICE WHEN READING IT
ok information overload. :P
Posted by: Cindy at 10 December 2005 7:09 AM | Link to comment
Although come to think of it, why can't they just use "dry" for the 干?
Shows what "clean" minds the China people have...
Posted by: Cindy at 10 December 2005 7:11 AM | Link to comment
wow,is this like for real? amazing
Posted by: I'm A Chicken With No Name. BWAK BWAK BWAK! at 10 December 2005 7:25 AM | Link to comment
the words for sandwich and toast is a common one used by the Hong Kong ppl long time ago. If u go to HK and have breakfast or tea or watever you can see it everywhere.
sandwich = sam man zhi (cantonese)sounds like sandwich
toast = sai doe si (cantonese) means western toast
doesn't mean anything.. just the sound of the words put together.
The gan for f*ck is a very common mistake in china/macau. Seen it before. you guys are right. It's a direct translation.
Posted by: kiker at 10 December 2005 7:54 AM | Link to comment
hello, somebody should go to china and work with them to make proper signage! must be good money and im sure the gov. will be glad to pay???
check it out!
david
usa/singapore
Posted by: hadanymexican at 10 December 2005 8:10 AM | Link to comment
Sometimes I wonder hor.. scali our textbooks are teaching us the rude words all the while, and people elsewhere might be laughing at our engrish instead.
but baby, this one cracked me up. :)
Posted by: Scarlett Ting at 10 December 2005 9:14 AM | Link to comment
you evil you Kenny! laugh at your own Chinese fellows! hee!
Posted by: snn at 10 December 2005 9:22 AM | Link to comment
"France Many Privates" = French Toast (translated based on what's written in Chinese)
Posted by: Anon at 10 December 2005 9:32 AM | Link to comment
Tuo = Many
Si = Si Ping (Soldiers) = Privates (lowest ranking soldiers)
Tuo Si = Many Privates
Posted by: Danny Boy at 10 December 2005 9:42 AM | Link to comment
Super hilarious..
Posted by: uglyfatchick at 10 December 2005 11:18 AM | Link to comment
i think they went through the dictionary and translated it word for word 0_o
Posted by: hayley at 10 December 2005 11:20 AM | Link to comment
yea, mistakes in translation to english in asian signs are pretty funny... but wouldn't it be interesting to see a reverse of the "engrish" bashing? and voila!! here it is!!
www.engrish.com vs. www.hanzimatter.com
here's a sample in case you're wondering...
look at image here: http://www.bmezine.com/tattoo/A51003/high/bmegl144166.jpg
"Granted the character was done correctly, but the question still remains: What is the purpose of having ? (excrement; feces) tattooed on one’s leg?"
Posted by: G`NA at 10 December 2005 11:34 AM | Link to comment
Yeah G'NA, U remind of my friend's ang mo friend, who wanna get a tatoo "In God We Trust" in chinese characters. Guess what my friend gave him in chinese. "Wo Sin Seng" in chinese character. LOL.
Posted by: g0ldf1n93r at 10 December 2005 12:06 PM | Link to comment
the beauty of direct translation?
if sandwich= three text cure is true,
toast = many privates,
Dry (gan) = fuck??? wtf.... LoL...
Posted by: K.O. at 10 December 2005 12:23 PM | Link to comment
That was fucking funny. ahahahaha, kan in mandarin means fuck. but don't they know it's offensive?
Posted by: thenameis at 10 December 2005 2:16 PM | Link to comment
i just showed my China friend your entry and he told me that restaurants in China (excluding Shanghai and Beijing) uses the online translator to translate chinese character to engrishhh. No wonder they have the privates as sandwiches. LOL.
Posted by: thenameis at 10 December 2005 2:21 PM | Link to comment
I simply love the landslides...
hilarious...
shld call it shit slides...or may be 'Eeware of drowning in shit' LoL...
Posted by: Wei De at 10 December 2005 5:39 PM | Link to comment
Oh... dear... god... Hillarious! XD
I remembered that there was one dry cleaner somewhere with the sign outside, saying:
"Drop your pants here for best results."
and a sign outside a japanese hotel (i think):
"You are welcome to take advantage of the chambermaid."
Misleading, yes? XD
Posted by: Reika at 10 December 2005 5:56 PM | Link to comment
the ppl there must be wondering how come tourists like to take pictures of their menu...
hahahaha.
Posted by: JR at 10 December 2005 6:47 PM | Link to comment
oh no... three texts cure. X))
Posted by: USHBIC at 10 December 2005 7:44 PM | Link to comment
once in a small place shoppin complex near guangzhou
instead of writing "mind your head"
they directly wrote "xiao xin peng tou"
my mum who knows no chinese had to ask me what it means..
:/
Posted by: day at 10 December 2005 8:05 PM | Link to comment
OH MY GOD!!!
But really, pity them because (according to what I know from China friend) they actually, started learning English in secondary education
Posted by: TreVesco at 10 December 2005 8:12 PM | Link to comment
you made my day! XD
Posted by: ceres-gal at 10 December 2005 8:15 PM | Link to comment
no lah kenny ! you need to follow the whole series of survivor in order to appreciate the dynamics of the particular game. and they don't all look the same please, take it from this survivor fan. (:
Posted by: clara at 10 December 2005 9:22 PM | Link to comment
wa lao kenny sia u make me laugh until i stomach pain la
Posted by: gab at 10 December 2005 10:11 PM | Link to comment
I think the 2 'fucks' menus were not real. They were done by computers.
Posted by: Choy at 10 December 2005 10:41 PM | Link to comment
TreVesco - it doesn't look like they actually learn English at all. All they seem to learn is the word fuck and then use it any which way they can..
Posted by: suertes at 11 December 2005 12:45 AM | Link to comment
DArn Hilarious!!! Esp the " 干" transalation.. gee!!! No words to describe.. *lol*
Posted by: aMIe at 11 December 2005 1:15 AM | Link to comment
omg?
fuck?
don't they KNOW? that's a universal language that they're speaking!
the first menu.. i like how when u're at lost for words, u just use a mandarin one that no one understands anyway =_=
Posted by: keem at 11 December 2005 9:36 AM | Link to comment
it shud be parsley mixs to fuck the silkworm to produce silk leaves
Posted by: kelvin at 11 December 2005 11:03 AM | Link to comment
it shud be parsley mixs to fuck the silkworm to produce silk leaves
Posted by: kelvin at 11 December 2005 11:04 AM | Link to comment
AHHAHaAHA that kept me rofl for a longggg time!!! =D
Posted by: pj at 11 December 2005 11:26 AM | Link to comment
How leh like that??? Beijing Olympics coming soon mann...
Posted by: Ashley at 11 December 2005 2:42 PM | Link to comment
http://weblogawards.org/2005/12/best_asian_blog.php
why dont have kennysia.com?i want to vote kennysia.com
Posted by: harrytee at 11 December 2005 3:26 PM | Link to comment
You shouldn't have explained the first two errors. Otherwise, funny stuff :)
Posted by: I'm A Chicken With No Name. BWAK BWAK BWAK! at 11 December 2005 4:01 PM | Link to comment
I saw one the an SMRT bus that said -
Please press the bell in advance before alighting at your destined stop
Posted by: gwen at 11 December 2005 5:55 PM | Link to comment
Just dropping by a line to add on opinion about Asian Weblog Award 2005. I am not good reader but occassional reader to read entertaining and interesting elements in blogger's website especially Kenny, Xiaxue and Scarlett Ting. I noted Mr Brown has got a huge of voters compared XiaXue's voters. Mr Brown sometimes put the link of Asian Weblog Award 2005 in each of his entry to hopefully gain voters whereas Xiaxue didn't put the link somehow. That could explain why Mr Brown has got a rise in the number of voters? Looks like Xiaxue never plan strategy but let it be natural. Salute with the way she doing.
Last but not least, hilarious entries, Kenny. Keep the good work up. Hope you enjoy your trip to KL and have fun. Wishing you have a great season greetings.
p/s:I am not Xiaxue's fan. Just pouring my opinion whatever is in my mind only. No offence, please. Or just in case for those who take the offence, I apologise.
Posted by: Occassion Reader at 11 December 2005 8:04 PM | Link to comment
Ah ha..I also have a few over at my site, come take a look.
Posted by: dtsc at 11 December 2005 8:39 PM | Link to comment
yea...f*ck the Meat with them garlics
Posted by: Pheromonic Pharmacist at 11 December 2005 10:59 PM | Link to comment
MUAHAHAHHAA!!! THIS REALLY CRACKED ME UP SO HARD!!! btw, the "privates" meant "soldiers" i suspect...direct translation from the chinese character stated lah! =D
Posted by: meowmeow at 11 December 2005 11:10 PM | Link to comment
Hi Kenny,
I've kena KennySia-ed!!! No wonder my traffic increased due to this post!!! Thanks alot, bro!
Posted by: Leonard at 12 December 2005 1:29 PM | Link to comment
This is what happens when you use unqualified foreigners to do your work, no matter how ell they do at your interviews! Being native does mean they speak good native tongue, never invite trouble with allowing an American gardener applying for a job as an English teacher!
Posted by: peggy at 14 December 2005 4:47 PM | Link to comment
where the hell did they get the idea to translate it to the F word?
Posted by: a.S.a at 15 December 2005 2:15 PM | Link to comment
private = 士兵。。 哈哈哈
Posted by: I'm A Chicken With No Name. BWAK BWAK BWAK! at 15 December 2005 5:50 PM | Link to comment
hello! tks for mentioning my post. i feel so honoured. no wonder i got a jumpstart in trafiic.
Posted by: brendywendy at 16 December 2005 12:35 AM | Link to comment
theres still one i remember " qing bao chi gan jing" (please keep the are clean) and it was translated into "please keep cleaning"
Posted by: abcdefg at 20 December 2005 1:11 PM | Link to comment
many privates = toast
it's in cantonese.
'tor si'
Posted by: I'm A Chicken With No Name. BWAK BWAK BWAK! at 21 December 2005 2:17 PM | Link to comment
they must got one of those electronic dictionary, key in word by word, and just assemble them in the same order
Posted by: hendry at 21 December 2005 5:35 PM | Link to comment
The 'privates' in "many privates" refers to the military rank. Duo = many. Shi = privates.
Noticed all the translations were literal. Probably they did individual word translation from the internet translation engine.
Posted by: Jenny at 29 December 2005 1:01 PM | Link to comment
I pray that China nation will improve someday...
Infact, we should not have just looking at those mistakes, anyone ever thinks and admits that there are China people nowadays could speak English as well as the British or American? At least, even sounds much more better than so called, "Manglish" or "Singlish".
Posted by: spiceberry.... at 29 December 2005 4:28 PM | Link to comment
HAHA!!!!!!!!!! O M G !!! so bloody funny!!!
Posted by: san at 06 January 2006 1:01 AM | Link to comment
Privates in mandarin are called "shi" as in soldiers.
Posted by: Joanna at 06 January 2006 8:30 PM | Link to comment
ya...those stupid ppl in china doesn't know how to translate....i believe there's something called the "DICTIONARY" in china 2....through i'm also chinese....those ppl should learn more english...they swearing ...how stupid...
Posted by: Niko at 06 March 2006 12:59 AM | Link to comment
Oh my goodness! Imagine they translate
Si Ham Kwai Tiu .. will be
Shit Cockerels Ghost Fuck?
Posted by: Epileatheral at 22 March 2006 10:52 AM | Link to comment
chinks aree really stupid huh..i think its they eyes
Posted by: law at 23 March 2006 11:21 PM | Link to comment
hhaahaa.. Three text cure.... ? O_o!!
Posted by: Shopper at 04 April 2006 12:39 AM | Link to comment
The 士 in 多士 also means soldier, pawn, so I guess a Private. So ... Many Privates.
Posted by: I'm A Chicken With No Name. BWAK BWAK BWAK! at 06 May 2006 4:27 AM | Link to comment
I take offense to the racist comment by 'law'. "chinks aree really stupid huh..i think its they eyes". Based on your mistakes-prone comment, it looks like you are the stupid one. I would refer your readers to http://hanzismatter.com which shows pictures and pictures of fools who know absolutely nothing about Chinese characters and yet have shit tattooed all over their bodies.
Posted by: ktula
at 24 May 2006
3:16 PM | Link to comment
On a lighter note, this is what i discovered on my current trip to Fuzhou.
http://ktula.com/2006/05/21/take-that-all-ya-stds/
Posted by: ktula
at 24 May 2006
3:20 PM | Link to comment
lol lol lol seriously!!!!!! are they for real? nooooo they must be kidding rite?? siao !!!!
Posted by: dreamer at 10 June 2006 6:14 PM | Link to comment
totally hilarious man ! ! !
you have really made the day for some1
at least i get to continue living life to the fullest at other peoples expense !
Posted by: benjamin lee at 15 June 2006 7:06 PM | Link to comment
While you laugh at the translation, just be aware non Chinese speakers who learn Mandarin make similar stupid mistakes when they translate from English to Chinese.
For those of you who are Chinese who think you are not, look in the mirror and you will see how disgusting you look.
I am Chinese Malaysian and proud of being a Chinese. I do not laugh at my own people. While the translation look funny, I laugh but I don't judge. I always remember where my ancestors come from.
If you laugh and think you are somehow superior, you are laughing at your own incompetence and your own insecurity.
Posted by: Chan at 27 July 2006 3:00 PM | Link to comment
I saw one from an email, really ridiculars one at that too... The photo was taken in a supermarket, where they had this sign called "gan huo" meaning dried food stuff, but they directly translated in below the chinese words on the sign as "fuck goods"
Posted by: wintersnow at 19 August 2006 2:05 PM | Link to comment
man...this is classic. wtf.. :P
Posted by: mich at 22 October 2006 1:55 PM | Link to comment
Agree with you Chan.
Posted by: I'm A Chicken With No Name. BWAK BWAK BWAK! at 03 November 2006 11:44 AM | Link to comment
Pioneering screenwriter Nigel Kneale, best known for the Quatermass TV serials and films, dies aged 84...
Posted by: Saul Christensen at 13 November 2006 4:39 AM | Link to comment
Hi Dude, i have bookmarked your blog after reading this articles! lolx!
Posted by: Steve Wong at 02 December 2006 4:13 AM | Link to comment
haha..funny..but izt shame on china?haha
Posted by: jia xian at 13 March 2007 1:22 AM | Link to comment
I think their government ought to do something so they won't humiliate all the chinese in the world. Even me myself is feeling embarased to see all these.. craps...
Posted by: amomhrer at 12 August 2007 11:37 PM | Link to comment
omg ,this is f'in nuts lah...only in china:)
Posted by: I'm A Chicken With No Name. BWAK BWAK BWAK! at 01 September 2007 1:28 PM | Link to comment
"Shi" in chinese can be said as soldiers, or in current terms, "private", ever heard of "Shi bin"
Without the "bin" many people wouldn't understand either.
Posted by: Sianz at 12 December 2007 5:07 PM | Link to comment
This blog really make my day. Had a really good laugh which is rare these days. Thanks Kenny.
Anyway, after reading this, I was just thinking to myself, I wouldn't want the Chinese translating 干妈. Just thought it's gonna sound really bad.
Posted by: Cheryl at 21 June 2008 9:30 PM | Link to comment


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