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17 February 2005
Ansell vibe4u Vibrating Condom Review
I first encountered Ansell's range of vibrating condoms whilst browsing through Bek's photo blog. Curious, I went straight to the nearest pharmacy I could find to purchase this elusive vibrating condom to see what its all about.
Ansell vibe4u Vibrating Condom comes in a nicely designed red package - a nice departure from the ubiquitous "man and woman holding hands" type packaging that Durex seems to favour. For our convenience, the battery is included for the vibrating ring.
I can't believe I paid AUD$12.95 (RM35) for this thing! This is just one condom and some buzzing cock ring we're talking about! Mannn... the money I'm sacrificing for this site.
The top of the box tells you once again that battery is included, so that you don't have to rush off to 7-Eleven to purchase some batteries in the middle of your coital session. The condom is regular size, which is no good to me since mine is extra large.
Here's the content of the box: an Ansell catalogue, a vibe4u instruction booklet, a regular condom, and the vibrating ring. I kinda like the wrapping of the vibrating ring. It reminded me of the crappy toys that came with the Ding Dang chocolates.
The Ansell catalogue is damn cool. It shows you the range of different condom shapes available, so you choose the one that fits you better. Kinda like Levi's jeans. I'm still waiting for a Boot Cut Condom to come along.
The vibe4u instruction booklet sheds some light on the use of this product. Apparently, the battery on the vibrating ring lasts for fifteen minutes only and is not replacable. It also asks you to take some precautions when using the vibrating ring, such as:
- Do not use under the influence of alcohol or drugs (What? C'mon! I'm just using a vibrating ring, not a freakin' CAR!)
- Do not swallow (And why exactly would I swallow it?)
- Keep away from children (sorry Michael Jackson, this one is not for you.)
Oh look! Pornography on kennysia.com! Teehee. Here, Ansell shows you how to put on a condom. Frankly speaking though, I think the illustration sucks (no pun intended). Don't you think the penis look like some sort of carrot wearing a baseball cap?
Anyway, its time for me to experiment with this vibrating condom thing. I wanted to try it on myself, but my genitals went on strike at the thought of appearing on the internet. So once again I had to find a sacrifice. Meet my blueberry flavoured Vodka Cruiser.
Here's a picture of the vibrating ring up close. The AUD$1 coin (similar in size to the RM1 coin) is there for comparison. The ring itself is made of some gel-like silicone. There's a little switch on the side there. You push it in and the gentle vibrations will start.
The Ansell condom itself is made in India. I have to say, it comes very very very lubricated. There's a slight, but not overwhelming, latex smell.
Okay, so I was wrong about it being just a regular-sized condom. Look at THAT, it fits the whole 7/8th of the ENTIRE BOTTLE of Vodka Cruiser!!! So much for a regular size. I reckon these condoms must have been made for elephants down in India!
This is what it looks like when you put the vibrating ring on. Looks odd. How often do you see a bottle of alcohol with a vibrating ring around its neck? I switched on the vibrating ring, and felt a gentle buzz permeating to the palm of my hand. Pleasurable.
So what do I think about this whole vibrating condom thing? Well its a novel idea, certainly worth trying out on something else other than a bottle of alcohol. But I reckon the AUD$12.95 price tag is a little bit steep. If a normal condom cost AUD$1, you're paying an extra AUD$12 just for some stupid vibrating ring that can last for only 15 minutes. I don't know, but 15 minutes seems a little bit short. *grins*
My suggestion:
1. Get a normal condom
2. Get some rubber band
3. Using rubber band, tie your mobile phone to the condom
4. Call your own phone. And don't bloody answer your phone while its still attached to your dick dammit!
It works the same way, I swear!
:: Posted by Kenny at 1:24 AM | Link | Facebook It
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46 Comments:
two thumbs up for your ingenuity ! :-D
Posted by: charlyn at 17 February 2005 1:45 AM | Link to comment
so the vibrating condom is a male sex toy per se or to enhance the female's experience?
Posted by: kimcun at 17 February 2005 1:52 AM | Link to comment
haha I think I'm dying in my epileptic fits of laughter HAHAHAHAHAHAHA holy crap man haha I was gonna buy one too -- just for the sake of it -- till I realised I could have bought 43.17, 30cent soft-serves from McDonald's or Burger King so I gave it a rest hahaha but you're right, fifteen minutes is a bit short -- how about we make it 45? :-p
Posted by: Bek at 17 February 2005 2:37 AM | Link to comment
LOLz... Actually, I've seen one of those in Kuching.. And it wasn't sold in a pharmacy but by a dealer at my workplace.. Mind you.. It was sold at my workplace and one of my colleagues bought it to try it out like what you just did!
And regarding your post on Valentine's Day... It's not every Valentine's that we girls need to have flowers and candlelight dinners... I personally prefer to spend some quiet time at home together or go clubbing together... I totally agree that what is most important is that we have each other...
Posted by: annabella at 17 February 2005 3:29 AM | Link to comment
15 minutes? how sad.
yer suggestion bout de handphone could be done well. ur a true inventor. =)
Posted by: ThunderFoxy at 17 February 2005 4:45 AM | Link to comment
lol ... celaka, wheni reach the last pic .. it was damn funny man ... haha, but then again with the phone attached to your "brother", then the other counterpart will have to accomodate the size of your brother and the phone? hmmm what happens of any of those fluids on the phone causes shocks? who is to blame, the phone comp or you?
hahaha freakin hilarious man!
Posted by: earl-ku at 17 February 2005 5:04 AM | Link to comment
mm u actually tried the hp thingy ah? how come u know it works =p
anyway, u just waisted $12 on that? what the? and not use it some more? wahh..its alright, u're earning big bucks anyway
Posted by: chrissieeeeee at 17 February 2005 8:03 AM | Link to comment
lol great post! btw.. i don think SE phonese are water proof.. not even 700i :P
Posted by: MunKit at 17 February 2005 1:04 PM | Link to comment
haha freaking hilarious. but i think this is the dumbest product ever! y would u want vibration on the base of ur dick? they should put it at the tip of the condom... i think with each penetration, the thing is to stimulate the girl's clit. but for a intensive 15 min of pounding, i think that's to ensure the girl gets at least one sure orgasm.
Posted by: cccp at 17 February 2005 2:06 PM | Link to comment
HAhahah....this has gotta b the funniest blog i've seen so far! Did u really try on the vibrating mobile phone thingy? Anyways....good job n keep it up!
Posted by: Justina at 17 February 2005 2:17 PM | Link to comment
charlyn - Two thumbs up is actually not enough if you want to apply a condom. Heh.
kimcun - yes! i think you've just hit the spot.
Bek - Haha! You are proof that as far as women are concerned, desserts are better than sex! 45 minutes sound about right. But I've heard its not the length that counts, its how you use it. ;)
annabella - I hope your colleague didn't try it out on someone you know. Heh. About V-day: What? You won't feel left out if all your girl friends have flowers from their bfs and you have none?
Victoria - How about having the handphone set on vibrate AND play the Jenna Jameson Moan Tone?! How about THAT? Damn I'm a genius. I amaze myself sometimes.
earl-ku - who is to blame? the guy stupid enough to follow Kenny Sia's advise and straps his handphone to his dick, that's who!
chrissie - actually i still have the vibrating ring. you want? *sniggers*
MunKit - True. If that's the case, you might actually have to put the phone INSIDE the condom. Then again...
cccp - If you put it at the tip of the condom, you might have to do some fishing if it gets lost in the abyss, see?
Justina - Thanks Jus, I'll definitely keep it up, even if that meant popping a few viagra pills.
Posted by: Kenny Sia at 17 February 2005 9:36 PM | Link to comment
oooooooo vibrating condoms. i would lOve to have a go with one of those.. wonder if they sell them in malaysia... thanks for the update! caught my attention there now i'm really intrigued
Posted by: vanessa at 17 February 2005 11:27 PM | Link to comment
hahaha omgg the lengths ppl go thru in the name of blogging huh? ;] kudos!
Posted by: *lilyng at 18 February 2005 5:33 AM | Link to comment
Wow, never knew ppl would come up with stuff like this! XD Just hope nobody gets electrocuted doing this, but then again, with a little battery like that, perhaps they'll just get a mild shock which they could mistake for an orgasm ;)
Posted by: applegal at 18 February 2005 9:39 AM | Link to comment
u made my day....hahha.. im still laughin now!
Posted by: tedsta at 18 February 2005 1:52 PM | Link to comment
My colleague was just curious... LOLz... Well, flowers are not a necessity... Candlelight dinners would be more romantic if dinner was cooked together and done at home rite? Gifts are fine... Something nice and special... Doesn't matter if it isn't something I've hinted.. As long as it means something to both of us...
Posted by: annabella at 18 February 2005 3:20 PM | Link to comment
oh my gawd that's scary-lookin!! LOL =P
Posted by: Reta at 18 February 2005 8:38 PM | Link to comment
Reta - Some things may look scary, but turn out to be nice once you tasted it. eg. Durian. ;)
annabella - Question is, who do the cooking? Who do the washing? Guys rite? SEEEEEEEE? jk lah. You are one in a million girls to think that way, and that's a good thing. I'm sure your partner will be very happy.
tedy - man to man, saying 'you made my day' in this context is a bit....
applegal - I would be very surprised if someone gets electrocuted. At least they die happy.
*lilyng - you said 'lengths', haha!
vanessa - well, first you gotta get laid, you know?
Posted by: Kenny Sia at 18 February 2005 9:20 PM | Link to comment
haha! u r funny!
couldnt find the google ads stuff to click for you though!!
Posted by: Callie at 19 February 2005 4:05 AM | Link to comment
your mobile phone can vibe more than 15 minutes at once call???
i will remodel it!
BATTERY -> PLUG :)
Posted by: Jus at 16 March 2005 5:29 PM | Link to comment
Hey Kenny, I stumbled onto your blog somehow. Your April Fool's post really cracked me up so I decided to read your other posts. Gosh, you're one hilarious guy! Good job there! I look forward to reading more of your postings. =)
Posted by: Aggie at 02 April 2005 6:50 AM | Link to comment
Ok so I actually tried the vibrating condom with the little capsule thing and it feels brilliant!
It seemed to work really gud just as ur about to cum and it's vibrating under the base of ur dick... marvelous!
Anyho... do try it - it makes ur dick feel numb after 15mins so 45mins wud turn ur sausage into a cherio.. and on that note... cherio!
Posted by: Alex at 29 May 2005 7:09 PM | Link to comment
My man, your insensuous appetite for such "gadgets" makes you a good candidate next to Ron Jeremy :)
Posted by: Jonathan at 05 June 2005 9:19 PM | Link to comment
pfffwhhooooarrrrrr
Must be some special girl can fit in a vibrating mobile phone as well as a huge bottle like that!
i laughed so hard I nearly crap my pants.
Posted by: IB at 17 June 2005 1:10 PM | Link to comment
small dick
Posted by: I'm A Chicken With No Name. BWAK BWAK BWAK! at 25 June 2005 5:22 AM | Link to comment
I think I'm a little late in posting this... It's cuz i just recently caught on to the Kenny Sia Crazeand read this post and found it very heartfelt... anyways...I get really frustrated and I mean REALLY! frustrated, when my gf does the try-guess-wat-i'm-thinking-now stare at me...I'll always be at lost... It's like playing hang-man, wen i guess wrongly, i die a horrible death; when i guess it correctly i'm like "YES!! SCORE bebeh!!" and i do the vitory dance in my mind, but outside i look calm and cool like i knew what she was thinking all along...
But then if i think properly... it actually makes sense how gals think...they want you to guess what they feel cuz they wanan find out how much you know them... i know its a wierd way, but if you turn to your femenine side, it actually feel a little right. DAMN! there were SO many times i wish i could read minds....
p/s: props to KENNY SIA! he and his posts RULES!! Mianly cuz i'm form Sabah, and we from same piece of land, although quite far away... proud to be form same piece of land with you man...
Posted by: Pringles at 23 July 2005 11:14 PM | Link to comment
damn i'm a Noob....i clicked 'post' in a different blog...and it ended up here..sorry if i sounded stoopid everyone...
Posted by: Pringles at 23 July 2005 11:26 PM | Link to comment
A bit too big to fit, right? Unless her chibai is a cow's. (What about 'call waiting', I wonder...)
=_=!!!
Posted by: iman00b at 08 October 2005 7:54 PM | Link to comment
the last pic..i cracked up! i
m going to go look at it again and laugh myself silly...
check this out...http://www.lowbright.com/Comics/10Commandments/10Commandments.htm
Posted by: XD at 07 January 2006 2:58 AM | Link to comment
Sicko..!!! Experimenting condoms on ketchup bottle, and now vodka bottle?!?!?! Mahai you're damn fuckin funny and very sick as well... LOL.
Posted by: obi meowz at 17 January 2006 10:37 AM | Link to comment
Hello...Lin Peh wan to blog about this vibrating condom in my tok3tok4 blog. Can I pinjam a few pictures from your posting ? Will post a link back to u. Thanks in advance.
Posted by: Lin Peh at 04 April 2006 5:12 PM | Link to comment
damn informative man. step by step picture some more.
ermm....but i think the condom is not for your own play lah. it's for you to stick into something...and how are you suppose to stick the stick, condom and the handphone into somewhere? must be damn big hole!
Posted by: mslenglui at 05 April 2006 9:56 AM | Link to comment
LOL...*rolling around in bed
2 thumbs up to u Kenny...u such a good sifu to those guys out there..!!!
Posted by: Lyn at 29 June 2006 1:26 AM | Link to comment
Hehe you had the Sony Ericsson K500i? So did I, lol.
And how innovative. X) Technically I shouldn't be reading this since I'm like 13, but oh wells.
Posted by: Karmen at 23 July 2006 1:01 AM | Link to comment
i dont know what to think about this new found condom i just wonder how if it's being slapped over and over again and again how is it not breaking?
Posted by: Sam at 22 August 2006 1:23 AM | Link to comment
>ermm....but i think the condom is not for your >own play lah. it's for you to stick into >something...and how are you suppose to stick >the stick, condom and the handphone into >somewhere? must be damn big hole!
Yeah your mama's pretty loose ;)
Posted by: Drakkus at 25 September 2006 2:39 PM | Link to comment
ROTFLMAO! Yours IS a novel idea! Who knows guys won't do it?
Posted by: Annie at 23 February 2007 10:23 AM | Link to comment
Haha. Good one, Kenny! Only you can think of such things! Like the World Cup football post, I nearly fell off me chair!
Posted by: EmElle at 25 September 2007 5:10 PM | Link to comment
OMG!
boys will start 'playing' their handphones now
hehe
Posted by: chen at 28 November 2007 9:23 PM | Link to comment
loll
Posted by: I'm A Chicken With No Name. BWAK BWAK BWAK! at 23 January 2008 9:05 AM | Link to comment
now thats the real truth behind all that toy stuff. And ppl actually bought it! Thats wat i call Looks can be sooo deceiving!
Posted by: desdy at 20 February 2008 1:07 PM | Link to comment
i dun find this hilarious..
Posted by: I'm A Chicken With No Name. BWAK BWAK BWAK! at 17 March 2008 7:15 PM | Link to comment
Mobile Waves kill sperms
Posted by: Heyhey at 28 March 2008 6:52 PM | Link to comment
WTF! LOL! so much for the lil sperms to survive! no lil kennies!
Posted by: kwen at 29 May 2008 9:20 PM | Link to comment
ya, use nokia 3310 for better experience!
Posted by: joshuatly at 30 May 2008 1:52 PM | Link to comment
shiz...the part using the handphone made me spray my monitor with cincau... hahahahah
Posted by: ching at 04 September 2008 2:41 PM | Link to comment
com
